Unspoken Feelings
by dream7me7to7sleep
Summary: Sookie Stackhouse has not been able to speak a word since surviving the car accident that killed her parents. After years of being bullied by her classmates and ignored by her brother, Sookie has become used to living in her silence... Until the Northmans move to town and Eric Northman and his sister Pam take an immediate liking to the quiet girl. AH:AU:HEA
1. Chapter 1

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Welcome to my newest story, everyone! I'm back on a self-editing kick, so this should be fun. As you read in the summary, this story is an AH-Eric/Sookie fanfic. Another first for me in the SVM world, but_ Catalyst _was my first 1POV, and I think it went just fine. Never fear!_

 _As always, I will do my one and only disclaimer for the series right now:_

 _ **I DON'T OWN ANYTHING. I DON'T MAKE ANY MONEY DOING THIS. I JUST HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO!**_

 _Now that that's out of the way, on to the story! Enjoy!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter One: Crazy Sookie Makes a Friend**

 **September 1996**

Sookie Stackhouse had long ago become the Ghost of Bon Temps. Eight years, as a matter of fact, was the duration she had so far haunted the small town twenty minutes south of Shreveport, Louisiana. Though she was entirely visible to all the residents, young, old and in-between, she may as well have been little more than a wandering spirit for all the impact she made around those who encountered her.

"Welcome back everyone!" Mrs. Fleure sweetly greeted her sophomore homeroom. Her eyes bounced to each chair, looking for a flicker of cheer. Several students looked down at their desks to hide that they were not happy about the first day of school, but one pair stared steadily at her. Sookie Stackhouse and her unsettling smile. "Did everyone have a nice summer vacation?" You would think after having the girl in her class the previous year, Katherine Fleure would have become used to the attentively trained eyes of her student, but nothing on earth could acclimate anyone to the Stackhouse girl's unwavering, unnaturally strained smile.

She was perfectly aware that Sookie Stackhouse always did her work on time and acquired exceptional grades, but never bothered calling on her in class. Even the summer class she'd hosted which had included the strange girl hadn't eased the strain she felt around her. Sookie would give you her undivided attention, but she would not speak. She had not spoken in eight years.

Not since…

Of course, the accident had been in the local headlines, but it wasn't until Sookie entered middle school that the teachers were reminded what that car crash had caused other than the deaths of Mr. and Mrs. Stackhouse. Both parents had lost their lives, but Sookie had survived. After two weeks in a coma, Sookie had awakened, but did not speak. Principal Clark had used the word 'traumatized' several times when he warned all of them, and Katherine felt compelled to agree.

"Well," the teacher finally continued, "if no one wants to tell us about their summer vacation, I guess we should continue with homeroom announcements. Tomorrow we will have a new student joining the sophomore class. Her name is Pamela Northman, and I want you all to greet her warmly tomorrow!"

"Yeah, Stackhouse, don't go mouthing off!" Mark Thompson shouted across the room, making several students snicker. Katherine looked worriedly at her student, but Sookie didn't even bat an eye and her mouth never broke from its deranged grin. She _did_ glance down at her notebook, but that was all.

 _The infamous notebook_ , Katherine sighed internally. Whenever Sookie chose to participate in class, which only involved writing answers to questions, she would scrawl the response on her notebook page and hold it up. Katherine detested this method, but had to admit it was better than not being able to call on her at all. In the last school year, Katherine had adapted to Sookie's needs, but had secretly resented that special accommodations were made. After all, children lost parents all the time and didn't succumb to such extreme responses. What did Sookie expect to do for a job if she refused to speak? No matter what anyone else said, Katherine was _certain_ Sookie just didn't _want_ to speak.

Sookie sat quietly throughout homeroom, wondering how long it would take the new girl to start making fun of her along with the rest of Bon Temps. If there was one thing everyone in town could unite on, it was that Crazy Sookie was worth getting a laugh over. Her own brother often got gales of laughter from his friends at her expense, but that was fine. It was one more way to pay for what she'd done. It was one more way to seek forgiveness. It was the only way she thought she could be absolved for the murder of her own parents.

During the fall of third grade, Sookie had been eight years old, and she had been playing somewhere. She couldn't remember where, the accident had stolen most of her memories from that day. She had screamed and yelled at her parents to the point of tears. She didn't know why she'd made such a fuss, but the crying had gone on and on. She had thrown such a tantrum about something that surely it was what had caused her daddy to crane his neck around to yell at her. That had to be why they had gone off the road. It had to be why her parents were dead.

The next thing she remembered was waking in the hospital with Gran at her bed side, praying long and hard. Sookie had tried to ask what happened, but parts of her felt disconnected. Her body felt slow to respond, and that familiar path from her brain to her mouth had vanished. In a way, it wasn't that she couldn't speak, it was that she couldn't remember how she'd ever done it in the first place.

Of course, she hadn't awoken from her coma with the intention of not speaking. At first, doctors believed the silence came from the disorientation and the brain swelling from her head trauma. However, once the swelling had gone down, Sookie still could not remember how to make the words come out. She could comprehend the things around her, but could not turn her own thoughts into words. After two more weeks in the hospital, visits from specialists and dozens of tests, it was finally determined that there wasn't a physical cause for her muteness.

After the verdict was in, a new set of specialists were filed through Sookie's room. It was only a few days before they all agreed that Sookie would speak again when she was good and ready. That news had only brought Sookie more anxiety because she felt as though, this too, were all her fault.

" _It serves her right!" Jason had yelled and cried into their Gran's shoulder._ Her own brother thought the loss of her voice was what she deserved for killing their parents, and Sookie couldn't have agreed more with him by that point. An inability to hold her tongue is what had caused the crash. God had probably seen her not honoring her parents and decided that she didn't deserve them anymore. For good measure, he took her voice too so she couldn't hurt anyone else with it.

"Sookie," Tara Thornton craned to look back at her, "I need a pen."

Sookie looked at the girl twisted around to face her and Tara resisted the urge to recoil. There was always some gap between talking to Sookie and receiving a response. The blonde always seemed to come out of a fog whenever someone spoke to her.

Reaching into her bag, Sookie produced a pen and handed it to Tara. Without a response, Tara took it just before the bell rang to signal the end of homeroom and the start of first period. Tara was the only person who spoke to her other than teachers. Sure, it was only in the form of asking for a writing utensil, notes or paper, but at least it was never in the form of insults. They had been very close before the accident, but shortly after Sookie returned to school things had changed. Mostly Tara only looked at her or said a word to her when she needed something. Still, Sookie kept giving things to her classmate because it took some of the loneliness out of her silent life to have someone say her name every so often.

Sookie rose to head for her history class, already thinking about a new picture she could sketch throughout the day. She quickly got to her desk, took out her pen and began to doodle. By the end of fourth period, she had three pages of different flowers drawn in blue, black and red ink. They were good in the sense that she had drawn them so often that they had been perfected to the best of Sookie's ability, but that was all.

"These are pretty," Sookie turned her head slowly at the boy who came to her table with a lunch tray. It was Bill Compton, one of her brother's closest childhood friends. Since the Compton house was only a valley away from the Stackhouse farm, Jason and Bill had palled around most of their childhood despite Bill being a year younger. The two of them and Hoyt Fortenberry were still best friends to this day.

Sookie looked at Bill with hesitation. The only one of Jason's friends who wasn't mean to her was Hoyt. Bill had a knack for acting like he had finally outgrown harassing her only to do something cruel. Bill's tormenting had escalated from a gob of gum ground into her scalp to tearing her favorite book in half down the spine. The most recent, however, had been less about doing physical damages, and more about trying to hurt her emotionally. She had no proof, but she was certain Bill had been the one to put notes with the words, "Mute Bitch," in her locker in sixth grade.

Sookie felt bad for Bill. Even with a valley of graves between their houses, she could still hear his father beating him on quiet nights. Everyone knew that Robert Compton was a drunk, and they knew that's why his wife Julia had left him. Sookie was certain that the only ones who knew about the beatings were Jason, Hoyt and herself, although she hoped Bill didn't know that she knew.

Bill stared at Sookie and she stared right back as if waiting to hear what he wanted. Finally the Junior turned around and walked to his table of friends. Jason and Hoyt as well as most of the football team welcomed Bill as always. Sookie looked at her brother briefly, but there was an obvious air of dismissal that the sister quickly acknowledged by looking back at her food. So, she continued to sit alone, eating her meal in silence.

As her food slowly disappeared, Sookie couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to have someone sitting across from her at the table. Would people point and whisper less? What would her company say to fill the silence as they ate together? Would their inevitable points of silence be companionable or awkward?

When her lunch was gone, Sookie wandered to the library like she usually did and spent the remainder of her free time hunting down a new book to read. The library was her safe haven. No one could hurt her here. It was the one place she felt she didn't need to sustain the punishment that was her accepted act of contrition for the deaths of her parents. Everyone was silent here, and she could be normal for a few short minutes.

All too soon lunchtime was over, and Sookie found herself wandering to her next class with a new book to read. She perused it all through her english class, and drew more flowers in her math class. The only subject she paid any mind to in the second half of school was her anatomy/physiology class. Dr. Jones would chop her head off if she played around in his class. She liked that about him. He didn't treat her any different from other students. He asked her questions in class and beamed with pride when she wrote out the answer. All the other teachers seemed happy enough to leave her be as long as she turned her homework in on time. Dr. Jones forced her to participate all throughout her ninth grade biology class last year. Unfortunately, the teacher for Sookie's summer Chemistry class hadn't been as insistent about her participation.

"Stackhouse, stick around a minute. Don't worry, you won't miss your bus," Dr. Jones stopped Sookie as she packed up her belongings. She sat patiently while the other students filed out, "As you know, part of this class's requirement is giving a researched demonstration." Sookie looked at her hands nervously. She had always had to take an incomplete on class projects like these, but her otherwise perfect grades remained mostly unharmed. "Now, you could partner up with someone who can give the explanation of the demonstration and I will give you a passing grade as long as I am told you helped."

Sookie deflated further. No one in her science class would help her. It didn't matter how smart she was. Having to spend several afternoons and a possible weekend with her was unimaginable to her classmates.

"The new transfer student will be in your class," Dr. Jones pointed out optimistically. "Would you like me to suggest it to her?"

Sookie bowed her head and shook it.

"Sookie, this demonstration is thirty percent of your grade for this semester. That will mean you can only get as high as a C for the semester in this class," Dr. Jones warned.

Taking her notepad out, Sookie wrote, _"Could I just write out my speech like I usually do for partial credit?"_

"If I make an exception for you, then everyone will start forgoing the project for partial credit, Sookie," Dr. Jones sighed. "I'm not trying to bully you, but what are you going to do if you don't start learning to work with others?"

" _I just want to draw,"_ Sookie replied.

Dr. Jones smiled, "I know you enjoy that very much, Sookie, but do you love it because it's your calling? Or do you love it because it lets you continue to hide?" When Sookie didn't reply, Dr. Jones stood back up. "Think about it. We won't even begin handing in papers for it until Homecoming. If you change your mind about pairing with the new student, let me know and I will talk to her for you."

Sookie nodded as she gathered her things back up and headed for the door. The hallways were already thinning down as more and more students raced to get a good seat on the buses. There were only a couple dozen by the time Sookie got to her locker, and she quickly shoved all her materials inside.

It was a mad dash to make it to the bus, but Sookie managed to take a seat near the middle of the war zone that was Bus 16. The middle of the bus was always the worst. There were always things being thrown around and screaming back and forth. The middle just always seemed to catch all the debris.

Finally it was their stop; an eight minute walk to the house with Jason, Bill Compton, and herself. Sookie carefully trailed several feet behind, knowing better than to have her back to Bill or even her brother. Despite the fact Jason knew that Sookie wouldn't say shit if she had a mouthful he had never laid a hand on her. He also never stopped or prevented an assault on his sister. That was why Sookie remained cautious of those around her until she was safely at home.

"Whoa," Bill stopped suddenly to look up at the old Beauchéne Plantation, "the people working on Rosenfont Hall have really done a great job!"

Jason snorted, "You always had a hard on for that place."

"Rosenfont is the jewel of Bon Temps! It's the only thing people come to this shit hole to see!" Bill protested. "It's the epitome of Southern Colonial-"

"Yeah, yeah, you wanna be an architect. I get it," Jason grumbled with a roll of his eyes. He kept walking home, but Bill remained paused in front of Rosenfont Hall.

Sookie stood frozen as well, but it was not in admiration of the ongoing restoration. If she kept walking then Bill would be able to sneak up on her. She needed a good head start to even hope to outrun him. The girl's heart thrummed achingly against her ribs. Her house was a six minute walk from Rosenfont, four if she ran full throttle, but Bill was faster by far. If he got the urge to take after her, four minutes was three minutes too long.

Just as Sookie was resolving to make a break for it, Bill snapped his eyes on her. "Isn't it beautiful?" he asked and Sookie swallowed and nodded in agreement. Without any warning other than his gaze, Sookie already knew that this conversation would not end well for her. "You haven't even looked at it. Look," he pointed, but her eyes remained trained on him. Bill snatched her arm and pulled her toward him. "Look. At. It."

Shivering nervously, Sookie needed all her will power to look away from Bill. As her head finally started to turn, she felt Bill's hand leave her wrist and touch the back of her neck. As she predicted, the encounter was turning sour. Bill pushed her to the ground and pressed her face into the gravel road.

Without her consent, a sharp cry burst from Sookie's mouth, and Bill grinned. "See? You can make noises just fine. So, why don't you tell me to stop? Come on! Tell me to stop, you stupid mute!" She felt his hand press harder, and the gravel imbedded deeper into her cheek and temple. Despite the whine that continued to pour from her mouth, Bill continued to mock her. "Tell me to stop and I will."

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" A cool, bored voice demanded. Bill Compton looked up from the sobbing blonde to see a gorgeous girl staring him down from the gate of Rosenfont Hall.

"Oh… I, uh, was," Bill stammered at her beauty and blushed.

"Getting the fuck away from my property?" the girl finished for him coldly. Her blue eyes flashed like sunlight gleaming off a sheet of ice.

Bill quickly picked his bag back up and sped away before the mysterious foul mouthed girl could say another word.

"Are you all right?" the girl asked once Bill had ran down the road. She came to stand in front of Sookie, and crouched to start putting things back in the other girl's bag. "Oh, this is lovely," she exclaimed as one of Sookie's earlier drawings floated from between the pages of a textbook. "Did you draw this?" she asked, holding up the picture.

Sookie nodded as she finally began to help putting away her books. When the girl tried to hand her the picture back, Sookie shook her head and pushed it against her savior's chest. _Thank you for helping me_ , she thought as she silently offered the drawing. The thought startled Sookie. When was the last time she had thought of an actual line of dialogue she wanted to share with another person? This was one of the rare instances in her daily exchanges that had nothing to do with school or responding to a yes or no question.

"Thank you," the girl smiled. Suddenly Sookie realized who the girl must be. _Pamela Northman!_ "Your face is scratched up," Pam remarked as she reached forward to brush away some gravel that clung to Sookie's skin. "Come inside. I'll clean it up." Sookie shook her head suddenly and pointed down the road. Pam raised her eyebrows, "I, uh, don't know how to ask this without sounding offensive, but are you really a mute?" Sookie nodded. "Oh, well, that…," Pam paused. Could mutes still make noises when they were in pain? "I can call your house for you," she offered instead. "Please, your face is bleeding."

Sookie allowed Pam to help her up, and followed the girl past the gate of Rosenfont.

"What's your phone number?" Pam asked.

Sookie took out her notebook and wrote down the number. Before she handed it over, she wrote, _"Please, don't tell her about Bill."_

The last thing Sookie wanted was Gran mentioning Bill's actions to Mr. Compton like when Bill had kneaded gum into Sookie's hair. It had been a afternoon of peanut oil and smelling like Thanksgiving turkey for three days that had kept Adele Stackhouse from shearing off her granddaughter's hair at the scalp. However, smelling like she'd just come out of a deep fryer was nothing compared to the whooping Mr. Compton had given his son. Bill had come to school black and blue with his arm in a cast. He'd said he'd fallen down the stairs, but he had glared at Sookie the whole time on the bus. She'd been in first grade at the time, and she still remembered that contemptuous look. She still remembered that her tattling on him had caused that broken wrist and all those bruises. Even before she lost her voice, she vowed to never tattle again.

Pam nodded grimly at Sookie's request before dialing. As the phone rang, Pam suddenly realized she had no idea whom she would be speaking for, nor to whom she would be speaking. Sookie seemed to realize this too because she wrote, _"I'm Sookie Stackhouse,"_ on the paper next to her plea not to tell Gran about the bullying.

" _Hello?"_ a rough, old voice came over the phone.

"Hi, is this the Stackhouse residence?" Pam asked politely.

" _Yes, it is,"_ came an equally polite reply. _"How can I help you?"_

"This is Pam Northman from Rosenfont Hall. Sookie tripped in front of my house, and I invited her in for tea and a band-aid," Pam lied effortlessly. "I just wanted to let you know not to worry."

" _Why thank you!"_ Adele crowed happily, wondering if Sookie might make a new friend, and hoping to God that she did. _"If she plans to stay past dark, just let me know when to come pick her up."_

"I will," Pam assured. "Have a nice day."

" _You too, young lady,"_ Adele gushed at the display of manners.

"Thank you," Pam smiled genuinely as she hung up the phone.

Sookie stared at Pam in surprise. Not five minutes ago Pam had let two F-Bombs drop as casually as a 'please' or 'thank you!'

"So, what grade are you in, Sookie Stackhouse?" Pam asked casually. Sookie held up all ten fingers. "A sophomore? Me, too. I hope we have a class or two together."

Sookie took up her notebook again and jotted down, _"Homeroom and anatomy/physiology are the only ones I know for sure."_

"Ugh, anatomy," Pam groaned. "That's the one where we dissect things, isn't it?" She looked at her perfectly manicured nails. "I don't suppose you have a shitty subject I could compensate you for not having to put my hands inside a dead body?"

Sookie paused as she remembered the research demonstration. Playing with her pen she hesitated further to ask. Pam was just joking, right? She didn't actually want to help Sookie at all, she just wanted to get out of doing any work. Then again, Sookie was planning on doing the research herself anyway. If Pam wanted to be her spokesperson, she would happily give her credit.

" _There's a mandatory research demonstration-"_

"Fuck my life," Pam lamented as she read the first line.

" _If I do all the work, will you read the index cards to the class?"_

"Wait, you're going to do all the work on the project and dissect my frog, but all I have to do is read some index cards you're going to write for me anyway?" Pam asked. Sookie nodded earnestly. "Well, I'll need to find some more things than being your representative to pay you back, but I accept your offer."

Sookie's eyes widened; not because Pam accepted to take Sookie's guaranteed A+ in anatomy/physiology, but because she offered to pay her back. No one ever looked at Sookie's offers as more than compensation for having to spend time with her.

"For now, how about I start by cleaning that face of yours," Pam laughed as she took Sookie's hand and lead her to the kitchen. She took out a First Aid kit and quickly cleaned up Sookie's scratches. Next a soft, square bandage was taped into place and Pam began putting away the supplies. "You should be able to take that off before bed. Just be gentle when washing your face tonight." Sookie's smile easily said, _'thank you'._

The pair stood awkwardly silent for a minute before Pam cleared her throat uncomfortably and began moving about the kitchen to make some tea. "Do you have a preference in tea?" Pam asked and was delighted when Sookie shook her head 'no'. "Is jasmine tea okay?" Sookie shrugged. She didn't know anything about tea. All she knew was that Gran drank Earl Grey.

"I can be a bit dominating in conversations," Pam mentioned as she began filling the kettle, "but I've never talked to someone who couldn't talk back."

Sookie remained self-consciously standing in the middle of the kitchen while Pam zipped around her making little sandwiches and opening packages of what looked like hard cookies. "Our mother loved tea time. When we were living in England, she fell in love with the idea, and it sort of carried on even after we left. My brothers and I still have afternoon tea every day."

A pang struck harshly at Sookie's heart. Pam had brothers. It sounded like they liked her. She wondered what it was like to have a brother that wanted to spend time with her.

"Oh, is that silly?" Pam asked in embarrassment. Sookie shook her head. "You looked upset at the idea of tea time."

How could Sookie even begin to explain the depths of her envy? It would take so many pages of her notebook to express her despair that she couldn't have such a relationship with her own brother. _Afternoon tea?_ She'd be lucky to received an afternoon talk.

"Oh no!" A voice called from the foyer as the sound of the door closing snapped through the air. "Pam's already put on the kettle!"

"Looks like we're having jasmine tea again," another voice chuckled. "Although the cucumber sandwiches taste better with it than that chai crap you make us drink."

"You just have a resistance to being happy," the first man teased.

"And you have an unhealthy obsession with cinnamon," the second man answered.

"Guys, we have a guest for tea time," Pam called as she brought the tray of crunchy cookies and fresh sandwiches out to a rather quaint, round table. _Whoa, they do take tea time serious!_ Sookie thought as she saw the soft, floral printed table cloth dressing the rich mahogany table. _Gran would melt over this set-up._

"Oh, hello there," a man about her height with short brown hair waved merrily before accepting the tray his sister was handing him. "I'm Godric Northman. Pleasure to meet you."

Sookie's face blushed softly at his smile. It brought another ache. These people didn't know just how crazy she was yet. This generous and kind greeting would not continue for long. _Oh well, it will make for a nice memory,_ she reasoned with an air of contentment.

"I'm Eric Northman," Sookie had to look way, way up as another striking blond stood before her. The former pink stain of her cheeks transformed into a radiating glow as she looked up at the giant. He was tall, lean, and had an artful array of golden strands of hair. "What happened here?" he touched Sookie's jawline just below where her bandage stopped. His touch made her heart pound briefly against her ribs. _What the heck was that, 'ba-dump'!?_

"Some asshole smashed her face into the ground right in front of our gate," Pam huffed, and Sookie's face tore away from Eric's touch to gape at Pam. _I thought it was our secret!_ "Oh, I'll keep the secret from your mother, but no way is he not getting a beating from my brother at some point!"

Sookie grabbed her notebook and wrote, _"Grandmother. My parents are dead."_

Pam grimaced apologetically, "I'm sorry. Ours are gone too. They died at the end of last school year." Sookie's hand went to her mouth, and Pam could read the condolences in her eyes. "It's all right. Well, as all right as it can be. We're getting right along, and Godric agreed to stay with us until Eric and I finish high school and start college. It won't be so terrible."

Eric watched the two girls a moment and stared back and forth between them and the notebook before asking, "Does she not speak?"

"No, she doesn't," Pam sighed. "So let's help out by giving her 'yes' or 'no' questions until we get to know her better."

"Would you mind telling us her name then, Pam?" Godric sighed.

"It's Sookie Stackhouse," Pam smiled.

"A pleasure then, Sookie," Godric pulled a chair from the table. "Have a seat, won't you?"

Nervously, Sookie accepted her chair and sat rigidly as a teapot and four delicate teacup and saucers came to the table. Sookie watched as the siblings bustled around her in preparation for their afternoon tea.

Finally all were seated, and Sookie was surprised to be quickly addressed.

"So," the handsome, blond brother looked at her curiously, "Stackhouse? That's one of the two houses up the street, isn't it?" Sookie nodded that he was correct. "I've been up here for the last few weeks getting things cleaned up and moved in, and heard a bit about the local families." Sookie gave him as pleasant of a smile as she could manage. When he returned it, she was surprised. People usually gave her a weird look when she smiled.

Thankfully, Sookie was taken out of the limelight as Godric announced, "Eric picked out his car." Godric's snicker made Eric roll his eyes.

"Is it a Corvette?" Pam teased.

Eric's eyes went glossy the way Jason's glazed at the car dealership when he saw the fully loaded Chevy Tahoe. Of course Jason had ended up with a small Ford Ranger instead, but he had been grateful to have earned enough to buy even that.

"It's an Acura Integra GS-R," Godric laughed, knowing that his brother had despised driving his Jeep for the past month after having driven all the way down from New York.

Sookie's teacup rattled. She knew little about cars, but she did know that the new Acura was easily over $20,000. _That's more than most of Bon Temps makes in a year…_ On top of that, the Northmans had not only bought Rosenfont Hall, but were restoring it.

Godric smiled at Sookie's shaking teacup, "Yes, Sookie, we are quite wealthy." Shyly, Sookie set her teacup back down so as not to distract the others with its clinking. The china alone probably could buy Jason's Ranger. "Rosenfont, however, has belonged to our mother's family for generations. She was a Beauchéne before she married our father." Sookie's jaw drooped a bit. The Beauchénes were famous, but it was thought the last of them had died five years ago when Lady Margarette Beauchéne passed away. She had been like Bon Temps Royalty. Gran had even come to Rosenfont on several occasions with care packages the last couple years Margarette had been alive. No one had really known what became of Alice Beauchéne, and Margarette had been rather tight lipped about her daughter's whereabouts.

"Grandmother certainly let the place go quite a bit those last few years," Eric sighed. "It took me all summer to strip and refinish the woodwork. Then I had to patch all the plaster after the electrician updated the wiring. I must have driven to and from Shreveport thirty times this summer. Too bad Bon Temps doesn't have a hardware store worth a damn. I might have actually gotten a chance to meet some locals that way."

 _He did the refinishing himself!?_ Sookie felt faint. The Northmans were not only cultured, wealthy and astute, but comfortable with physical labor as well!?

"Our father was a Lieutenant in the United States Air Force," Eric smiled at Sookie's shocked expression. "When he married our mother, they agreed that they didn't want their children growing up with money. Don't get me wrong, they spoiled us rotten at Christmas and birthdays. Especially Pam-"

"Hey!" The sister protested sharply.

"But they still made us earn everything the rest of the year," Eric finished as though Pam hadn't interrupted. "Please, enjoy your tea," he gestured, "while my sister tells me about some boy I will be beating the crap out of some time this week." Sookie's face paled. "Just kidding!" Eric grinned devilishly, and it made Sookie uncertain if he were kidding or not.

"Eric will be finishing his Senior year at your school," Godric explained. "Are you a sophomore like Pam?" Sookie nodded, even though she was only missing a single credit to be considered a Junior. "I am glad she will start school tomorrow knowing someone already. We have been unpacking this whole time because Eric came down early to start the restorations. He only just finished the patching and painting last week and then helped the movers bring all of our stuff in. It's been a mad scramble ever since." There was a very natural pause as he took a sip of his tea, and Sookie quickly took a gulp of her own to maintain the pacing. "Do you do well in school?" Sookie nodded slowly as if not wanting to brag. "Pam only does well in Home Ec. and literature classes."

"Be fair!" Pam whined. When her brothers looked at her with raised eyebrows, she mumbled, "I do well in orchestra too."

"Too bad Bon Temps doesn't have an orchestra," Eric sighed. "Pam plays the viola."

"I was surprised she wanted to play something that touches her face since she's so obsessed with her make-up being perfect," Godric smiled over his teacup at Pam. The younger sister huffed at her brother's comment, but still took ladylike sips from her own cup.

Dazzled by the refined family, Sookie tentatively took up her own cup once more and tried to mimic their elegance. She knew she must look like a chicken caught in a fox's jaws, but she still tried to look normal.

"Stackhouse," the girl's eyes flashed on the middle brother, and that scorching blush returned at his blue eyes, "that's the farmhouse on the northern fork in the road, right?" Sookie nodded. "We've never met them. Growing up, we really only visited Grandmother at Rosenfont for Christmas, Thanksgiving or Easter when we could. Our father's responsibilities at the airbase didn't offer many opportunities to visit for long. Even though our roots are in Bon Temps on our mother's side, this town is still a stranger to us."

"Maybe you could give us a tour?" Godric suggested warmly.

Sookie thought for a moment about what sort of tour she could give them. There were only a handful of places that were off the beaten path that she knew about, but they were all fishing holes and hunting hides.

 _There's always,_ Sookie stopped that thought immediately before it could finish. She would never be able to go back to the old willow tree that she had spent her summer days in the boughs with a book or a tape player. She remembered laying at the crest of the hill just outside the shadows of the tree, and letting the sunlight hold her. She missed that tree, but the hill it lived on overlooked the crash sight that Sookie had murdered her parents at. Sookie could never go back there again.

"Sookie?" the girl started at Godric's concerned voice, and her face adopted a shy, apologetic look. "You went somewhere just now," he teased.

"Does that mean you'll show us some places?" Pam asked.

Slowly, Sookie nodded in agreement. There were a few fishing spots that had beautiful scenery. Even if no one here was in to fishing, they could still appreciate the beauty of the area. That was what Bon Temps truly had to offer-beauty.

The sprinkling of homes kept vibrant and beautiful by Southern Pride, and the dark but undeniable history that peppered them with scandal. Rosenfont Hall was special for the area because it was erected shortly after the civil war. It was the only plantation in Bon Temps that had never owned slaves, and because of that had a rather shaky ground among the community. Some spited the Beauchéne family for being the first plantation to pay its workers fair wages despite the color of their skin. Others in the community celebrated the new family for the same exact reason. There had been many fires and threats, but Rosenfont Hall prevailed. It was one of three plantations still relatively intact, and the only one that was still owned by the original family.

As afternoon tea concluded, Sookie moved to help clear the settings, and received immediate dismissal by Eric.

"Thank you, but you are Pam's guest. Godric and I will clear," he politely declined.

Faltering for a moment, Sookie was taken by surprise when Pam grabbed her wrist and hauled her toward the sweeping staircase. "Come on! I want to show you my room!" Pam crowed, excited to finally show off her crowning achievement since moving to the South.

Sookie was still dazed by her sudden ascension to the second floor, but that sensation transformed into one of awe when Pam flung open her bedroom door. Pausing in the doorway, Sookie took a moment to appreciate the splendor before she stepped inside.

Pam's room was a soft pink reserved for newborn baby girls, but with the dark walnut accents and gold filigree; the room was one of regality. Her viola case leaned artfully against her vanity, and Sookie felt drawn to the instrument.

"Would you like me to play for you?" Pam offered sweetly upon seeing Sookie's focused gaze. "Since the high school doesn't have an orchestra, I'll need someone to play in front of!"

Sookie nodded slowly as Pam picked up the case to lay on her bed and extract her viola. She sat at her vanity, watching herself in the mirror as if it were just as important to look gorgeous playing her instrument as it was to look gorgeous the other remaining hours of the day.

There was a tension in the air just before the bow caressed the strings. It was lower than Sookie anticipated, but she quickly remembered that the viola and the violin weren't supposed to sound identical. There was a richness to the viola that the violin could not match. If the violin was meant to pierce your heart with emotion, then the viola was created to massage and calm you into accepting and experiencing that emotion.

"Beau," Sookie's voice emitted before her throat closed like an iron gate around the syllable and choked out the rest of the word. This was only the third or fourth time Sookie could recall that she managed to utter a syllable that wasn't brought on by injury. As always, the involuntary sound made her heart race and throat close. Pam stopped playing abruptly to stare at the girl. She could have sworn she'd heard a sound come from the silent girl's lips.

 _Just a sob,_ Sookie reasoned anxiously. Sobbing and injury were the only times a noise could be brought from her mouth, and the music had been building a castle of emotion across her chest. The stone fortress had merely torn an audible cry much like Compton's assault had. Only, this time, the sound that came from her was almost… welcome.

Pam and Sookie stared at each other a long moment before Pam smiled and began putting away her viola. "Would you like to stay for dinner?" she asked.

Sookie hesitated. She really should be heading home. Pam could already tell that Sookie didn't plan on staying even before she shook her head. "I'll have Eric take you home. He's crap at cooking, so it'll save me and Godric from putting out fires." An amused smile split Sookie's lips and Pam was taken aback. Sookie's mouth had remained in a pleasant upward tilt, but it had just seemed frozen there for most of the afternoon. A grin-and-bear-it smile. Now a genuine smile of joy and amusement tugged at her lips, and it made the silent girl all the more beautiful.

"ERIC!" Pam shouted suddenly, making Sookie jump. "TAKE SOOKIE HOME!"

"FINE!" Eric yelled back, causing Sookie's head to spin. What had happened to that upperclass refinement at tea time?

"I'll walk you out," Pam offered as she ushered Sookie out of her bedroom and to the staircase. Not being swept down the stairs like she had been coming up them, Sookie took the time to appreciate the ornate detail of the spindles. Rosenfont really was a castle.

"Got your bag," Eric held up Sookie's book bag by the front door. She hugged it to her chest as she followed Eric out the door.

"See you in school tomorrow, Sookie!" Pam called with a wave.

Pam was presented with another of Sookie's beautiful smiles just as Eric opened the passenger door of his new car. "You're my first passenger!" he announced to her. Sookie's grin turned nervous. "In this car," he explained with a chuckle. "I've driven people around before. Hell, I've driven in New York City. I think I can handle some empty country roads!"

Sookie relaxed as Eric made his way to the driver's side, and she quickly buckled her seatbelt.

"I hope we're not too talkative for you. Is it just as frustrating for you when people assume they know how you feel?" Eric asked as he opened the door to lean in and push the seat back. His brother was so much shorter, it was comical.

Sookie looked at Eric curiously and drew a question mark in the air.

Eric gave her a rueful smile, "Whenever I'm quiet, everyone assumes I'm in a foul mood. Does that happen to you?" Sookie shook her head. "It must be nice to have time to yourself in your own head without others thinking the worst." Sookie smiled, but it wasn't the one of joy she had worn moments ago. "It must be lonely, too." She lifted her shoulders casually as Eric finally climbed into his seat. "Would you like to ride with us in the mornings? You can walk up to the house instead of the bus stop and I'll drive you to school."

 _Jason would hate that._ Sookie knew her brother would be jealous. He only drove his truck to work and not school now because he said he was saving on gas. Sookie knew it was because Gran would make him drive Sookie to school now that they were in the same building. _But if I have my own ride, he can start driving his truck again. Maybe that will make him happy?_ Maybe he would even start driving Bill to school again and Bill would let down on some of the bullying!

Sookie nodded cautiously.

"Great! I'll see you in the morning then!" Eric beamed as he pulled out of the driveway and down the road. In a moment they were turning onto the northern fork and reached her driveway. "This is some nice land. Very _Little House on the Prairie_ ," Eric teased lightly as they bounced up the gravel driveway. "You need your driveway re-leveled."

Sookie nodded in agreement, but it wasn't in the funds at the moment. The old wooden boards of the house needed a new coat of paint before the wood started weakening.

When they pulled up to the farmhouse, Sookie was surprised when Eric hopped out from his seat and jogged to her door. "My mother was from here," he reminded Sookie. "I know about Southern Gentlemen and manners."

Sookie accepted his hand that he offered and a new flame grew under her cheeks as their fingers touched. His hand was so warm. It spread heat all the way up her elbow and into her chest. Her skin tingled and her scalp prickled with the spike in her blood pressure. This man was bad for her heart!


	2. Chapter 2

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Thanks for your amazing response to this new story, guys! I really appreciate it, and can't wait to read your future reviews as you watch the characters grow! I'm planning on updating every Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. It mostly depends on my work schedule, but I'll do my best to stick to Tuesday nights so you aren't checking your emails too often._

 _Also, please keep in mind that I'm back to self-editing. Anyone that followed me from_ Catalyst _has seen the results of doing my own editing. It's not terrible, but it could always be better. Anyway, with all that out of the way- please enjoy!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Two: First Steps Toward Forgiveness**

"You made a friend!" Adele crowed excitedly all through the night. "And you are going to be riding with her to school in the morning? That's fantastic, Sookie! Jason, maybe they can give you a ride too?"

Jason paused before smiling, "Actually, I got a raise at work, so I'll be able to start driving Bill and me to school again."

"Why don't you drop your sister off at Rosenfont in the morning then? Save her that walk-"

Sookie shook her head violently at the suggestion and scrambled for her notebook. _"I like to walk,"_ she insisted by underlining the words three times.

"Alright, alright," Adele sighed. How she wished Sookie and Jason could get along.

{†}

Sookie turned several times in front of her mirror the next morning. Pam had looked so beautiful yesterday, and Sookie didn't want to embarrass her when they got out of the car at school. It must be hard being the new kid, and she didn't want to handicap Pam on her first day of making friends. Maybe if she didn't get in the way, Pam would still talk to her every so often after she met everyone else and made real friends.

"You look lovely, Dear," Adele smiled as she peeked into Sookie's room. "Are you going to wear those shoes?" She pointed at Sookie's white Keds. "It gives you a very youthful look."

 _Youthful,_ Sookie faltered. She'd be seeing Eric today too. What if he saw the way she was dressed and thought she looked childish? _What does it matter? He just sees me as the girl who is helping his sister,_ Sookie reminded herself and didn't bother trying to search for a different pair of shoes.

Picking up her book bag, Sookie kissed her gran goodbye and began her six-minute walk up the road. Halfway there, the impulse to run the rest of the way got to be too much, and she clung to her shoulder straps as she sprinted up the road.

"Morning, Sookie!" Pam called as Sookie caught her breath walking up the drive. "Jeez, did you run here? You're all red!" she teased. "I'll be ready in a couple of minutes!" With that, Pam darted back up the stairs. Sookie thought for a moment and realized that Pam's window overlooked the driveway. She had seen Sookie coming and ran downstairs to greet her. _Wow._ Sookie wasn't sure what sort of emotion that realization brought. All she knew was that she liked it.

"Morning, Sookie," Eric waved as he came from the kitchen to the front entryway. "Pam will only be another two hours." Sookie's eyes widened, but Eric laughed, "I'm exaggerating. She takes a lot of pride in her looks. I'd call her vain, but I know her too well." No, it was far more than mere vanity that glued his sister in front of the mirror.

There was a pause in his dialogue as Eric looked Sookie up and down. Sookie squirmed at the attention, turning her toes in subconsciously out of shame for her plain white Keds.

"You look cute today," Eric smiled. Sookie wasn't sure how to take that statement, but she chose to accept it as a compliment. _Another first,_ she thought in bewilderment. _A boy called me cute!_

An upstairs door slammed shut, and Eric sighed. "Pam, on the other hand, will probably show up in stilettos and a mini skirt. I'll be bashing the guys away from her with a baseball bat all day."

That moment, Pam appeared at the top of the stairs, and Sookie's jaw slung open. In a tight, black skirt just long enough that she wouldn't get thrown out of school, Pam struck the heel of her shoe into each step as if it had offended her on a personal level. Sookie had never seen a woman walk with such conviction. Every stride, every wave of her hips seemed to be a shout of confidence.

"How do I look?" Pam spun for the pair of them once she reached the main floor. Sookie stared in continued disbelief.

"You look like I'll have my hands full keeping the boys off you," Eric grumbled.

"What do you think, Sookie?" Pam asked gently, her eyes bright and beautiful. All Sookie could offer was a nod in agreement with Eric. _Did Pam just blush?_ Sookie wondered.

Everyone grabbed their bags and headed to the car once Pam was satisfied with the reactions she had earned. Pam chose to sit in back with Sookie, telling Eric he was now, officially, their chauffeur. Eric had told her he wanted a special hat if that were the case.

As Eric pulled to the edge of the driveway, Sookie saw Jason's Ranger zip past them, kicking up rocks as an, "AAHHH-OOOOO," howled from the driver's side window.

"Rednecks," Eric grumbled as he worried over his new car's paint job. He hadn't heard any stones ping against his car's finish, but he was determined to check it when they got to school.

Pam looked over Sookie's shoulder as she scribbled in her notebook and snorted, "Apparently that red neck is Sookie's brother, Jason."

Eric grimaced before uttering an apology. Sookie gave him a thumbs up in the rearview mirror, and he smiled. "Why didn't he drive you yesterday?"

Sookie hesitated to reply. Finally, she offered, _"He only used it to get to and from work up until yesterday to save on gas."_

"So, he took the bus so that he wouldn't have to drive his little sister around?" Eric guessed accurately.

"Rude," Pam grumbled. Sookie gently smiled at her new acquaintance as if she were assuring Pam that she didn't mind her own brother's avoidance of her.

It was a short drive to school, but Pam and Eric's joking nature made Sookie wish that school was further away. She wanted to listen to them poking fun at each other a while longer. The quiet girl wanted to catch Eric's eye in the rearview mirror a few more times. If these memories would have to tide her over until graduation, she wanted a few more of them. In just fifteen short minutes, Eric and Pam would start meeting the other students, and this brief but beautiful experience would have to end.

"Would you like to have afternoon tea with us again, Sookie?" Pam offered. "We could do our homework together afterward." Sookie nodded enthusiastically but was already preparing herself for a cancellation. "If you want… We could do this every day after school."

Eric glanced in the mirror at his sister and noted the soft pink on her cheeks. Sookie grinned and nodded again, but the brother felt a pang in his heart. He wished Pam could read his mind. He would have warned her that her crush was straight. Eric would have tried to explain that Sookie had no idea that Pam was flirting with her.

The rest of the car ride, Pam pressed close to Sookie to read her responses. When they arrived at school, Sookie hopped out first, and then Pam climbed out behind her.

"I hope we have a lot of classes together. Will you show us to the office so we can get all our papers?" Pam gushed, not seeming to notice that the students climbing off the bus were looking at them all in surprise. Though many of them had been made aware that new students would be starting that day, no one had expected them to show up in an expensive car with _Crazy Sookie_ of all people!

Sookie led her new friends to the front office and patiently waited for them to finish up with the vice principal and receive their schedules. Eric was grateful when Sookie pointed out where several of his classes were on their walk to homeroom. She and Pam waved goodbye to Eric before heading to Mrs. Fleure's room.

Pam and Sookie's homeroom teacher paused when she saw the pair walk into her class. The new girl greeted the teacher and specifically asked if she could sit next to Sookie.

Katherine Fleure gawked openly at the new student's request. A realization struck her, and Katherine couldn't help but chuckle _._ It made complete sense that the new girl would try and warm up to the social outcast. That way, it would be easier to convince Sookie to help her with homework, or perhaps do it for her. This realization eased some of Katherine's concern. After all, what sort of teacher would she be if she had misjudged Sookie Stackhouse?

When the bell rang to begin homeroom announcements, Katherine called Pam up to introduce herself.

"I'm Pam Northman," Pam stated in a rather professionally cold way as if she were used to these sorts of presentations and didn't think much of them. "I've just moved here from New York City with my older brothers." Pam looked at the teacher for some prompting. Every teacher always wanted to know something different, and Pam didn't have the interest to guess or overshare.

"What are some things you enjoy doing?" Katherine asked nicely.

"I enjoy sewing replicas of designer dresses since my allowance prevents me from purchasing the real thing. I like getting my hair and nails done. I hate small talk," Pam finished.

"She's sitting next to the right person, then," a kid in the third row snorted.

"I also like the new friend I made yesterday," Pam gestured to Sookie, making the normally unnoticed girl blush. "After moving around a lot and ending up in a large city the past two years, it was refreshing to make a friend who listens and doesn't just politely smile until it's her turn to talk."

"You'd get better responses from a wall!" Mark Thompson shouted, making the fellow students laugh openly.

"Sookie says plenty!" Pam snapped icily, making the class go silent. The silence only lasted a minute because several students started to giggle at Pam's unconfirmed declaration.

Without bothering to say another word, Pam gracefully swept through the aisle back to her desk. The smile she gave Sookie as she sat down surprised her. Sookie had expected Pam to deflate or feel embarrassed or uncertain. Instead, a cocky smirk tugged at the corner of her mouth as if she had just alienated herself from the rest of the class on purpose.

When homeroom ended, Sookie rose to show Pam to her next class. As they walked out the door, Sookie held out her notebook with a prewritten question, _"Why did you do that?"_

Pam smiled at her friend, "Because anyone who can't see how awesome you are will never be a friend of mine."

Sookie's eyes widened at Pam's statement, but before she could scribble some weak form of thanks, Pam disappeared into her math class.

"Sookie!" Eric waved from down the hall, and Sookie was not surprised to see a flock of the prettiest teens in all of Bon Temps following him. Even Dawn Green, a girl who frequently chased after Jason, was staggering behind Eric like a lovesick calf. Sookie returned his wave politely as she headed to her class. It wouldn't be good for Eric's newly forming reputation to be seen acting more than courteous toward her. She felt bad enough that Pam had just sabotaged herself. She would hate if Eric did so inadvertently.

At lunchtime, Sookie was excited to have someone sit with her finally. Pam told her about her first four classes, and they went over the second half of the new student's schedule. They were both happy to see they had Short Stories together as well as their Anatomy/Physiology class, but most of Sookie's classes were for Juniors, so she rarely crossed paths with Pam.

Sookie showed Pam the drawings she had done throughout the first half of school, and Pam fawned over them. It was exciting to have someone other than Gran with whom to share her art. Mrs. Talbit, the art teacher, always complimented Sookie's work, but Sookie had a sinking suspicion that the teacher hated all of it. Sookie understood though. There was a giant gap between passion and talent, but drawing was only a hobby for Sookie. There was little passion or talent with which to begin in her case.

For the first time in eight years, Sookie got to know someone. She listened to Pam talk about the different places she and her brothers had grown up. She got to answer questions about the things she liked, and Pam didn't get impatient with having to wait for Sookie to write out the answers. Pam didn't seem annoyed at having to read Sookie's responses.

That funny feeling was building in Sookie's chest again. It was stronger than when Pam had greeted her that morning. This time, she could discern the emotion that made her heart swell and her throat ache. It was affection.

Before Sookie knew it, lunch had ended without her usual trip to the library, and she was walking to English class with Pam.

"Does this school only have one lunch period?" Pam asked curiously. Sookie nodded which made Pam frown. "Huh, I wonder where Eric was?"

{†}

Eric's first day at school was panning out as expected. Girls were practically throwing their underwear at him, and he had to admit it was nothing new. Ever since he had shot up to 6'3" and his proportions evened out, Eric had no issues getting dates. His brother had warned him about leaving a trail of broken hearts across the world, but it was so hard to choose! It was like going to a candy store and being told he could only have one type of candy. Besides, with the constant uprooting his father's career caused, Eric hadn't seen the point of making any commitments to a single girl. They would be separated eventually and would move on with their lives. He figured if there were a girl worth pining for, he would know her when he met her.

"You must be one of the people fixing up Rosenfont, right?" A guy from his Economics class smiled politely. He had a darker blond hair than his own but was a full head shorter than Eric. He didn't seem intimidated by Eric's looks or height which was refreshing. "I'm Jason. I live up the street from you."

Eric's mood transformed upon learning he was talking to Sookie's brother, losing his previous relief at meeting a man that wasn't threatened by him. Managing to keep a pleasant smile on his mouth, Eric accused, "Ah, the one who sped down the road this morning and shot rocks up at my new car. I remember."

Jason flinched before giving an embarrassed laugh, "Sorry about that. I was excited to be driving to school again."

"Now that you have an alternate excuse not to drive your sister?" Eric asked in a no-nonsense drawl. Jason's body tightened slightly, but no outward movement was visible. This relaxed manner of scolding was far too reminiscent of his gran's method, but Jason was not rattled by it coming from a stranger.

Eric was surprised when Jason smirked rather than recoiled at the accusation. "You'll understand after a while spending time with her. You've known her less than a day. I've known Sook her whole life."

"Sisters are a pain in the ass," Eric replied lazily, unaffected by Jason's warning. "There's no getting past that, but I haven't seen a single boy here with a messed up face, or even with his tail tucked between his legs from a brother's fury."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jason demanded.

"It means," Eric sighed, "that even though my sister drives me up the wall, I'd never let someone smash her face into the ground. I might ignore Pam from time to time. I might refuse to drive her around like a chauffeur. Hell, I might shove her into a wall every so often when she gets particularly annoying, but that's my god damned right as her big brother. No one else's." With that, Eric turned toward his next class and left Jason standing in the hallway with students pushing to get past his frozen figure.

Jason's face reddened the more he thought about Eric's accusations, and finally, he began to head to his class. He didn't like the idea an outsider was telling him how to treat his sister. He didn't appreciate that said stranger was also accusing him of being a terrible brother. After all, if the new kid had any idea that Sookie was the reason they were orphans, then he might not be so quick to judge.

Still all through his morning classes, Jason couldn't help but think about the less obvious points of Eric's scolding. Eric picked on his sister. Jason flat out refused to acknowledge Sookie existed. Eric might give his sister a shove from time to time. Jason allowed others to push at Sookie. Jason wondered if he could find some peace if he just let out his frustration from time to time instead of trying to find satisfaction in others doing it. It was possible all his hatred toward Sookie was the result of never letting his feelings out. After all, why couldn't she be annoying and lovable? Why did he find it impossible to accept that she lost her parents too? Why was he determined to believe it was her fault?

The remainder of the morning felt like mud around him. It was slow and unpleasant to sit around wading through the murk. When the lunch bell sounded, Jason went to find Bill as he usually did before heading to the cafeteria. Only, he wasn't alone.

"I've been looking for you all morning," Eric was grinning down at Bill.

"What for?" Bill asked, annoyed to be stopped by the new kid even if he was so much bigger than him.

"I heard you're the one who messed with Sookie Stackhouse yesterday. Scratched and bruised her face."

"She told you that?" Bill snorted.

"No," Eric shook his head, "my sister mentioned it, and it wasn't difficult finding out who gets off the bus with the Stackhouses."

"Everyone messes with Sookie," Bill replied dismissively. "Her brother doesn't even care that we do." Jason felt a jolt of guilt hearing the truth so plainly spoken.

"Then you can be the one to tell _everyone_ that if her brother's not going to do anything about it, I will. Let them know anything they do to her; I'll do to them twice as bad," Eric informed.

"Yeah right-"

Eric grabbed the side of Bill's head and smashed his face into a nearby locker. "Yeah. Right," Eric told him as the younger teen looked up in stunned disbelief. "I'll take it easy on you today because you had no prior warning. That was your warning."

"Eric Northman!" Mrs. Davies, the physics teacher, howled. "Are you fighting!? On your first day!?"

"Yes, M'am," Eric nodded. Mrs. Davies blinked back in surprise.

"Well then… Go to the principal's office!" She pointed down the hall, still astounded by her new student's unrepentant response.

"Yes, M'am," Eric readily agreed. He spent his lunch period writing lines and a formal letter of apology to Bill Compton. The message read like this:

 _~Dear Bill Compton,_

 _My sincerest apologies for taking it upon myself to settle a personal matter on school property. Please, forgive my abrupt actions here at school, and be assured that it will never happen here again. I would have rather disputed over the treatment of others privately. I guarantee that I will never try to debate with you so publicly ever again._

 _Sincerely,_

 _Eric Northman~_

{†}

Sookie squeezed into the back of Eric's car with Pam and smiled as their driver waited to exit his parking space.

"Where were you during lunch? We didn't see you," Pam commented as she pulled her seatbelt across his chest.

"Principal's office," Eric casually replied as he weaved his way through the parking lot.

"On the first day?" Pam demanded sharply. "Godric's going to kill you."

Eric snorted, "Yeah, sure. I didn't get suspended or anything. It wasn't even really a fight. I just smashed that Compton kid's head against a locker."

"Ooooh," Pam leaned forward excitedly, "did he cry?"

"I'm concerned about how badly you want to hear that he cried," Eric laughed as they started for home.

Pam let loose a cackle that had Sookie thinking she wasn't quite sure what sort of friend she had made. When Pam finished laughing at Bill's expense, she flopped back into her seat and looked at Sookie. "So," she smiled, "want to show us some of your haunts when we finish afternoon tea?" Sookie gave her friend a tentative nod.

Afternoon tea was just as lively today. Godric told them about some of the renovation work he had completed that day. Apparently, he wouldn't be starting his next semester of college until January because he had wanted time to get everyone settled into their new home before getting distracted with school. Sookie had used her notebook to ask what he was studying. When he told her he was studying psychology, he did not miss the way Sookie's body tightened.

"I'm only in my sophomore year of college, Sookie," Godric laughed as they began cleaning up the tea set. "I'm nowhere near being able to analyze anyone."

 _"Even veterans of the field can't figure me out,"_ Sookie scrawled out and held up for her new friends to see. They all chuckled, and it made Sookie smile. No one else tried making light of her circumstances. Mostly they treated her like a ghost rather than acknowledge it.

"Have you always been unable to talk?" Pam asked curiously.

Sookie shook her head and wrote, _"I lost my voice when I was eight. I was in a car accident and then a coma for two weeks following it. When I woke up, I couldn't speak."_

"Was there damage to your throat?" Eric asked curiously.

Sookie shook her head again, _"They think the brain swelling might have something to do with it. Once the swelling went down, I should have been able to talk again, but I couldn't. Now the psychiatrists think I might have some mental block? They said I should be able to start talking eventually, but don't know when. One said it would happen when I was ready for it to happen."_

"What does it feel like when you try to speak?" Pam inquired.

Sookie paused to think a moment. Finally, she decided to give her best shot at describing the feeling. _"On a few occasions, I've gotten some sound out, but it's always involuntary. I wasn't trying to talk. When it happens, though, my throat tightens like it's seized up. When I truly try to force out a word, it feels uncomfortable, like what I guess an asthma attack would feel like, and sometimes my face starts to go numb. If I just move my mouth like I'm talking, I don't get that seized up feeling, but if I try and put sound with it, everything goes crazy."_

Her new friends read her explanation at different speeds. Godric took the longest, seeming to interpret her description more deeply than his siblings.

"Is there any reason you haven't bothered to learn how to sign?" Pam asks. "Eric knows sign language."

 _"No one around here uses sign language. It's easier just to write. Besides, I don't usually have so much to say,"_ Sookie confessed, beginning to feel uncomfortable, but also grateful at the same time. They weren't trying to fix her voice. They weren't telling her to fight something she couldn't comprehend.

Sookie remembered how one of her doctors had told Gran not to give into her writing rather than speaking; to not even read a single one of her messages. They had said that maybe if she wanted something badly enough, she'd be able to muscle through the block between her brain and her mouth.

After only two days, Gran had sobbingly read every little note Sookie had made. She said that even though she missed hearing her granddaughter's voice, she couldn't bear to ignore her.

Sookie didn't tell her new friends about that, and the questions about her muteness ebbed into a natural silence as they finished cleaning up from afternoon tea. Finally, all three of them looked excitedly to Sookie, wondering what hidden spot she would show them.

Together, the four of them piled into Godric's jeep, and Sookie would tap Godric's right or left shoulder if he needed to make a turn. It was a simple way to give directions, and soon they were bouncing along back country roads that weren't roads, but places where the grass had been worn down into two dirt lines. It only took about eight minutes to arrive at a small lake whose glossy surface was gently caressed by drooping willow branches. Sookie looked shyly at her new friends and pantomimed casting a line. All three understood that she liked to come here to fish.

"It's very picturesque," Eric commented as they wandered closer to the water. "Wow, that water is a lot clearer than I thought it would be. You can almost see down to the bottom!"

Sookie nodded with a grin, pointing at the fish coasting beneath the water's surface.

"Do you fish often, Sookie?" Godric asked. Sookie nodded brightly. "Maybe the three of us could come here this weekend?" Sookie held up three fingers curiously. "You, me and Eric. Pam would want nothing to do with fishing."

"I could come and just read a magazine or do my nails," Pam pouted, not wanting to be excluded from hanging out with her new friend.

Sookie scrambled to open her notebook, _"If we catch anything, we can bring it home to my Gran. She makes amazing fried catfish!"_

"That sounds wonderful, but what if we don't catch anything?" Godric laughed.

 _"She'd still be happy to cook for all of us. Is Sunday okay? We could go after I get home from church,"_ Sookie offered.

"I'm in," Eric agreed.

"Me too," said Godric.

"Me three," Pam raised her hand.

Sookie smiled as they wandered around the old fishing hole, already wishing for the weekend.

{†}

 _She's sixteen! She's sixteen! She's- Oh, God, look anywhere but her legs!_ Eric frantically thought as Sookie jogged ahead of him with her fishing pole slung over one shoulder and a tackle box and five-gallon bucket bouncing in her other hand. He and Godric trailed behind with a cooler full of ice, and Eric was appreciative to see her body in motion.

Sookie Stackhouse had legs like a runner. Thick, toned, tan and tempting. In her Daisy Dukes and the flannel shirt that was tied off just above her bellybutton, she looked like she could give Catherine Bach a run for her money. _She's sixteen!_ Eric reminded himself again as she bent down to fill her bucket with some of the lake's water. He and Godric set down the large cooler of ice that Sookie had insisted they needed. Eric immediately stole an ice cube and pressed it against the back of his neck. _How am I supposed to stay composed looking at that?_ He wondered as Sookie's backside tensed with the effort of drawing the full bucket of water back out of the lake.

Mercifully, they were soon all sitting around the edge of the lake, and casting their lines into the water. Pam had brought a folding chair and a recently assigned book they were expected to read for Short Stories. The new student had been disappointed to find it was a story she had already read but decided it was worth a second go.

Sookie noted the giant splash and short distance from the shore that both Godric and Eric had cast. She looked at both men on either side of her and gave her wrist a little flick. Both men flicked their wrists, much sharper than was necessary, and their bobbers skipped over the top of the lake. She smiled to herself as she realized they had little or no experience fishing.

Turning to Godric, Sookie cinched her pole into an old rod anchor a previous fisherman had left intact. She took the oldest brother's fishing pole and quickly reeled it in. Taking his hand in hers, she put the reel back in his hands and helped him recast his line. She demonstrated the proper way to flick the string for slack and then moved on to Eric.

The height difference between herself and Eric made the demonstration far more difficult, and even with Eric crouching down, Sookie still had to press her body flush against his own to fix his cast. As the lesson kept their bodies squeezed together, Eric felt Sookie's breath quicken. He felt her body grow hotter than before. Contemplating their position, Eric was surprised by a sharp tug on the pole that brought him back to reality. He started to crank the reel and began spinning it in. Just as he was about to give a yank, Sookie's hand was there, guiding his speed and strength. In no time, a thick, slippery bluegill broke the surface of the water.

"You caught the first fish!" Eric exclaimed happily.

Sookie smiled brightly and shook her head. _"No, you did,"_ she mouthed at him.

Eric's face reddened, before he uttered, "I've never actually caught a fish before."

 _"I know,"_ Sookie smirked. Taking his catch into her hand, she showed him how to release the hook from the fish's mouth. Eric and Godric both observed her technique. With practiced grace, Sookie held down the bluegill's dorsal fin, pushed the hook back into its throat and with a gentle tilt, the hook released.

"You made that look so easy," Eric commented in awe as she chucked the bluegill into the bucket.

Sookie looked up at Eric with one of her sweet smiles before handing the pole back to him and taking up her own. Quickly, she reeled hers in, changed out her hook to a much larger and intimidating one and speared the bluegill onto her line. Eric watched in admiration and a little disgust as she showed no mercy to the small fish.

In no time, Sookie was reeling in catfish and chucking them into the cooler. Both Godric and Eric could only stand and marvel at her. Their fishing lines managed to pull in nothing other than bluegill, and Sookie took from their catches to bait their actual goal. When Godric finally caught a catfish of his own, he was disappointed when Sookie sympathetically expressed that it was too small to keep.

After a few hours, Pam looked up from her book to stare longingly at Sookie. She was having so much fun with Eric, and it seemed like the only time anyone talked was when they tugged in a fish. For the first time since they met each other, Pam felt like a tag-along. Still, she had no interest in fishing. She'd eat what they caught without any outward complaint, but she'd be damned if she had to put her hands around the disgusting thing while it was still alive!

By the time the afternoon sun began to sink, the group had walked away with five good-sized catfish. The cooler was hoisted proudly into the jeep, and the Northmans along with Sookie climbed in as well. They headed straight to the Stackhouse farm, prepared to meet the matron of Sookie's family.

"Hello!" Adele greeted the Northmans warmly on the porch. "Oh, bless you all, look at all those catfish!" she said as she flipped the lid of the cooler open. "Sookie, be a dear. I had Jason set up the table in the backyard. Why don't you go ahead and clean these."

Sookie nodded as she led Eric and Godric around the house to show them how to clean and filet the catches.

"Why don't you come in here with me, Dear," Adele crooned at Pam. "I think it was sweet of you to go fishing even though it's not your cup of tea. How about you help me in the kitchen instead of watching Sookie gut a bunch of fish!"

Pam felt faint, "No wonder Sookie agreed to dissect my frog for me. She must be knuckle deep in guts all the time!"

Adele chuckled, "Sookie's not faint of heart. She's just…"

"Burdened," Jason finished for his grandmother as he came into the kitchen.

"Burdened?" Pam frowned as Adele looked at her grandson in surprise. For the past eight years, Adele had heard nothing but blame spouting from Jason's lips at Sookie.

"Sook was in the same car crash that killed our parents," Jason told her as he headed toward the back door. "She thinks it was her fault. I helped her keep believing it," he announced without breaking stride.

Adele watched Jason exit the house and practically ran to the kitchen window to watch as her grandson took the knife from Sookie and began precisely explaining what she was doing to prepare the fish. Sookie was looking at her brother with the same astonishment.

"Are you alright, Mrs. Stackhouse?" Pam asked as Adele touched her lips to absorb a sob.

"Excuse me," Adele cleared her throat. "I'm sorry, I've been… praying for the day, he would finally forgive her!" An unbidden tear leaked from the older woman's eye and she quickly brushed it away. "It's not that I blame him for being upset, but I don't know if Sookie can heal without his forgiveness."

Pam paused a moment, "I'm happy for you… and Sookie. I don't know where I'd be if my brothers hated me."

Adele sighed, "Brothers can be difficult. They can make life easier, or they can make life hell."

Pam looked at Adele curiously, but when the older woman didn't explain any further, Pam didn't press on the topic. Instead, the two women got started heating oil and blending seasonings with their breading. The egg wash had a light dusting of salt and pepper, but most of the spices mixed into the flour.

"Here ya go, Gran," Jason called as he came in with a tray of prepared fish. He set it on the counter while grabbing a bar of soap. Bringing the soap bar outside, he, Eric, Godric and Sookie all washed their hands under the outdoor spigot.

Soon the house smelled of frying catfish, and once all the pieces were cooked and cooling on some paper plates, Gran cranked the stove flame to raise the oil temperature further and threw in some freshly cut potatoes.

When Sunday dinner was ready, and they placed each dish on the small dining table, Gran put out the salt and pepper before joining the teens. Gran, Sookie, and Jason all took hands, and the Northman siblings quickly joined in as Adele began to say grace.

"Lord, thank you for the blessings of this table's bounty. Thank you for bringing those who have joined us today to share in your gifts. May our hearts and stomachs always remain full. Amen."

"Amen," Jason and the Northmans chorused. At last, it was time for conversations and delicious food.

"When Sookie asked me about having you over for Sunday dinner, I realized something," Adele addressed Godric.

"What's that, M'am?" Godric asked.

"Do you three have anywhere to go for Thanksgiving?" Adele asked.

Godric shrugged, "I figured we'd just have a small dinner with just the three of us."

"Well, if you'd like, you are all welcome to come here for Thanksgiving dinner," Adele offered. "It's a real pleasure having everyone gathered around the table. My daughter and granddaughter will be here as well."

"Aunt Linda and her daughter Hadley," Jason whispered to Pam who sat next to him. "Hadley's a junkie-"

"Jason Stackhouse!" Adele interrupted him sternly.

"Hey, I'm just preparing them," Jason said unrepentantly. "Last Christmas she shot up in your bathroom and passed out on your bed. I don't think that's something you should avoid telling your guests."

"Even still, it is not appropriate dinner conversation," Adele chastised, a bit more subdued this time.

There was a small silence after the exchange, but Eric broke the elevating tension, "Sookie can really fish! I think our father took us once when Godric and I were kids."

"I've only gone twice with our father, but I remember Grandpa took me a couple of times when we visited for the holidays," Godric thoughtfully said as he tried to remember back to when Grandpa Beauchéne was still alive. "He passed away when Eric was three, so they never went together. Our father came with me once with Grandpa. I think Eric was about seven when the three of us went together."

"It doesn't sound like you ever spent much time with your father's side of the family," Adele commented carefully.

"Our father's mother abandoned him when he was a small child," Pam explained. "We have an aunt, but she ran away from her foster family, and they never saw each other again. As soon as our father turned eighteen, he joined the United States Air Force and never looked back. When they stationed him at Barksdale, he met our mom while she was at University. They knew each other two months before his transfer overseas. Mom dropped out of college, they got married, and she went with him all over the world."

"Sounds like a love story," Gran sighed.

"They loved each other very much," Godric agreed, but there was a definite bitterness behind his eyes.

Sookie saw that bitter sadness and wished that she could somehow ease it. For all of them.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Three: Stepping Up as a Big Brother**

In what felt like no time at all, the Northmans had been residents of Bon Temps for a whole two weeks. Though their popularity was hindered by their association with Sookie, no word ever got back to the silent girl's ears that they talked about her behind her back. Actually, the exact opposite seemed to happen. Instead, Sookie began hearing things about the Northmans being Sookie's bodyguards. For the first time in a long time, Sookie felt safe walking from class to class. She hadn't been body checked into a locker in those two weeks, no one had even slapped her books out of her hands, and that was usually something that occurred multiple times in a single day.

Sookie approached her locker to find two sophomore girls leaning against it having a conversation. The silent girl stood patiently waiting for them to move, even being sure to make a little movement from time to time to be noticed. It was apparent from the beginning that the two girls knew exactly what they were doing, so Sookie shoved herself between them and began putting her combination into her lock.

"Not that you would know what it's like," Maudette Pickens, a girl who sometimes tried to hang out with Jason, snarled, "but we were trying to have a conversation here!"

Sookie ignored the girl's comment and opened her locker to exchange her books for the next class. As she began to lean in, the door swung sharply at her face and struck painfully between her cheekbone and her eye. Sookie jerked back as the eye nearest the strike point immediately watered, and her locker was slammed shut the rest of the way.

"Aw, are you going to cry, Stackhouse?" Maudette's friend was now taunting. "What does it sound like when a mute girl cries?"

"What the fuck are you doing to my sister?" Sookie looked in surprise at her brother.

"Jason? We were just-" Maudette faltered, confused and concerned by Jason Stackhouse's sudden interest in his sister's welfare.

"Fucking off to class?" Jason finished for her.

Both girls fled quickly from the scene of the crime and Jason sighed as he took in the bruise already blooming near Sookie's right eye.

"You want me to go with you to the nurse?" Jason asked as he gently brushed away the tear tracks from beneath Sookie's eye.

Shaking her head Sookie mouthed shyly, _"No, thanks."_

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to stop it," Jason mumbled.

Sookie gave him a small smile and reached forward to offer his hand a squeeze. When he didn't recoil from her touch, Sookie felt her heart clench with love and gratefulness.

 _"Thank you,"_ she grinned this time. Having Jason accept her touch, her gratitude, was worth a thousand black eyes.

Jason kept an eye out for his sister while she reopened her locker and got her books for her next course. Just as he was about to head to his own class, Eric caught him in the hallway. As the taller teen approached him, looking a bit ruffled, all Jason could think about was that they would be late for class.

"Stackhouse," Eric greeted the brother of his friend, "I was wondering if you could do me a favor."

"What's that?" Jason asked impatiently. He still had to get to the other side of the school for his next course. He usually wouldn't care, but it was his worst subject and continually threatened to get him booted from the football team.

"I was hoping you could tell me if, Sookie… Might be interested in… Going to Homecoming with me?" Eric asked nervously. Jason stared unblinkingly for several seconds. "What?" Eric demanded, flustered by his rare uncertainty.

"Like… Homecoming as a friend?" Jason asked.

"Yeah. Sure," Eric fumbled further.

Unsure why Eric was being so cagey, Jason merely shrugged, "Whatever. Go ahead and ask her."

Eric grinned from ear to ear and ran off to his next class to formulate a plan for asking Sookie to Homecoming, and left Jason to stare dumbfounded after him.

Somehow, Jason was was certain Eric wanted to go to the dance with Sookie as more than just a friend. The quarter back had little time to consider this notion, though, because he finally made it to his own class and settled in for another mind-numbing lecture. He wasn't sure why, but Mrs. Fleure annoyed the hell out of him. He'd rather have had Mr. Kleever, who was stricter, but a lot more honest about the type of person he was.

Thankfully class ended without a pile of homework, and Jason was grateful to have the weekend free from one more assignment. As he made his way to lunch, he saw Eric's sister talking animatedly to her brother. Eric looked disappointed.

"-Homecoming together! Won't it be scandalous?" Pam cackled.

Jason flinched on Eric's behalf. Apparently Pam had already convinced Sookie to go stag to Homecoming with her. In a way, Jason felt sorry for Eric and Sookie. He wanted Sookie to finally have her first date…

{†}

Pam floated about her bedroom excitedly, running up dresses for herself and Sookie to wear to Homecoming together. She knew it was poor sportsmanship to corner Sookie into a date that she didn't even know was a date, but in Love, you couldn't always play by the rules!

"Hey."

Pam paused in her work to look at her door and find Eric standing there.

"Hey, yourself," she grinned at him, and Eric felt even worse about what he had come to her room to discuss.

Eric paused a moment as if he were choosing his words very carefully, "So, what kind of dresses did you design for Sookie and yourself?"

Glowing proudly, Pam brandished her sketches at Eric.

"I take it the blue one is Sookie's, and the pink one is yours?" Eric guessed, a smile tugging his lips though it could not meet his eyes. He knew Sookie would look beautiful in one of Pam's creations, he just wished she'd be beautiful next to him instead of his sister.

"You got it!" Pam nodded as she went to start pinning the fabric to her dress mannequin.

There was another long pause before her brother finally stated the knowledge that had been plaguing him for weeks, "She's not gay, Pam."

"How do you know?" Pam sing-songed, continuing her work as if her brother were not trying to shatter her hopes and dreams.

"Because," Eric paused. How could he tell her that he knew from the way Sookie blushed when their hands accidentally touched? How could he explain that the way her breathing quickened when she taught him to cast a line was all the proof he needed?

"Because she _must_ be head over heels in love with _you_?" Pam challenged as she pinned and measured. _Yes_ , Eric thought angrily, but not out of conceitedness. "Just because you're attracted to her doesn't make her straight."

"And just because you are attracted to her doesn't make her gay!" Eric crossed his arms over his chest in frustration. Sookie _had_ to be straight, otherwise, what was he supposed to do about the fact that the five minutes he stole alone with her on the car ride to her house were the best five minutes of his entire day, every day. Of course, he enjoyed the time he shared with her among classmates and siblings, but in those five minutes, he was the center of her attention. She smiled at _him_ and listened to _him_. In two weeks he'd spent just over an hour alone with her, and it just wasn't enough! Five minutes a day, it could never be enough!

"What is going on in here?" Godric came to Pam's room having heard their shouting from down the hall. The two younger siblings clamped their mouths shut. So far, Eric was the only one in the family that Pam had come out to. Their parents had never known their daughter was a lesbian before their passing, and now Pam was hesitant to let Godric in on the knowledge.

Rather than bring up the whole frustrating situation, Eric stormed out of the room and left Pam to stand awkwardly in front of their older brother.

"Well?" Godric asked, raising his eyebrows expectantly at his sister.

"There's no sense beating around the bush, I guess," she grumbled. "I'm a lesbian."

"Alright," Godric nodded in acceptance, "is Eric giving you a hard time for that?"

Pam hesitated. She hadn't expected Godric to explode over her sexual orientation, but she also hadn't expected such a smooth transition either. Her oldest brother didn't even hesitate in transferring his baby sister from the straight column to the gay column in his head. "Not exactly," she sighed. "He's not picking on me about it or anything, but we're both… interested in the same girl."

"Sookie," Godric guessed immediately.

"Don't tell me you're in love with her too!" Pam snapped in annoyance.

Godric laughed, "No, I'm not, but I definitely can see where the attraction hits you two."

"Can you?" Pam asked, bewildered by the notion her brother could already tell what she was attracted to.

"You see a girl who doesn't judge and knows what it's like not to fit in," Godric replied easily. "Eric sees a girl that could possibly want him for more than his looks. You're both infatuated with the idea of Sookie for two different reasons, but neither reason is love. That's fine. Two weeks is early for love, it should be attraction right now, and Sookie- the real Sookie- is not easily known from what I can tell."

"I convinced Sookie that she and I should go to Homecoming together since I was so new and didn't really know anyone yet," Pam confessed. "The truth is, I didn't want her to go with anyone else."

"You didn't want her to go with Eric," Godric filled in.

"Yeah," Pam bowed her head contritely.

"Is that because you know that Sookie will never be more than your friend?" Godric asked as he came into the room.

"I just wanted to dance with her. I wanted to know what that felt like before Eric took her," Pam whispered, her voice growing weaker as the emotion built a wall around her throat.

Her brother came and sat on her bed as Pam stood motionless by her tailoring dummy. "Pamela, just because she won't fall in love with you doesn't mean you should ignore the love she can give you. The love of a friend can be strong, and I think you both need it."

"It's not fair," Pam sniffled.

"No, it's not, but neither is judging someone on something they can't control," Godric told her gently. "You wouldn't want Sookie to stop being your friend just because you're gay, and you shouldn't stop being her friend just because she's straight."

"Can you tell if Sookie's straight or not?" Pam asked quietly.

Godric sighed. It was evident that she reacted more out of a desire to his brother than his sister, but there was always the possibility that Sookie was too sheltered to know how to respond to attraction toward a woman. It was a very murky area, and they definitely did not understand Sookie well enough to try and guess at her orientation.

"I don't know," he finally replied. "I get the feeling that if given a choice, Sookie would choose Eric, but that could very well be because it would be the socially acceptable choice for this area."

"So you think I shouldn't even put up a fight?" Pam demanded with a piercing glare at her brother.

"I'm saying that in this time, and in this place, you are choosing an uphill battle," Godric explained. "I'm also saying, don't ruin your friendship fighting for something that might not even be there… And don't hurt the relationship you have with your brother for the same reasons."

Pam deflated before Godric's very eyes. How was she supposed to fix any of this? Even if Eric asked Sookie to Homecoming, she would refuse because she'd already promised to go with Pam. Worse yet, Pam didn't have any male friends who she could convince to ask her!

{†}

"Hey, Sook, how's the homework coming?" Jason asked nervously as he looked up from his own books. Sookie raised her hand and shook it in a so-so gesture. Jason smiled. "I- uh, was wondering about Homecoming?"

Sookie looked up at her brother curiously and tilted her head to urge him to continue.

"Eric kinda asked me if it was alright to ask you to the dance." At Sookie's comically widening eyes, Jason chuckled. "I guess he was going to ask you at lunch, but Pam already convinced you to go stag with her?" Sookie nodded. "So, I thought maybe I could ask Pam if she'd like to go with me, and Eric can go with you? The four of us could drive there together… Y'know, it doesn't have to be a _romantic_ date. Just some brothers taking each other's sisters to a dance…"

Sookie reached for her notebook and quickly scribbled, _"Was that all the reason Eric asked if he could go with me?!"_

Jason shook his head quickly, "No way. I think he is seriously into you. He was all nervous and shy about asking me, and he doesn't look like a guy who's got any problems getting a girl."

 _"Really!?"_ Sookie demanded.

"Yes really," Jason laughed. "I think you should give it a shot, but don't let him do anything funny with you!" he ended the conversation sternly.

Sookie beamed at her brother as she crawled across the floor between them in the living room to give him a big hug. When she pulled away, her lips moved to say, _"Thank you!"_

That night, Jason felt a little restless. He'd be going over to Rosenfont Hall to ask Pam if she'd be interested in going to Homecoming with him. Usually asking a pretty girl out was no big deal for the Bon Temps High School quarterback, but this time a lot more than scoring was at stake. Though, Jason had no interest in trying to land the Northman sister.

Pam was definitely beautiful, but she was not only his sister's best friend; she was cold. That was the only way Jason could describe Pam. She put on an aura that exuded 'Keep Away' even while she was sociable. Maybe it was that the Northman family was worldly, and people from a small town found it intimidating. Perhaps it was that the Northmans were wealthy and refined while the rest of them were just a bunch of backwater hicks. Whatever the reason, Pam was probably not a sure bet to ask out.

All morning, Jason looked at the clock, wondering when it would be a suitable time to walk up the road and talk to Pam. At 9AM, he finally gave into his nerves and put on his shoes.

"Don't worry, I got all the ammunition I need to free you up for Eric," Jason patted Sookie's shoulder as he walked to the front door. "See you in a bit."

Jason could feel his sister's eyes watching him all the way up the road until he disappeared around the bend. Once he was officially alone, his worry came back tenfold.

The gate to Rosenfont Hall was open, a sign that the gate was more ornamental than functional at this time. With a few quick strides Jason was up the driveway and leaping the three steps to Rosenfont's front door to ring the bell. It was Eric who answered.

"Good morning, Stackhouse," Eric was surprised to see him. "Is everything all right?"

Jason shook his head, "Not really. I was hoping I could see Pam?"

Eric's brow creased at the request, but he opened the door further, "I'll go get her if you want to wait in the sitting room?" He gestured to the room off to the right of the foyer. Jason nodded and went to wait in the desert rose-colored room.

Everything in the sitting room was some shade of pink. Gran would have called it _mature pink_ because it lacked the bright candy tones customarily geared toward little girls. The wallpaper was a dull rose color with soft, slate stencils of flowers patterned into vines. The design was subtle but softened the dark walnut paneling that framed the wallpaper.

The furniture was also done in dark walnut and upholstered with more dusty rose patterns. Jason quickly concluded that a woman definitely designed and furnished this room.

"You wanted to see me, Stackhouse?" Jason turned to see Pam entering the sitting room. She was wearing another one of her barely legal short skirts, and a loose white blouse. Even on a Saturday, she wore classy black pumps around the house. Her hair was drawn back into a tight ponytail, and several pencils were sticking out of the point where her hair tie held them securely. Apparently, she had been working on something.

"Listen, your brother asked me yesterday if he could take Sookie to Homecoming," Jason began. "I guess you asked Sook to go stag with you before Eric could ask my sister." Pam's face reddened, but Jason somehow felt that it had nothing to do with embarrassment. She seemed upset. "I was wondering if I could take you to Homecoming so Eric could take Sookie?"

Pam turned to lean casually against the door frame, but Jason was sure it was because Pam wanted to hide her face from him. "Is that what Sookie wants? To go with Eric?" She sounded hurt.

Suddenly Jason realized what all of this was about. _Wow, a real, live lesbian!_

"You really wanted to go with her too, didn't you?" Jason asked compassionately.

"And if I did?" Pam snapped defensively.

"Then I'd say, why don't the four of us go together?" Jason offered. "Eric can have the slow dances. You can have the fast ones."

Pam looked sharply at her friend's brother, "What?"

"I hate to rain on your parade, but Sookie is straight as an arrow," Jason shrugged. "She wouldn't wanna break your heart over it though." Pam huffed at the man's bluntness. "So, do we have a deal?"

"I could have made her happy," Pam whispered.

"You can still make her happy as her friend," Jason pointed out.

Pausing for a thoughtful moment, Pam grunted, "You're not as stupid as I thought."

"Nah, I'm just an asshole. Nothing stupid 'bout me," Jason laughed.

"You're much less of an asshole this week than you were two weeks ago… And all the smarter for it."

"Gee, thanks," Jason snorted. "I'll swing by to let you doll up Sook at five next Saturday. Make sure ya look sexy too. You'll be escorted by the school's starting quarterback. You'll definitely end up in the yearbook!"

"Stackhouse, you'll hardly be able to keep it in your pants when you see your date on Saturday. But if you don't keep it in your pants, I'll cut it off. Got it?" Pam threatened with such a beguiling smile that it was all the more terrifying.

"Loud and clear," Jason replied without flinching or hesitating.

Pam saw him to the door, and after it was closed, she turned to find her brother watching from the hallway that led to the kitchen.

"Are you happy now? You won," Pam flung her hand out in a defeated gesture.

Eric walked over to his sister and wrapped her up in his arms, "It was never about winning, Pam. I would feel terrible if I thought you believed the only reason I was interested in Sookie was to take her away from you," he told her softly.

"I know you'd never do that to me," Pam murmured into Eric's chest.

{†}

"All right class," Dr. Jones calmed down his rowdy anatomy/physiology class. "I know you're excited about Homecoming tomorrow, but this is your last weekend before research project submissions are due! If anyone needs last minute advice before submitting the framework and experiment, now is your only chance to ask me!"

Sookie raised her hand, sending the class into an abrupt silence.

"Yes, Sookie?" Dr. Jones smiled politely, happy to see Sookie raise her hand rather than brandish her notebook.

 _"Pam and I,"_ Sookie mouthed as she took Pam's hand and shook it.

"You two are partnering up for the research project?" Dr. Jones asked in delight. "That's great. Now I won't have to fail you!" Sookie rolled her eyes, and her teacher chuckled to himself. In just under three weeks, one of his favorite students was transforming before his very eyes. _She even put up the pretense of speaking!_ He happily noted at seeing her lips move into more than a frown or apologetic smile.

Sookie handed her teacher the paperwork for the project and gave Pam an encouraging thumbs-up.

"I'm not worried about a thing if you're the one helping me," Pam smiled happily at her friend. Sookie felt her heart thrum. No one had ever counted on her before. If anything, most people just expected her to do the work and be grateful to be included…

When class let out, Pam and Sookie walked straight to Eric's car, having already grabbed all their books before last period. As they stood to wait for their chauffeur, Pam turned to Sookie and suggested that they double check the fitting on Sookie's dress for tomorrow's dance. Sookie blushed at the idea of putting on a gown made especially for her but nodded in agreement.

Once afternoon tea had been enjoyed, Pam whisked Sookie up to her room and helped her change into the smooth satin fabric of her blue dress.

"Wow, I'm even better than I thought!" Pam praised herself as she checked the hemline and the seams of the bodice. "This fits you like a glove. I'm getting really good at my measurements!"

Once the dress was fitted and Pam had supplied a lovely pair of white, strappy shoes, Sookie looked at herself in the three different angles of the full-length mirrors and frowned.

"What is it?" Pam asked worriedly. "Do you not like it? I'm sorry, I should have asked for more of your input in what you wanted-"

Sookie held up her hand to stop Pam's apologies.

 _"I've never danced,"_ Sookie confessed with a half-hearted pantomime that helped portray what her voiceless words were saying.

"What? Like slow dance?" Pam asked. Sookie nodded. "Oh, that's easy!" she waved off the girl's insecurities and skipped over to her CD player. She found a mixed tape of her 80's power ballads and put it into her CD player's tape deck.

"It's not hard at all," Pam assured as she came to her closet and took out a pair of stilettos that would have almost made her Eric's height. The way she sauntered in them made Sookie blush. The quiet girl had never seen a woman's hips move like that! There was no way she'd ever manage. "Don't worry, you won't have to wear heels like these! I'm just trying to get to Eric's height. Besides, think of it like this, you'd have to really try and step on my toes in these," Pam teased.

Sookie smiled as Pam came closer and took her hands. "So," she began, "your left hand will go here," she placed it on her own right shoulder, "and I take your right in my left. My right hand goes here," she placed it on Sookie's waist, "and now you'll just feel me pulling you along. Step to the beat of the music and just follow where you're led."

With little effort, Pam was dancing Sookie through her room. She tried a little spin, and Sookie followed it quickly. The girls smiled at one another, but it was only Pam who felt her heart begin to race. Pam was the only one who felt her blood in her cheeks, and the realization made her slow their dance to a halt and take off her shoes.

"See?" Pam recovered smoothly as pain pierced through her heart. "You'll be fine tomorrow night."

Sookie took Pam's hand back in her own, and her friend looked straight into Sookie's eyes, _"Thank you, Pam."_

With a sigh, Pam managed a nod, "See if you can't get your brother to bring you here earlier than five tomorrow. I want extra time to get you ready for the dance."

 _"Okay,"_ Sookie did the universal "OK" sign.

Pam found herself pondering what Sookie's voice would actually sound like as she walked her downstairs to the door. "ERIC!" Pam yelled as they came down the stairs. "TAKE SOOKIE HOME!"

"FINE!" Eric shouted back, but he arrived in the foyer so quickly, that Sookie wondered if he hadn't been waiting with his keys in hand for some time already. "Let's go, Sookie," Eric smiled down at her with so much happiness, it took Sookie's breath away.

 _Was Jason right? Does he actually like me?_ She wondered as she followed Eric out the door. They walked together to the car which was already in the driveway rather than sitting in the old stable that had been converted to a garage.

"Are you excited about tomorrow?" Eric asked as he opened Sookie's door for her. Sookie nodded as she slid into her seat. "Me too. It's been so long since I danced, it should be interesting."

 _"Not a good dancer,"_ Sookie pointed to herself.

"Don't worry, I can lead anyone," Eric laughed as he closed the door and headed to the driver's side.

Sookie tugged his sleeve when he sat down, and Eric looked at her. _"You like dancing?"_ The way she tilted her head cued him into the question. That was another thing he found wonderful about her. Her expressions left nothing to be doubted. Even if she said nothing, Eric had become familiar with the way her mouth tilted when she was angry, or that quizzical line that formed between her eyebrows when she was puzzling something out. He knew that she smiled when she was sad, but that her eyes grew distant. In such a short amount of time, Sookie had burrowed her way into his musings. It had nothing to do with memorization, and everything to do with captivation.

"When I'm dancing with a beautiful girl I love to dance," Eric teased with a wink, making Sookie's face burn red and turn away in embarrassment. He took her moment of shyness as an opportunity to recover from his revelations. "Mom taught all of us how to dance," he offered. "That's probably why Pam always ends up leading. We learned from an aggressive instructor," he laughed.

Sookie smiled as they drove the short distance down the road. She didn't know why the Northmans were so insistent that they give her a ride. It was only six minutes, and even in the dark, she knew these roads exceptionally well.

"Have you ever slow danced with a man?" Eric asked. He had heard the sharp drum of Pam's heels coming from her room and could guess from the tempo that there had been an impromptu dance lesson before coming downstairs. Sookie shook her head as they bounced down the road. "The best dance partners are closer to the same height, so don't be surprised if it feels awkward dancing with me," he warned. "Just remember, it's not a ballroom dancing competition. The point is to have fun, not score points."

Sookie nodded in understanding as they pulled up to her house. She got out and waved to Eric, and he returned the gesture as he watched her skip into her home. Once she was safely inside, he pulled back out of the driveway and returned home. Already he felt his anticipation for the school dance begin to grow.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _ **EDIT**** A/N: NowQuietlyDreaming, my apologies. Not being a huge fan of country music, I didn't take the time to double check when Carrie Underwood came onto the scene. The story is currently in the Fall of 1998. Carrie Underwood has been changed to Shania Twain! Thank you very much for pointing that out!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Four: Her First Date**

"Would you calm down?" Jason laughed as he took Sookie's shaking hand. "Pam just wanted you to come by earlier so she could do your makeup and stuff. Y'all will probably watch some girly movie and get ready together. I'll be back at seven to ride with ya to the dance."

Sookie looked at Jason worriedly. He was so kind lately that she was confident something terrible would happen at any moment. Why, after eight years, would he suddenly start treating her like a sister rather than a scraggly dog that had taken up residence in the crawl space beneath the house?

As Sookie worried her lip thoughtfully between her lips, her brother couldn't help but sigh to himself. The level of anxiety that was rolling off his sister was saddening, mostly because Jason felt like he was the one responsible for it. That was why when they arrived in the Northmans' driveway, he quickly pulled Sookie into a hug before she could exit the truck. Even if it took a million hugs and a trillion 'I'm sorries,' Jason was intent on assuring his sister that he had been the one who was wrong.

Once Sookie was skipping up her friends' driveway, Jason paused long enough to see she made it inside before pulling back out onto the road and heading home. The short drive back to the house gave Jason a moment to think about what his past eight years of tormenting had done. He still wasn't quite sure why he couldn't stop blaming Sookie for their parents' deaths, but he finally felt that it was wrong to do so.

An ache began to form in Jason's chest as he wondered how much different Sookie's life, and his own, would have been if he hadn't blamed her for an accident. Would she have had friends? Would she still have lost the friends that abandoned her after the accident took her voice? Would she still _have_ a voice? Jason agonized over these questions, feeling ill at the thought. Suddenly a flash of guilt took the wind from his chest as he considered the possibility that his actions could have contributed to Sookie's voice not coming back.

At that moment, Jason became determined to change things around. He had yet to receive any scholarship offers or even been approached to play football on a college level. _I guess the star QB of a backwater town can't measure up_ , he realized ruefully. Still, Danny Trumen from Renard Parish's road crew had offered him a summer job filling in potholes and other road work. It was good money for a hard day's work, and if he stayed with Gran rather than taking over his parents' house after he turned 18; maybe he could be there for Sookie while she finished up school.

Maybe all she needed was a little more support.

{†}

"And voila!" Pam pushed Sookie in front of her three angle mirror. "What do you think? Am I not a master beautician or what?"

Sookie stared in awe at her reflection. The dress Pam had stitched together for her came down just above her knee in tule waves. It was a deep, oceanic blue with a fitted bodice and off the shoulder neckline that accented her breasts without being lewd. Her hair was done up in a waterfall of tendrils, and her make-up was just prominent enough for a night event without being overdone.

Sookie's lips moved in a silent, _"Thank you!"_ over and over again as she gestured to her appearance.

"You're welcome, but don't cry over it! I don't have time to redo your make-up and do my own too!" Pam chastised as she went over to her TV and ejected _Dirty Dancing_ and pushed a copy of _Pretty Woman_ into the VHS player.

The girls sat together watching the movie while Pam started doing her hair and makeup. Before it was over, it was time to meet the boys downstairs, and Pam hoped that she could at least get one good picture of just her and Sookie.

As they made their way downstairs, Sookie saw Eric look up at the clicking of their heels, and her face turned bright red from the way he looked at her. His eyes locked on Sookie's. His hands were clenched tightly at his sides. His mouth parted as though he would start panting at any moment.

 _Is he looking at me like I'm beautiful?_ Sookie wondered wildly. Though Sookie wasn't oblivious to the fact that she was pretty, no one had ever looked at her the way Eric was at that moment. For the first time in her life, she was being gazed upon as though she had no flaws or quirks. At that moment, she was just a beautiful girl admired by a handsome man.

Sookie nearly jumped out of her skin as she and Pam reached the top of the stairs because a sudden flash blinded her. She looked away from Eric to see Godric snapping picture after picture of the two of them as they came down the stairs.

"Your gran gave me direct orders to make sure I got as many pictures of the four of you as possible!" Godric declared as he wound the camera and snapped another photo. "Stop at the bottom of the stairs so I can get a good still shot."

Pam straightened herself so tightly that she seemed to grow another two inches on top of the four her heels gave her.

"Okay, now one of siblings," Godric called, forcing them to reformat. "Now dates!" he barked. "Now give them their corsages!"

Eric looked at his brother like he'd gone completely insane.

"You have no idea how terrifying Mrs. Stackhouse is!" Godric snapped as he wound the film again. Everyone chuckled and gave in to Godric's impromptu career as a photographer. By the time the oldest Northman released them from his flashbulb's blinding assault, they were running late for dinner.

Thankfully, the only diner in Bon Temps had been prepared for late arrivals and had practically booked the whole establishment specifically for Homecoming. Sookie and her friends were seated and received their food with no problem conflicting with the dance.

"This is quite good," Pam commented on her éttoufée.

"Of course it is," Jason laughed. "Slow Southern cooking is always good."

"I've never had it before," Pam shrugged.

"Your grandmother was Lady Beauchéne!" Jason looked at her in disbelief. "How have you never had éttoufée?"

"We spent very little time down south," Eric replied solemnly. "I can probably count on one hand how many times I remember coming here. Pam would remember even less."

"Because your dad was in the Air Force?" Jason guessed.

"Yes," Eric responded in such a tone that Sookie looked at him worriedly. Jason didn't seem to notice anything wrong with the other man's voice, but Sookie felt her hand reach for Eric's. When he felt a delicate, warm touch, Eric looked down at her hand overlaying his. Eric smiled reassuringly at Sookie, "A story for another time."

" _Promise?"_ Sookie mouthed.

"I promise," he assured, turning his hand over beneath hers to give it a comforting squeeze. "How's that burger treating you?" Sookie smiled at him and gave a thumbs-up.

When they finished their dinner, Eric threw down enough cash to cover the whole bill, despite Jason's protests.

"Pam wouldn't let you pay for her food," Eric shrugged, "and I'll be damned if I don't pay for Sookie's. It seems petty to make you pay for your food, and I pay for everyone else's."

"Don't know I like another man buying my meal," Jason grumbled.

"If you go hunting with me, we'll call it even," Eric teased. After seeing Sookie prove herself to be quite the angler, Eric was keen on finding his inner outdoorsman.

"You know how to use a hunting rifle?" Jason asked as they all stood up to leave for the school.

"I will need some practice, but I'm comfortable with handguns. Our father taught all of us to shoot. Even Pam can hit her target," Eric replied as they walked out to the parking lot.

"Deer season starts in a few weeks. We should be able to get you set before then," Jason assured him. "If you want, maybe we can do some camping crash courses so my sister don't make you look like such a useless pussy out there in the woods."

It took a great deal of restraint on Eric's part not to get defensive at Jason's jibes. He wasn't embarrassed that Sookie was more capable than him outdoors, but Eric didn't plan on remaining incompetent.

Jason opened the passenger door and crawled into the back with Pam while Eric waited beside Sookie to help her into the low car. When she took her seat, Eric shut her door and went around to get behind the wheel.

The drive to school was uneventful as Pam leaned into the front seat and removed a few smudges under Sookie's eyes. Pam had chastised her for touching her face, but Sookie just sighed and smiled at her friend.

When they arrived at the school, the four of them took a group photo together before their hair or clothes became mussed from dancing. Sookie and Pam took a picture together as well as both with their dates. Sookie could already hear the gossip about, 'Sookie having pity taken on her by her only friend's brother,' but she didn't care. Eric hadn't once made her feel like he had asked her to the dance out of some obligation. All through dinner, he'd seemed happy to sit beside her. Even if he had only asked her out as a friend, he had asked her out as his friend, not just a friend of his sister.

The first few dances of the evening were to pop numbers from which both Eric and Jason were happy to excuse themselves. Pam, on the other hand, dragged Sookie onto the dance floor and they bobbed and wriggled to the music. Sookie noticed that a lot of students had stopped to watch her dance and became self-conscious. This was probably the most anyone had seen her move other than in gym class. Even then, only girls had been privy to seeing Sookie Stackhouse in motion.

"Ignore them. They're jealous of those hot dance moves," Pam shouted over the music as she wiggled in her dress like a pink mermaid. Her gold hair spilled down her body in thick, straight strands, becoming more wild and voluminous with every swing of her head.

Sookie did as her friend suggested and just focused on Pam. She let loose, she danced, and she forgot that anything other than friends and good songs filled the gym.

Finally, after another song had ended, the DJ announced he was going to 'slow it down for all the couples in the room.' Just like that, Eric and Jason appeared as if the girls had summoned them. They dutifully swept Sookie and Pam into their arms and began to sway to the music themselves.

"I seem to be a bit too tall for you," Eric chuckled as he tugged at Sookie's hand to rest against his chest rather than his shoulder. "Does that feel less awkward?" he asked as his left hand held her right one gently. Sookie slowly nodded as she felt his right hand nudge gently against her waist, leading her silently around the dance floor. Pam had been right. All slow dancing involved was stepping on the beat and letting yourself be pulled around by your partner.

"I wasn't expecting the music to be so versatile," Eric commented as they moved along, ignoring the stares and whispers. "I mostly thought I'd hear all Garth Brooks or Shania Twain," he admitted. Sookie grinned at him in amusement. "Do you… Or… can you laugh?" Her expression turned thoughtful, and it struck Eric as odd that she hadn't felt the compulsion to laugh in eight years. "That's pretty sad, Sookie," he told her gloomily. "Even a movie or tv show couldn't make you laugh?" Sookie shook her head.

The night continued quite nicely. Sookie and Pam bounced and shimmied together in the center of the dance floor for the more upbeat music, and their dates danced with them for the slower tempo numbers. By the end of the night, Sookie's feet and calves ached from all the dancing, and it took all her will-power not to take off the heels Pam had strapped to her feet. However, she'd promised herself she wouldn't take off her shoes unless Pam removed hers. After all, Pam's were twice as tall!

Unfortunately, it became quite apparent after two hours that Pam had conditioned her feet for not only wearing four-inch heels but dancing in them as well.

As the night began to wind down, the four friends left the gym to beat the crowd of cars that would soon be leaving the dance. Sookie didn't mind the early departure. _Anything to take off these shoes!_ She thought in agony.

"Sookie, do you want to spend the night tonight?" Pam asked as they approached the final stretch to Rosenfont Hall. Sookie gestured to her clothes. "We're about the same size. I got something you can sleep in." Sookie pointed to her teeth. "I'm sure we have some spare toothbrushes from the dentist lying around somewhere, too."

"She might not want to spend the night, Pam," Eric sighed.

Sookie shook her head worriedly. It wasn't that she didn't want to…

"Uh, Sook's never been to a sleepover," Jason chimed in, giving his sister an apologetic grimace.

"Oh," Pam frowned, "well, then maybe another time. We'll plan it instead of me springing it on you." Sookie shook her head frantically again. "You want to stay over tonight?" Sookie nodded. "You're sure?" Sookie nodded again. "Alright."

"Sookie," Eric turned to his date, "if you change your mind and want to go home; just let me know. I'll take you back immediately."

Sookie flushed at all the dramatics a simple sleepover was bringing. She hated being the center of attention, even worse, she hated being a burden. Still, it was nice to have friends fretting over her. It was nice to have people wanting her to be comfortable.

As they pulled into the driveway of Rosenfont Hall, Sookie felt a bit giddy as Eric came jogging around the car to open her door again. No matter how many times he did this, it made her feel special. Even if he did do this for all the girls because of the manners his mother had instilled in him, she still couldn't dissuade the butterflies in the stomach from flapping their wings.

Eric held out his hand for Sookie again, and as she accepted it and stepped out of the car, a sharp cry tore from her mouth. Her foot felt like it had pressed onto the tip of a knife and she buckled with her momentum out of the car. If Eric hadn't already been holding her hand, she might have fallen on the driveway, but instead, her date had his other arm quickly around her waist and supporting her.

"I believe your feet have finally succumbed to the torture devices strapped to them," Eric amusedly commented as he effortlessly scooped Sookie into his arms.

"Glad she's going home with you instead of me," Jason chuckled as he headed for his truck. "I wouldn't've carried her ass into the house."

Eric sighed, but then laughed to himself as he walked toward the front door. "I'll get you settled in Pam's room. She should have some Advil or something in her bathroom, and a quick wash should help too."

Pam followed close behind her brother and best friend all the way to her room. When Eric plopped Sookie on the bed, it was Pam that quickly began to unstrap the girl's shoes. "Ah, your feet are blistered…"

Sookie flushed at the look on Pam's face. Her friend looked ready to flog herself for putting Sookie in such physically demanding footwear. Sookie wanted to assure her that she'd had her fair share of blisters and that she had only been caught temporarily off guard by the pain. After all, she'd never worn heels, let alone for several hours.

"Warm soapy water to wash her feet, then put some antibacterial cream on the blisters," Eric suggested as he walked toward the door. "See you girls in the morning."

Pam gave Sookie's leg a reassuring pat, "Don't worry, I'll take care of you. Nurse Pam is on the job," She winked playfully.

Sookie sat nervously on the bed as Pam ran around the room, still in her ungodly high heels, putting together a workstation of the materials she'd need. The silent girl wished she could discourage Pam from bothering, she had gotten blistered feet more times than she could count, but it was apparent that the Northmans were intent on babying her.

Pam turned her TV and VCR player back on, pressing play to continue the rest of _Pretty Woman_ as she carried on the charade of her nursing. She washed, dried, and bandaged Sookie's feet in no time, and finally, the girls were able to prepare for bed with the movie playing softly in the background.

Walking on the outsides of her feet, Sookie hobbled to the bathroom to brush her teeth and change into the nightgown Pam had provided. It was slinky for a teenager, but Sookie knew that Pam was a little over the top when it came to her wardrobe.

Coming back to bed, Sookie snuggled on one side of the giant mattress while Pam slipped in from the other edge. With nothing more than a soft, "Good night," from Pam, the girls fell into a quick sleep.

{†}

Sookie jerked awake as an unfamiliar and concerning sensation roused her from her sleep. Somehow, unconsciously, both girls had worked toward the middle of the bed, and now Pam was spooning Sookie. One of her friend's hands was cupping her breast, and Sookie felt her face redden with embarrassment.

Gently removing Pam's hand from her body, Sookie slipped out from the bed and walked on the outer edge of her feet to use the bathroom. As she came back out, a rhythmic tapping and mechanical noise piqued her curiosity. When she glanced at the clock, she realized it was just turning midnight. _Wow, I've only been asleep for a little over an hour?_ She wondered in surprise at how awake she felt.

Walking awkwardly out of Pam's bedroom, Sookie wandered down the hall toward the mechanical noise. She realized that it sounded somewhat like a typewriter, but it came in strange intervals after the tapping sound.

As she grew closer to the noise, Sookie noticed a stream of light coming through a half-open door. When she approached close enough, she found Eric tapping away at a printing calculator as he pored over receipts and what looked like letters.

Sookie clicked her nail against the doorframe to announce herself, and Eric looked up in surprise.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" Eric asked. He hated working at night with his door closed. It felt isolated and cold.

Sookie shook her head that he had not woken her.

"Is everything all right? Did you want me to take you home?" he asked next. Sookie shook her head again. "Do… you want to come in?" She finally nodded slowly, and Eric smiled as he gestured to his bed. No one had ruffled it since the previous morning. The covers were smooth and freshly pressed with sharp, tucked corners. _Military,_ she decided. Sookie carefully sat on the corner of his bed. "How are your feet?" Sookie wiggled her hand in a non-committal manner. She pointed questioningly at his calculator and all the papers. "Oh, I handle the house accounts. Godric is shit at it, and we need to have everything precise for the lawyer who handles our stipend."

Sookie smiled at his explanation, looking automatically for a pen and paper. Eric seemed to recognize her expression because he quickly produced just that from the top drawer of his desk.

" _Do you enjoy handling the finances?"_ Sookie asked.

Eric nodded, "Yes. I actually want to go into accounting or maybe become a stockbroker? I haven't decided yet. It's sort of… caught me unprepared."

" _What do you mean?"_ Sookie asked next.

"Well," Eric fumbled in embarrassment, "our father was adamant about Godric and I going into the military. Godric fought it tooth and nail, but I was already accepting that there was no arguing the point with him. Then our mom got sick, and Godric used it as an excuse to avoid enlisting until she was through with chemo. I don't think less of him for it or anything. I wish I had the guts to stand up to our father like he did. It felt like he was fighting for more than just himself, you know?" Sookie stared. "It felt like he was fighting for my freedom too. Neither one of us has any intention of living off our inheritance. We want to work and make something more of ourselves than heirs, but…"

Eric cut himself off, but Sookie could hear his unspoken words. They didn't want to become their father either. Sookie wondered about that. From the story Pam told, she thought their parents sounded hopelessly in love, and that their family was perfect! However, Godric's tension after Pam's reminiscing, and now Eric's underlying contempt. _Always 'father,' never 'dad,'_ she noted solemnly.

" _I'm glad that you've been given your freedom,"_ Sookie wrote. _"Do you ever miss him?"_

"Miss him?" Eric laughed darkly. "What did he ever give me to miss?"

" _You don't feel guilty about not missing your father?"_ Sookie wondered.

Eric sighed, "It's bad manners to speak ill of the dead, Sookie, but let's just say that the only person in our family that he loved was our mom. He tolerated Pam, but he hated Godric and me. Without our mom, I'm sure he realized he had nothing left. Everything that made the rest of the world tolerate him was going to die with her, and I'm pretty sure he knew it. I'm pretty sure Mom knew it too because she left everything to us not him. She wanted us to be free of him too."

" _I can't imagine it,"_ Sookie confessed.

"I wish you wouldn't try," Eric replied with a touch of bashfulness. It was obvious that he felt weak in admitting he had no control over his own life before his father's death.

" _Sorry if I've been presumptuous,"_ Sookie wrote with a genuine expression of contrition on her face.

"It's okay, I'm pretty grateful to have someone to talk to about it," Eric told her. "Pam tries to romanticize our parents because she wasn't put under the same pressures as Godric and me, but our father didn't keep from pressuring Pam because she was his princess or anything. He didn't think enough of her to put any pressure. I think that's what I hated the most about him. He spoiled her to keep her shut up while thinking she was just a stupid girl who needed placating. He never saw his daughter as a girl who needed structure and attention."

It was in these few minutes of their discussion that Sookie felt that she was experiencing the most intimate exchange of her life. It hadn't been on the dance floor, being held and swayed in front of her peers. It wasn't from wearing a fancy dress and beautiful shoes. It was in listening to Eric describe his pain and speak to her as someone who heard; not as someone who couldn't talk.

"I'm glad you woke up," Eric said suddenly. Sookie tilted her head curiously. "It felt like I had to be so careful earlier than I do right now. Careful how I interacted with you, careful what I said to you. Now I just feel like we're two people having a conversation."

" _It helps that you seem to know my expressions already. I don't have to write 'why' or 'how' with you. You seem to see those questions on my face."_ Sookie smiled appreciatively.

"You have a very expressive face," Eric agreed. "I like that about you. You don't hide. Even silent, you're an open book. But, I would like to ask you some questions you can't answer with your face. I'd like to see if I can read your lips instead." Sookie frowned but nodded in agreement. "What's your favorite color?"

" _Blue,"_ she replied.

"Blue? That's mine too," he gave her a soft high-five. "What's your favorite food?"

" _Pancakes,"_ Sookie grinned.

"I'm more of a savory than a sweet fan, but pancakes are good," Eric nodded. "I love a good steak. No sauces, not a bunch of rubs or seasonings. Just a little salt, a little pepper, and steak." Sookie shook her head at his enthusiasm. "What's your favorite movie?"

" _Labyrinth."_

"Did you say _Labyrinth_?" Sookie nodded. "I've always been a huge Bruce Lee fan… When is your birthday?"

" _May 24th,"_ She held up her hands to pantomime the date this time.

"Ah ah, I said I want to read your lips," Eric teased, and Sookie rolled her eyes. To be honest, it was a great excuse to watch her plump lips move. He could watch them pucker and tense all day. He would die to feel them against his own. "Hmm," he paused, having gotten lost in his thoughts. Neither of them had realized they'd been leaning in closer and closer. Without realizing the question was on the tip of his tongue, Eric whispered, "Would you let me kiss you?"

" _Yes,"_ Sookie's lips moved very gently in acceptance just as Eric pressed his own to them. She shut her eyes as his mouth pushed carefully against her, letting the soft flesh mold and shape around their teeth until Eric pulled away. The silent girl looked at Eric questioningly. _Why did he do that?_ She wondered to herself.

"Because you're beautiful, kind and wonderful," Eric answered the question in her eyes, taking Sookie by surprise. "Only…" Sookie's shoulders slumped, "we can't tell Pam." The girl looked at him in confusion. "It's… What if we ruin your friendship with her?"

Sookie's head tilted curiously, _"Could we?"_

"Yes," Eric mumbled. "I'm the worst brother in the history of the world. Why did I kiss you?" Sookie captured Eric's hand and brought it to her lips. "We could hurt her feelings."

Sookie's hand reached once more for the pen and paper. _"Is that all you wanted from me? A kiss? Or did you want the right to kiss me whenever you want?"_

Eric hesitated, considering the implications of her question. Finally, he confessed, "I want the right to kiss you whenever I want."

Her heart pounded frantically at his admission, but she forced her hand to calmly write, _"Then we should tell her."_

"But-"

Sookie pressed her finger to his lips and Eric stared patiently back as she asked, _"Which would hurt her more? Being told the truth, or being lied to by two people who say they care about her?"_

"Well, when you put it like that," Eric grumbled.

" _I'll talk to her in the morning,"_ she wrote. _"For now, goodnight, Eric. Thank you for the best first date a girl could hope for."_

"The pleasure was all mine, Sookie," Eric stood with her. "May I have one more kiss before you go back to bed?" Sookie replied by wrapping her arms around Eric's neck as he leaned down to press his mouth once more to hers.

The second kiss was far better than the first in Sookie's opinion. It was full of just as much intensity, but far less gentleness. That flash of need behind his movements made an unexplored part of Sookie's heart explode with unfettered passion. At that moment, if she could speak, her first word would have been, _wow!_

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Good evening, everybody! I was editing this one down to the wire. It was being an uncooperative brat, but I guess that's my fault. I'm going to admit it… I've been playing the Sims 3 relentlessly the past week. I just couldn't put it down, and if this chapter hadn't already been written, I would have been extremely late getting it out! Thankfully, I put my Responsibility Hat on and finished up like I was supposed to. As of late I'm my own editor, so if you notice any issues, let me know and they will be fixed as quickly as possible! (Just like Carrie Underwood and Shania Twain)._

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Five: Revelations**

As Sookie awoke once again in Pam's bed, she rolled over to see Pam still dead to the world. She gazed nervously at her sleeping friend. _What if Eric's right and Pam gets upset that he and I kissed?_ She watched and fretted at the idea.

Suddenly, big blue eyes blinked at her, and Pam's face smiled brightly in morning greeting. "Hey there," she waved as she stretched beneath the covers. "Did you sleep alright?" Sookie nodded, but the truth was, she had slept terribly. First, she had been kept awake by the giddiness of her first kiss. Then she had been unable to sleep once she started worrying about how her changed circumstances with Eric would affect her friendship with Pam.

It was one of those times that life became far more complicated than it needed to be.

Pam finally sat up in bed, and Sookie followed suit, walking on the sides of her feet as her friend went into her closet. "I think you'd look super cute in one of my skirts or dresses," Pam smiled at her as she found a nice blue dress that surprised Sookie. The gown was made of cotton and had a subtle pattern in a slightly darker shade of blue. It was _not_ a style that screamed, **PAM'S WARDROBE!**

Her friend seemed to notice Sookie's surprise because she laughed and explained, "When my brothers told me we would be moving to Louisiana and not the New Orleans part of Louisiana, I added a bunch of Southern Belle items to my closet." Pam looked at her collection annoyedly. "I quickly realized I'm no Southern Belle. They make me look even colder than I mean to be while simultaneously taking the edge out of my statements. That does not work for me at all," Pam told Sookie. "You can have all of them if you want." Sookie shook her head a bit too energetically. She wanted the dresses, but what would her Gran think if she accepted them? "Oh well," Pam sighed as she finally handed the dress over, "you can at least wear this one today instead of what you wore over here before the dance."

" _Thank you,"_ Sookie smiled as she took the dress to the bathroom. She found her bra from yesterday, but realized that the idea of wearing yesterday's panties was just disgusting! Opting to go commando caused Sookie to experience a brief flash of awkwardness. She stepped out of the bathroom in the borrowed dress, and Pam gave a wolf whistle that about made her cheeks burst into flames.

"Wow," Pam circled her like a large cat that was ready to pounce, "I could just eat you up!"

Sookie felt faint. _Is Pam checking me out for real?_ She wondered. _No, you're just self-conscious because you have no panties on!_

"Ready for breakfast?" Pam asked, taking her hand. "I think Godric's already cooking!" Sookie didn't allow Pam to pull her from the room, and her friend looked back curiously. "What is it?"

Looking around, Sookie hobbled to her book bag and took out her notebook. Pam watched as Sookie wrote down her explanation, and then took it from her when it was hesitantly handed over.

" _I woke up last night and hung out with Eric for a bit. We kissed."_

Sookie stood nervously, her throat tight like whenever a syllable tried to sneak its way past her lips. Pam stared a long time at the short note, and the longer she stared, the more Sookie worried that Eric had been right. The change in their interests toward each other was about to ruin her first friendship in eight years!

"Then… You like him?" choked Pam. Sookie nodded slowly, her eyes big and apologetic. "Are we not going to hang out as much then?"

Sookie took her notebook back and wrote so quickly that her ordinarily beautiful script was much more rugged.

" _I don't want it to affect our relationship at all! I know it might not be something I can prevent all the time, but you're my best friend. If you told me right now you didn't want me to date your brother; I would stop things this instance!"_

"I don't want that," Pam shook her head. "I want you to be happy. If Eric could make you happy, then I'll try not to get in the way of that."

Sookie smiled and wrote a bit more calmly, " _Thank you. And I'll try not to let Eric get between you and I. You make me happy too, Pam. Just because Eric will give me kisses doesn't mean I don't appreciate and want your hugs! I like Eric, but I already love you."_

Pam felt like she'd just been shot straight through the heart. It was no arrow plucked at her by Cupid, either. No, this felt like a homicidal maniac and held a magnum to her chest and pulled the trigger. Her heart immediately exploded at the impact. She'd had her heart broken, and she wasn't sure it would ever pull itself back together. Her brothers had been right, she could love Sookie all she wanted, but Sookie would never return it the way she desired.

Instead of fixating, Pam took Sookie's hand and led her silently out of the bedroom in hopes of a reprieve from her desolation. They made it to the kitchen as Godric flipped another pancake from the stove onto a steadily growing plate.

"Morning, girls!" Godric greeted pleasantly as Eric drowsily got the coffee maker going.

"Morning. What's with the pancakes?" Pam asked curiously.

Godric shrugged, "I don't know. There was a note on my door this morning asking for pancakes for breakfast. We haven't had them in a while, so I decided to go with it."

"That's because they're full of carbs and totally against my diet!" Pam snarled.

"I'll make you some eggs," Godric sighed as he poured some batter into the pan and then went to the fridge to get more eggs.

Pam settled into her chair as Eric nearly fell asleep standing in front of the coffee pot. Sookie squirmed as she sat down. _Do panties make this big of a difference?_ She wondered as her face turned crimson once again. Shifting her weight, she tried to banish the thought that everyone knew she was sans underwear.

"Are you feeling alright, Sookie?" Godric asked as he turned and saw her red face. "You look like you're burning up."

Sookie shook her head and fanned herself as if trying to say the kitchen was too hot.

"Sookie's probably burning up because she's in the same room as Eric," Pam taunted, making Sookie look at her friend in surprise and simultaneously cause Eric to jump as well. He glanced at Pam with hesitation and wondered just how willing she would be to gloss over the topic.

"What?" Godric spun around and looked at the three of them worriedly.

"Eric stole Sookie's first kiss last night," Pam sing-songed teasingly making her brother and best friend squirm uncomfortably. It was obvious to Eric that this playful exchange was not going to end well for him. Pam's flippant acknowledgment of the relationship was not fooling Eric at all. After so many years together, Pam knew how to play her brothers, and she was playing Godric like a fiddle.

"She's too young for you," Godric snapped at his brother, confirming Eric's concerns. Sookie protested by holding up two fingers, pointing out that there was not even a two-year gap between them. "Trust me Sookie, he's older in other ways," Godric growled.

Eric's face tightened angrily, plummeting unexpectedly into Pam's trap, "She doesn't need to know about that just yet!"

"Eric was a man whore," Pam added offhandedly in that same pleasant voice that made Eric rightfully suspicious. Sookie looked at Eric in surprise before she took a calming breath. He was looking at her with a pleading gaze. He was almost begging her with his eyes not to let his siblings' words destroy her image of him.

Finally, Sookie mouthed, " _So?"_ Eric relaxed, but Godric seemed irritated.

"He'll just break your heart, Sookie," Godric warned, not wanting to see a sweet girl like Sookie endure his brother's clumsy attempts at a relationship. Even if Eric was serious about Sookie, Godric doubted his younger sibling could manage to change his motivations so entirely. "He's not old enough to be settled down yet. Believe me."

"Who do you think you are acting like you know me so well?" Eric snarled at his brother. "I can change!" Godric looked at Eric skeptically. "For her, I would change!"

"And when you go to college next year?" Godric pointed out. "When a bunch of girls you haven't slept with are surrounding you, and Sookie's not nearby to remind you why you aren't sleeping with them?"

"We've known each other for two months," Eric complained. "Why are you acting like we need to have all the answers this second!?"

"Because she's your sister's friend, and you could ruin that for her," Godric replied impatiently.

Sookie's gut ached at the argument before her. Not only did it scare her to know that she had caused it, but it hurt. It hurt because she was no longer part of the room. She had disappeared into the scenery and become just as invisible as she was silent. Without any problem, she managed to slip from her barstool, leave the room and hobble out the front door to put on her sneakers from yesterday. Even with her feet blistered and aching, she made it home without anyone intervening.

"Hey, Sook!" Jason greeted as his sister came through the kitchen door. "That's a cute dress. Is it Pam's?" His sister's face crumpled at the question, and a harsh sob choked at her throat. "Whoa!" Jason stood up and wrapped his arms around her. True, he was still getting used to being a big brother to her again, but even he couldn't deny that something had gone wrong. "What happened?"

Sookie pushed away at her tears and looked for a pad of paper, remembering that she'd left her book bag in Pam's room. She grabbed the blank scraps by the phone and quickly scrawled, " _Eric and I kissed and now everyone's fighting! I ruined things again!"_

Jason read the note and pulled his sister back into his arms. "You didn't ruin nothing. You never did." His sister cried harder. "Mom and dad weren't your fault, and neither is this."

"Mm," Sookie choked, and Jason felt his heart echo with a pang of sadness. Crying. Every syllable he'd heard from his sister in eight years had been while she cried.

"But nothing," Jason finished for her as he stroked her hair. "I'm sorry I made you feel like it was your fault. I'm sorry I didn't just let my anger out like I shoulda. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I prayed you'd never speak again. I want to hear you so bad right now. I want you to be able to cry-talk at me," Jason began to sob into her hair as eight years of pent-up emotions finally clawed their way to the surface.

"What in heaven's name is going on in here?" Adele demanded as she stormed into the kitchen. "Jason Corbett Stackhouse, what have you done to your sister this time?" When she saw that Jason was crying too, she froze in wonderment. "What _is_ going on in here?"

Jason pulled away to wipe away his tears and looked to their grandmother, "Sookie had her first kiss."

Adele's face lit up. "With Eric?" she asked excitedly. Sookie nodded and wiped at her own eyes. "Then why are the two of you crying?"

"I guess it stirred things up at the Northman house," Jason explained. "Sookie thought it was her fault. I was just trying to tell her it wasn't."

Adele frowned, "Because of your friendship with Pam? Are they worried about that?" Sookie nodded. She couldn't stand to confess that it had more to do with Eric's previous relationships with women that ignited the fight. "Well, you shouldn't let a little sibling squabbling hurt your feelings. Siblings know the best and the worst about each other," Adele told them. "Although, I feel terrible for Eric. Siblings should bicker amongst themselves, not company."

Sookie looked gloomily at her hands. _Maybe they did feel they were arguing among themselves._

"What's wrong, Dear?" Adele pressed as she sat the three of them around the kitchen table.

Pushing away a fresh tear, Sookie took up the paper and pen again. " _It made me feel like they forgot I was there at all. It was the first time they ever made me feel like I'd disappeared. I got up and walked out of the house in the middle of the fight, and no one noticed."_ Jason's hand was back at her scalp, petting it soothingly.

"You have a unique circumstance, Sookie," Adele told her. "I'm not saying that I feel particularly proud that the Northmans would have such a spat in front of a guest, but I know that you do a terrific job of making yourself as unobtrusive as possible when you're uncomfortable. If they were truly baring their fangs at each other, I'd think they could have easily overlooked any one of us." Adele gazed sadly at her granddaughter. "I know that doesn't make you feel any better, though."

Sookie set her forehead against the table as she let more tears leak from her eyes. She startled when a knock came at the door, but Jason patted her back. "I got this."

Jason went to the front of the house and opened the door to see Eric Northman standing nervously on his porch holding Sookie's book bag. As quickly as possible, he swung the storm door open so that Eric had to jump back to avoid being struck by it.

"Somebody there?" Jason called, looking past Eric and out to the hill. Eric looked at him curiously.

"Uh, Stackhouse?" Eric's brow drew together.

"That's weird. Coulda swore I heard a knock," Jason grumbled as he closed the door and stepped back inside.

Eric stared at the door in annoyed realization before he knocked again. _It's not like I meant to ignore her!_ He thought frustratedly. Once more, Jason flung the door open like he was trying to hit Eric with it, and looked around again as if he couldn't even see the other man. Before Jason could close the door once more, however, Eric caught it and shoved his way through. "Oh, get the fuck out of the way!" he snapped as he shouldered past Jason and headed for the kitchen.

"Eric Northman! You watch your language in my house!" Adele harped as she heard the exchange.

"I'm sorry, but it's difficult to come apologize when you can't even get into the house," Eric grumbled as he placed Sookie's bag on the table.

"You coulda called," Jason pointed out. "Sookie might not be able to talk, but she can listen, and that's all she'd need to do, right?"

"I'm sorry!" Eric flung his hands out. "I'm sorry my family drudged up ancient history. I'm sorry that I got around while we jumped from airbase to airbase. I'm sorry that I wasn't ready to plan out the rest of my life over breakfast after a first kiss!" he rattled out in frustration. "I don't know the first thing about relationships, Sookie. I really don't. I do know that you are the first girl I've ever known who gave a shit about anything other than how I look. My father didn't give enough of a fuck about what I wanted to do with my life, but you make me feel like a person. Not a number, not a face, but an actual person. I'm sorry that I made you feel less than any of that this morning. No matter how my brother and sister were making me feel, I shouldn't have left you by yourself. They were attacking me, not you. They were trying to protect you from me. I'm a selfish, terrible person. They know it. I know it, and now you do too."

Sookie looked up at Eric as she contemplated his words. He was so self-assured, handsome, and fearless compared to anyone else that she knew. If she hadn't been shown these insecure sides the previous night, she might have thought he was trying to trick her into some false sense of kinship. Thankfully, she knew that in some ways he was just as lost as her; not nearly as damaged, but lost none-the-less.

" _If anyone knows what it's like not to be perfect; it's me,"_ Sookie told him as she held up the notepad for him to see. " _Let's find out if the things we've gotten right can fill in what we're missing for each other."_

Eric smiled, leaned down and took the pen from her. She watched as his hand simply wrote, " _Let's."_

{†}

Pam curled up on her bed tiredly. There was nothing quite so exhausting as feeling sorry for yourself.

 _They all warned me she was straight,_ Pam thought as she hugged her pillow closer to her face. Even with that knowledge, though, it didn't ease the heartache. For a moment longer, she wished she could pretend that she and Sookie could have been more. Just a few more weeks, another month if some higher power felt she deserved it, and she might not feel like her heart was breaking. _Or maybe it would hurt even worse,_ she considered sadly.

She wasn't mad, that much she knew to be true. It wasn't fair to be angry at Sookie for being straight, and she was only really annoyed with Eric. Part of Pam felt indignant that Eric moved forward despite knowing his sister's feelings, but another half of her understood why her brother had been unable to resist.

To be honest with herself, Pam was scared. She was scared that her idiot brother would do something stupid and make Sookie stop wanting to spend time with her. Pam grew accustomed to being alone, starting over, and losing friends. However, this time, there wasn't a restart button to hit. Her life wouldn't begin anew at the next airbase. She would be in Bon Temps for the next three years. At some point, the three of them would decide who kept Rosenfont Hall, but that wouldn't happen until they had all completed college. That was a rule in their mother's will regarding their inheritance. Each of them had to receive no less than a four-year degree before they could be given their money. It had been Alice Northman's way of telling them to stay together and to support one another. And to study. That was what their mother cared about were her children and their education.

A knock at her door made Pam sit up in bed. "Yeah?" she called.

"It's Godric," her brother called carefully. "May I come in?"

"Sure," she sighed, flopping back onto her bed.

"How are you holding up?" asked Godric.

Pam shrugged. "Fine, I guess. As long as Eric doesn't ruin my friendship, I'll be good."

Godric came to sit on the corner of her bed, "I'm worried about that too. I just don't know how Sookie could handle the stress of our brother. She has so many other things to deal with."

Turning onto her other side to face her sibling, Pam asked, "What do you mean?"

He shrugged, "Well since my semester doesn't start until January, I've just been exploring my psychology books on my own. Sookie's told us that the doctors agree that there's no physical reason she shouldn't be able to speak. That makes me feel that her problem might be a subconscious resistance to speaking. Like she feels that she shouldn't be allowed to speak."

Pam snorted, "If that were the case, why would she write anything other than what others directly asked?" Godric frowned thoughtfully. "That's the problem with Psych majors, you read a few big words and think you know someone inside and out. You've hardly spent as much time with Sookie as Eric or me. I won't say that you might not be on the right track. I don't know. We've all only known each other a couple months."

Godric smiled in embarrassment, "I guess I was jumping the gun on my diagnosis."

"Hey, you're only going to be a Junior next year," Pam nudged him with her foot. "You're hardly a full-blown psychologist. After this morning, obviously, neither of us are."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Godric asked curiously.

"We shouldn't have ganged up on Eric like that. Especially not in front of Sookie," Pam mumbled with gloomy reflection.

"She should know what she's getting into," Godric protested.

"She should," Pam agreed, "but not like that. We weren't fair to either of them. I was… still a little bitter, and you. I don't know what got your back up."

"I've seen the way Eric is with girls in a way that you haven't," Godric told her. "Even if you think I don't know her well at all, I at least know that she's a sweet girl. I don't think she deserves to be treated that way."

Pam thought about that a moment before asking tentatively, "But have you ever seen him interested in a girl like Sookie? Not just the physical. She's gorgeous. I'd bang her," Pam pointed out. "I mean the temperament. Most of the girls Eric hooked up with were bitches."

"That's what worries me," Godric moaned, ignoring the fact that Pam apparently had more knowledge about Eric's conquests than he first thought. "How could he possibly know how to treat such an introverted girl? He's an extrovert. He's only ever dated extroverts-"

"Eric is not an extrovert," Pam snorted.

"What are you talking about? He's cocky, boisterous-"

"Eric hates being in the spotlight; it just usually gets shined on him. Just because he's not socially awkward doesn't mean that he's someone hunting for the limelight! Honestly, I think most of that boasting is an attempt to get people to stop wanting to be around him."

Godric stared at his sister in surprise. He hadn't expected her to come to Eric's defense so quickly. He also hadn't expected Pam to be so aware of their middle brother's habits and personality. However, his plan to ease Pam's concerns by forcing her to reflect on Eric's true nature was worth sounding like an ignorant prick. Though he was still certain that Eric wasn't ready for a relationship as complicated as one with Sookie Stackhouse, the conversation was easing some of his own worries, too.

"I guess I don't know my brother very well," Godric sighed dramatically. "Or my sister, for that matter."

Pam gave her brother another nudge with her toe, "You know us just fine, it's just that school's got you thinking too much with your head and not enough with your heart. Maybe this semester off will be good for you."

"Hopefully. LSU- Shreveport has a decent psychology program, so I'm not too worried about it," Godric commented, amused to know that Pam was all too happy to let go of her frustration with Eric in exchange for proving her oldest brother wrong.

"I'm sorry you didn't get to stay in NYU," Pam whispered. "I know leaving New York hit you almost as hard as it hit me."

Godric shrugged, "We had to do what we had to do. With the terms of Mom's will, we didn't have much choice. Besides, in the short amount of time we've been here, I've found that I'm grateful to be here."

"Me too… But you already told Eric if he gets accepted to UNO, you won't stop him from going. Why are you letting him go there, but you're stuck here?" Pam wondered.

Her older brother smiled sadly, "Because I'm grateful that Eric _finally_ understands he's not obligated to join the military. I don't know if he'll stick with accounting, but at least he's finally thinking about what he wants instead of what's expected of him. Also, New Orleans is only a five-hour drive. He can come back here whenever he wants."

"Five hours is forever," Pam moped. "If he and Sookie stay together, they'll never see each other."

Godric flopped back onto Pam's bed and stared at the ceiling. He had the same exact concerns, but he was determined not to stick his nose into any of it like he had that morning. "I guess they'll have to work that out for themselves."

"I guess," Pam agreed reluctantly.

{†}

"Would you go for a walk with me?" Eric asked as he finished the breakfast Adele had provided him. "I mean if you don't have to rush off to church?" He glanced at the Stackhouse family.

"I told them we'd go to evening service today so they could sleep in after the dance," Adele explained as she cleared his plate. "Just have her back before five if you two go out."

"Sookie? Do you want to go?" he asked the girl again.

Sookie still seemed a bit down from the morning's experience. She pointed at her feet, and Eric groaned. He'd forgotten she had blisters from the previous night. _They're probably throbbing from walking home, too,_ he thought bitterly of himself. "Right… Then what about a drive?" he offered, making Sookie nod her head slowly.

" _Okay,"_ Sookie told him as her eyes still seemed cautious.

"Are you sure?" Eric asked in concern as she grabbed her notebook and pen from the book bag he'd returned to her. She nodded. "… Okay." Eric placed his hand around her waist, and she wanted to tell him that a couple of blisters weren't a big deal, she just wasn't up for recreational walking.

As politely as last night, Eric opened the passenger door for her and held onto her hand as she lowered herself into the seat. " _Thank you."_

"You're welcome," he smiled as he closed her door and ran around to his side. "I'm sorry about earlier," he apologized again. "We aren't usually so vicious to one another." He bowed his head thoughtfully, "I think it was because they thought they needed to protect you from me."

Sookie placed her hand lightly on his forearm. She wished she could tell him that his past was concerning, but that she was more than willing to let him try. Admittedly, it was scary to date someone who had so many varied experiences from her, but that wasn't the part that put her on edge. It was that he seemed to find women disposable. There was always the trope of not having encountered the right woman, but Sookie considered the idea to be a work of fiction.

Eric glanced at the fingertips barely caressing his forearm. He could feel Sookie's assurances, but also her hesitation.

"Do you want to know, Sookie?" Eric asked as they bounced from her driveway to the country road that was mostly potholes. When her touch hesitated to leave, he elaborated, "Do you want to know my past from my own mouth?" He could see her nod out of the corner of his eye. "All right, but let me find a spot to pull over, and we'll talk about it."

Sookie felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. In the time they had known each other, Sookie held felt their relationship had been one of acquaintance rather than friendship. She had spent most of her time with Pam, really only interacting with Eric during the drive to and from school and afternoon tea! She couldn't deny that she was attracted to him from the beginning, but she quickly understood why Eric was so frustrated. In her opinion, Godric and Pam had put more pressure on the pair of them than Eric's past ever could.

Before Sookie could find a way to tell him she didn't need to know a thing, Eric had pulled up alongside the lake they had fished at not too long ago. "It's the only place I know yet," Eric chuckled as he let his Acura roll along the edge of the road until he was out of the way of traffic. "So, I guess it's easier to begin at the beginning," Eric started nervously.

"The first girl I had sex with was when I was fourteen," he told her point blank. "She was a year older than me. She was my friend's older sister, and I'd always thought she was pretty. There was nothing sexy or romantic about it. Mostly it was two kids who had no idea what they were doing except what they figured out from movies and stuff."

Sookie felt her forehead erupt into a sweat, not just because of the story, but because Eric was staring her straight in the eyes. He refused to break eye contact as he analyzed every expression on her face.

"We weren't in love. I guess we just found each other to be the right kind of familiar. She felt safe. We had sex three times before I moved to the next airbase," he finished.

Sookie took out her notebook and asked, " _Do you remember her name?"_

Eric laughed, "Yes, I remember her name. I remember all their names. First and last."

" _How many?"_ she wrote out next.

Sookie frowned as Eric had to pause and count, "Twelve, but I did make out with and mess around with more than that. I'll be honest; I don't know all of those girls. Sometimes shit happened at parties, but I didn't have sex with anyone I didn't know for at least a little while. I guess, if… you know an accident happened, I wanted to know who that person was and when it happened. I always wore a condom though, and Godric's had me tested, probably more times than I needed. The last time I slept with anyone was after we found out about Mom's cancer. It's been long enough that if any Eric Juniors were running around, I should have known about it by now."

" _Why did you stop?"_ Sookie wondered.

Eric flinched a bit, "Well when mom got sick; I stopped hopping from girl to girl. It was a hard time, and I didn't want to be with anyone. I guess some people want to connect with others during tough times, but it made me even sadder. It made me sick to my stomach that I could be spending time with my mom instead of some girl. So, that's what I did. If I wasn't asleep or at school, I was with Mom."

Sookie smiled at him gently and took his hand to give it a comforting squeeze.

"I was never with a girl that I cared about, Sookie. Girls are drawn to me, but it never felt like they wanted me for the right reasons. So, instead, they became something to pass the time between hopping to the next base. I'm not trying to make an excuse for avoiding heartbreak by keeping things superficial. I'm not trying to say that I think girls are disposable either. It's just, most of the twelve didn't care about me either. There was probably only two that I broke the hearts of, and it was more than likely because it was their first time and not because it was me. I was always honest about why I would sleep with them. I never pretended to be in love, or sometimes even care. Some might have thought they could change my mind if they stuck around. I don't know. I guess either way you slice it; it sounds pretty shitty."

Sookie thought for a moment before taking up her pen, " _It sounds sad, for all of you, but I guess it's better than if you led those girls on with some promise or false emotion. I don't understand it, but that doesn't matter. What matters to me is that you understand that I_ do _want your heart, and I don't want empty kisses."_

Eric considered the girl's circumstances, "I don't think it's possible to give you anything empty. I'm always thinking about you, so I don't think our kisses could ever be meaningless."

" _What do you mean?"_

"Well," Eric contemplated, "last night the first time I kissed you was because you made me feel real. I hadn't felt like that for so long. So I guess it was a grateful kiss. The second time I kissed you, it was because it felt so good the first time that I needed another one before you left."

Sookie felt her lips tighten with the embarrassment of a repressed smile. He could tell that his response pleased her.

"If what you mean is you don't want kisses of obligation or pity, then you have nothing to worry about. Even right now there's a strong desire to kiss you. That's the emotion too. Desire. But, I don't have any intention of sleeping with you for quite a while. Even if we both want it," Eric looked away from her curious gaze. The relief, but disappointment he saw there was almost too much. "I don't know about you, but I got a lot to work through, and I feel like you're the person I want with me to work through it. Sex makes things messy and complicated."

Sookie nodded slowly in agreement, but she couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. " _Okay,"_ she mouthed.

"I'd like it if we got through some milestones and hurdles together before we bring that into it," Eric suggested. "Maybe we could wait and see where we are after I start college? If we can make it through that, then I think we can make anything work."

" _You won't sleep with anyone for another year?"_ Sookie asked in surprise.

Eric shrugged, "There's plenty of things to do in college other than girls, Sookie. Besides, I haven't been with a girl for about eleven months now already."

All Sookie could think about was how bad of a mood Jason got in when he didn't get a hook up for an extended period. A dry spell, he'd call it. Of course, she wasn't supposed to know about that, but being silent sometimes made students talk more freely around her. It was almost like reading minds because people would share things within earshot of her because they would forget that being silent didn't also mean she was deaf.

"You seem doubtful," Eric laughed.

" _It seems like you're putting more of a strain on yourself than me,"_ Sookie agreed.

Eric smiled a bit to himself, "I don't know about that... But, the real thing is, if I fuck up, I couldn't stand myself if I broke your heart and took something else I couldn't give back. I can live with a lot of things, but that seems worse than all of it," he confessed softly.

Sookie stared at him as he told the real truth. A thrum in her heart cried out in appreciation. After all, a man as handsome as Eric Northman could have his pick of the litter, and to be assured that this hands-off policy was to protect her eased the blow to her self-esteem.

"Besides," Eric began anew, "just because I said we wouldn't have sex, doesn't mean I won't happily play with you when you ask." The look Eric gave her made Sookie's face burn. It wasn't embarrassment that caused her face to go red; not entirely at least. It was something in his smile that made her heart and stomach clench. There was a promise in that smile that said she would want him to touch her. There was a certainty that she would eventually find the celibacy challenging as well.

"May I kiss you when you look so damned cute that I feel overwhelmed?" Eric laughed at her flushed face and chuckled further at her dumbfounded nodding. "Good." He leaned in and captured her lips, his own still tight with a smile as they touched.

"You know," he said as he pulled away, "the way you keep your lips so tightly together is only making you even cuter."

Sookie let out a frustrated little huff.

"So, where shall we go on our first official date as boyfriend and girlfriend?"

The girl beside him twisted her neck to gawk wide-eyed.

"What? You don't want to be my girlfriend?" Eric teased.

Staggered by the sudden change in her world's order, Sookie could only stare. Just this morning Eric had lost his mind over being told he had to plan for the future. Now he was calling her his girlfriend and planning out the next year! Sookie held her head in her hands as she tried to absorb all that had transpired the past few hours. They'd shared their first kiss, had their first family induced drama, shared his less than spotless past, made plans for the future, and took a step to becoming an official couple. After seeing Eric jump so many hurdles in their budding romance, it made Sookie want to begin her own race to find out how many she could clear, too.

Gazing at Eric fondly, she thought about what had brought her down this intriguing line of introspection. Finally, with a smile on her lips, she wrote in her notebook, " _Your girlfriend would like to go to the library."_

"Your boyfriend would be happy to take you," Eric replied as he turned the engine of his car back on and headed to town.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: I'm a little early tonight, not that I think anyone would complain! I hope you all enjoy!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Six: The Art of Conversation**

Eric watched, enchanted by the way Sookie loped through the bookshelves of the small town library. No one would have thought she was still nursing a pair of blistered soles with the way she pranced about the stacks of literature, but there was no containing her joy at being in the library. Soon there was a pile of books on a work table, and Eric was finally forced to ask what they were doing.

"What are we researching?" he whispered, but still earned a professional 'shh' from the librarian. He turned his head to raise his eyebrows at the crotchety old woman. There was no fathoming a way to soften his voice any further.

Sookie smiled excitedly, " _My research project with Pam."_

Choosing not to be shushed again, Eric took her pen and asked, " _What's your project?"_

" _Demonstrating the nervous system responding to stimuli after death,"_ Sookie answered.

" _How?"_ Sookie pointed to the stack of books and stuck her tongue out at her boyfriend who rolled his eyes. " _Anything I can do?"_ he asked.

Sookie thought for a moment, but realized that her idea of a date was… studying… by herself.

" _I could just borrow these, and we could go do something else,"_ she offered, embarrassed that she had forgotten to consider his needs as well. Pam always had great ideas, and Sookie was quickly coming to the understanding that she had no idea how to make plans for two.

Eric frowned at her unease, but snatched her pen back from her, " _How about you pick me out your favorite book. I can read that while you research. That way you can get some work done, and I can have something to talk to you about during lunch?"_

Sookie's eyes widened at his offer, but she became suddenly embarrassed. Could she stand to let Eric read her favorite book? Would he even be caught dead reading it? She couldn't see Eric sitting there reading a cheesy romance novel. Sookie knew they were terrible, but romance was her biggest, most secret fantasy. She wasn't ready for him to know that!

" _Can it be_ one _of my favorite books?"_ Sookie asked.

Eric smiled and nodded.

Sookie leaped silently from her chair and moments later returned with, _Death is a Lonely Business_ _._

Eric smiled as she handed it to him, "I've read this one."

"SHHH!"

Eric flinched and reached once more for the pen and paper, " _I love Ray Bradbury."_

Sookie pointed to herself with a grin and mouthed, " _'Martian Chronicles'?"_ Eric nodded, and she reached for the pen to tell him, " _The poem, around the beginning, is one of my favorites."_

" _I don't remember it off the top of my head,"_ Eric replied, finding a thrill in his blood as their hands touched while the pen was passed back and forth.

Sookie dove back into the stacks of books and returned with a book of poetry. Lord Byron. Eric knew the name, but couldn't recall if any of his work had been in a Ray Bradbury book.

Flipping to the table of contents, Sookie found the poem she was looking for, and Eric spotted a title that seemed familiar. However, his girlfriend quickly flipped to the set of stanzas she sought that were not so ingrained in his memory.

 _So we'll go no more a-roving_

 _So late into the night_

 _for the heart be still as loving_

 _and the moon be still as bright_

As Eric read the words, he could remember the passage from the book she had mentioned. It was strange to jump back five years of his life and remember the book he had read as a seventh grader. Eric had not gained his height just yet and been bullied from time to time because many thought the boy would be short like his older brother. Then, in the summer between seventh and eighth grade, he'd grown several inches just in time to start at a new school. Three weeks after that, he lost his virginity, and Eric began losing sight of himself in all the new possibilities the world started to offer him.

Taking the book into his hands, Eric decided that a late morning with a book of poetry and a pretty girl was a day well spent. Sookie watched him as he began flipping through the different stanzas and eventually smiled to herself as she started her research. After a half hour of memorizing some promising material to spring on his girlfriend later, Eric found his mind wandering and unfocused. He couldn't shake the conversation they'd had in his car or the concern it caused to bubble up inside him.

He felt annoyed with himself for bringing up the possibility of sex between them. Of course, the topic had revolved around Eric's sordid past, but he hadn't intended to infer that he was already thinking about when it would be time to start having sex again. What he'd meant to be a reassurance that he wasn't in any sort of hurry to jump into bed might have become some sort of insinuation.

The only solace he could scrounge up was that Sookie didn't appear uncomfortable. Perhaps he was overthinking things, and she had understood or even appreciated his intentions to wait. Maybe she realized that he hadn't set some arbitrary date, but merely tried to express that there was no rush.

Deciding not to dwell any longer, Eric refocused himself on watching the cute way Sookie's nose scrunched as she read the book in front of her and idly tapped the end of her pen against her plump bottom lip. Before he knew it, all the anxiety washed away, and he remained peacefully sitting, contemplating.

Glancing up from her book, Sookie saw Eric watching her and blushingly began packing up her things. He had patiently sat with her in the library for two hours, it was time to let him loose.

Flipping to a clean sheet of notebook paper, Sookie realized she would need a new one soon as she asked, " _Where to now?"_

" _Chili dogs and milkshakes?"_ Eric suggested with an impish look on his face. Sookie wasn't sure exactly what it was about that expression, but a squeak broke free from her throat as a giant grin spread across her lips. "I MADE YOU LAUGH!" Eric roared happily, making the poor librarian nearly have a heart attack at his sudden noise.

"HUSH!"

Eric ignored the chastising and enveloped Sookie in his arms instead. They hugged for a moment before Sookie gently pushed him away and bashfully went back to stacking her books. With a limb still draped around her waist, Eric took the books in his free one and carried them to the counter. His girlfriend handed over her library card and they both silently, patiently waited as the librarian stamped the rental form for each book and glared at Eric the entire time.

When they were free to go on their way, Eric put Sookie's books into the back seat of his car and pointed up the road to the single chain restaurant in all of Bon Temps: Dairy Queen.

"Up for walking to the corner?" Eric asked, pointing at the little restaurant.

Nodding in agreement, Sookie let Eric take her hand as they strolled toward the corner. As Eric's palm held hers, Sookie marveled at its strength and warmth. Only her hand was protected by his, but somehow, she knew that the rest of her was as well. He would pull her from danger and shield her from attacks. That was what his grasp conveyed to Sookie.

 _What if someone sees him holding my hand?_ Sookie panicked at the idea. She knew that entire flocks of teenage girls followed Eric around at school. If one of them saw Eric holding her hand, would they be mean to him? Would he lose friends?

There was no time to agonize over the possibilities as they were soon walking into the little Dairy Queen, and Eric ordered them both a pair of chili dogs and a shake. There was a brief flash of embarrassment as Sookie had to mouth the word, " _Chocolate,"_ for her milkshake flavor, and Amber Tinkle's mouth dropped open at the pretense of Sookie trying to communicate without her notebook. Amber was in Jason's grade and had known Sookie for several years. Even when visiting at Jason's house, she'd never witnessed Sookie move her lips for more than a yawn or sneeze.

It was in that moment of stunned observation that Amber noticed the pair holding hands. All of her will-power was utilized to complete the order before she grabbed her coworker to gossip in the supply closet.

Eric sighed as he watched his classmate drag another boy from his grade out of sight, and knew that the waves of rumors would already begin. Despite his best efforts to steer Sookie into the plastic booth furthest from the counter, she could still hear as Amber went to tell Kevin Davies that 'Crazy Sookie' was on a date with 'the hot, new guy.'

"Didn't they go to homecoming together?" he heard Kevin ask.

"Yeah, but she's friends with his sister. I thought it was just a pity date," Amber replied.

"Is it okay?" Eric asked Sookie, trying to distract from the noisy teens, and his girlfriend found herself being pulled from eavesdropping mode.

Blushing, Sookie nodded. She never intended to eavesdrop. Somehow, everything just seemed much louder and more noticeable to her.

"Could those two talk any louder?" Eric wondered in annoyance. Sookie looked at him in surprise as he raised his voice to make sure the gossipers could hear him. Suddenly, the shop went quiet, and Sookie felt even more embarrassed. She wondered if he'd purposefully sat them in the booth furthest from the storage room. "How about next time we go to Shreveport or Bossier? Maybe that way you won't have to listen to crap like this. I bet the food would be better too."

Nodding slowly in agreement, Sookie ate the remainder of her lunch in silence. She had Amber's shocked face imprinted on her eyes as Sookie mouthed her order. In less than a day, Sookie felt like she'd been talking to someone. Eric could already read her lips so well! She'd felt almost normal.

Now, Sookie couldn't help but feel resentful of her notebook. She found herself sitting on it to avoid having to use it in the conversation. She didn't want Amber to peek over at them and see her writing to speak with Eric. Sookie could already imagine the assumptions her classmates would make about what she was writing to him. It was one thing for the community to make fun of her. It was an entirely different thing to listen to Eric get dragged into all the teasing and gossip. She could practically hear the news headline for the next day. 'Hot Guy Sets Sights on Silent Friend of Sister.'

As they finished up lunch, Eric took Sookie's hand and tugged her toward the door. He didn't feel like sticking around after seeing how much his girlfriend's mood had been affected.

"Are you alright?" Eric asked once they were back in the car. Sookie looked at her notebook sadly. For the first time in a long time, it embarrassed her. It wasn't her tool for overcoming a disability at that moment. Instead, it felt like a shackle keeping her imprisoned for the crime she committed eight years ago. "Sookie?"

Sookie held up the notebook like a shield, and her expression was enough for Eric to see the contempt she had for the book through which she communicated.

"I don't mind at all," he told her. "You shouldn't mind either." He took the notebook from her and

looked at the cover which she had decorated with creeping vines and blooming flowers. She had an affinity for floral patterns. "This is your voice, Sookie. Written or spoken, I get to know your thoughts. I get to see more than just the words. I can see when the words get sloppy because you're excited or nervous. I can see when you're thoughtful or cautious from the pen lifts. It's still a voice, Sookie. This is your voice, and it's beautiful."

Tentatively, Sookie took her notebook back, " _And if all of this works out between us, you don't mind having to listen to people talk about 'Crazy Sookie' behind our backs?"_

Eric sighed, "What they say won't have any effect on how I feel about you. That doesn't mean I won't mind hearing people say shitty things about someone I know to be wonderful. I will mind, but I'd also mind if I heard them say things about Pam or Godric."

" _I don't want you to endure that, though."_

"Sookie," Eric rolled his eyes with frustration, "do you think I wanted you to endure listening to my own siblings drudge up the skeletons in my closet? Not at all. The point is, we talked it through, and we're fine. Right?" Sookie nodded slowly in acceptance. "So life won't be perfect. You'll have to hold me back from smashing in stupid people's faces when they talk shit about you. I'll make especially sure people realize what you mean to me. So can we stop looking at your notebook like some sort of anchor around our necks?"

" _Okay,"_ she mouthed, making Eric smile at her and finally start their drive home.

"Do you want to have afternoon tea with us?" Eric asked as he drove toward Rosenfont Hall. He had mastered the art of watching for her head's movements in his peripheral vision.

Sookie shook her head as she realized she still needed to shower and dress before going to early evening services. They didn't begin until 5:30PM, but she didn't want to be in a hurry. It was already after two. Afternoon tea usually lasted an hour, and Sookie knew Pam wouldn't let her go easily.

Eric glanced at her, seeing the contemplative expression on her face. _She probably still has chores to do, and she's been stuck with us all weekend so far,_ he thought sympathetically.

"It's probably a good thing if you went home for now. I think Godric, Pam and I need to have it out over tea time," Eric laughed. "Besides, you got church tonight."

Sookie nodded, grateful that he at least guessed half of her reason for declining the offer. As he pulled up in front of her house, he leaned in and gave her a chaste kiss. "Because you're sweet, and it makes me happy," he teased before jumping out of the car and getting her door.

 _Mister Manners!_ Sookie thought as he walked her to the door and everything.

"Thanks for a perfect first date," Eric gave her one more kiss, and Sookie opened her front door as she waved goodbye.

With a new skip in his step, Eric went home to find Godric had put out his preferred peppermint tea for their afternoon tradition. Pam appeared to be stewing about the absence of her jasmine.

"Hey," Eric carefully greeted as he came through the sitting room archway.

Godric looked at him and just as hesitantly replied, "Hey."

"Sookie's not with you?" Pam asked worriedly.

"She had to go to church since they didn't go this morning," Eric explained as he slowly entered the room.

"You were with her this whole time?" Pam asked, sounding far more relieved than Eric expected.

"Yeah. We went to the library so Sookie could start working on your research demonstration, and then we had a bite at Dairy Queen for lunch. I invited her to tea, but she needed to get home and start getting ready for services," Eric explained as he took his usual seat at the roundtable.

The three siblings poured their cups as they began discussing their day. Eventually, the subject came full circle, and the topic was back on to Eric and Sookie.

"I'm sorry," Godric told his brother. "It was wrong of me to bring all that crap up over breakfast."

Eric absorbed the apology a moment before he smiled, "It was something we were going to talk about eventually. I was more bothered by what you seem to think of me."

"It's not true, the things I said, or how I said them," said Godric. "Pam and I talked while you were gone, and I know that I wasn't fair to you at all. I wasn't even accurate about you."

"Like I said," Eric sighed, "Sookie and I worked through everything. Yes, we are officially dating. We even discussed a little about what we would do when I leave for college."

"You're really serious about her," Pam whispered, and he could hear the heartbreak as well as the acceptance in her voice.

"I really am," Eric told her. "I don't even know what about her makes me so serious. All I know is that she keeps my ego in check in the best way. She's grounded and beautiful and…" He looked at his sister regretfully.

Pam shrugged, "Listen, you guys were right. She's obviously straight, and I can't change that. It's better this way. I'd never pant after my brother's girlfriend, and the idea of kissing a girl who's had your penis in her mouth is an automatic turn off."

Eric chuckled and shook his head, "Well, it'll probably be awhile before there's any genital touching, but that's good to know." Pam raised her eyebrows in surprise at her brother. "It's been a long time since I've connected to anyone," Eric admitted ruefully. "I don't want to risk confusing a connection with being physically connected."

Pam frowned as she considered this, "It's been so long since she's had any sort of friend… Socially,

she's playing a lot of catch up. I bet she doesn't know much about connecting with people either." She looked at her oldest brother. "Got any analysis this time?"

Godric blushed. After his purposefully appalling insight earlier that day, he was hesitant to make another observation. "I guess, the only thing I could suggest is to move at her pace. Let her set the speed, but don't let her push herself too hard too fast. Make sure she knows that you're not just acting patient with her."

"What do you mean?" Eric asked curiously.

"Well, always reassuring Sookie could make her think she's holding you back. Always saying 'it's all right,' or 'I don't mind' could make her acknowledge that what is happening is abnormal and an inconvenience. Instead, you might want to try expressing enjoyment of the situation rather than draw attention to how it is different."

Pam injected suddenly, "Women want to know that you're enjoying their company. It's as simple as that. We don't want to feel like you're putting up with us."

"But I do like spending time with her," Eric frowned. "I've never felt like I was putting up with anything."

"I guess you have nothing to worry about then," Pam shrugged. "She's got the hots for you, and you like spending time together. Those are the two most important things. Attraction and being able to stand one another. Look at Mom and our father. They were nothing alike, but they were super in love. Even if he was a major ass to everyone else, including his children, that doesn't negate the fact that he loved Mom."

Both brothers paused to begrudgingly accept their sister's point. There was a silence that followed as all three considered the frustration that their father could be so distant toward them but so open with their mother.

{†}

"Ready?" Eric laughed as he pulled into a parking space at the high school. Sookie's mouth was stretched into a tight smile as her boyfriend jumped from his seat and came around to open her door for her. Pam was sitting in the back of the Acura, having insisted that Eric and Sookie ride up front together.

There were already people staring at Eric since he had a little fan club of girls who mooned over him. That was why, before the new couple could even walk into the school, the halls were already buzzing about the two of them holding hands as they walked through the parking lot.

"Well, that didn't take long, did it?" Eric laughed as he lazily swung his and Sookie's hands between them. His girlfriend looked up at him nervously as she could already hear everyone gossiping about the unfairly matched pair. She couldn't bring herself to confess that she'd already been subjected to the beginnings of the rumors at church the evening before.

"I saw them having lunch together yesterday," Amber muttered to her friend.

"So, Homecoming wasn't a pity date?" her friend, Dawn, asked in surprise.

"I guess Baby Stackhouse puts out as easily as her brother," Amber cackled.

"Who the hell was fucking her to get her good enough to land the new guy?" Dawn moaned with

disappointment.

Sookie honed in on several different conversations before discovering that the general consensus was that she was such a good lay it had gotten her a boyfriend. This rumor was going to get ugly fast. She just knew it…

"I'll see you after third period," Eric promised as he arrived at the girls' homeroom. They had decided to split up the classes they walked together so that Pam had a few chances to have open girl time with her friend. Eric had agreed to this arrangement begrudgingly.

Sookie smiled up at him despite the concern she felt about the growing rumors. When he leaned in to kiss her goodbye, she turned her cheek at the last moment, and he only caught the corner of her mouth.

"You okay?" he asked comfortingly. Sookie nodded stiffly, and he smiled. "We'll be old news in no time, Sookie. Don't worry about it."

Unfortunately, Sookie had her doubts about Eric's reassurance. After eight years, people still found new and creative ways to poke fun at her. She calculated that they would be 'old news' once they moved away, or if they broke up. Those were the only options she could see to end the murmuring.

 _Well,_ she thought with a sigh, _better to lean into the skid_. With that, she smiled, lifted onto her toes and stole a kiss from her boyfriend. Eric froze in surprise at her sudden confidence in kissing him but recovered when he saw that her cheeks were glowing.

"Trying to prove something?" Eric guessed at her rosy cheeks. She raised her hand in that so-so gesture that always made him chuckle. "Fine by me!" he laughed as he waved goodbye and headed to his own homeroom.

"Ew, you kissed my brother in front of me," Pam fake gagged, making Sookie smile.

" _Get used to it,"_ Sookie scribbled quickly and stuck her tongue out at Pam for good measure.

"Someone's getting sassy," Pam chortled as they went to their seats and ignored Mrs. Fleures while she talked about the upcoming week, and the next round of school events.

" _I realized that the rumors and stuff don't stop, so it's a waste of energy chasing them down and trying to correct them. Everyone believes I slept with Eric after Homecoming, so what does it matter if they see me kiss him?"_ Sookie turned the notebook over for Pam to read and her friend frowned at what she saw there.

"Want me to kick their asses?" Pam asked.

Sookie shook her head, " _No! Just leave it alone. It's definitely not worth it."_

Pam shrugged, and the girls finally focused on homeroom announcements. When first period was

finally going to begin, the girls walked with each other to class.

"I guarantee she put holes in the rubber," Crystal accused.

"I wouldn't put it past her to pregnancy trap him," Dawn agreed cattily, glaring at Sookie as she passed.

"She's hooking up with an heir of the Beauchéne fortune. Of course, she'll try and get knocked up," Maudette continued on. Sookie had to drag Pam the rest of the way to her class to avoid a fight.

 _But the rumors do settle down,_ Sookie told herself comfortingly as she ignored Pam's yowling as she dragged her to the next room. The quiet girl was experiencing a revelation despite the obscenities her friend was uttering. Sure, she still got picked on for her silence and bullied quite regularly for the same reason. However, it lost its edge after a while. Either your heart hardens, or the blows lose some of their sharpness; she wasn't sure which was the case. People seemed to become less intent out of tedium. Even if the rumors never stopped, they would cease hurting eventually.

 _Maybe I want to move away from here,_ Sookie considered as she settled into the first class. She wasn't sure that she could ever forgive Bon Temps.

 _But what would I do for money?_ Her brain prodded her to think. _Am I going to get knocked up like everyone is saying?_

 _Of course not!_ Sookie snarled at herself. A strange rattle came from her throat, and it made both her and the boy next to her jump. Steven Duff stared at Sookie in shock. He'd never heard a single sound from the girl his entire school career, and now he could have sworn a growl had just rolled out of her.

 _Then what would I do?_ Sookie wondered, ignoring the involuntary sound. They'd been coming more often now, but they were just unintentional noises. A small part of her felt a little thrill when they happened, but her inability to make them on purpose was disheartening.

 _What would I do?_ Sookie's hand began to move along her paper in another vine-y doodle. She'd wanted to be an artist, but that seemed precisely what Dr. Jones had said: a means to remain silent.

 _But if my voice never comes back? What will I do?_ After eight years, it seemed stupid to hold any hope that she'd miraculously start speaking. Even just… A little bit, she found herself wishing for the first time in so long. To be able to say 'yes' or 'no.' To let her Gran hear, 'I love you,' from her lips. Just once, being able to finally tell Jason, 'I am sorry.' There were so many things she wished she could say-

"Sookie," Mr. Thompson tore her away from her thoughts, "what are you doing?"

Looking sheepishly at her doodle, Sookie moved her hand in silent confession to daydreaming.

"Pay attention," he scowled, "or I'll give you your midterm exam right now."

Sookie grimaced and turned over a fresh sheet in her notebook. Mr. Thompson seemed appeased by this and went back to his lecture.

It only took a minute out of the spotlight before Sookie's mind began to wander. Purposefully, she put her pencil down so she couldn't be caught drawing again.

 _What can I do without a voice?_ She began to consider. _What will get me out of Bon Temps?_

The idea of leaving her Gran and brother behind wasn't a welcome one, but at the same time, Sookie

wasn't sure she could stay in the small town forever. After everything she'd been through and all the things she'd listened to people say about her, it was difficult to let it go. The fact that her only friends were from out of town was more proof that there was happiness available to her out in the world if she was only brave enough to go looking for it.

 _Maybe I could learn to sign?_ Sookie contemplated as the bell rang for the end of the first period and

she packed up her materials to meet Pam before her next class.

 _Eric signs,_ Sookie remembered Pam mentioning that the first day they'd met. A sense of exhilaration came over Sookie at spending her afternoons learning to use sign language. _And a bigger city probably has more people in it that can sign than a small town would,_ she reasoned.

Before she knew it, her third class was ending, and Sookie was finally going to see Eric for the first time since arriving at school. She saw him all but running down the hallway to greet her like a bodyguard who had been previously dismissed.

"Hey!" Eric leaned down to kiss her cheek. "How were your morning classes?"

She gave him a thumbs up as she opened her notebook, " _Can you teach me to use sign language?"_

Her boyfriend stared a moment before he smiled, "Of course. What made you want to start learning it?" He took her other books from her so she could write and walk more easily.

" _I don't want to stay in Bon Temps. If I lived in the city, there would be more people who knew sign language, right?"_ she asked.

"Well," Eric was thoughtful, "there would definitely be a better chance of you meeting more people with hearing or speech impairments in the city. Are you all right, Sookie?" he asked worriedly. "I've heard a lot of bullshit today. Is that what has you so set on leaving town?"

Sookie nodded slowly.

"We'll work on sign language," Eric promised. He hoped that all she needed was some independence from her notebook. It would be a shame to have her feel like she needed to be uprooted from her hometown, mainly when her grandmother and her brother were all that she really had in the world.

{†}

"Don't forget to move your lips when you sign, Sookie," Eric encouraged several weeks later. He had been practicing sign language with his girlfriend for nearly a month, and she had almost learned all of the notecards for the science demonstration next week. Sookie really wanted to surprise Dr. Jones with her speech. Pam would do the speaking, and Sookie would sign alongside her.

" _Why?"_ She both signed and moved her mouth.

Eric shrugged, "Because I don't want you to give up on speaking. I'm happy to see you embrace sign language, but I'd be sad if you were using it as another way to avoid having hope."

Sookie let a stream of air rustle her hair. " _Okay."_

As far as the 'boyfriend & girlfriend' commentary went, Sookie had to admit that it wasn't nearly as complicated as she had been lead to believe. The only thing that really changed was that she spent half her visit after school with Pam and the other half with Eric. They talked about perfectly ordinary and mundane things like plans after high school, what they wanted to do over the weekend, and classes that were being troublesome.

Sookie tapped her boyfriend's shoulder as he pored over her notecards to give the next sign. She'd already mastered the alphabet, numbers, days of the week and months. Sookie had a vast array of verbs to choose from and was making up little nicknames for her family and friends.

"Hmm?" Eric looked up at her.

Deciding to take a break from signing, Sookie grabbed her nearby notebook, " _We're doing everything girlfriends and boyfriends do, right?"_

"What do you mean?" Eric asked. His heart pounded at the question. He'd already told her sex was off the table for a long while, but they had officially been seeing each other longer than he'd ever dated a girl before sleeping with her. Her question ignited a rather interesting response to the rest of his body.

" _It doesn't feel any different than what I do with Pam,"_ Sookie explained.

Eric couldn't help but imagine Sookie and his sister acting like a couple, and the idea splashed cold water over his racing heart.

Smiling a bit, Eric explained, "The most important part of the word girlfriend or boyfriend is the word 'friend,' Sookie. Boyfriends and girlfriends do all the same things regular friends do, they just get more perks."

" _Like sex?"_

 _How can she ask that without blushing!?_ Eric panicked. _Shit, is she thinking about sex!?_

"Well, yeah, but… Not necessarily. Some people wait until marriage to have sex, but they're still… Emotionally intimate, I guess? No one doubts that they're a couple just because they're not sleeping together," Eric became thoughtful. "It's the opposite, I guess, of friends with benefits. You have sex, but you're not really in love or anything. You like them well enough, but you can't really see it beyond that. You don't look at that person and think of them as your partner. I don't know how to explain it!" he confessed. _Relationships are complicated._

" _How do I know if you're more than just a friend to me?"_ Sookie asked.

Eric chuckled, "You hold Pam's hand from time to time, right?" Sookie nodded. "What feels different when she holds your hand versus when I hold your hand?" _There's the blush I've been waiting for!_ He grinned as her face went red.

" _When Pam holds my hand, I feel like I'm being lead somewhere. When you hold my hand, I feel like I'm going somewhere with you. I like when your thumb rubs against my hand, or when you bring it to your lips to kiss just because you feel like it."_

"What else, Sookie?" Eric asked. _Am I finding this erotic?_ He wondered in surprise at reading her words.

" _The way I catch you watching me looks like you're trying your hardest not to stare, but you can't help it. That makes me feel special and beautiful. That look assures me that the people that spread rumors about us have no clue what they're talking about."_

"You are special and very beautiful," Eric agreed.

Placing his hand over hers and leaning in, Eric pressed his mouth to hers, and Sookie shivered as his tongue encouraged her to open her mouth. For the first time, their tongues tangled together rather than briefly touch. He could feel Sookie's breath quicken, and his body moved around hers to keep her from escaping their kiss.

Slowly, he could feel his girlfriend's mood igniting. Her body grew warmer in his arms. Her hands came to tangle in his hair, and her knees hugged his hips as they continued to allow their tongues to dance. When her breathing accelerated, he could feel her breasts thrust briefly against his chest. The feeling of them made Eric lean in closer, settling more of his weight atop her.

"Ah," he felt her little sound in his mouth and pulled away to look down at Sookie's rosy face.

"That's a new sound," Eric grinned down at her. "Was that a good sound?" Sookie nodded slowly, her eyes glazing slightly. "I wonder what other sounds I could get out of you," He leaned in for another kiss, and Sookie felt a new sensation as a hardness pressed against her stomach.

He couldn't help it. Sookie's questions, their conversations and then that little 'ah'! How was he supposed to contain an erection when his mostly silent girlfriend managed to utter a pleasurable noise from a bit of kissing!?

Sookie's hips tilted, pressing his erection tighter between their bodies, and Eric finally pulled away. "Don't…" He sat up and turned away, careful to place his hand over hers in hopes that she wouldn't feel upset or rejected. _I just can't handle the pressure,_ he thought dazedly.

Sitting up slowly as well, Sookie brought her hands up. " _Are you okay?"_

"Yeah," Eric nodded slowly. "I just wasn't prepared to feel like that." He let out a strained laugh that wasn't quite from embarrassment but definitely wasn't jovial. "Sorry about that."

" _I don't mind,"_ and then she pointed to his bulge which made Eric feel a thrum in his groin.

It was at that moment that Eric realized something about Sookie that had remained hidden up until this point. There had been a moment during their first date to the library when he had suspected it, but now he was sure.

"You read romance novels, don't you?" He accused playfully.

" _So?"_

Eric chuckled and shook his head, "Fair warning, real sex is hardly like what they say in books."

Sookie reached for the notebook which could only mean she was going to be using words she hadn't learned in ASL just yet. " _A lot of girls don't seem to enjoy it nearly as much as guys do in real life."_

"Why do you say that?"

" _Girls complain about it a lot. Guys coming really fast, or it not feeling good when they're doing it,"_ Sookie explained.

"I'll probably come like a freight train when we get there," Eric confessed with a laugh. "Especially if I get those noises out of you on the day."

" _So, if we're waiting until after you start college, what's your time frame for playing?"_ Sookie asked.

Eric thought for a moment before he shrugged, "I mean since I put the boundaries on sex, would you like to set the time frame for playing?"

Sookie shook her head, " _I don't know what I'm missing. This whole thing seems a lot more important to you than it does to me."_

 _Ouch!_ Eric flinched. "You know why it's important to me though, right?" he asked.

" _Because you don't want to ruin Pam's friendship with me-"_

"And-"

Sookie placed her hand over his lips as she continued writing on a new line, " _It takes me longer to speak, Eric. Don't cut me off."_ Her boyfriend slumped at her point and waited patiently for her to finish writing.

" _I know that you have some inkling of faith in us, so you don't have to worry so much about me doubting that. Besides, if something were to break us up, with or without sex, it would hurt one or both of us. With or without sex in my relationship with you, there's always the risk that it could hurt the relationship I have with Pam. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate that you want us to take our time. I do appreciate it because even if I don't mind getting rubbed by your hard on, it doesn't mean I'm ready for sex or messing around. I'm not."_

Sookie looked up at him expectantly as he read her message. When he took a moment to respond, she grew nervous that she might have presumed a lot more than she realized.

"I never really saw it like that," Eric whispered. "Maybe I was using Pam as an excuse to avoid sex." Before she could sign or her lips could move, Eric could read the 'Why' in her eyes. "I'm really trying to be different than I was, Sookie. I guess I'm trying to grow up?"

Sookie smiled as she took up her pen, " _That's fine. I got a lot of growing up to do too. You at least have an idea of what you want to study in college. I haven't even figured out if I want to go to college."_

"Maybe you'll end up writing romance novels?" Eric teased. "I can be your book cover model."

Sookie rolled her eyes, " _Your ego is showing."_

"What? You don't think women would flock to read a book with me on the cover?" Eric asked jokingly. "Seriously, though, what's the appeal of romance novels?"

Sookie was thoughtful a moment before she explained, " _It always seemed like the women are either shy and antisocial, extremely prideful, or really snide and full of themselves. Even though I have no voice, I still try to be kind and sociable. I guess it gave me hope that even though no one around here really likes me, someone somewhere would. It encouraged me to keep being myself, I guess."_

"You can be pretty shy," Eric pointed out as he read her response. "Although, I haven't really seen that side of you in a while."

" _Since I met you and your family, it's not so nerve-wracking finally getting to socialize,"_ Sookie told him. " _You guys never made me self-conscious about the way I have to communicate. I've just never had anyone get to know me. I thought I was shy, too."_

Eric began playing with the ends of Sookie's hair as they talked. She would look over her shoulder at him, causing the lock to tug momentarily in his fingertips, and she would smile at his attention to her hair.

"I've gotten to try on a lot of personalities. Moving around so much let me do that. The only people who knew me when we moved were my siblings. Every time I started a new school, I got to be someone new," Eric told her as he examined the ends of her hair. "I'm good looking, and smart enough to do well in school. It was always easy to try on new versions of myself because of it. You want to know my favorite personality?"

Sookie looked at him curiously.

"Being Pam's older brother and Godric's younger brother. You were the first person who ever saw me the way I am with my family," Eric told her. "You got under all my layers. It wasn't because Pam snuck you into the house. It wasn't because the first time I saw you my heart leaped into my throat. It was the way you listened to what we talked about. I knew that a fake personality wouldn't work on you. You'd see right through my bullshit."

" _How'd you figure that?"_ Sookie wondered.

"Because it felt so good to be listened to," Eric smiled that sweet smile of his she'd only ever seen when it was just the two of them. "It felt good to have someone care about who I really am, and not whatever mask I was wearing that day."

" _Your face is so much more beautiful than any mask."_

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **P.S: There are actually two Lord Byron poems that are referenced in the first half of Martian Chronicles. One is** _ **So We'll Go No More A'roving.**_ **The other is** _ **She Walks in Beauty**_ **. I just had a feeling someone would point that out if I didn't!**

 **-Andi**


	7. Chapter 7

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Seven: Tasteless Thanksgiving**

"Are you ready yet?" Eric groaned at his sister who was still preparing for their Thanksgiving with the Stackhouse family.

"Fine, fine," Pam grumbled as she flicked her lashes with one last coat of mascara and finally rose from her vanity. "You know, Mrs. Stackhouse said we didn't have to be there right at one."

"They were kind enough to let us join in their Thanksgiving, Pam," Godric called from his room. His sister's voice had a habit of carrying. "Otherwise it would be the three of us, and you'd get stuck with most of the cooking. Be thankful."

Pam huffed as she slipped her shoes on and followed Eric out into the hall. Godric emerged from his room, straightening his tie.

"Is this really going to be a tie situation?" Eric groaned as he saw his brother holding another one in his hand.

"If Jason isn't wearing one when we get there then we can take them off," Godric promised as his younger, but taller, brother leaned down for him to tie his noose.

Eric resigned himself to the situation as his older brother knotted his tie and clapped his shoulder for a signal of finality. After that, the siblings made their way downstairs, and out onto the front lawn. What they did not expect was to see a brunette woman stepping out of her sleek, red sedan.

"Can we help you?" Godric called to the mysterious woman in the lovely, flowing dress.

"Are you the Northman children?" the woman called as she came closer to the front steps.

"Who wants to know?" Eric asked with a frown.

"I'm Maryann Northman! Your aunt!"

{†}

Sookie stood anxiously near the door, smoothing the front of her dress and fussing with her hair. Every so often she'd get sidetracked with straightening a throw pillow or folding the corner of one of the afghans over the back of the couch. Then she would be back at the door, craning her neck to see if her friends were coming.

"What's her deal?" Hadley grumbled from the couch. She couldn't believe her mother had dragged her to Gran's house again. She'd hoped after last year's fiasco; she'd be banned from all future family gatherings.

"Her boyfriend and his family are joining us for dinner, Hadley," Linda sighed as she reminded her daughter for the third time about the dinner party.

"Are you feeling alright, Dear?" Gran asked of Hadley as she came in with a platter of crudites.

"Fan-fucking-tastic," Hadley rolled her eyes and slumped further into the couch.

"Hadley Delahousse!" Gran snapped, but her granddaughter didn't even flinch. "You better remember your manners when the other guests arrive!"

"Yeah, whatever," Hadley scowled.

Linda placed her head in her hand, and Sookie could have sworn she heard her begin to count slowly.

Rather than focus on the drama in the living room, Sookie instead pressed her face against the glass of the door before realizing it would leave an imprint of her makeup. Panicking, she ran to grab the Windex and a paper towel.

On her way back to the door, the phone rang, and Sookie's hand shot out to answer without even thinking. When the receiver was at her mouth, Sookie froze and then began looking around for help.

 _"Hello?"_ Godric's voice came over the phone.

 _Crap! What do I do!?_ Sookie did the only thing she could think of and pressed a number on the keypad, so a **BEEEEP** came over the line.

There was a short pause and then a chuckle, _"Sookie, did you answer the phone? Beep once for 'yes.'"_ She pressed the button again. _"Go get Gran. I'll wait."_

Running back to the living room, Sookie pointed at Gran and held her hand up to her head like she was taking a call.

"Sookie, did the phone ring?" Gran asked her as Sookie bounced into the living room.

"And _you_ answered it?" Hadley snorted with a laugh. "What'd you do? Forget you were a mute?"

"Shut up, Hadley," Jason groaned.

"Don't be rude, Jason," Gran chastised as she headed for the kitchen.

"I'll stop being rude when Hadley shuts up," Jason called.

"Manwhore," Hadley snapped at her cousin.

"Junkie," Jason retaliated without pause.

"Red neck," Hadley shot back.

"Prostitute."

"Dick face."

"You'd know all about dicks in your face," Jason pointed out lazily.

Hadley retorted by throwing a pillow at Jason's head from which he easily tilted his face away. Sookie quickly picked the cushion back up and put it back in its proper place.

"Listen up, everyone!" Gran called as she returned from the kitchen. "Godric's aunt has apparently shown up for Thanksgiving, but since we've already invited the family, I told him to bring her along. Now, none of us have met Maryann, so I want everyone on their best behavior!"

Sookie was the only one in the room who didn't glare at Hadley, but the black sheep of the family was pretty sure it was because she was too busy wiping down the front door window.

 _Eric said they never even met their father's sister,_ Sookie thought to herself curiously. As far as any of them knew, Maryann just disappeared when she was 16, and their father never saw her again.

Sookie managed to do one more round of straightening up before Eric's family arrived at their front door. She made sure not to swing the doors open too swiftly, and smiled politely at their Aunt Maryann as she came into the house. Maryann gave Sookie the sweetest of smiles as she passed through. Sookie paused at the aunt's pleasant expression. It reminded her of a more refined way Sookie herself smiled most days. An attempt to be charming while simultaneously uncomfortable. Maryann had apparently been practicing her smile for quite some time.

"You must be Maryann," Gran greeted the stranger graciously. "Please, come in. There are some appetizers in the living room, and dinner will be finishing up in about an hour." Gran ushered the unexpected guest into the living room and began gesturing around the room. "That young man there is my grandson Jason. Those two ladies are my daughter, Linda, and her daughter, Hadley. The young lady who is right behind you is my granddaughter, Sookie."

Maryann glanced behind her shoulder at Sookie, and the young woman felt like she'd just had her cheeks licked by a roaring fire. The smile on Maryann's lips made the younger girl's heart beat quickly. For whatever reason, her boyfriend's aunt seemed to take an instant interest in Sookie. Usually, the silent girl would have thought that pleasant smile directed at her was suspicious, but if Maryann was related to Pam, then perhaps Northmans just had an immediate liking for her? This thought waged war with the previous look that Maryann had worn. Unsure which expression to believe, Sookie waited silently for more evidence.

Suddenly, Maryann's demeanor changed as she focused solely on Sookie, and everyone was stunned as she signed, _"Hello, Sookie."_

 _"I'm not deaf. You can talk to me,"_ Sookie signaled back.

"Sorry, I know only that little bit," Maryann mumbled to Gran. "What did she say?"

"She said," Eric boomed, "that she isn't deaf and that you can talk to her like normal."

 _"Did you tell her I sign?"_ Sookie asked of Eric.

 _"No. I told her we were having dinner at my girlfriend's house,"_ Eric replied.

"It's not polite to have side conversations like that," Maryann chastised.

"Sookie can't speak," Gran explained. "Eric's been teaching her to use sign language these past couple months."

"But she's not deaf?" Maryann asked again.

"No, not at all," Gran cleared her throat uncomfortably. She wasn't sure what this woman's fixation with Sookie was, but it was unsettling. "Please, sit. Would you like something to drink? There's tea, ginger ale, water-"

"If you have a dry red, that would be fine," Maryann told her.

"I have a cabernet?" Gran offered reluctantly. She'd prefer not to serve alcohol in front of Hadley.

"That's fine," Maryann waved her hand at Gran, and Jason found himself sitting up straighter in his chair. He didn't like the woman treating his Gran like a waitress.

As his grandmother left the room, Jason stood from his seat and followed her into the kitchen. "I got it, Gran." He took the corkscrew and bottle from her to start opening it.

"Are you alright, Jason?" Gran asked, touching his arm consolingly.

"I don't like that Aunt," Jason admitted in a low voice. "She just shows up at a stranger's house, tries to bond with Sookie and then orders you around like a staff member?"

"I want to know why she thought Sookie was deaf in the first place?" Gran confessed as she took the open bottle from her grandson and began hunting down a wine glass. She didn't bother letting the wine breathe before sloshing it into a glass and handing it to Jason to serve their guest. Jason begrudgingly followed Adele back to the living room and heard the mysterious aunt's voice beginning her tale.

"I've been looking for my brother's family for years now," Maryann Northman's voice was saying to Linda as Jason and Adele returned to the living room together. "If I hadn't been in New York around the time he died, I wouldn't have even known where to begin looking for anyone! If his walk in front of a car hadn't caused such a huge traffic jam, I doubt his death would have made it beyond the obituaries."

Sookie looked to Pam whose face had tightened into a sour expression.

"Our mother died of cancer that same week," Eric injected. "Would you like to make light of that too?"

Maryann's face softened, "I didn't know your mother at all. I would never have a thing to say about her, but my brother was a piece of work. Are you saying he changed at all? I remember him as selfish, cold, and dismissive."

"Remind you of anyone else?" Jason grumbled in Sookie's ear as he passed her. His sister's face squished down to repress a smirk.

"Even if our father wasn't the best one out there," Eric continued, "at least we spent more than six years with him. Kids are greedy and stubborn. Are you going to pretend you knew a thing about him just because you knew him as a child?"

That you-poor-kid look on Maryann's face only grew more prominent at Eric's uncharacteristic defense of his father. "You're defending the man who killed himself and left his kids to fend for themselves?" Maryann stared. For the first time Sookie could remember, she wanted to slap someone.

"You know," Hadley sighed, annoyed with the situation, "I really couldn't give a shit about any of you. Regardless, you shouldn't talk about all this in front of another family who've lost their mom and dad. Some people are sensitive about that kinda shit." Hadley stood up from her seat.

"Hadley, where are you going?" Linda asked anxiously.

"To smoke a joint. Wanna come?" Hadley grinned darkly.

"Hadley!" Linda gasped.

"Suit yourself," Hadley shrugged and headed for the door.

"Is Hadley not using heroin anymore?" Jason asked in surprise.

"Not since May, as far as I know," Linda mumbled.

"Well, heck, I'd take her using weed over needles any day of the week," Jason nodded approvingly.

"She's still using drugs," Linda snapped.

"Yeah, well at least she's not gonna get AIDS from a joint," Jason pointed out. "Although, I wonder if she's more likely to have a relapse if she's smoking pot?"

Maryann stared at the family members, seemingly annoyed to have been forgotten during the young woman's argument and somewhat unorthodox departure from the group. Eric, however, was staring at his girlfriend in concern. She had seemed to lose focus on the conversation when Hadley had spoken up.

Tapping Sookie's shoulder, Eric asked, _"It still really hurts, doesn't it?"_ Sookie slowly nodded, having nowhere near the number of words she needed to express her feelings on the situation. Eric felt lost momentarily as he absorbed the guilt that shimmered around her like a foreboding aura. In the past months Eric had suspected that his girlfriend carried a heavy burden of survivor's remorse. He wished he could take that weight from her shoulders. _"It wasn't your fault."_

Sookie's head lowered as she refused to accept his assurances. If she could remember the day of the crash, maybe it would be easier to believe.

Without meaning to be so forward in front of their families, Eric was already reaching for Sookie. An urge to bring Sookie reassurance and comfort outweighed the faux pas of the intimate kiss he gave his girlfriend. It wasn't one of their school worthy pecks on the lips. It wasn't a kiss of desire like the ones they had exchanged in his bedroom. This kiss was a flood of protectiveness. Sookie felt marked by this lips as if they had put a good luck charm on her. For a moment, she felt like he was blessing her, cleansing her of any and all wrongdoings.

As his mouth left hers, Sookie found herself wanting the moment to last a moment longer. She wanted to continue feeling that sense of absolution, and her brain fixated on keeping Eric and his lips within reach."Eh," Sookie found her throat close as he pulled away. Far more than the pleasurable 'ah' while they made out the previous week, Eric was filled with happiness. The first sound of his name had managed to slip past her lips.

"My name?" he asked hopefully. She nodded in embarrassment. "Best moment of my life so far." She looked up at him shyly as he said this, hardly daring to hope that he was honest. There was doubt in her mind that the sound had been voluntary. It felt more like a sob, much like when she listened to Pam playing the viola. However, if that simple, little noise could give Eric that much happiness, why would she take it from him with her doubts?

Adele watched the young couple with her heart pounding. In eight years, she hadn't heard her daughter utter a sound that wasn't out of pain or sadness. To listen to her voice sound out of love or appreciation was the greatest gift. That small sound was one of the greatest moments in Adele's long life. For the first time in a long time, Adele finally had hoped she would hear her granddaughter speak again.

Maryann sat sipping her glass of wine and watching the events around her unfold. _I waited too long_ , she realized in annoyance. She had known if she suddenly appeared after her brother's death that her nephews and niece would be suspicious of her timing at trying to enter their lives. Unfortunately, when they had left New York and moved to Bon Temps, Maryann had believed they would take a while to transition to their new home. _I should have realized they would adapt faster from transferring around as kids_. She scowled a bit as she took another swallow of the cheap cabernet. The worst part was that her private investigator had severely misjudged her younger nephew's girlfriend. She'd gone and made a fool out of herself, having already come up with the excuse of recognizing little telltale signs that the girl was deaf. She wasn't deaf at all, and now everyone was wondering why she had used ASL in the first place.

 _Maybe it's not even worth the attempt_ , Maryann thought miserably. Ever since she was sixteen years old, she'd been a master at conning grown men out of their hard-earned money. The woman had figured it would be a cakewalk to convince her brother's children to let her manage the household while they finished school. By the time they were all done with school, she would have siphoned every last penny of their inheritance and vanished before anyone knew what had happened.

The problem was, her charisma always tended to lean toward the sexual end of the spectrum, and she wasn't quite as adept at getting her way by other means. On occasion, she managed to form a kinship that didn't revolve around sex, but those were temporary roles with the children of the men she swindled. She was good at playing the 'fun girlfriend' that kids loved, but ever since she had met with her nephews and niece, she felt like a gate had closed between them. They wanted nothing to do with her. Getting along with her wouldn't appease a soul, and they knew it.

Whether her brother's children suspected what her intentions were or not, it was evident that a short burst of friendship wouldn't get her what she wanted. The children had already allied with one another. She'd have a hard time breaking it without leverage, and Eric's girlfriend had been meant to become that leverage. Thanks to a lazy private investigator, though, that possibility seemed far less attainable. Sookie was suspicious of her too. She'd never be able to drive in that wedge now.

In a last-ditch effort, Maryann had tried to bond over anger toward her brother, but that too had been fruitless. Their suspicion of her was not allowing the Northmans to create any sort of rapport with their aunt.

"Would you like another glass of wine, Maryann?" Adele asked politely, interrupting the woman's musings.

"I suppose," the woman thrust her glass at Adele and Jason had finally had enough.

"Well, y'all must've gotten your manners from your mama, 'cause it definitely didn't come from your daddy's side," Jason snarled. Pam smirked, and both Godric and Eric flinched. "M'am, if you don't start showing your hostess some respect, I'll have to ask you to leave our house."

"Jason!" Adele scolded.

Maryann raised her eyebrows at the threat, "Are you saying your manners are better than mine?"

"Nope, I'm a total asshole," Jason replied. "That's why I'm speaking up for everyone else."

"Jason Corb-"

"Gran," Jason looked at his grandmother with a stern expression on his face, "you can smile politely, but I won't let anyone walk over you." Moving his gaze from Gran to their unwanted guest, Jason stared the stranger down. "I'm just gonna say exactly what you need to hear, lady." Maryanne raised her eyebrows at him expectantly. "Godric, Eric, and Pam don't control their inheritance. A lawyer up north does. They don't get a real dime to themselves for at least another six years."

Rising from her seat, Maryann sighed and walked to the door, "Well you've certainly saved me some deliberating."

"What are you talking about?" Godric asked coldly, and Maryann smiled at the look in his eyes.

"You already know the answer to that, don't you, Godric?" Maryann assured him.

"You wanted to get to our inheritance," Godric acknowledged. He'd had a sinking suspicion, but hadn't wanted to push away their last remaining relative out of paranoia.

"Bingo," Maryann snapped her fingers. "Seeing as it would involve a lot more effort than I'm willing to utilize, I guess I'll just cut my losses."

Sookie looked at Eric in surprise and concern, but her boyfriend seemed less than impressed by the turn of events. She could have sworn that he looked relieved.

"Well, then I happily ask you to get the fuck out," Jason laughed as he bounced ahead of her to open the door. "Don't let it hit ya on the way out!"

When their aunt had left, the Northmans looked at one another uncomfortably before launching into immediate apologies to their hosts.

"I won't hear it," Adele waved off their apologies. "You were giving your family a chance, and they just wanted to hurt you. You have nothing to apologize for."

Before things could get any more awkward, Pam rose and announced, "I'm going to check on Hadley. If she left because of our aunt, I'd like to make sure she's alright."

Gran gave the girl a grateful smile. "Remind her that dinner will be ready in about twenty minutes."

Pam nodded as she stepped outside. Looking around a moment, Pam decided the best place for having a joint would probably be downwind of the house, so she headed toward the woods.

"Hadley?" Pam called.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be back in a minute," Hadley grumbled from behind a large fir tree.

Pam paused as the girl came into view. As her friend's cousin came closer, Pam sniffed her hair. She smelled saturated in perfume, but there was no lingering odor of marijuana.

"Did you shoot up?" Pam accused.

"The fuck do you care?" Hadley pushed past her to head for the house, and Pam caught her wrist. "Let go."

"You're not high."

"Mark it on the calendar," Hadley snapped, trying to yank her hand back.

"How long have you been sober?" Pam asked.

Realizing that this stranger wasn't going to let up, Hadley sighed, "Since May."

"Why are you letting your mom think that you still smoke pot if you're not on anything?"

Hadley scoffed, "You wouldn't get it."

"I get hiding things about myself," Pam assured her lazily. "If you don't want to talk about it, you can say so, but you haven't told me it's none of my business."

Hadley stared at her cousin's friend for a moment before she rolled her eyes and sat down in the cold grass. "You promise not to tell anyone?"

Pam had to admit this was the first time someone had made her promise not to tell that they weren't using drugs, but she nodded in agreement.

"Gran's sent me to rehab once already," Hadley whispered. "Paid for it out of her pocket even though she's gotta raise my cousins by herself… And I failed. I mean, completely failed. I wasn't back from rehab two days before I was using again."

"But you're clean now," Pam pointed out encouragingly.

"I had a miscarriage back in May," Hadley whispered. "I didn't even know I was two months pregnant. I didn't know who the father was. Fuck, I didn't even know that I'd slept with anyone at that time. I just knew the God-awful cramping, and the fever was enough that I went to the ER. They told me I was having a miscarriage. I'd killed my baby I didn't even know I had."

Pam sat quietly beside the woman as she listened to her confession.

"I wasted my Gran's money, and I killed my baby," Hadley continued as she looked out into the sky that was turning a beautiful, burnt orange. "So, I decided if I were going to quit, I wouldn't burden anyone else I knew with it. I got a job at a gas station, and I always told my mom my shifts were an hour longer than they were. I'd go to addiction groups either before or after my shift. After I hit my first thirty days, I guess I was scared I'd jinx myself if I told anyone. Maybe I'd get their expectations too high."

Hadley let out a long sigh as if a giant weight had finally come off her shoulders. "So I showed you mine. You gonna show me yours?"

Pam flinched, "Well, I'm not entirely alone in mine. My brothers know, and it's less about overcoming and more about accepting."

"Oh, just spit it out," Hadley rolled her eyes before staring at Pam expectantly.

"I'm a lesbian, and I never grew the backbone to tell my parents before they died. Also, I was pretty in love with Sookie for awhile," Pam confessed.

"Yeah, I totally kick your ass at demons in the closet," Hadley commented as she looked out at the landscape once again. "But, I guess it can't be easy figuring out all that crap, and you did come out to your brothers eventually. That had to be hard."

Pam shrugged, "They love me. It was harder seeing my brother get the girl I wanted, but I can't change the fact that Sookie's straight. We can't all be perfect."

Hadley snorted with a laugh, "Yeah, well, to be fair, your brother is super hot."

Pam shook her head, "That's what I keep hearing, but don't tell him that. He already knows."

"Sookie really likes him," Hadley told her. "Before you guys got here, she was running around like a scared rabbit getting everything just-so."

"I know she does. I'm her best friend. I can tell too," Pam smiled. "She's a lot less stuck in her head when he's around. She smiles more naturally and is a lot sassier."

The two young women were quiet for a couple of minutes as they absorbed everything they had shared with one another. Eventually, Pam looked at Hadley and asked, "Is Sookie still really sensitive about her parents' deaths?"

Hadley nodded, "Yeah. Jason didn't help matters any by blaming her for the accident, but we were all kids at the time. Jason just needed someone to blame, I guess."

"And Sookie just believed he was right?" Pam demanded.

"No," Hadley shook her head, "I don't think that was it. As far as I know, she doesn't remember what happened the day of the crash. A lot of people asked her, but the only thing my cousin wrote was that her dad was yelling a lot. I don't know if she thinks he was yelling at her, or maybe he was. Either way, I don't think it had anything to do with Sookie."

"Why do you say that?" Pam asked.

"Because Great Uncle Bartlett hasn't been seen since that day either," Hadley whispered.

Pam raised her eyebrows like Hadley was unexpectedly telling a ghost story. "What does that mean?"

Hadley rose from the ground and began brushing grass from her skirt, "See if Sookie remembers at all. She's your friend right?"

"Hadley!" Pam jumped to her feet as well. "Are you saying that your great uncle hurt Sookie?"

"I'm saying," Hadley's face darkened, "that if you told me he did, and that Uncle Corbett did something about it; I wouldn't be surprised."

{†}

Pam felt nauseated all through dinner. Her meal, though delicious, was barely even registering on her taste buds. She couldn't manage to look at Sookie throughout the entire meal, and she was worried her friend would soon notice her avoidance.

 _How the hell am I supposed to ask anything about that?!_ She wondered angrily as spite for Hadley festered in her stomach. _Does Hadley expect me to go up to Sookie and ask if she was raped by her great uncle and witnessed her father murdering her rapist!?_

"Pam, are you feeling alright, Dear?" Adele asked. "You look so pale!"

"I don't think I'm used to eating so much," Pam uttered as she put her utensils back on her plate and rubbed her stomach.

"Oh, my," Adele fretted, "I'll get you a peppermint to suck on. Godric, maybe you should take your sister home. She looks terrible!"

"Don't worry about me," Pam tried to ease the old woman's concerns. "I feel bad that I can't clear my plate."

"Don't you worry about that," Adele returned with plastic wrapped peppermint candy. "Suck on that and maybe go lay down on the couch for a little bit."

Grateful to be excused from the dining table, Pam curled up on the sofa and pulled a homemade afghan over her body.

 _Is it worth knowing?_ She wondered. _If Sookie doesn't remember, is it worth hurting her to find out? Is she better off never remembering?_

The thought of some sick, old man chasing after Sookie made the turning in Pam's stomach intensify. At that moment, she hated Hadley for putting that image in her head. _Did Sookie call her dad screaming for help?_ Pam felt tears build in her eyes. Whenever she'd been in trouble, she'd always run to her brothers. She couldn't remember a time her father came to help her when she asked. It was always Eric and Godric that dropped what they were doing to go to her concerts. Her big brothers were still the ones who stepped in when she got picked on, or a guy gave her attention that she didn't want.

A gentle hand pressed against Pam's shoulder and she looked up to see Sookie crouching in front of her.

 _"You okay?"_ she asked with just the movement of her lips and the simplest tilt of her head.

"Yeah," Pam mumbled.

Sookie fell to her knees and then rested herself against the side of the couch. Pam watched as Sookie took her hand and began stroking it soothingly. Her friend was always so gentle and calm. She couldn't allow Hadley's theories and ghost stories to haunt her.

 _Then again, maybe Hadley had a run-in with this Bartlett guy, and that's why she's worried about it?_ Pam wondered. _Maybe there's someone else I can ask about that day…_

Pam shivered at the idea of asking Adele about it. _Hey, Mrs. Stackhouse, do you know anything about a guy named Bartlett trying to molest your granddaughters?_ That opening would surely go over like a lead balloon whether Adele knew anything or not. Still, Adele was her best hope to figuring anything out.

The only consolation Pam could take was that she didn't need to act immediately. She had time to build up the courage to get nosey. Maybe in time, she'd forget the whole mess and let the Stackhouses bury painful memories for good.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Eight: How Does It Make You Feel?**

 _So, today's the day you're going to be a pain in the ass, is it?_ Eric glared at his erection with annoyance and discomfort. He was going to have to jerk off again pretty soon and wasn't looking forward to it. Unfortunately, with celibacy came persistent boners, and with nothing but his hand to relieve the tension, masturbation was the only option.

 _Unless Sookie's ready to play_ , he thought mischievously and felt his cock strain that much harder as he climbed out of bed. A cold shower would have to do for today. It was Christmas Eve, and they had invited the Stackhouses for dinner with them. This meant he'd be running errands for Pam and Godric all day while they kept him a safe distance away from the kitchen.

 _Ha, ha, Eric can't cook_ , he smiled to himself until the first blast of cold water hit his chest. In truth, he wasn't quite the culinary failure his brother and sister presumed. When they weren't home, the middle sibling cooked himself eggs or made himself some pasta. He wasn't nearly as incompetent as they thought, he just purposefully got in their way so they wouldn't want him anywhere near the kitchen.

Allowing a cold shower to remedy the situation between his legs, Eric made quick work of washing himself so he wouldn't need to endure the frigid water too long. Even after the submersion, the threat of another boner remained eminent as Eric padded down to the kitchen. Luckily, the real cure to his problem was his sister's sour expression as she thrust a shopping list into his face.

"This is everything we're still missing. Go get it," Pam ordered as the post-it was stuck to his forehead.

The list only consisted of fresh thyme, heavy whipping cream, and vanilla ice cream. Eric stared at it suspiciously a moment before giving Pam a speculative stare.

"You're sure this is everything?" Eric asked, not trusting such a short list.

"Yes," Pam snapped.

"You're positive," he pressed.

"Yes!"

"I'm only going out once, Pam. If this isn't everything, that's your problem," Eric warned as he headed for the door.

Pam scowled, "It's everything. I checked three times!"

"Alright," Eric smirked as he made the final stretch from the kitchen to the foyer. Suddenly, he thought that Sookie might want to join him, so he stopped and headed for the phone. Although seeing his girlfriend would undoubtedly ignite the battle he was fighting with his male extremity, he couldn't bring himself to miss out on some private time with her.

" _Hello?"_ Adele's voice came over the phone.

"Hi, Mrs. Stackhouse. It's Eric. Can you ask Sookie if she'd like to come with me to the store?" he asked.

" _Certainly."_ He heard the phone clank against the table and waited, listening to Adele's distant voice. _"She'd love to, Eric. She's already dressed and ready to go when you get here."_

"Great! Thanks!" Eric hung up the phone and ran out to his car. It was nice having a girlfriend who didn't need to do anything special just to leave the house. Sookie woke up, got dressed and was ready for the day. _Although she looked amazing at Homecoming_ , he remembered. He'd never seen her look so beautiful.

Sliding into his car, Eric made the quick trip down the road where Sookie was already running out the door before he could come to a complete stop. She opened her door and slipped in before he could put the vehicle in park.

" _Hi!"_ she mouthed as she leaned in and gave him a kiss.

"Hi, to you too," Eric smiled at her. "You seem even more excited to see me than usual." Sookie took his hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. "Do you or Gran need anything from the store?" She shook her head 'no' and squeezed his hand again. "I guess I just lucked out and got some great company for the trip. I'm glad everywhere around here is closed on Christmas Eve. It means I get to drive with you all the way to Shreveport." He felt the weight of Sookie's head rest against his shoulder, and her hand slid to cover his over the gear shift. "Want to put in a tape?" he pointed to his dashboard. "Try the one with the label, _For Sookie_."

Sookie's hand left his so suddenly that he couldn't help but laugh. She quickly shuffled through his tapes until the one with the freshly written label, _For Sookie_ , came into view. Putting the tape in the player, she pushed play and patiently waited for the first song.

" _Anger he smiles towering in shiny metallic purple armor-"_

Looking at Eric curiously, Sookie focused on the words.

" _Queen Jealousy, envy waits behind him._

 _Her Fiery green gown sneers at the grassy ground-"_

She didn't know the song at all, and it wasn't like anything she'd ever heard before… But the lyrics were painting a picture in her head. Enveloped in a spiraling rainbow, Sookie closed her eyes and let herself be carried through to the chorus.

" _But they're all bold as love-"_

 _Yes, they are_ , Sookie couldn't help but agree breathlessly. Even if the way she expressed herself wasn't easy for others to understand, it had always been easy for Eric. She was more emboldened these past four months, but there was still a cowardly side of her that was too scared to accept that anything else could come of it. There was always that inkling of doubt that someone like Eric Northman could actually love her.

" _And all these emotions of mine keep holding me from_

 _Giving my life to a rainbow like you."_

Sookie felt her heart lurch. Was this song meant to be him singing to her? Or did he hear it and think she was singing it to him? Could it be both ways? _Are we both scared?_

In no time, Sookie had pondered her way through the remainder of the song, and by the end decided that she could take strength from the message. He was trying to tell her something, and no matter if she sought answers deeply or superficially, the answer was the same: 'Be Bold as Love.' Even if neither of them could say it yet with their hands or mouths, they could show it. Through their hugs, kisses, and tears, they could express what it was they felt until they were finally confident enough to both accept and give their love freely.

Leaning her head once more against Eric's shoulder, Sookie listened as the next song started. This one she recognized. It was _Everywhere_ by Fleetwood Mac. She smiled as she hugged Eric's arm tightly. The next was a Steve Miller Band song called _True Fine Love_ , and Sookie felt herself wanting to be closer and closer. After that, it was another song that she didn't know, but the singer's voice was familiar.

The experience was a rollercoaster of emotion as Sookie recognized some songs, and found herself straining to absorb every new one presented to her. By the time they ended up at Walmart, Sookie almost wanted to beg her boyfriend to let them stay and listen a while longer.

"We've got the whole car ride back to listen to more," Eric laughed as he turned off the ignition and then slipped out of the car to jog around to her side. Sookie pouted as he opened her door, but climbed out without protest. "How do you like my music choices?" Sookie gave him two thumbs up. "I'm glad. I tried to pick some music I knew you'd already know, but still, introduce you to some other songs." She nodded in agreement.

" _Love the first song!"_ she told him with enthusiasm in her gestures. _"Who sings it?"_

"The song is _Bold as Love_ , and it's by Jimi Hendrix," Eric answered as he placed his hand on her lower back since he wanted her hands free to talk.

" _Very beautiful,"_ she told him.

"It's one of my favorites. Jimi Hendrix' music has always made me wish I'd learn to play the guitar," he admitted. "Maybe when I go away to college next year I'll finally try to learn. I bet there will be plenty of people who know how to play, and I might be able to convince someone to teach me."

Sookie smiled as he laughed at the idea, and decided he had given her the best idea for a high school graduation gift. The question was, could she find a way to save up for it? Finding a job when you had no voice was not a simple matter, especially in a small town like Bon Temps. For the hundredth time in the past two months, Sookie fantasized about leaving her little hamlet behind and seeing just what the world could offer her.

The pint-sized shopping list hardly seemed worth the twenty-minute drive into Shreveport, and it took longer to check out than to get their groceries. However, they spent their time in line talking about the music on Eric's mixtape.

"I knew you'd like that song," Eric smiled as Sookie's hands moved with a growing fluidity.

The woman behind them in line could only stare, confused by the half of the conversation she was hearing. Eventually, the curiosity got the better of her, and she just had to ask…

"How does she enjoy music if she's deaf?" The plain curiosity eased some of Eric's annoyance.

"She's not deaf," Eric explained. "She just can't speak."

The woman paused a moment thoughtfully before she smiled, "I think that's sweet that you learned sign language so you could speak with your sister."

"I'm not her brother. I'm her boyfriend," Eric laughed as he pulled Sookie into his side. "I just can't hold her hand while she's talking."

" _He taught me to sign,"_ Sookie mouthed and pantomimed.

The woman gave an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry, didn't catch that."

"I taught her to sign," Eric told her. "I knew ASL before we met."

"Oh, what got you interested in that?" the woman asked as they all shuffled a few inches through the epically long line.

Eric flushed a little bit, "I'm a military brat. There was a boy whose father served with mine. He was deaf. I learned to sign so I could talk to him since his father often ended up at the same bases as mine." Sookie wondered why that story made him blush but decided it was better to ask privately if it was something that could bring color to his cheeks.

Finally, it was their turn to check out, and once their purchase was made, they wished the curious woman a Merry Christmas and headed back to the car.

" _Why did your deaf friend make you blush?"_ Sookie asked curiously as they arrive at the car.

Eric opened her door for her and neglected to respond until he was back in his own seat. When the tape player kicked on, he ejected it and sat in silence another moment.

"Logan," Eric began slowly, "that was my friend's name. He had an older sister named Freyda. She was gorgeous, and I sort of was very nice to Logan because I wanted Freyda to notice me."

" _Why are you embarrassed about that?"_ It seemed reasonable to her that boys would try and get close to their friends' attractive sisters. Jason did stuff like that all the time!

"Freyda was the first girl I had sex with," Eric mumbled. "My father got a promotion, and it ended up meaning I never saw Logan again… Or Freyda for that matter. When I heard about the promotion, I told them, and the next thing I knew, Freyda was coming on to me; just like I'd always hoped she would. We got transferred back to the States, but I still write Logan from time to time."

" _Not Freeda?"_

"Freyda," Eric showed her the spelling, and Sookie huffed. "And no, not Freyda. Like I told you before; Freyda and I were just familiar with each other. I was never in love with her. I just thought she was pretty, and I was attracted to her."

" _I feel a little insufficient,"_ Sookie signed solemnly.

"Because we don't have sex?" Eric asked worriedly.

Sookie shook her head, _"I don't know what makes me feel that way."_

There was a silent, motionless moment that seemed to go on forever. When Eric couldn't find any words to console her, and she couldn't find any way to elaborate on her feelings, Eric started the engine and pulled out of the parking space. The car ride was quiet as neither wanted to ruin the mixtape Eric had created by playing it in such a melancholy atmosphere.

When they were arriving in Bon Temps, Eric finally broke the silence and asked, "Would you like to hang out here until dinner? Since you'll be coming back anyway?" There was a hint of hope, maybe even desperation in his voice. It encouraged her to nod in agreement. "Thank you." She looked at him worriedly when he said that, and an urge to take his hand pulled at her arm until her fingertips touched him.

As he parked the car, Sookie's hands flung up, _"I'm not mad!"_

"I know," Eric assured, "but your feelings are hurt. I want to talk about it." Sookie nodded as they headed into the house, and waited by the stairs as Eric dropped the groceries off in the kitchen. She didn't hear him mention to Pam that she was here or that she was staying for the afternoon.

" _Come upstairs with me,"_ Eric signed at her, and Sookie realized that he wanted them to have privacy. When they were safely behind his bedroom door, Eric turned to Sookie and waited for her to give him any kind of hint to what she was thinking. "I wish you'd help me understand why you were feeling inadequate."

" _You show me so much patience,"_ Sookie stared down at the floor even as her hands moved. _"I don't know if I'm moving too slow for you, or-"_ Sookie looked up in surprise as Eric grabbed her wrists and pulled her against his body.

"You are not moving too slow," Eric assured her. "Whatever pace you need, I want. If you are happy, then I'm happy. I'll be much happier if you have sex with me when you want it rather than when you think I want it."

" _That's the part I don't get!"_ Sookie complained as she searched for a pen and paper. They had long since maxed out her vocabulary, and she knew part of the problem with their communication was that Eric was filling in the blanks. Admittedly, he was doing a fine job, but she didn't want to risk any misunderstandings. She found an old conversation on his desk and a pencil. Quickly she scrawled, _"How can getting something inevitable later rather than sooner make you happy?"_

"Inevitable?" Eric looked at her in surprise. Her face was red, but there was no mistaking what she had stated plainly. "You think sleeping with me is inevitable?" Her expression clearly said 'duh.' "Wow," Eric sat on his bed as he continued to stare at his girlfriend.

" _Why are you so shocked? You've practically planned out our lives for the next year and a half!"_ Sookie pointed out.

Eric laughed a bit uncomfortably, "I figured you'd get weirded out by the fact I planned so far ahead."

" _I did,"_ she assured him. _"In fact, it freaked me out a little bit, but you're a planner. Every once and a while you let your impulses get the better of you, but for the most part, you're very meticulous."_

"True," Eric agreed.

" _I realized one of the reasons you always asked me so many questions is because you're such a big planner. The more you knew about me, the more you'd be able to anticipate my reactions and plan ahead,"_ Sookie told him. _"I must be boring to plan for. I'm so predictable."_

"I like that, though," Eric argued. "I like knowing what makes you smile and why. I like knowing that even though you get giddy when I open doors for you, you're still uncomfortable when I buy you dinner and stuff. I liked picking out your Christmas present with all that in mind."

Sookie felt her heart tighten pleasantly as he explained all of his feelings. She appreciated that he was such an excellent communicator. He didn't assume her meanings. He asked for clarifications. He listened even though she couldn't speak.

Setting down the pen and paper on the desk, Sookie came to where Eric sat on the corner of his bed. With more anticipation than hesitation, Sookie slid onto Eric's lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. Eric's hands naturally reached to hold her hips as her mouth descended upon his own.

As their tongues tangled, Eric felt the all too familiar sensation of blood rushing to his southern region. If it weren't so annoying, he would have laughed. Instead, he cautiously pressed Sookie down against his erection, wondering how she'd react. She usually ignored his hard-ons, chalking it up to the fact that Eric was, in fact, a man, and these things happened.

A pleasurable jolt ran between Sookie's legs as she felt Eric's hardness pressing up beneath her. She felt her insides clench at the tentative caress of their intimate areas rubbing together, even through clothing it felt like her sanity would leave her.

Pushing down on her own, Sookie rocked her hips curiously against Eric's until a strained, "Fu-uck," escaped past his teeth. Then his mouth was covering hers again. His hands were squeezing her ass frantically and running up and down her back in alternating movements.

"Mm," her whimper was like wine on his lips.

"Your little noises are so sexy, Sookie," Eric panted against her mouth as he felt his cock hardening painfully. Her movements hurried all the more at his words, and he squeezed his eyes shut in concentration. "I can't take much more of this, Sookie," her boyfriend gasped. He wanted to rip open their clothing and push up inside of her. That's all it would take to undo him. She was so warm and perfect. One touch of her skin against his member was all it would take to break away the final thread of his control.

If it had been painful, Sookie might have thought she was straddling an iron bar, but the feel of Eric between her legs was everything except uncomfortable. It was bliss.

"Eh!" She gasped as another thrum vibrated through her sex.

"Damn it!" Eric snarled as he pushed her hips against his own and felt his cock throb against the inner seam of his jeans. Sookie froze as his hands slid from her hips and he hugged her tightly around the middle. She could feel him pulsing against her, and she held his head to her chest as he gasped for air.

It was a moment later that Eric realized Sookie was still stroking his hair, and he could feel his boxers starting to stick to him.

"I need to clean up," Eric told his girlfriend as he slowly pushed her onto his bed. Sookie nodded in understanding and laid on her side with her back to the bathroom door as Eric went to wash and change his clothes.

When he returned, Sookie was still laying on her side, so he spooned behind her and hugged her back against his chest.

"Sorry about that," he murmured against her ear. She took his hand and kissed his palm in reply. "I thought I had a handle on it, but when it sounded like you tried to say my name… It undid me," he laughed a bit self-consciously.

Sookie turned in his arms and smiled. Her hands came between them, and she reassured him, _"That makes me happy."_

Pulling her against his chest, Eric asked gently, "Do you want me to make you happier?" He watched as Sookie's lip was clamped between her teeth. There was a flash of excitement as he saw her indecision. Finally, she shook her head 'no.' "Because you're shy or because you're not ready yet?"

" _Both,"_ she replied.

"Alright," Eric kissed her lips softly as he took her hand in his and ran it up and down his chest. "Sorry," he laughed when he realized what he was doing, "I guess I wasn't done letting you touch me."

Sookie leaned in and kissed him more deeply as she let her hands explore him on their own. She felt the sharp ridges of his muscles when he tensed from a tickle, but mostly his body was just smooth and firm. Fantasies about memorizing his musculature with her tongue began to funnel into her brain, and her body responded immediately.

"You feel so good," Eric whispered against her mouth. His fingers dug into her sides as he resisted the urgent desire to touch her as well. _Calm down, calm down!_ He reminded himself as he took a steadying breath. _You boasted about all that control you had. Now's your chance to show it since your dick isn't backed up with thirty-two days of cum anymore!_

Mercifully, Sookie wasn't grinding against him, and Eric managed to cling to that luck as his opportunity. He unearthed his fingertips from her sides and instead tangled them into Sookie's hair. _I wonder if she's an ear or throat girl?_ he thought as he used the hand in her hair to tilt her head ever so slightly. When the connections of their lips broke, Eric kissed along the side of her jaw until he could suck her earlobe into his mouth. The results tried to claw at his self-control.

Sookie's body tightened beneath him, her breasts pushed up against his chest, and her arms wrapped around his neck and head. She seemed intent to keep him there, sucking on her ear and tugging little strings of electricity across her sex. Tiny sounds of arousal mingled with her gasps for air and Eric began to worry that he was becoming so addicted to those sounds that, if she ever learned to speak again, she'd be able to make him cum with words alone.

Tracing his tongue along the shell of her ear, Eric gave her cartilage a small tug with his teeth, and Sookie's legs wrapped around his hips. Alternating between sucking and nibbling, Eric felt his groin begin to stir. _Calm down, calm down,_ he told himself again.

His mouth began to trail down, curious to see if there was any pleasure for her to find at her throat. When his tongue licked a trail from her collarbone to her chin, he was excited to hear a low 'ah' come from her mouth. Encouraged, he nibbled and sucked there until her body began to wiggle beneath him.

"Feeling good?" he teased as he planted a swift kiss on her lips. Sookie nodded dazedly beneath him. "I'm glad, but unless we're planning on making another mess, we should probably stop." As he sat back on his knees, he saw that her nipples were hardened beneath her shirt. Then again, his cock was once more trying to bust his zipper, so it seemed fair. _I wonder if she's wet at all?_ The urge to find out was tempting, but the repercussions stopped him. Even if she allowed him to finger her, he didn't want their first physical interaction to be hurried. He wanted to explore with her and take their time. The last thing he wished was for her to feel rushed. _But I want to know!_ Eric's pride howled in frustration. If nothing else, he had to see if she felt any real excitement. After all, little noises were encouraging, but Sookie wasn't always so easy to understand.

"Sookie," Eric murmured as he glanced at her hard nipples, "I have to know." She looked at him curiously. "What we just did, are you turned on?" Her face reddened as she slowly nodded. "Did it make you wet?" Her forehead creased with slight anxiety at the question, and she brought a pillow over her head to hide her embarrassment. "You know what I mean by that, right?" he asked worriedly, tugging at the edge of the pillow. When he found her eyes, she narrowed them at him. "Talk to me?"

Sookie pulled the pillow from her face and demanded, _"Why do you need to know that?"_

"Sookie, I just came in my pants not ten minutes ago. Can you humor me?" Eric sighed.

" _Ego?"_ she guessed.

"Partly," he smiled. "Mostly, though, I want to be sure I'm making you feel good, and not just surprising sounds out of you."

Sookie looked at him, her cheeks still rosy from the previous activities and the current discussion. Finally, she gave a quick, sharp nod.

It was more than enough for Eric, and he let it go at that. "I'm glad," was all he said in response to her nod.

His girlfriend stared for a moment as if waiting for the situation to become humiliating again, but instead, Eric fell onto his side and pulled Sookie against his body. "Can we just lay here until people start to wonder where we are?" he asked softly. Sookie's reply was to snuggle closer to his chest and hug him tightly. Before either of them knew it, they were asleep.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE, REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **-Andi**


	9. Chapter 9

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Nine: Happy Birthday!**

"WHAT!?" Pam shrieked as she looked at her best friend's report card. "How the _fuck_ do you already have nineteen credits!?"

" _Summer school,"_ Sookie wrote in the notebook Jason had given her for Christmas. It was actually a nice, sturdy binder with different stationery. When she spoke with Pam, she used the pink papers. When she spoke with Eric, it was always blue since they both liked that color the best. Everyone else got the green papers. _"I had no friends to hang out with in the summer, so I took extra classes."_

Pam stared at her friend's report card a moment longer before asking, "So, you were actually a Junior this year?"

" _No, I started the semester missing a credit to be considered a Junior. Now I'm considered a Junior, and with my current classes, I will qualify as an exiting Senior next school year,"_ Sookie explained. She patted Pam's hand apologetically. _"If I'd known I'd have someone to spend a Senior year with, I wouldn't have rushed through school."_

Pam sulked some more but tried to be sympathetic. Even though people had been a lot less hostile toward Sookie in the months they had hung out, Pam had to admit she was worried the truce would end when Eric and Jason graduated. It was sad to think about, but Sookie was rightfully scared of her classmates. If all she wanted was to graduate and be free of them, Pam couldn't blame her.

"So, what are you going to do after graduation next year?" Pam asked.

" _I don't know,"_ Sookie confessed. _"I'm thinking about moving to Shreveport, though. I figure someone like me might do better in a city where there might be more opportunities."_

"You're just going to let a bunch of stupid rednecks run you out of your home?" Pam asked in annoyance.

" _The farm is my home. Bon Temps is just the town my home is in. I'll still visit my family all the time. I'll visit you, too,"_ Sookie assured with a smile.

"Are you thinking of moving down to New Orleans with Eric while he goes to college?" Pam asked the question that had been bothering her since Eric received his early admission letter to the University of New Orleans.

Sookie bowed her head and began playing with the beads of the bracelet Eric had made her for Christmas, _"Maybe."_

"What sort of answer is that?" Pam demanded.

" _Pam, things are going great with Eric and me, but it's only been three months that we've been dating. He's got his freshmen year of college next year. I still have one more year of high school. We'll see how we manage that year, and then I'll think about it more seriously,"_ Sookie's face was stern as she wrote all this out.

"Is Eric some sort of puzzle to you or something?" Pam demanded. "Romance is supposed to be about being swept up in the moment and believing in each other when no one else does! It sounds like you don't believe in him at all!"

Sookie sat frozen for a moment before she realized that Pam was angry with her. She wasn't angry about Eric, or even that Sookie planned to move away. She was mad that Sookie would be graduating early, and Pam would have no one to spend her Senior year with. Pam had sacrificed any chance at a social life to be Sookie's friend, and now Sookie was abandoning her.

Sookie wrote a quick message as she gathered her things to head to Eric's room. It was a simple, _"I'm sorry,"_ but she hoped Pam believed it was true. Her friend didn't try to stop her as she left the room, but glared at her until she disappeared around the doorframe.

"You're here early!" Eric commented as Sookie arrived at his room. He quickly shut the door behind her and hugged her close. "Is everything alright?"

Sookie shook her head and wrote nearly three paragraphs about what had happened in Pam's room. She expressed her sadness at leaving Pam behind and regret at hurting her, but she couldn't stay in Bon Temps.

"You fought about me too?" Eric read the words carefully. Sookie nodded. "Because you're not sure if you would want to live in New Orleans with me?" She nodded. "That does feel a little scary to think about right now, but if you decided you wanted to; at this moment, the idea makes me happy." His confession brought a smile to her own lips.

Taking the blue page back, Sookie added, _"I like the fantasy of it."_

"Wait," Eric realized suddenly, "you only have one year of high school left after this?" Sookie nodded slowly at his realization. "So we would only have to make it through one school year apart!" She nodded again. "Well, that's gotta be the best birthday present I could ask for! A year doesn't feel like anything at all!"

" _When is your birthday?"_ She felt terrible for not knowing it. She knew Pam's was April 9th, and she felt awful for not knowing her own boyfriend's birthday! _Then again, Pam always goes on about how lucky she is that her birthstone is a diamond,_ Sookie remembered with amusement.

"January 17th," Eric told her.

 _Oh my God! His birthday is in two days, and I had no idea!_ Sookie fretted. She wasn't prepared for this at all! _Why have I never asked him when his birthday was?!_ Now that she thought about it, she was almost positive he knew when hers was. She distinctly remembered him asking that very question when he first attempted reading her lips.

Sookie felt miserable as she realized she didn't even have time to make him something for his birthday like she had for Christmas. The girl glanced at the 14X14 canvas with her acrylic painting of the lake they had first gone fishing at. It hung over the headboard of his bed, and she had to admit that it blended nicely in his room.

" _I'm sorry I didn't ask about it sooner!"_ Sookie apologized. _"I haven't gotten you anything!"_

Eric gave his girlfriend a quick, soft kiss, "Don't worry about it. Spend the day with just me, and it'll be the best present." Grabbing her around the waist, Eric pulled her to lay beside him on the bed. "As for Pam, it can't be helped. You can't take a bunch of bullshit classes your fourth year just because you don't want to leave her behind. Pam's a big girl. She'll get through Senior year just fine without you." For some reason, that thought made Sookie even sadder. "She'll miss the hell out of you, but she'll survive."

Sookie held Eric a bit tighter. It was scary to finally have made a friend, and then have to consider leaving them. _But why isn't it as frightening with Eric?_ she wondered. _Why don't I feel as helpless and scared that he'll be leaving me to go to college next year?_

The terrifying truth was that she was scared. She had just been conditioned that high school sweethearts were a thing of the past and that modern men and women didn't settle down so quickly. Her relaxed attitude about Eric leaving was just a byproduct of being raised in a world that now looked down on younger couples. If she actually considered things any deeper, she would realize that in seven short months, her heart was going to split straight down the middle.

Ice crystals seemed to form in Sookie's stomach, and she pressed herself tighter against Eric. All this talking about the future was frightening. The questions and demanded answers were overwhelming. For the last eight years, no one had really cared what she did so long as it didn't get in their way. Now people wanted her to make decisions about the rest of her life… _Not people, just Pam,_ Sookie realized.

Her gran and brother had been content to let her be for now. They remained quietly encouraging as she explored her new friendship and relationship. Gran had even said Sookie should take a year off before deciding whether or not to go to college. Eric, a lot more confident in the success of their relationship, maintained a more positive attitude about the situation, but never made Sookie feel like she was being forced once direction or another. _Or,_ Sookie tentatively thought, _you have a lot more faith in your relationship than you're letting yourself believe! Don't you think it's possible that you don't feel pressured because you both want the same exact thing?_

The overall answer to that self-analysis was: _Yes_. Yes, Sookie felt the same way. Yes, she did want to go live with him in New Orleans after she graduated. And yes, she believed a year apart would suck, but she could and would do it for him. For a brief moment, there was a strange spark inside of her that told her that this was what being in love felt like. It was only a small realization, one that came and went as swiftly through her mind like the tail of a falling star in the sky. Emblazoned in her mind, but already gone before it could be grasped. Thankfully, that feeling was all Sookie needed to be sure they had seen or felt or even tasted the true meaning of love.

She wouldn't admit it, though. Not yet. If she never spoke again. If she never made a single sound the rest of her life. Even if what she managed to spit out sounded like the garbage disposal had ground up her words and sent them tumbling from her lips. She would tell him.

{†}

 _Come on, Sookie,_ she thought angrily _, any sound. Just one little noise on purpose!_ She encouraged her reflection. Her mouth opened, and her pink tongue wiggled, but her throat closed against her efforts. _Stupid brain!_ She put her hairbrush down, placed her hands on her dresser and stared long and hard at her reflection. _One little sound, Mouth, that's all I want. Let me make one noise that I want to._

Despite the frustration, Sookie sighed. _Even if it was an 'ah' sound instead of an 'I,' that'd be good enough for me,_ she sulked.

She remembered the babbling sounds she could make when she cried hard enough. She remembered the cries of pain she'd let loose when Compton pushed her face into the ground, or when those upperclassmen shut her head in the locker. There was also that time she'd managed to say 'beau' when Pam played the viola, and the times she'd managed the 'eh' for Eric's first name. Those last few times, a word had been on her mind. She'd wanted to say Pam's music was beautiful. She'd wanted to speak her boyfriend's name with a tone of passion.

 _It's too late,_ Sookie thought sadly as she finished getting ready for school and began the walk up to Rosenfont Hall. It was Eric's birthday, and she still couldn't manage to utter the first word of her desperate declaration.

Grabbing her backpack, Sookie slung it over her shoulder and began walking up the road to Eric's house. Her brother had offered her a ride, but she insisted that she really did like the little walk in the morning.

" _Good morning,"_ Sookie waved as she entered the house. Eric greeted her at the door with a deep, knee-knocking kiss. He was very enthusiastic this morning! _"Happy birthday!"_ she wished him.

"Thanks," he placed his hands on her hips as he asked, "after tea, will you go to Shreveport with me?"

" _It's your birthday,"_ She assured him with a smile. _"What do you want to do?"_

"Grab some dinner," Eric played with the bracelet that he'd made for her for Christmas. It was just a strap of leather with shiny beads on it, but when Sookie insisted they not buy anything for each other, it was the best he could do. Eric had made an identical one for himself and told her that way everyone would know they belonged to one another. Sookie had blushed as he made that declaration in front of her family but had secretly been pleased by the thought. She wore hers on her left hand, and he wore his bracelet on his right, that way when they held hands, the bands were next to each other.

Sookie gently tugged her bracelet from his hand so she could reply, _"Can we listen to the mixtape you made for me?"_

"Sure," Eric smiled as he leaned in for another kiss. Before their lips could touch, Pam came clacking down the stairs.

"Happy birthday!" Pam crowed as she produced a nicely wrapped gift.

"Thanks, Pam," Eric accepted it. "Do you want me to open it now?"

"Go for it!" She knew her brother couldn't stand being kept in suspense. He had a horrible habit of nagging the crap out of her whenever she tried to surprise him.

Eric quickly tore open the paper like a small child, and Sookie smiled at his enthusiasm. "Whoa, you actually saved your allowance for this!" He took out a CD case that declared he had received an accounting software program for his birthday.

"Anything for my favorite brother," Pam grinned.

"I heard that!" Godric called from the kitchen as he came in with another gift. Eric opened it to find a new printing calculator and gave his brother a quick hug. "I noticed you'd opened up your old one and figured there was probably something wrong with it."

"Yeah," Eric sighed, "I've tried cleaning the gears, but I think the feet are going on the printer's feeder. It keeps seizing up and printing over itself. I was going to see about replacing the feet, but this is even better! This one looks new, too. It'll last much longer than the one from the resale shop!"

 _A resale shop?_ Sookie wondered. She was all too aware that the Northmans were well off, but that they also were on a strict budget for quite some time. Jason seemed to know more about it than she did, but she reasoned that the topic must have come up during his hunting trip with Eric a few months ago. Sookie supposed that if she'd ask, Pam or Eric would happily explain, but the young woman felt it would be rude to question.

As Eric fawned over his gifts, Sookie clutched her backpack self-consciously. Deep down she'd known she wouldn't be able to make herself speak in two days, not even unintelligible utterances. Therefore, Sookie had taken time the night before to make Eric's favorite cookies. She didn't know what they were called, but her family had always called them jam cookies. They were just vanilla cookies with a dollop of any sort of preserves in the middle, and she knew they were Eric's favorite because he always devoured them whenever they appeared at tea time. She was pretty certain no one even got a chance to try one.

When Godric and Pam looked at Sookie expectantly, she slowly opened her bag and took out a prettily wrapped cellophane bag with a blue ribbon cinching the top.

"SHORTBREAD COOKIES!" Eric howled happily as he accepted the bag. "What flavor are they? Can I have one now? I just brushed my teeth, though. The toothpaste will ruin the flavor. Damn it!"

" _Strawberry rhubarb,"_ Sookie signed. _"Gran made the jam, I did the rest."_

Eric ran his tongue around his teeth, "My mouth doesn't taste too minty, I bet it will be fine." He carefully untied the ribbon and reached in for his first cookie. He could feel his mouth beginning to water as the jam shined up from the golden cookie. His teeth sunk into the sturdy but soft texture, the jam clung gloriously to his teeth and then-

"Eric, are you crying?" Pam demanded.

"This is," Eric looked at the treat with captivation, "exactly what a home baked cookie should taste like."

Sookie let out a breath she'd been holding. She'd never baked for anyone but Gran. Up until recently, Jason had refused to eat anything she'd made, and she hadn't been sure if she could trust Gran to be honest about her abilities in the kitchen. _Then again, she had no issues telling me off for messing something up when I was first learning,_ she remembered Gran's scoldings fondly.

"I don't know if I'll be able to eat store-bought cookies ever again," Eric laughed as he savored the rest of the treat. "I don't trust myself to take these with me to school…" he murmured. "But if I leave them here, Godric will eat some. Fuck it, at least if they all get eaten during school, they'll all be eaten by me." With that, Eric took Sookie's hand and began leading her out the door. "Thank you for my birthday present. Those are my favorite cookies ever! I've never had strawberry-rhubarb jam before, though. It's pretty amazing too."

The entire car ride to school, Eric continued talking about the cookies his girlfriend had made him and how he couldn't believe she picked his favorite kind to make! Sookie grinned as she became more and more pleased with the turn of events. She had thought he would give her a thankful kiss on the head, and that would be the end of it. _Maybe I'm not as lame of a girlfriend as I thought_ , she considered as they walked into the school, and Eric had yet to let go of her.

"Thanks for the cookies. They'll probably all be gone by lunchtime," Eric confessed as they arrived at the girls' homeroom. Pam stomped straight into class, and Eric sighed at her attitude. "We just can't seem to win with her lately. She's either upset that we're getting along too well or upset that we aren't getting along well enough."

Sookie nodded sadly, but still stood up onto her tiptoes to give him a kiss goodbye before he headed to his own class. He waved and left for his homeroom, and Sookie finally went to her seat beside Pam.

" _What's up?"_ Sookie pushed the pink paper toward Pam.

"Nothing," Pam snapped as she went about organizing her due assignments for the day.

" _You always seem to be mad at me lately,"_ Sookie wrote. _"What am I doing wrong?"_

"Nothing," Pam replied stiffly.

Sookie slowly put the paper back into her binder. Pam didn't want to speak to her about what was bothering her, and pestering seemed to be counter-intuitive. The most she could do was hope the problem would either pass or that Pam would open up about it.

It had been a long time since Sookie felt so neglected at school, and she had to wait until after third period before Eric made his first appearance of the school day. As much as Sookie wanted to tell him how terrible her morning had been, she couldn't bring herself to put a cloud over his birthday. Instead, she beamed happily at him and tried to discretely ignore Pam's sulking at lunch.

" _Maybe you should drop me at home after school and have afternoon tea with your brother and sister today,"_ Sookie suggested. _"We can go out after that."_

"Are you sure?" Eric asked sadly.

" _I think I should give Pam some space. I don't know if she's still mad at me about the other day, or if I've done something else now too,"_ Sookie paused a moment. _"Whatever the reason is, I think she needs some distance from me."_

Eric nodded in understanding, but also couldn't help but feel frustrated with himself and his sister. The growing rift between Sookie and Pam felt evident to him. Pam was still attracted to Sookie, sure, but the real problem was that Sookie was spending more and more time with him. On more than one occasion, Eric was certain he and Sookie had put Pam in the middle of each other, and it was apparent his younger sister was reaching her limit. _Hopefully, some of the tension will ease when I go to college next year_. Of course, that just meant the stress would be between himself and Sookie rather than Sookie and Pam, but he could handle it. He was also optimistic that Sookie could handle it too.

When the day had ended, Eric dropped Sookie off at her home, much to Pam's surprise. "Sookie's not spending the day with you?" Pam asked.

"I wanted to at least have afternoon tea alone with you and Godric. I'm going out to dinner with Sookie afterward," Eric explained. He was actually grateful for Sookie's suggestion. For a while now, he felt like he hadn't connected with his family very well.

Pam only managed a distracted nod as they turned around and headed back up the road to their house. When they came inside, Godric had already started the kettle and Eric resigned himself to peppermint tea. He was pleasantly surprised to find it was actually his favorite chai when the aroma came to him.

"It's your birthday," Godric shrugged. "I figured just this once I wouldn't make you fight for it." Eric rolled his eyes but offered his thanks. "Where's Sookie?"

Eric shrugged, "I wanted to have a little family time for a change. Sookie and I spend so much time together, I don't want you guys to feel neglected."

Godric snorted with a laugh, "Then everything is going well between you two?"

"Absolutely!" Eric grinned but fumbled when he saw Pam's face tighten out of the corner of his eyes. "Pam, is everything alright?" he asked.

"It's fine," Pam took a sip of her tea and grimaced. "I don't know how you can prefer this crap."

"You know, you're a horrible liar, Pam," Godric sighed.

"No," Pam set down her teacup, "I'm a terrific liar, you two just piss me off so well that I can't pull it off as easily."

"Then just say it, okay?" Eric commanded. "You're giving everyone attitude, Sookie thinks you hate her, and I'm starting to think you don't like me much either at this point."

"Sookie's going to graduate a year early," Pam spat out, "and I'm going to be all by myself next year! She's not even planning on staying in Bon Temps! I won't even be able to hang out with her outside of school!"

Eric relaxed slightly when his sister finally unloaded what was bothering her. "And you're mad at me for the same reason?"

"I'm even angrier at you!" Pam told him icily. "It's always been the three of us! You guys are all I've ever had. My whole life you've been there, and now… It's all ending, and I realized that I'm not ready for it to end."

"That's not so bad, Pam," Godric assured his sister. "A lot of people get anxious about things changing, but you have to remember that just because we get older doesn't mean that our bond to one another breaks. It will have to change, but that doesn't mean it has to go away."

"Sookie was the first friend I made who didn't become my friend to get at my brother, and she ended up with my brother!" Pam groaned. "What if no one likes me without you guys?"

"You're right, Sookie didn't become your friend because of me," Eric pointed out. "Sookie is _your_ friend because she likes _you_. She always goes on and on about how you stick up for her, and how she knows you have to try extra hard not to push her too much. She likes that you push her, though. I just don't think she wants you to push her away."

"Why not? She's leaving me anyway," Pam grumbled.

"For now, Pam," Eric sighed. "Were you planning on going to the same college as her? What if Sookie chooses not to go to college? Were you just going to go to school in Shreveport? You know their design program isn't very good, right? What happened to going to design school in L.A or New York? This is the time of your life when the distance gets between you and your friends. Only time can tell if your bond is strong enough to overcome the distance. Sookie and I will have to do that next year," he reminded.

"I guess…" Pam grumbled as she played with her biscuit. "I guess I need to try harder."

Godric smiled, "And stop being so hard on yourself. Letting go of a crush is no easy matter either. I think you need to give yourself credit for being so mature about the situation."

Pam huffed, "What was I supposed to do? Throw a tantrum that my crush liked someone else? Ruin her chances of being with the person she liked because it was my brother?"

Eric shrugged, "I've seen you pitch a fit for less." Pam raised her middle finger at her middle brother, and he grinned at her. "There's my Pam."

"Well," Pam finished the last of her tea, "if you don't mind, I think I'll sneak over to Sookie's house and get her ready for your date tonight. I'm sure she'd like to look especially nice for your birthday."

Eric was about to protest, but he knew that Pam wanted to see her friend for more than just an impromptu makeover. He hoped that it would also include an apology.

Pam was quick to pack up another one of her Southern Belle dresses that she just couldn't make herself wear, and her makeup case. She stole Eric's car and drove down the road. When Sookie came bouncing out to greet who she assumed was Eric, she skidded to a halt.

"Sorry to disappoint you," Pam popped out of the car, "but you are not going to be seen out on the street with my brother looking like that. Even if it is just in Shreveport."

Stunned into immobility, Sookie allowed herself to be shoved back into the house.

"Did you forget something, Dear?" Adele called as she heard the front door open again.

"It's just me, Gran," Pam called. She and her brothers had come to call Mrs. Stackhouse Gran just like any of her actual grandchildren would. "I decided Sookie was going to be killer hot for my brother's birthday dinner, so I came to give her a makeover."

"Oh, that's sweet of you. I hope your brother didn't make reservations anywhere. I remember how long it took you to get here for Christmas breakfast," Gran teased sweetly as she passed the girls to get another cup of coffee from the kitchen. She patted Pam's cheek gently as she strolled by.

"God I love that woman," Pam sighed as she dragged her friend back to her room and began pulling her clothes off.

When Sookie saw what Pam planned to put her in, she shook her head, _"Too cold!"_

"That's what leggings are for, Sweetheart," Pam laughed as she pulled out a pair and tossed them to Sookie.

In no time at all, Sookie was dazzling even herself in the mirror and Pam was packing her belongings back up. As Pam did, she finally accomplished what she truly meant to when she chose to come to the house.

"I was mad," Pam announced suddenly. "I was mad you were leaving me behind, and that you weren't sure if you were going to go to New Orleans with my brother. Eric reminded me that we would have split ways after high school anyway, and in his own way said I shouldn't waste the time we have together."

Sookie stared at her friend a moment before she left the mirror to give her a firm hug. _"I'm sorry,"_ she gestured when she pulled back.

"Don't be. I was the one who was living too far in the future," Pam confessed. "Either way, things will happen the way that they'll happen. For now, I just want to get something else off my chest." Sookie urged her to go ahead, and Pam took a deep breath. "I'm a lesbian." She waited anxiously to see Sookie's reaction. When her friend gave a confused thumbs up as if she weren't sure why this was a problem, Pam continued, "I had a huge crush on you when we first met, and I guess a bit of that was still lingering. I think that's why I got as angry as I did. I'm sorry I let myself act like that."

Sookie nodded slowly as she absorbed this. Eventually, she picked up her binder and took out a fresh pink paper. _"Well, I'm definitely flattered someone as pretty as you had a crush on me. It makes me feel like I might not be as far out of Eric's league as I thought! As for the rest of it, you're my friend, and I love you. If you bring home any girls from college, I'll be sure to give you my real opinion of them just like you and Godric gave your impressions of Eric."_

Pam groaned at that last part, "You bitch." Sookie grinned at her best friend and gave her another hug. "I love you too, you know. And I love you the right way for us now."

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE, REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **-Andi**


	10. Chapter 10

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Super early tonight, and probably will be for the next month. My work hours are all over the place, and I'd rather not make you all wait or rush myself at 3AM trying to get the post up before work! I'm sure none of you mind getting a new chapter a few hours earlier than usual! Please enjoy!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Ten: Spring Break**

 _Come on, Sookie,_ she encouraged herself, _just say 'ah!'_ As had become her morning routine for the past three months, Sookie stared at herself in the mirror, urging her throat to cooperate. Her vocal chords still refused to do her bidding, but Sookie had noticed that more and more involuntary sounds would happen since her exercises began. Pam had even managed to make her laugh on several occasions!

Where Pam could make her laugh, Sookie had also discovered Eric was quite adept at making her moan. Though their physical relationship was still kept relatively chaste, the occasional surge of hormones regularly amounted to the necessity for Eric to change his clothes after more than a few encounters. Even though Eric felt as though his pride was struck, the self-induced celibacy was worth it to him in proving a point he wanted to make.

Sookie wasn't quite sure what his point was anymore. He had more than proven to her that they were together for more than just physical reasons. His continued look toward the future gave her more and more hope that they had one together. The way that he never viewed her inability to speak as a hurdle only made her lo-

Sookie stopped that thought right there. She couldn't focus on thinking about that. Not until she could say it. Just once. _God, if it's the only sentence I ever say… Please let me have that one sentence, and you can take away every syllable you have promised to me from here until the day I die!_

One more time, Sookie squared off to her mirror and concentrated. She felt the pressure build in her throat, the burst of air just waiting to rattle the cobwebs on her vocal chords and produce a sound. _I. I. I. I. I…_ Her mouth opened and… Nothing. Still nothing.

Disheartened yet again, Sookie turned once more from the mirror and grabbed her suitcase. Jason was probably already waiting downstairs for her, and she didn't want to delay their departure.

The Northmans had invited them on a trip to Six Flags in Texas. It was a long drive, but they managed to rent a pair of rooms so they wouldn't need to try driving home after a full day of roller coasters. Gran had even loaned them her Station Wagon since no one else's car could seat five people.

Since it was their Spring Break, they chose to go on a weekday rather than the weekend and hoped that every other student hadn't come up with the same idea.

"Ready?" Jason asked as he took his sister's duffle bag from her and carried it out to the car. It had already been decided that Godric and Jason would be the alternating drivers. Pam had gotten stuck sitting behind the driver's seat, Eric would sit in the center of the backseat since it had the most leg room, and Sookie would sit on the other side of him.

Jason threw the bags in the back of the wagon, and Sookie climbed into the backseat so she wouldn't have to shuffle two minutes later. "You don't gotta pee or anything, right?" Sookie gave her brother a sour look that plainly stated, 'Do I look five to you?' Her brother laughed and got behind the wheel.

"One bag, Pam," Sookie could already hear Eric telling his sister in an exasperated voice as they pulled into the driveway. "One bag or we're going without you." His sister let out a suffering sigh before she shuffled a few things around between three large duffles and finally had a reasonable combination of all three inside a single one. "She's going to be the death of us all on this trip, trust me," Eric warned as he threw his own bag in the back and then Pam's.

"Hey, asshole! Do you know how much my make-up costs!? Don't throw that shit around like that!" Pam harped at her brother, but he was already crawling into the backseat.

Eric immediately pushed the armrest of the front seat down and snaked his legs across it until they were at full length.

"You best be planning to keep your shoes on," Jason grumbled.

"I will, I will," Eric sighed. "Am I going to be nagged at this entire trip?" he asked of Sookie.

" _Not by me,"_ she assured.

"Well, if you weren't freakishly tall, none of this would be a problem would it?" Jason pointed out.

"Jealous?" Eric taunted.

"Of you?" Jason craned his head to look at his sister's boyfriend. "You're dating my sister. I ain't jealous of a thing."

"And here I thought you were a real redneck," Eric shook his head in disappointment.

Jason snorted with a laugh, "Y'know, not all our family trees look like Christmas wreaths. You wanna see that shit you gotta go to Hotshot."

"What's Hotshot?" Pam asked as she settled into her own seat.

"It's a little shit town, even smaller than Bon Temps. It's full of brother and sister cousins," Jason told her as Godric threw his own bag in the car and climbed into the passenger's seat. "You ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," Godric replied as he fastened his seatbelt. "Everyone buckled?"

"Yes, Mom," Eric called.

"And off we go!" Godric declared as Jason pulled out of the driveway.

"It's too bad we couldn't invite Bill. I feel bad he's got nowhere to go for Spring Break," Jason muttered as he pulled onto the road, glancing back toward his house and the Compton place.

"If he wasn't so abusive toward your sister, maybe he could have started with a better reputation with us," Pam pointed out.

"Yeah, but he hasn't bothered her in months," Jason interjected.

"Probably because I smashed his face into a locker," Eric reminded.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that," Jason frowned. "Sorry, Sook. I forgot about that whole deal back at the beginning of school."

Sookie's hands began to flow quickly through the air, and Eric answered, "'That's okay. It let me meet my best friend.'"

Pam leaned forward to smile at Sookie and give her a wink. Ever since she had come out to her best friend, things had definitely improved between all of them. Pam didn't feel as angry or depressed about her brother and best friend being together, and she also found more time to devote to watching out for Hadley. With Sookie spending so much time with Eric, Pam had ended up reaching out to the Stackhouses' cousin. Since Hadley's one year of sobriety was fast approaching, Pam thought she could use a little acknowledgment for the feat. She tried not to smother the girl, as Hadley expressed that too much praise made her feel stressed out about failing.

Two and a half hours into the six-hour drive, the first of the passengers to lose steam on the trip was Sookie. She'd held out valiantly for an extra half hour before she prodded at her boyfriend and admitted that she needed to pee. When everyone filed into the bathrooms, she felt better knowing everyone was in need of some relief.

"Alright," Godric announced, "ten minutes to stretch your legs while we top off the tank. Jason, do you want to switch drivers? We're almost to the halfway marker."

"I dunno," Jason mumbled, "I want it to be even."

"You can drive an extra half hour on the way back," Godric placated. "It seems silly to stop in another half an hour just to switch drivers."

"Alright, alright," Jason sighed. "Thanks."

"No problem," Godric assured as Jason moved around the car to put in some fuel.

"Say, can I ask you something?" Jason asked as he turned on the pump.

"Go for it," Godric crossed his arms over his chest as he waited for the question.

"Eric mentioned the whole stipend thing when we went hunting together last November, but how is it you can afford to take all of us on this trip? Is your allowance that big?" Jason asked.

Godric laughed, "It's substantial, but Eric is actually the one paying for all of it."

"I'm confused," Jason confessed.

Godric paused, "As you know, we don't get our true inheritance until all three of us have a bachelor's degree in some field. That was part of our mother's will. We were given a small amount to fix up the house and pay bills with some incidentals money, but it is very tightly managed by Eric. He's quite astute about how that stipend is used."

"So, the bulk of your allowance is just enough to put food on the table and pay the bills?" Jason finally understood.

"Yes, anything else we use has to be earned the good old fashioned way until all three of us are done with college. Thankfully, our mom took that into account, and we have separate accounts for our college tuition," Godric explained. "There's a lawyer back in New York who deals with special or extenuating circumstances, but otherwise, it's just our stipend and nothing else."

"Thanks for explaining it. I know it's none of my business, but with the way things between Eric and Sookie are going… I'm just curious if he's loose with his money," Jason explained nervously. He knew he was prying, but he had to know if Eric was responsible with his money.

"Well, Eric's generous to Pam and I from time to time. He was the only one of us that took any sort of job while we moved around, and then he went and asked our mother if she'd help him invest it into the stock market," Godric recalled. "He's always been interesting when it came to money. Although, he really wanted a Corvette, but I talked him out of it."

"Wow, I wish I was that good with money to afford a Corvette," the younger man confessed. "So, after you guys get your inheritance, what'll happen to your house?" Jason asked.

"Well, we could sell it and split the profit three ways, or one of us could decide to live there and pay off the other two," Godric considered. "I know Pam has little interest in staying. She's a diva and will probably move to New York or Los Angeles once she finishes school."

"What about you?" Jason asked.

"Once Pam finishes high school, I'm planning on transferring to a university with a better psychology department," Godric explained. "Eric will be in New Orleans… So, I suppose it will come down to if either of us wants to keep Rosenfont Hall."

"I know it's none of my business, but I'd love to see that place stay in your family," Jason admitted as the pump clicked that the tank was full. The two men walked into the station to pay for the gas together.

"Why's that?" Godric asked.

"Pump 3," Jason handed over a ten dollar bill. "Because Rosenfont's got a lot of nice things about her. She's the only plantation around here still owned by the original family, you know?"

"I didn't know that," Godric admitted. "I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens."

"I guess so," Jason agreed as he accepted his change and they all headed back to the car. He let out a shrill whistle that made a few other patrons look up in surprise, "Alright! Everyone back in the car! Let's move!"

Everyone returned to the car, looking less than enthusiastic about another three and a half hours driving in such close quarters. Godric had anticipated this, and to make it easier, they would be arriving at their hotel around check-in time, they'd have all afternoon and evening to nap or play in the pool. Tuesday would be their day at the park, and then they would leave for home on Wednesday morning.

"How much longer is this fucking car ride?" Pam groaned as they sat in traffic.

"At this rate, we'll have another forty-five minutes to go," Jason announced. "Looks like there was an accident. Once we get past it, things should open up again." He glanced back at his sister and saw that her eyes were wide and that she was trying to strain and see what had happened

The Northmans all groaned, but when they passed the sight of the accident, they were relieved to see it was nothing more than a truck that had lost its load. There didn't appear to be any injuries, just a giant mess.

"As annoying as the congestion was," Jason muttered, "at least no one was hurt." He looked back at Sookie again and saw that she was still on edge over the accident. "It's okay, Sook."

Eric flinched when he heard Jason say that and looked at his girlfriend worriedly. He had been so busy trying to see what had happened that he had forgotten that Sookie might have been upset by the situation. Without further hesitation, he took Sookie's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"Nothing but a couple busted boxes," he told her merrily. Sookie gave him a strained smile.

Like Jason had anticipated, a couple miles after the accident, the traffic broke from its tight formation, and they were moving swiftly once more down the highway. With a rejuvenated mood, everyone began chattering excitedly as they grew closer and closer to Arlington. Ten minutes sooner than predicted, they pulled into the hotel parking lot, and everyone dragged their bags to the front desk.

"Reservation for Northman," Godric announced pushing his credit card at the clerk.

"Ah," the clerk paused a moment before taking the credit card. It was an awkward, glaring silence as they waited to receive their room keys. "Rooms 402 and 404."

"Thank you," Godric replied politely as he handed Eric and Jason the keys to 402 and then gave the girls keys to 404. "And the elevators are?"

"Just down there and to your left," the clerk replied shortly.

"Thank you," Godric said again as they all filed toward the elevators.

"Was it just me or did that guy not like you one bit?" Jason asked as he pushed the UP button.

"I'm sure they are all wary of minors during Spring Break," Godric announced. "We picked this hotel specifically because it's out of the price range of most students. I doubt they were happy to see I had a group of high schoolers with me."

"Don't worry, it's not like we'll break anything," Jason grumbled as the elevator arrived and they all squeezed in with their baggage.

"Just try to reign in your wolf howls," Eric suggested.

"Whatever," Jason snorted as he leaned his head back and waited for them to stop on the fourth floor.

All five of them were grateful to arrive at their rooms, and the shared door between them was left open as they unpacked and flopped onto their beds. Sookie was out like a light as soon as her head hit the pillow. She couldn't remember having such a long day, and all they had done so far was drive!

"Are you awake?" she heard in her dreams.

"Mmm," she answered.

"Do you want to stay in bed?"

"Mmm," she smiled.

"Can I join you?"

Sookie's eyes snapped open, and she found Eric staring at her with a look of both amusement and surprise.

"You know," he whispered, "you can sort of talk in your sleep."

" _What do you mean?"_ She asked with her hands.

"I was asking you questions. You say 'Mmm' for 'yes' and 'uhh' for 'no,'" Eric explained.

" _Really?"_ Sookie asked excitedly.

Eric nodded, "So, can I get in bed with you?"

" _Will you be good?"_ Sookie asked.

"I'll be very good if you want me to," He winked playfully, and Sookie rolled her eyes while simultaneously opening the blankets for him. "Everyone went down to the pool, but I wanted to stay with you."

" _Suck up,"_ she mouthed.

"Don't mention sucking when we're in bed. You'll make me turn bad on you," Eric teased. Sookie let out an amused huff. "You don't think I would?" Sookie shook her head. "Do you want me to prove you wrong?" he asked, and the tenor of his voice changed so suddenly that Sookie stared in surprise. "I don't know if I can make it as long as I said I wanted to unless you tell me to hold back, Sookie."

" _What does that mean?"_ Sookie asked.

"It means," Eric leaned in closer to her, "I really want to touch you. It doesn't mean sex. I'd rather wait at least until May for that. I'd rather you were seventeen and legal. But for now, I just want to put my hands on you."

Sookie was a master now of speaking without words, and Eric's declaration did not impede that ability in the least. Without hesitation, Sookie took Eric by the hand and brought it to settle over her breast. He stared for a moment before giving the fleshy globe an experimental squeeze. Sookie smirked as he acted as though he'd never felt a boob before.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do this," Eric told her as he reached with his other hand to take her right breast into his clutches as well. "Sookie, I will just tell you that you have the best tits in the world." She gave him a bemused look as he played with her. Honestly, she was pretty sure boobs were created more for men than for women or even babies. She didn't understand the captivation they brought to men.

Reaching up, Sookie caught Eric's attention and mouthed, _"Kiss me?"_

Eric quickly complied and swooped down to capture her lips with his own. His tongue tangled with Sookie's in familiar sweeping patterns until his fingers caught a hardening nipple and gave it a small tug. Sookie gasped at the sensation and felt her hips buck in response.

"See, this can be just as good for you as it is for me," Eric teased as his mouth moved against hers.

 _I'm not so sure about that_ , Sookie thought dazedly as his hands worked hard at earning every little gasp and involuntary whimper. Soon she was shivering beneath him, and Eric had to pull away. Cum soaked underwear was not the way to start their Spring Break.

"Okay, okay, time to calm it back down," Eric took a steadying breath. _Forty-five days_ , he thought regretfully. It was still forty-five days until Sookie's seventeenth birthday, and he cursed every single one of them.

{†}

"WOOOOO!" Eric shouted as they twisted and turned every which way. His stomach continuously plummeted and then rose into his throat as the rollercoaster flung them through the air. When the most recent ride came to an end, he practically had to lift Sookie from the seat. "Are you okay?" Her teeth were clenched, and her hair was sticking up unnaturally high even for a post rollercoaster ride.

" _Can we take a break?"_ Sookie asked as she walked wobbly legged through the ride exit.

"Yeah, of course," Eric assured her. "Do you want to get something to eat-oh… No, probably not. Umm…" He'd just dragged her onto a half dozen different rides in a row and was only just noticing that she was pale as a ghost. _I'm such a dick_ , he thought. "Oh! Popsicle?" he offered out of desperation. Sookie shook her head.

In a last-ditch effort, Eric brought his girlfriend to a nearby bench, sat down and pushed her head down onto his lap. She tried to protest at first, but her head was facing away from his lap, so she settled and just let him smooth out her wind-tangled hair. _That feels nice_ , Sookie sighed as his strong fingers rubbed against her scalp and gently tugged at her hair. Soon they were working the base of her neck, and she felt much better. The rides weren't so bad, but so many in a row had just been too much for her. She needed a break, and yes, probably food.

"Let me know when you're feeling better, and then we'll get something to eat," Eric promised as if he knew her stomach was just about to growl. "After that, we'll just do the light stuff like the Ferris wheel."

Sookie nodded against his thigh, her eyes still shut as she felt the Spring sun trying to warm her.

"You've never been on roller coasters before, have you?" Eric guessed. When Sookie shook her head negatively, he apologized again. "I didn't mean to push you so hard. Godric, Pam and I have gotten to go up in several different planes with our father a few times. Rollercoasters are nothing to us… Have you ever flown?" She shook her head again. "It's a lot of fun, but I prefer piloting. I'm only licensed for single-engine planes, though. That was the last thing my father and I did together was getting my private pilot's license. Godric's licensed too, but Pam was too young."

Sookie turned onto her back to look up at Eric. He looked down at her sensitive eyes and shook his head. "Trust me, it was not quality bonding time. He was a complete ass the whole time. The only reason I could hold it together was that I was used to him being an ass."

" _Do you hate him?"_ Sookie asked.

Eric sighed, "No. I don't like him, but I don't hate him either. I think I'm…" Sookie waited a long moment before he finally managed to confess, "I think I'm scared of him."

" _Why?"_

"Becoming him," Eric answered. "He and I were a lot alike. All structure and strategy. Both of us got a thing for Southern girls we fall head over heels for," he smiled down at her. "I even look a lot like him… So what if I get married and have kids and they can't stand me as much as I can't stand him?"

Sookie wondered if that wasn't the other reason Eric jumped from woman to woman in the previous years.

"Do you want kids?" Eric asked suddenly, and Sookie's face went bright red. He was staring at her so seriously, that she felt compelled to nod. She did want kids. She just never thought she'd meet someone who wanted to have them with her. Even though it went against the feminism everyone preached nowadays, Sookie dreamed that she could be a housewife and stay at home mom. Cooking, cleaning and raising babies; that had been her dream as a child. It had become an unattainable fantasy as she became older, however. "You'll be a great mom," he told her, making her blush more.

" _How do you know?"_ Sookie asked.

"Because you're so sweet and fiery," Eric told her. "You have all the spectrums in between, too. You can laugh at yourself, endure so much, and still smile when you're angry or upset. You forgive and-" Sookie placed her hand over his mouth. "What?" he mumbled against her fingertips.

No one had complimented her so much, not even Gran. All the things he said about her were both painful and healing. If she weren't so damaged, would he have looked twice at her? She knew that his feelings were well beyond pity now, but she wondered if a seed of sympathy was how it all began. _But does the beginning matter so much as long as we got here?_ She asked herself.

"Feeling better?" Eric asked as she took a while to respond after cutting him off. Sookie nodded as she began to sit up, but her arm hooked around his neck and kept him still as she kissed him deeply. When she pulled away, Eric cradled the back of her head and brought her back to his lips. "Let's get something to eat."

Together they stood up, and Eric spotted his brother standing near them.

"We're all going to Bubba's for lunch. Want to come?" Godric offered.

"How did you find everybody?" Eric asked in surprise.

Godric laughed at the question, "You and Sookie went off together, the rest of us stayed together. I just had to find you. Pam and I knew which rides you'd hit first, so the three of us split up to scour those rides, and we're meeting at Bubba's in thirty minutes."

Eric laughed as he followed his brother, "It was lucky we were taking a break near the ride we just went on."

"Yes, it was," Godric agreed. "Are you having fun, Sookie?"

She nodded, _"I was feeling sick after the last one."_

"The last ride got the better of her," Eric told his brother.

"Maybe you should cool it on the rides for a bit," Godric suggested.

"Don't worry, I already promised it was Ferris wheels and carousels after this," Eric laughed as they wove between the crowds.

Sookie perked up at the mention of a carousel. She'd always loved them when she was a kid because she never got to ride actual horses. Her mother wouldn't ever let her near a horse because she'd been kicked by one as a child and feared the same would happen to Sookie. Even though several people in Bon Temps owned horses, Sookie had never been able to work up the nerve to ask to ride one even after her mother could no longer protest.

When they arrived a the park's restaurant, they were grateful to find that Jason had already gotten a table for them in the quickly crowding establishment.

"Good, you found them!" Jason grinned at his sister and her boyfriend as they sat across from him.

Eric smashed himself into the corner of the booth and kept Sookie on the outside. They were still waiting on Pam, and he knew his sister would want to sit by Sookie. "We were on a bench at the time, so we weren't a moving target."

"I was told to check out the coasters near the diner," Jason told him. "So, when I didn't see you guys, I figured I'd get us a table."

"Have you been having a good time stuck with my siblings?" Eric asked.

"Man, you guys have iron stomachs!" Jason complained. "Even Pam was only getting sick of it because her hair's getting all messed up!"

Eric laughed at Jason's comment, "Speak of the Devil. Pam! Over here!" he waved at his sister who had just come through the door. Pam spotted them and made her way over.

"Which one of them found you?" Pam asked as she sidled up next to Sookie.

"Godric," Eric answered as he grabbed a menu. "Sookie, do you want a diet coke like usual?"

"Ah," Sookie's hand slapped over her mouth as her eyes widened. Everyone at the table looked at her in surprise.

"Sookie," Jason leaned forward excitedly, "did you just say 'yeah'?!"

The girl froze as she analyzed what just happened. She intended to reply with a 'yes,' but Eric's sudden change from talking to Pam and then asking her a question had taken her by surprise. She wasn't sure if the sound was voluntary or not.

After some deliberating, she shook her head as tears leaked from her eyes. It couldn't have been her first word. It was just an unintentional syllable that came out at the right time. For a brief moment, her hopes had soared but were quickly swept out from beneath her.

"It's alright." Eric pulled her into his arms. "The more accidental sounds you make, the closer you are to doing it on purpose, right?" Sookie nodded into his chest. "Have you asked Gran to schedule an appointment with a speech therapist yet?" She shook her head. "Maybe now is the time to do that." Her back shook harder with her mostly silent sobs, and Eric continued running his fingers down her spine. "I know," he whispered. "You really wanted to say 'yes,' didn't you?"

"Is everything okay over here?" Their waitress arrived to see one of her customers sobbing.

"Yeah, it's fine," Jason sighed as he slumped back in his seat with disappointment. He wasn't disappointed in his sister, he was disappointed for her. "Can I get a bacon cheeseburger with a Coke, the crying one will have the same but with a Diet Coke."

"Jason!" Godric admonished, but stopped when a small laugh mingled with Sookie's sobs. "Ah," _I guess she likes when you make light of situations_ , he realized. "I'll have the Southwest Chicken Sandwich and a Coke."

Everyone quickly put in their orders and changed the subject.

"I think I might want to go swimming again tonight," Pam announced as they lamely tried to come up with a new topic other than Sookie's speech.

" _I'll swim!"_ Sookie told her.

"Me too," Eric added. _Sookie in a bikini? Please let me see Sookie in a bikini!_

With their evening plans decided, everyone dug into their lunches and then headed to the Ferris wheel together. Jason chose to ride with a stranger, so Pam and Godric sat together, and Eric and Sookie went up with one another. By the time the wheel had gone around once, Jason's face was mussed with lipstick. By the second turn, he had the girl's number.

When they all exited the ride, Jason wasn't surprised to see Eric and Sookie as disheveled as himself and his own riding buddy.

"Are you guys gonna get any souvenirs?" Jason asked.

"I think we'll go on the Gunslinger," Eric replied thoughtfully. "We're leaving a four, right?"

Godric nodded, "If we want to leave early tomorrow morning, leaving by four will give us time to unwind back at the hotel."

"Hey, Eric," Jason called as they all went to go their separate ways again, "don't forget to take Sook on the carousel. It's her favorite!" he waved as he headed off with Pam and Godric.

Sookie stared off after her brother. She didn't think he'd remember that after so long.

"The carousel?" Eric smiled down at her.

" _I like horses,"_ she told him sheepishly.

"Have you ever gone horseback riding?" Eric asked.

Sookie shook her head, _"Mom was scared of horses."_

"We went once with our mom," Eric recalled. "Pam was too little to ride by herself."

" _Is it fun?"_ Sookie asked as they strolled toward the Gunslinger. They'd go to the carousel last.

"I guess," Eric thought back. "I remember being surprised how tall horses really are. When I was on its back, I was stunned," he remembered with a laugh. "I was only eight, and the trail was just a large walk around the perimeter of a farm. It was really flat, and even a kid like me could handle it." Eric glanced down at his girlfriend, "Would you want to do something like that?" he asked. Sookie grinned up and nodded. "We could do that for your birthday," he suggested. "That's only forty-four days away."

Sookie's brow furrowed, _"Why do you know how many days away my birthday is?"_

 _Shit!_ Eric fumbled a minute, "I'm just excited about it, I guess." Sookie stared at him suspiciously.

" _You're thinking dirty things,"_ she accused, but her expression was playful.

Eric paused a minute before deciding that giving Sookie a bit of a warning would probably increase the chances of her accepting what he wanted to offer.

Tugging her by the wrist, Eric pulled his girlfriend close. She folded into his embrace, feeling a blush rising in her cheeks. Unsure about the strange flair of bashfulness, Sookie looked up at Eric. They hugged all the time, but something about this moment felt too intimate to be shared in such a public setting.

"I'm counting down," Eric murmured in her ear, "because I really want to eat your pussy."

Sookie jerked away in surprise to stare up at her boyfriend. _I didn't just hear that!_ She could only gape at his bold declaration. It didn't help that her female organs gave a longing clench at his words. Despite the crudity, Sookie couldn't deny that a part of her liked the idea very, very much.

At Sookie's response, Eric couldn't help but laugh at her expression and ask, "What do you think, Sookie? You can ride a horse _and_ my face on your birthday." Her scandalized expression only fueled his amusement. She turned away to walk up to the Gunslinger line and turned her back to him. "Are you mad?" Eric asked as he stepped behind her and wrapped her back in his arms. He didn't sound the least bit apologetic even as he wondered if he'd upset her.

 _Mad?_ Sookie wondered. She knew she wasn't angry. _Terrified?_ That seemed more appropriate. It was one thing to let his hands paw at her breasts over her clothes, but what he wanted was to put his face against her very private areas! _What if I don't taste good?_ She wondered anxiously. _What if I can't cum?_ She worried further. _What if he's horrible at it!?_

As her concerns grew, her shoulders tensed more and more. However, she was unaware of that until Eric's hands were there, rubbing and squeezing her upper arms all the way to her neck and base of her skull.

"This is why I wanted to mention it now," Eric's lips were a smile against her ear. His hands slid from her arms to her waist, squeezing her against his torso. "I want you to enjoy it if you want it. You can talk to me about it- any of it. And if your birthday comes, and you decide you don't want me to do it for you, just say so."

Sookie placed her hands over Eric's where they came to rest on her belly. _I wish I had someone to talk to about this_ , she thought. Unlike when she admitted she couldn't slow dance, Pam definitely was not going to give her a crash course in this one!

"You have time to think about it, Sookie," Eric reminded as they took a simultaneous step forward as the line moved.

Turning in his arms, Sookie's hands moved so quickly Eric had to tell her to slow down. _"Do you like doing that?"_

"Is that your way of asking if I'm _good_ at it?" Eric laughed teasingly. His girlfriend looked around, worried that someone would overhear him and pick up on their conversation. Seeing her discomfort, he leaned in, "I'm okay at it, but I do like to do it. A lot of girls seem scared to have it done to them."

Sookie could understand that. Even when she touched herself, it took a while to get anywhere. What if Eric worked and worked until his tongue about fell off and she couldn't cum?

"See, they tend to get that look on their face," Eric pointed at her expression. "What is that face?"

Sookie blushed. _"What if I can't c-u-m,"_ she had to spell out the word, not knowing if there was an ASL signal for it.

Eric actually laughed, "That's what's going through your head?" He seemed almost relieved. "Sookie, if you're enjoying it, it doesn't matter. Don't worry about whether you do or you don't, just have fun. If you don't, I'll just keep practicing… and," his voice got even deeper as he whispered in her ear, "maybe you could give me a few pointers?"

His girlfriend pulled away and had to resist the urge to fan her flaming cheeks. _Did he just imply he wants to watch me masturbate?_ She had to admit that it seemed like an excellent way to show him what she liked. Although it always sounded like women were cumming like trains at a station in her romance novels, and that the men hardly had to even try. _But they don't cum in their pants in the books either_ , she thought amusedly as she looked at her boyfriend.

Eric's eyes narrowed. "That's the look you give me when you're making fun of me in your head," he accused. Sookie's expression turned innocent. "And that's the look you give me when you feel bad for what you were thinking."

" _How do you even know that!?"_ Sookie demanded.

"Because you used to make fun of me all the time before we started dating. Now you never share those amusing insights with the rest of us," Eric pointed out.

" _I'll tell you later,"_ she promised with every intention of doing so. _"I don't know all the words."_

Eric's shoulders relaxed, "Okay."

It was finally their turn on the Gunslinger, and Sookie had to admit that she enjoyed it more than any of the other rides. Swinging high above the park in a gentle, sweeping motion rather than being shot skyward like a bullet was far more enjoyable. When they landed, she almost wanted to get back in line to do it again.

Finally, it was time for the carousel, and Sookie practically skipped to the line. Eric enjoyed the way her hand tugged and slackened as she dragged him to her favorite ride. Sookie scanned the available mounts when it was their turn to ride, and picked out a pretty, white filly for herself. Eric chose the black and white horse sculpture next to her and nudged her leg with his foot. She looked at him with a broad, happy grin as the music grew louder and the platform began to turn.

The glow of her excitement made Eric lean his head against the lift pole and stare at her through the entire ride. He watched the way she flung her hand over her head like a rodeo rider, then become distracted by petting the fake mane. When the spin was over, Eric saw her give the mount a small hug and couldn't help but shake his head. He'd have to start looking for a place to take her riding.

"Ready to head for the car?" Eric asked as he checked his watch.

Sookie nodded as he took her hand, and their matching bracelets winked at one another. She didn't know what about those bracelets made her heart ache with happiness. It could be that he'd made the bracelets for each of them to wear. It could be that she knew he didn't like wearing jewelry but only did so for her. Most likely, she admitted, it was because it was a way for people to identify them as a couple even when they didn't stand side by side. The thought that they belonged to one another was evident. He wanted it to be visible, and that made her lo-

That made her want to say three words more than any other words ever again.

 _Please, God, if you only give me three words to say for the rest of my life…_

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE, REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **-Andi**


	11. Chapter 11

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Eleven: All the Things I'd Like to Say**

Sookie didn't care that everyone was glaring at her. She clapped and whistled as Eric was called to receive his diploma. When Gran chuckled and tugged at her shirt to make her sit down, Sookie only did so when her boyfriend cleared the stage.

In a small town like Bon Temps, graduation ceremonies were blissfully short, and there were only a handful of students that needed to receive their diplomas after her boyfriend. That short amount of time felt infinite as Sookie bounced impatiently in her seat. She barely even remembered to whistle and clap for her own brother!

When they were finally able to mingle on the gym floor with the graduates, Sookie launched herself into Eric's arms. _"I'm so proud of you!"_ she told him.

"Thanks, Sookie," Eric pulled her close for a short but sweet kiss.

"Good job, little brother," Godric grabbed Eric and gave him a quick, masculine hug.

"Says the shortest one of all of us," Pam pointed out as she snuck in a quick hug of her own. "So, how does it feel to finally be free of this bullshit?"

"Let's just say, I'm looking forward to a Summer of Sookie, and sort of dreading going to New Orleans this August," Eric confessed.

"Jesus," Jason grumbled as he weaved his way toward the group, "what am I, chopped liver?"

" _Sorry,"_ Sookie gestured before finally letting go of Eric and hugging her brother. _"I made your favorite cake for graduation,"_ she offered as consolation.

"Yeah, 'cause your man doesn't eat cake," Jason scowled.

"No, I'm more about pie," Eric grinned, and Sookie's face tightened anxiously at the reminder that her birthday was only nine more days away, and her boyfriend would happily gorge himself on her pie if she didn't make an objection.

Jason's eyes narrowed as he followed the implication, but he chose not to say anything in front of his grandmother.

"Shall we head back to Rosenfont?" Pam asked as they gathered toward the door. Everyone had managed to squeeze into Gran's station wagon by putting Sookie on Eric's lap. The couple had made no objection to the seating arrangements.

As everyone strolled back to the car and piled in, Eric couldn't help but let his hands wander as they bounced along the back country roads. Sookie's ass was rubbing him through their clothes, and he could see her nipples hardening through the cotton of her dress and bra. If she didn't let him get his face between her legs in the upcoming weeks, he wasn't sure he'd survive!

When they pulled up to the old plantation, Eric stopped Sookie from sliding off him, "Wait, just a moment, okay?" Sookie looked at him before a pleased grin spread across her lips. Her bottom shifted against his dick, and he sucked air between his teeth. "I wanted you to stay put to hide my erection, not make it worse!" he hissed.

Remaining quietly still, Sookie waited until she felt the rigidness against her bottom dissipate. She had to admit, she didn't think he had that much control over his body, but he seemed to do just fine bringing himself back down. Then again, she remembered grinding against him the previous night and causing another messy pair of boxers. Those occasions only happened every few weeks, and she was starting to find a timeline or rhythm in regards to his level of control. For the next week, he'd be able to keep a handle on his arousal, but once they hit day nine or ten, it would be more difficult for him to calm himself. After two weeks, he'd be at risk of losing all control.

"Thanks for cheering for me," he said while pulling her close once more. "It meant a lot to me."

" _We should get inside,"_ she told him as she began to climb off his lap. It was too warm in the car to stay there for very long.

"Have you thought much about your birthday?" he asked before she could open the door.

Sookie was grateful her back was to him because every time her birthday was mentioned all she could think about was Eric's desire to go down on her. That made conversations with Gran very confusing and awkward when she asked about the cake she wanted.

She shook her head.

"You still haven't asked me much about it. You asked a few things at the park when I first brought it up, but you never followed through on talking about it when we got to the hotel."

Slowly Sookie turned to him, _"Embarrassed."_

"Why?" he asked, intrigued. Sookie gave him a look that questioned why he was oblivious to the answer. "It's funny how you can be so bold one second and so timid the next," he laughed as he pulled her back against him. Despite the oppressing heat inside the car, he wanted just a couple more minutes alone with her.

Turning in his arms, Sookie took out her purse, opened it, pulled out a paper and handed it to Eric. It was on one of their blue notebook pages.

Unfolding the paper curiously, Eric was surprised to find an entire page of thoughts and worries presented to him in Sookie's beautiful handwriting.

"These are all the things you've been thinking about since I brought it up?" Eric asked in surprise.

" _I needed time to think,"_ she explained.

"'How do I reciprocate?'" Eric read off the paper, and Sookie flinched. "Sookie, it's not a bartering system. You do things as you want. 'What if I don't like it?'" He smiled. "I doubt that would be a huge problem, but maybe let me know how I could be better?" As he read on, he was smiling, and at one point he stopped reading and just leaned forward to kiss her. "The things you know from what our classmates talk about is terrifying. No, I won't put my fingers up your butt." Sookie covered her face with her hands in embarrassment. "Hmm, well, it looks like I'll need to study this a bit, but I'll answer all of these," he promised, folding the paper and putting it in his pocket. "Right now, though, it's getting too hot in here!"

Eric pushed his door open, and it was terrifying to find that the air was much cooler outside despite it being mid-May.

In reality, Eric had come across the question, 'Why don't you masturbate?' and just wasn't sure how to answer it. To be honest, 'getting off' hadn't been on his mind for quite some time. Every so often his body demanded it, and since becoming more adventurous with Sookie, many a pair of boxers had been soiled. But how could he explain to his girlfriend that at 18, he had already lost interest in immediate gratification? He wasn't sure if it was because he had started having sex so young, because of his mother's death, or maybe even because he had met Sookie. Whatever the reason was, if Sookie wasn't there, he didn't see much of a point.

Sookie crawled out of the car as well, joining Eric as he combed his hair back with his hand. Suddenly he understood why Sookie had taken her time writing this list. He would need to take his time answering it.

"Do you masturbate a lot?" Eric asked suddenly, and Sookie looked at him in surprise. She shook her hand in a so-so manner. "Daily?" she shook her head. "How many times a week?"

Sookie shrugged before holding up four fingers. This wasn't exactly accurate. It really depended on the week or the time of the month for that matter. She wouldn't even be thinking about touching herself for the current week.

"I just don't get too preoccupied with it, I guess," Eric told her. "Eventually my body tells me it needs it and that's when you make a mess of me," he teased. "But as for why? I really couldn't say."

Taking this into consideration, Sookie wondered what that could mean for their future sex life. Would he not want sex often? Would he want sex all the time? She was beginning to wish she had her page of questions back as more came to mind. The last inquiry on the page was making her nervous now. _What if I want more than just your mouth?_

When the couple came into the house, they were grateful to find everyone had already convened in the kitchen to set up lunch. With just the five of them, they decided to set the prep counters with the pre-made food and cake and just socialize in the kitchen. Gran was sitting on a barstool at the breakfast bar, and smiling fondly at her grandson as she snapped one last picture of him before he discarded his cap and gown.

"I'm so happy to see you graduate, Dear," Gran told him. "I'm even happier to hear you changed your mind about college!"

Jason snorted, "It's just a little community college in Shreveport, Gran. A couple night courses a semester."

"That's more than I ever expected you to agree to!" Gran laughed. "I'm so proud of you." She looked sideways at Sookie. "Maybe it will encourage your sister to reconsider college."

"I think she's looking to get her MRS, not a BA," Jason commented.

Sookie's head snapped to glare at her brother, and threw the only sign language he could understand.

"You put that middle finger down, young lady!" Gran barked. "Voice or no voice, that's no way for a lady to act! And, Jason, don't say such rude things in front of her boyfriend!"

"What?" Jason shrugged, "I thought I was helping!"

Pam distracted the situation by putting out the platter of food that had been in the fridge, "Let's just eat some lunch already!"

As everyone was distracted by food, Sookie slipped away to Pam's room. She had hidden Eric's graduation gift in there. It had taken a lucky stroll through a pawn shop and a bargain to do all the church event baking for the next year, but Sookie had managed to purchase Eric his first guitar. Pam had agreed to stow it for her the night before the graduation ceremony so she could give it to him right after.

Coming back down the stairs, Sookie wasn't quite surprised to see Eric on his way to find her.

"What do you have there?" Eric smiled as Sookie unsuccessfully hid the present behind her back.

" _Your present,"_ she mouthed as she pulled the guitar from behind her back.

Eric grinned as he quickly ascended the stairs to meet her halfway. She handed him the guitar and gave an apologetic shrug over how beat up it was.

"This will give me something to do my first year away," he smiled as he sat on the step and Sookie sidled up next to him. His fingers gave a light, experimental strum and the strings crooned in an out of tune chorus. "I'll try to get some basics learned before leaving. Otherwise, my roommate might kill me."

Sookie leaned her head against his shoulder as his fingers played softly against the strings of his new guitar. When he felt her hand in his pocket, Eric looked down at her in surprise, but relaxed when she pulled out her list of questions from earlier.

"You want to keep going through them?" Eric asked. Sookie shook her head and held up one finger. "You want me to answer one of them? Which one?" She pointed to the question. It was the one she finally felt she wanted the answer to. "You… want more?" he looked at her with a mixture of emotions.

Sookie turned and reached into her purse for her ever-present pen. Using her thigh, she wrote on the back of the paper.

" _I know why you wanted to wait, and if that's still how you feel, I respect that. But you should know, that even if college could manage to break us up, I'd rather things end with the knowledge that I got to know you completely. I want to spend the first summer of my first romance with you in every way I can for as long as I can."_

Eric read the paragraph three times before he finally looked at his girlfriend. "I want that too," he whispered. "But before any of that, there's something we've been skirting around. I think I know why, but I can't be with you if I don't say it."

 _Oh,_ Sookie bemoaned silently _, no, don't say it! Please, God, don't let him say it!_

"I love you, Sookie," Eric murmured as he took her hand. "Don't gesture or write or anything. Just kiss me, and that's all I need. I know you want to say it. I feel it. So, for now, just let me say it for the both of us, alright?"

 _Please, God, if there were ever a moment you should unstick my voice; this is it!_ Sookie pleaded as she opened her mouth. She knew her throat would close even before her lips moved. She knew that even the softest sound would clog at her vocal chords, but she still wished an angel would clear her throat for a fraction of a second she needed to tell him what she'd wanted to say. Instead, while her throat remained closed, her tear ducts opened. Instead of words, salty rivers came.

Eric could feel her cries even as her mouth reached for his. She kissed him as tears ran down her face. She sucked in his breath with a chest-rattling sob, and he held her close.

"It's alright. I know, Sookie. I know," he soothed as he buried his face into her neck. "I'm sorry, but I need you to hear me say it. I need you to know that I love you so much that not saying it every time I see you I feel like I'm lying to your face."

Sookie clung to Eric as she accepted his declaration. It wasn't that she didn't desire to hear it… She just wished desperately that she could say it back. She wanted to use her voice; not the voice she had hidden behind for nine years. Words were laying dormant in her chest, not her hands, and she wanted them to come out. The weight of those words was crushing her lungs.

"Please, don't cry," Eric begged as he held her tighter. "We knew. That should have been what mattered. I'm sorry, Sookie," he felt his chest grow heavy with the guilt of what he'd taken. The brief relief of finally telling her how he felt seemed superficial and mocking now.

Pulling away, Sookie wiped another stray tear away as she took the paper back from him and quickly wrote, _"Say it twice as much for me. Keep saying it twice as many times until I can say it back."_

Eric read her promise before he kissed the page and then her lips. When he went to kiss her, he couldn't help but let out a sobbing laugh, "You had to write something that romantic on the back of a paper covered in sex questions?"

Sookie let out a watery giggle as she pulled him in for another kiss.

"I love you, I love you," he mumbled against her lips.

{†}

"Happy birthday."

Sookie jerked away at the sudden voice in her ear but found herself restrained by a sturdy pair of arms.

"It's just me," Eric chuckled as he loomed over her in the darkness of her bedroom. There was scarcely half a moon to illuminate her room, and the late hour wasn't helping any. "It's midnight. Happy birthday! I wanted to be the first to tell you."

Sookie reached for her bedside lamp and then turned in Eric's arms. _"How did you get in here?"_ she asked.

A Cheshire cat smile split his mouth, "I came in through the bathroom window."

Sookie gaped at him. The bathroom window was eight feet off the ground and barely two square feet big!

" _How!?"_

"That is my own little secret," Eric told her mischievously. "You see, I know it's going to be difficult getting you to myself most of the day. I only have you booked for two hours, a half hour of which is driving out to this farm with horse trails, then an hour of riding, and then a half hour ride back. So, if I wanted any 'Sookie is legal' time, I had to get it in now."

" _Pig."_

"Undoubtedly," he agreed easily. "But I'm helplessly in love with you, so I can be a pig from time to time, right?"

Sookie sighed but nodded in agreement.

"Thankfully, my only real mission was to be the first person to wish you a happy birthday," he whispered. "Since that's out of the way, I can leave if you want me to. Or I can stick around, and we can cuddle," he offered.

" _We can cuddle,"_ she agreed. _"We'll see what happens from there."_

"All I wanted was a foot in the door," he assured as Sookie reached for her bedside lamp and shut it off. "Just… Pat my hand or something from time to time so I know you're still awake. I'd hate it if you weren't awake to feel me feeling you up."

 _Yeah, like I'll be able to fall asleep when your hands are running all over me like that,_ Sookie noted as his hands pressed and squeezed against her belly and sides. Before long she could feel him pressing against her backside, and she sighed. Eric getting hard was a staple in their making out. If his hands were on her for more than a moment, it was a guaranteed result.

 _Although it seems a lot hotter now,_ she thought as his breath was warm and wet against her neck. Though his hands remained against her abdomen, she felt herself gasp from time to time as he'd push against her lower stomach and she'd feel her womb clench in response. _Oh, my God._ She thought her body was being far too responsive to such small efforts. As the heel of his palm rocked rhythmically against her uterus, she felt his other hand rise to cup her breast. His fingers tugged at a nipple that had already hardened, and her thighs clenched reflexively. _What's happening?_ She clutched his forearm with a combination of helplessness and pleading.

As his hand removed its pressure from her womb, Sookie wanted to protest, but that hand slid down further against her thigh. She felt his hand slide inward between her legs and held her breath as his middle finger stroked her folds.

"You're already starting to get a little wet," he tugged her earlobe with his teeth, and Sookie shuddered excitedly. A surge of excitement pulsed to his nether regions as he discovered his girlfriend slept without panties. His finger slowly worked her arousal over her clit and began to rub there in a teasingly light manner. He felt her hand tighten on his forearm and paused. "Do you want me to stop?" he asked softly. "Push me away if you want me to stop," he encouraged. Rather than push, she placed her hand over his and pressed his fingers where she liked them. Experimental strokes of his fingers made Sookie let out the breath she'd been holding, and he felt her begin to move against his touch.

Sookie watched as Eric's form slipped from behind her and rolled her onto her back. Soon he was towering above her, one hand supporting his weight as the other stroked between her legs. His mouth kissed and encouraged her as his fingers probed and explored. When his middle finger slid inside, Sookie marveled at the depths he could venture that her own fingers could not.

"You only use those tiny fingers of yours in here, don't you?" he asked as his finger slowly slid in and out. Sookie's head nodded, and her lips parted when he struck untouched spaces inside. His wrist pivoted, touching all the surfaces of her inner walls and a soft moan escaped her lips. "There are those noises that I love to hear," Eric kissed her again. "Don't hold back. I want to hear you."

His girlfriend groaned as his finger left her channel to play with her clit once more. She opened her legs further as her hands came to cover her face. Even though it was difficult to see in the dark, their eyes were adjusted now, and there was no escaping his entranced gaze. He was watching her every movement.

Eric let her hide from him, knowing that in time she wouldn't. If covering her face helped her escape and just enjoy what he was doing, then the young man wouldn't object even if he wanted to see her expression as he gave her pleasure.

Since her mouth was covered with her hands, Eric began kissing down the length of her body. Her nightgown was mostly in the way, but it was starting to bunch above her navel, so he focused his energy on kissing and licking her belly until her legs had opened all the way and he could nestle his head between them.

Sookie seemed to notice the shift of his weight because she looked from between her fingers at him, watching in anticipation as his mouth lowered to her sex. She was captivated when his eyes closed, and he seemed to savor her taste. He licked enthusiastically at first, and just as soon as Sookie began to grow concerned about his methods, his tongue lathed over her clit in firm, repetitive strokes.

"AH!"

Eric opened his eyes to look up at Sookie as she instinctively muffled herself. Although the shout was definitely loud for Sookie, it was barely as loud as a sleepy grunt. Certainly not enough to disturb anyone from their sleep.

Her hips began to tilt away from his face, and her hands alternated between clutching the bed and reaching for his head. She never committed to either movement, and he enjoyed watching her body lose control. His hands kept busy while one slipped its fingers in and out of her pussy and the other kneaded and rubbed her thigh. Eric could feel her walls beginning to tighten down on his finger, and knew if he just kept doing what he was doing, he might actually pull this off!

 _Stay there, stay there, stay there,_ Sookie begged internally as she sucked in a breath and didn't release it. Eric's touches intensified as he heard her hold her breath, and was soon gifted with the pulsing clench of her inner muscles as he gave her the first orgasm of their relationship.

Her breath came back in rapid gasps, and Eric gently stroked her wet, swollen lips as she came back down. Their soft throbbing against his fingers brought a million fantasies as he looked up at her stunned face.

Eric watched as she finally caught her breath, and pulled away as she sat up. When she reached her arms around him and stole a deep, grateful kiss, he could only smile and bask in his success.

"You're adorable when you cum, Sookie," Eric told her as she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled herself tighter against his body. "You have absolutely no idea what to do with your hands!" he teased before kissing her again.

" _I taste okay?"_ she asked bashfully.

"Mmm hmm," he assured. "More than okay. Five Star dining." She snorted and rolled her eyes. "You don't believe me? Can you not feel how fucking hard I am right now? That's from dining at Café Sookie." As usual, his compliments walked that fine line of vulgar and endearing for her.

With a small shimmy of her hips, Sookie easily felt the erection of which he spoke. It was hard between her sensitive lower lips, and she felt as though she needed it to stay there.

" _Eric,"_ Sookie wondered how well he could see her signs in the dark, _"can I have more?"_

There was a pause before her boyfriend replied, "You liked it that much?" He seemed happy to know this. She nodded as she leaned in to kiss him. Her flavor was still on his lips but tasted much better than she remembered it tasting before. "I'd be happy to oblige," he agreed as he went to push her from his lap, but she held tight. "I can't go down on you in this position," he pointed out with a chuckle.

Sookie shook her head, _"Sex."_

Eric fumbled a moment as he understood her request, "I don't have condoms, Sookie. I didn't come here thinking you'd-"

" _I'm on the pill,"_ she told him.

"Wait, what?" he stared in disbelief. "Since when?"

" _January,"_ she answered.

"Why?" he asked.

She paused, confused by his question. Finally, she realized she didn't have enough words in her ASL vocabulary to answer. With a sigh, she turned the bedside lamp on again and reached for her notepad.

" _Because that's when I knew I wanted to have sex with you, but I'm not ready for a baby,"_ she held up the paper as if this shouldn't need to be explained.

"How did you get on the pill?" Eric was still reeling.

" _Gran took me to the doctor, I had an exam, and they gave me pills,"_ She still wasn't comprehending his disbelief. Wasn't this what women did?

"Gran knows!?" Eric yelped, quickly losing his momentum in the situation.

" _I told her I've had desires for it. She's the one who suggested the pill,"_ Sookie was losing patience in the conversation. _"But the moment's gone now, so forget it."_

"Oh, I can get the moment back," Eric told her without concern. "I'm just surprised that you've been thinking about this."

" _Why?"_

"Because…" How did he tell her he never thought of her as pragmatic? Sookie waited for his answer, and a small wound tore at her self-esteem. She wondered if he felt that expecting sex from him was egotistical. "Because you're such a romantic. I guess I saw this going a different way."

" _What way is that?"_ Sookie asked.

"Candles, music, family members not being on either side of your bedroom," Eric responded. "I guess I was the romantic. I want it to be special for you… For us."

" _I can wait,"_ Sookie felt terrible that she was trying to steal something he wanted from him.

Eric laughed, "Oh, you can?" She nodded as if she hadn't heard the joke in his words. "Then give me some time to plan it out. I want it to be perfect for you," he leaned in to give her another kiss. "Right now, I should probably sneak out of your house and get back to my own bed. We both need a good night's sleep if we're going to survive your birthday in the morning. It's a drive to that horseback riding place."

" _ **You**_ _woke_ _ **me**_ _up,"_ she reminded him.

"I know I did," he laughed, "but you can't go pretending you didn't love every minute of it." Sookie pouted. He was right. "I'll see you in the morning. I love you, I love you," he told her as he kissed her one last time before heading for her window. "Sleep tight."

Sookie waved to him as he climbed out her window and dropped to the ground below. She rose from bed to make sure he landed safely, and when she saw him sprint across the lawn, she sighed to herself.

 _Tonight could have been perfect for me,_ she thought. _As long as it was with you, it would have been perfect._

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE, REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **-Andi**


	12. Chapter 12

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Twelve: I Promise**

 _~ "I can't believe you're actually serious about this," Godric was still stunned by his brother's declaration._

" _Why is that?" Eric asked as he began putting away the tea set. His sister was still holding her cup to her mouth in shock._

 _His siblings both sputtered a moment before Pam pointed out, "You're leaving for college in three months!"_

" _So?" Eric snatched Pam's teacup from her hand and put it on the serving tray to return to the kitchen._

 _Pam was about to continue her protests, but Godric placed a hand on her shoulder, "Eric's always done exactly what he's wanted. If he's made up his mind, Sookie's the only one that can stop him now."_

" _Are you guys that worried?" Eric demanded._

" _For Sookie," they replied in unison.~_

Thankfully, Eric had achieved what he wanted out of that fatiguing conversation a week ago. Godric and Pam had decided to spend the following weekend in New Orleans, and Eric had the house to himself. With a little help in the kitchen before they left, Eric had a pleasant dinner set up when Sookie rang the bell.

"Hi," Eric greeted her at the door nervously. She tilted her head at his worried expression, but still gave one of her dazzling smiles. "I'm glad Godric could drop you off before they left for their trip."

" _Why aren't you going?"_ Sookie asked as she came into the house.

"Because I'm going off to college soon, and I want to spend as much time with you as possible before that happens," Eric explained as they walked to the dining room together.

" _Not eating in the kitchen?"_ Sookie asked as she saw the place settings.

"No," he was growing more and more nervous, and Sookie wanted to soothe his tension.

She wished she could say that he didn't have to go through all the trouble of a romantic dinner just to have sex with her. She was ready! She was primed! _Let's do this!_ She excitedly thought.

Eric pulled her chair out for her and Sookie glanced back to make sure he wasn't about to keel over before she sat down. He was up and down from his chair a half dozen times before they even managed to cut into their dinner.

" _Eric, calm down,"_ Sookie comforted. _"You don't have to try so hard!"_

"Can I get the hard part out of the way now?" Eric asked suddenly.

Sookie's eyes widened. _What? Is he going to push all the dishes away and do me on the dining room table?_ She wondered but was a bit aroused with the notion. So, with mixed expectations, Sookie nodded her head in agreement.

Letting out a relieved breath, Eric stood from his seat and came over to Sookie. When he lifted her from her chair, her heart began to race. "One day, I'll do this more formally, but for now, I only need _you_."

Sookie was stuck on the word 'formally.' _Is he planning on calling in a group of witnesses and a notary over our sex life?_

"Sookie, it's not much, but it's what I have right now," Eric told her as he took her hand in his own. "You don't have to wear it until after you graduate, but will you accept my ring and agree to be my wife?"

His girlfriend's jaw slung open in surprise as Eric's free hand opened a small, black box dexterously. Inside was a ring far grander than anything she would have expected ever to receive. _Wait, this whole night has nothing to do with sex!?_ Sookie stared at him in wonder.

"Sookie, I know this thing doesn't look like it weighs much, but it feels like a boulder right now," Eric whispered. "I need you to answer."

 _YES!_ She frantically nodded as she pushed her left hand at him and brought her right palm to her mouth in an attempt to stifle her sob.

Eric let out a long breath as he slid his ring onto her finger. She immediately grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in for a deep kiss. "Dinner," he mumbled against her mouth, and she pulled away to shake her head 'no.' Sex was happening, and it was happening this instant!

Still holding the front of his shirt, Sookie led Eric toward the stairs, but it was obvious that whatever nerves had been wracking her boyfriend- _No! Fiancé!_ She thought delightedly- were no longer an issue.

Before her foot could touch on the first step, Eric scooped her up and began bounding up the stairs. Sookie grinned as she clung to him excitedly. When they arrived at his bedroom, Sookie felt her first burst of nervousness as she was laid out on the bed. With only a few crummy romance novels to guide her, she was finally feeling the distance between her level of experience and Eric's.

Mercifully, Eric merely layered himself over her and began kissing her deeply. _Okay, I know how to do this. Go with the flow. Pretend it's like learning to dance. Let him lead and pay attention how to follow-OH!_ His hand cupped her breast and gave her nipple a sharp tug. The sensation caught Sookie off guard as having her breasts played with didn't typically send a shock wave to her sex, but this time, the edge of roughness caused a deep thrum to echo inside her womb.

Eric grinned against her mouth, finally having unlocked the attention her breasts needed to stir a response. The tempting globes weren't overly sensitive, and that meant he could be firmer than he was accustomed.

As his hand squeezed and plucked at her breast, Sookie found her hips wanted to move as well. Just as she was beginning to calm down, Eric pulled away and smiled at her. At her curious look, he gave her a quick peck on the mouth before rising and heading to the CD player. He pushed play on the tape deck and began padding back to the bed while removing his shirt.

Sookie's lip found its way between her teeth as she watched his bare chest appear. She'd only seen him a few times with his shirt off, and the most recent time had been when they went swimming while staying in Texas. The sight was a glorious one to behold, and Sookie felt the last of her nerves melt away. Pretty soon that tempting torso would be mashed against hers, and his perfect butt would be within her hands' reach. Her fingers itched to give his rear a good squeeze, but she remained still on the bed as he returned to her with another kiss.

Once more she was beneath him, and their kisses began anew as Jimi Hendrix sung about being Bold as Love. Over the past months, Eric's mixtape had become the soundtrack of their lives, and seventeen songs that crooned through their experiences together played an infinite loop in Sookie's head.

"I love you, Sookie. I love you," Eric told her as he began lifting the hem of her sundress. Sookie arched so he could push it from under her bottom and then sat up so it could come over her head. When she sat in front of him in nothing but her lacy, soft pink underwear set, Eric knew that his fiancée had arrived with expectations for the evening. _She's my fiancée!_ He thought happily.

As Eric reached for her, Sookie took a steadying breath. When his hand snaked behind her, she had no time to be curious because the clasp of her bra immediately came undone. _I guess those jokes about men and bras is not a universal truth,_ Sookie realized as she sat bare-breasted in front of Eric.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to suck and nibble on these," he told her as he leaned in to do just that. Admittedly, Sookie found it a lot more enjoyable than she thought she would. His touch was solid, and she felt pleasant little aches shoot from her nipples once more to her sex as his mouth sucked one nipple and his fingers tugged the other.

Soft noises began to tumble from Sookie's lips, and she found herself laying on the bed as Eric licked and sucked his way down to the border of her panties. With a short hesitation to give her time to stop him, Eric proceeded to remove the last scrap of her clothing. Sookie glanced down at him as he pushed her legs open and groaned pleasurably as his tongue began to caress her pussy. She reached down to bury her fingers in his hair, and her knees bowed a bit wider as she enjoyed the building tension in her womb.

She could feel her climax growing after a short while. She wasn't sure how long Eric had been licking and pushing his fingers inside her, but she knew that the edge of her orgasm was on the horizon.

"Ahh," her mouth uttered as she found the precipice, but before she could tumble over, Eric pulled away.

"Wait for me," Eric whispered as he ran his hands up and down her thighs. "I don't think I'll be able to last long… It's been a while," he confessed as he began removing the remainder of his clothes. Sookie panted as she felt her proximity to bliss grow more distant, but the sight of Eric's cock as he dropped his jeans and boxers caused a whole new pulse inside her.

 _Oh,_ she stared at the beast that had been poking her for months beneath the cover of his clothes. _Okay, he's had other girls take it. I can take it… Right?_ She found herself breathing harder as anxiety and anticipation ran rampantly through her body. Delving deep, Sookie found her resolve, and the part of her that had no fear.

Sookie reached for him as she found her confident side, and took him boldly into her hand. Eric was surprised as she began to stroke him, and secretly thanked God he had the presence of mind to jerk off earlier in the day.

Her exploratory touches and intense observation filled Eric with a combination of affection and amusement as he watched her explore him. Relief came as he realized she wasn't getting nervous.

 _Oh, God, stop staring at me!_ Sookie thought as she glided her hand up and down over his cock. His stunned gaze was making her self-conscious, and she was starting to worry he wasn't liking what she was doing. With the only course of action, she could think of, Sookie put her hand above her eyes as if she were blocking out the sun. _Phew,_ just the loss of him in her peripheral eased some of her jitters.

She focused her attention back to her exploration. A bead of fluid had begun to drip from the tip of her fiancé's shaft, and Sookie ran her thumb over it, curious about the consistency. Her thumb glided over the slit, and she was captivated by the spongy head of his cock. As she grew more emboldened without feeling his gaze on her, her stroke became more self-assured. Then, without warning, Eric's hand took hers and made her release him. _Oh! Was I doing something wrong?_ She softly moaned as she was drawn back until she lay on the bed.

"Sookie," Eric's voice was considerably lower than usual, "I don't want to rush you, but you're driving me crazy. If you keep stroking it like that, I'm never going to get inside of you!" His hand slid between her thighs to pump his fingers a bit longer into the space he wanted to explore most of all. "I think tugging on me got you even wetter." Sookie's cheeks glowed at his observation.

As his fingers dipped in and out of her passage, she felt the heel of his palm rubbing carefully over her clit. Sookie found the sensation to be a teasing one and shimmied her hips in search of a more fulfilling experience.

Sookie never found the angle she was looking for because Eric's hand left the space between her legs so that his hips could settle in their place. As his body lowered over hers, and his arms formed a cage on either side of her head, Sookie felt his length come to rest against her pelvis.

"Feeling alright?" Eric asked, and for the first time since his proposal, Sookie could feel his nervousness. For some reason that made her feel better. Knowing that he was uncertain made her feel like he had more consideration for her. Not preoccupied with what he was doing, Eric was concerned about pleasing her. He wanted this experience to be perfect for her, and at that moment it was.

Sookie nodded as she raised her knees and gently pinched Eric's hips with them. He smiled down at her and captured her mouth for another kiss. One of his arms reached between them, and she felt him tracing the head of his shaft against her slit. The way it glided smoothly against her opening made Sookie relax further. That soft, liquid sensation assured her that they were meant to join like this.

Tilting her hips, she felt him begin to slip inside and instinctively held her breath. His hand was back at her clit, rubbing gently as just the head of his cock slid in and out at the very edge of her opening.

"Mmm," she simpered as a breath of air escaped.

More of her juices began to coat him as he rocked and rubbed. His movements became more comfortable, and his stroke became deeper until he reached a point that made Sookie let out a surprised 'ah!' and grasp him.

"I got you," Eric assured her as the arm by her head bent to support him on his forearm and press their bodies closer. "Are you alright?" Sookie nodded with a deep breath. "Do you want me to stop for a minute?" he asked, and she shook her head. "You're sure?" She nodded and used her knees to give him a gentle tug. Soon he was buried to the hilt inside her and sought her lips for another long, calming kiss.

Eric remained relatively still as he began rubbing her just above where they joined. Sookie was breathing normally again and was staring at him wondrously. She wanted to tell him how good he felt, how good he made her feel. Every little movement inside her was easily distinguishable, and Sookie desired to hold him there always.

"I'm going to start moving, Sookie," Eric whispered as his hips began to draw away. Sookie moaned from the loss, but let out an approving noise as his member slid back in. "Give me your hand," the love of her life encouraged as he stopped rubbing her to reach for her right hand. Sookie opened her eyes as she felt her arm raise and bashfully watched as Eric ran his tongue over her fingertips, "Show me the right way to touch you, Sookie," he told her as he placed her hand over her pleasure point and waited with intense curiosity.

Eric sighed with a bit of relief as Sookie's hand went to work on her clit. The loss of the task made it easier to concentrate on keeping his orgasm in check. It was hot to watch her rubbing herself, but he could enjoy it with a more detached marvel. _I got this,_ he thought with an essence of alleviation.

Just as Eric was able to start enjoying himself, and discovered a sense of confidence that he wouldn't go off too early, Sookie surprised him by twisting her hips beneath him as if she were trying to get away. Eric looked at her face worriedly and found her looking away with a glazed, panting expression. Her walls tightened down on him, her hips arched harder, and Eric found his fingers digging into her hips to try and grasp onto the control that seemed so well within his reach. _I don't got this!_ He realized as she cried out with an orgasm and her tight, squeezing walls milked him for his climax.

"GOD, FUCK!" Eric shouted as he slammed his hips tightly against Sookie's and let out a regretful snarl as his release shot deep inside. _I'll get better,_ he promised himself. _She'll loosen up, and I'll get better,_ he reasoned as his cock experienced intermittent tremors that seemed to synchronize with her own.

Sookie stared dazedly up at her fiancé until her body began to calm down and she ran her hand briskly over the arm that kept him suspended above her. He seemed to realize he'd frozen above her and finally fell to his side to pull her against his chest.

"I like holding you like this," he mumbled as he hugged her tighter. "Rub my arm for 'yes' and tap it for 'no,' okay?" She rubbed his arm. "You feeling okay."

" _Yes,"_ She wiggled back contentedly.

"He's not waking up for a while," Eric laughed. "You'll know when he's ready again," he promised. "Do you hurt anywhere?"

" _No."_

"I'm glad," Eric sighed as he kissed the back of her head. "I love you, Sookie. Thank you for agreeing to marry me."

 _How the heck do I respond yes or no to that!_ Sookie thought in bewilderment as she tried to turn over in his arms.

"No, stay just like this," Eric whispered. "I want to tell you something important, but I can't if you're looking at me." Sookie remained still as her future husband built up his nerve. "You know how I feel about your voice. You know that it's never mattered to me how you tell me your feelings so long as you do. The other day when I told you that I loved you, and I saw how much it hurt you not to be able to say it back… I'm sorry… But I'm sorry that I'm _not_ sorry for that. Sookie, have you loved me for a long time?" he asked. She rubbed his forearm slowly. "I fell in love with you on Christmas Eve," he told her, "and it wasn't because you made me jizz in my pants." Sookie snorted with a laugh. "It was when we were driving, and you were listening to the tape I made for you. You fell in love with the music, and I fell in love with you."

 _But so many of the songs were love songs,_ Sookie considered. _Was he already feeling all that, and seeing my reaction just cemented what he already felt?_ She pulled at Eric's arms, forcing him to hold her tighter. After he was asleep, she'd be able to sit down with a pen and paper. She'd be able to express everything she felt. She'd be able to ask all the questions to which she desired answers.

Soon.

{†}

Admittedly, it was much harder to get out of bed with Eric than to get into it. She wasn't talking about the fact he was nearly laying on top of her, and that his weight was like an immovable boulder. Sookie was observing that his warmth was welcoming, and she wanted to stay right where she was.

Still, she had a million questions running through her head. _What did he mean by not wearing his ring until after I graduate? How long does he want to be engaged before we get married?_ Sookie wasn't a big fan of long engagements. If people were so unsure about their relationship, then they probably should have waited to get engaged. _Then again, if financial or health-related problems come up, I can see wanting to wait it out…_

Shaking off her derailed train of thought, Sookie finally shimmied out of bed and went to Eric's desk. There was a pen resting on the table top, and she grabbed his decommissioned notebook to start her list of inquiries.

"Mmm, what are you doing? Come back to bed," Eric mumbled as he sat up twenty minutes later. Sookie didn't even have the chance to turn and look at him before a strong arm had snagged her around the middle and began dragging her back to bed. "What are you writing?" he blinked several times when he discovered his old physics notebook had come along with Sookie.

Sookie handed him the notebook, and he began reading, "Oh, is this like the sex page you gave me last month?" Eric asked as he pushed his pillows back to prop himself up. He pulled Sookie into his side, draping his arm over her as the other held up the questions. "'What do I tell Gran?'," he read. "Well, you don't have to tell her much more than that you said 'yes.' I already asked her permission, and considering you're not coming home tonight; I think she can guess what your response was." Sookie's eyes widened, but she was too stunned to hear that Gran didn't object to Eric asking her to marry him. Gran had always been a somewhat idealistic blend of traditionalist and modernist.

"Let's see, what's next? 'Why can't I wear your ring until after graduation?'" Eric glanced at her. "Do you want to wear it now?" Sookie nodded. "Then wear it. I just thought you might not like being the center of attention being the only engaged woman in school."

 _Oh, that makes more sense,_ Sookie smiled sheepishly.

"As for how long we're engaged," Eric considered, "I really wouldn't mind getting married next summer, but I don't get my inheritance until after Pam gets at least a four-year college degree. I might not make any real money until after I finish college. We were given tuition stipends, and a small allowance for the time we're in school. It's generous, but it'll be tight with two people living on it."

" _How much would we need to balance?"_ Sookie asked. Gran had taught her to be thrifty, so she had hopes that she could keep their budget-

"Two grand a month for living expenses," Eric told her.

Though Sookie wasn't aware of the costs of apartments in or near New Orleans, she had a feeling that a young couple could manage three years in a one bedroom or even a studio apartment. The odds of that costing even a grand seemed unlikely. She felt confident that she could manage that sort of budget between the two of them.

 _Maybe I can find a job in the city. My signing is getting better,_ she considered as Eric read on.

"Yes, Sookie, you can _definitely_ visit me at school. Any time," Eric smiled at her. "You can even drop in for surprise inspections if you want."

" _I trust you."_

"Well that's a relief," Eric laughed. "'I want ba-'" Eric stopped reading the next question. It wasn't a question at all. It was a declaration. "Sookie, you've told me that babies are important to you." She gestured for him to read on. "'Is _five_ okay!?'" he asked anxiously. "You want _five_!?"

" _At least,"_ she told him happily.

Eric stared at the paper as if she'd just handed him a positive pregnancy test. He knew with his split of the inheritance, being financially responsible for five children was more than within his means, but the idea of five little Eric and Sookie Juniors looking to him for love and attention was daunting.

"Uh, can we negotiate the numbers later?" Eric asked. "As long as I accede to two now?"

Sookie smiled as she reached her face upward for a kiss. _"That's fine for now,"_ she told him as she pulled away.

"I know we can't plan for everything, but can we _try_ waiting until I finish college before we start working on that?" he asked. Sookie nodded in agreement and Eric went back to reading her questions. "'Where will we live after you finish school,'" he read. "I don't have my heart set on any particular place. I think we can leave that one for later. Unless you had somewhere in mind? Did you want to come back to Bon Temps?" He was well aware that a few months ago, she was certain she wanted to live _anywhere_ but Bon Temps. When she shrugged disinterestedly, Eric decided it was a conversation for much later. After all, they easily had four years to come to a decision. "Is that it for now?" Eric asked in surprise.

Sookie pointed to her ring, _"With this, that's all I need now."_

Eric smiled and threw his notebook on the ground before turning to layer himself over his fiancée. "In that case," he whispered, "are you up for a little more celebrating?"

Her reply was to smile and pull him in for a kiss that quickly evolved into so much more. "Will you take my name when we get married?" Eric asked as he began kissing down her throat. He pulled away long enough to see her nod, and it made him smile. "I'm glad."

 _Why wouldn't I take your name, Silly?_ Sookie looked into Eric's eyes with fondness as his kisses intensified. The warmth of their skin, the heat of his breath, and that excited glint in his eyes when she agreed to take his name were all seductive in their own ways.

"I would stay in this room with you all summer if we could," Eric whispered as he gave the space between her thighs a soft nudge with his hardening member. Sookie gave him a why-am-I-not-surprised look, and he smiled. "Not just for the sex," he laughed even as he rocked his hips and let his shaft become coated with the wetness she was producing in response to the fact he was sliding tauntingly against her clit. "I mean just being left alone to be together, and forgetting the world for a while."

Sookie considered his point a moment. In August she would be back in school. She had no classes with Pam, and would only see her at lunchtime. Eric would be in New Orleans. For the first time since meeting the Northmans, she would be alone throughout most of her day. The thought made her sad and a little anxious.

She could do with turning off the world for a while as well. That was why she reached between them and placed the head of his cock against her opening before wrapping her limbs securely around his torso. Eric groaned as he began to slip back into his new haven. Pressing her into the bed, Eric kissed and licked her throat as he tried to find just the right angle to allow one of his hands the opportunity to explore. The young man ran his hand up and down her side. On the upstroke, he would squeeze her breast, and then he would pull her in for a tighter collision of their sexes when his fingers dug into her hip. Sookie grunted passionately at his thrusts but occasionally felt him so deeply that it was almost painful.

As their bodies smashed rhythmically to some natural beat within them, Eric wrapped his arms tightly around his future wife as he pushed in close and deep. Sookie was gasping with every thrust, and he felt like he wanted nothing more than to crawl as far inside her as possible. Eric captured her mouth and tangled his tongue with hers. His fingers dug into the softness of her body, but he just couldn't get as close as he wanted. When his body began to tense with an impending orgasm, he felt her legs tighten around his sides. He felt her fingers twist in his hair. Finally, she was holding him how he needed, and it was that sensation which brought him over the edge. Feeling like one giant being. Feeling whole.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Thirteen: All Good Things**

"Don't cry, Sookie," Eric soothed as he hugged his fiancée tightly. They were standing in his dorm as Godric dragged Pam away to give the couple some privacy. "It's only nine months, and we'll be together every break. You'll come and visit too, right?" he reminded. Sookie nodded as she swiped away another tear that was falling. "And I'll sneak up for a few weekends here and there. We'll survive it."

" _I know,"_ Sookie sniffled as she dove in for another embrace. When she pulled away, she told him, _"If you miss one single letter, I'll drive down here and give you a whooping!"_

Eric grinned, "You realize that's more of an incentive to _not_ write you a letter, right?"

" _And you won't get sex after the beating."_

"Well, I can't get sex from a letter, but at least I'd still get to see and feel you even if you're beating me up," Eric still hadn't found the bad side to this scenario. 

" _And you'll make me very sad."_

"Oh, then I'll have to make sure I don't miss a single letter," Eric smiled as he gave her a sweet kiss.

"Sorry!" a voice made them jump out of their embrace. "I'm just dropping off my bag!" a rather handsome man with luxurious looking hair that fell in loose, dark curls slipped into the room. The newcomer was large in his musculature, and Sookie had a feeling the pair would probably end up going to the gym together. "I'm Alcide Herveaux."

"Eric Northman," Eric greeted. "This is my fiancée, Sookie."

Sookie gave a wave and tentative smile. This was her first formal introduction as Eric's future wife!

"Whoa!" Alcide laughed. "Congrats. My girlfriend and I picked the same college too. We've been together since eighth grade, but we've known each other since diapers," he seemed embarrassed to admit it. "She's in her own room putting things away. Do you know who your roommate is yet, Sookie?"

"Sookie has one year of high school left," Eric explained. "She's just here to see me off."

"That sucks," Alcide frowned. "Well, taken men need to stick together in college. Otherwise, everyone tries to get you to cheat!"

Sookie flinched as she twisted her engagement ring on her finger. She trusted Eric, but she didn't like the idea of him having to wade through swarms of half-naked college women to get to his classes.

"Are you planning on coming to UNO next year, Sookie?" Alcide asked of her. When she shrugged half-heartedly, Eric's roommate became uncomfortable with her coldness.

"Sookie can't speak," Eric informed him. "She's not trying to be shy or rude."

"Oh… I wish I knew how to sign that I was sorry," Alcide mumbled.

"It's this," Eric gestured the sign for an apology, "but she's not deaf. She just can't use her voice." Sookie let out a huff. "Okay, she can't use her voice on purpose." She smirked.

Alcide's brow furrowed, "What does that mean?"

"If you surprise her, or if she gets hurt sometimes she'll make a sound," Eric explained. "Involuntary sounds, things she can't control."

Eric's new roommate looked at Sookie before nodding, "I see… Well, I'll leave you two alone to finish saying goodbye. I have to go find Debbie. That's my girlfriend," he said before waving goodbye.

When Alcide left the room, Sookie looked to her fiancé with a bit of trepidation. _What if he always has to fight off college girls? What if the guys make fun of him because of me?_ Sookie didn't ask any of these things, she just leaned against his chest and wrapped her arms around him.

"Everything will be alright, Sookie," Eric assured her. "I'll write you every week just like we agreed. I'll call every night to say goodnight." Sookie smiled and squeezed him tightly. "I love you, Sookie." She pulled away to look up at him and offer him one last kiss. When he held her face and tangled their tongues together, she thought she might break down crying.

 _I don't want to go…_

{†}

 _~August 31, 1997_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Classes are looking pretty good. I'm not really worried about any of my first semester courses. Most of them are just the usual prereqs. There's a gym on campus, so I've been making a couple friends there. A guy named Quinn spots for me a lot of the time. His name's actually John, but he asks to be called Quinn. My roommate, Alcide, is there pretty often, too. It turns out he's from Shreveport, so he knows where Bon Temps is which is a miracle to find anyone who's heard of that shithole._

 _Alcide's girlfriend is… interesting. I actually prefer when they hang out in her room or go out altogether. She's got an ego that could put mine to shame (don't roll your eyes!), and she spends more time in front of a mirror than Pam._

 _Other than working out and going to classes, I've just been studying and trying to come up with things to write to you about. I miss you. That's really the long and short of it. That's the only thing I think about when I'm not doing school stuff._

 _Love you, love you,_

 _-Eric~_

{†}

"Come on, Freshmen! Drink!" John Quinn eagerly thrust a beer at Eric.

"No thanks," Eric declined. "I don't drink on the weekdays. Besides you're a Freshmen too. Why are you calling me 'Freshmen'?"

"We got us a Weekend Warrior!" Quinn roared, ignoring Eric's point. "So what are you doing in a bar on a weekday night if you don't drink on the weekdays?"

"Alcide's in our room with Debbie," Eric replied as he tried to work on his fundamentals of accounting class. "The library is too quiet."

"Isn't your girlfriend a mute?" Quinn snorted as he sidled up beside his friend. "I thought you'd be used to the quiet!"

"That's my point." The cozy quiet always made him think of Sookie, and that was not a good way to get work done. With no Sookie to go home to, the quiet only made him homesick. Even after two and a half months of being in college, he still felt homesick for her. "And don't call her a mute."

Shaking off Quinn's hand on his shoulder and pushing away the beer in front of his face, Eric went toward the bathroom to use the payphone. It was almost time to tell Sookie 'goodnight', and he hoped she didn't mind the sound of the bar in the background.

The phone rang only once before it was picked up, and Eric smiled to himself, visualizing Sookie sitting in front of the phone, waiting for his call.

"Goodnight, Sookie. I love you, I love you," Eric said into the phone. He heard her lips smack with a kissing sound and he smiled. "I miss you." When she hung up, Eric sighed and wished he was able to hear about her day every night. That was what their letters were for, but he longed to have more…

By the time eleven o'clock rolled around, and Eric knew it was safe to return to his room, he was tired and ready to go to bed, but he stopped by the private mailbox office as he did every day. Sookie would send him care packages from time to time, and he'd been warned by his brother that some dorm mailboxes were not at all reliable. Therefore, since he and Sookie were entirely dependent on their letters, Eric had gotten a private mailbox at a location with a 24/7 lobby.

Opening his box, Eric smiled at the small parcel inside and a separate letter. Grabbing both of them, he finally headed back to his dorm.

Alcide was sprawled across his bed when Eric came in and sat up quickly when he saw the box.

"Sookie cookies!?" his roommate demanded excitedly.

"Maybe," Eric laughed as he set his box on the floor and mail on the desk. Opening it, he shook his head. "No cookies." Alcide deflated. "Muffins."

"MUFFINS!" Alcide leaped from the bed and grabbed a muffin from his roommate. "You picked the best future wife!" he moaned as he stuffed the baked good in his mouth. "She cooks and writes you all the time! Debbie sees me every day and sometimes doesn't say a word."

Eric had no idea why his roommate was so loyal to his girlfriend but knew better than to stick his nose into anything. The last thing he needed was to accidentally break them up and have to deal with a pissed off roommate for the rest of the school year.

"She sent you muffins and a letter?" Alcide asked in a muffin muffled voice.

Eric looked at the envelope, "No… This is from Gran."

"Aw, your grandmother writes you too? Jeez, you'd think I don't even exist!" he laughed as Eric opened the strangely thick envelope.

"No, it's Sookie's grandmother, not mine."

"Why would she write you?"

"I have no idea-" Eric's hand struck something hard and plastic, and for some reason, his heart lurched. _OH GOD, IT'S A PREGNANCY TEST!_ He thought worriedly until he realized it was the wrong shape and size to be a pregnancy test. _Why am I freaking out about pregnancy tests all the time?_ He wondered as he pulled out a cassette tape.

"Your fiancée's grandmother made you a mix tape?" Alcide asked curiously.

Eric shrugged as he read the label, "Listen First. Letter Second."

Even more confused, Eric went over to the CD and cassette player and put the tape in. He pushed play and listened with increasing bafflement as nothing but the sound of air crackling over the recorder filled the room.

" _Sookie,"_ Gran's voice called softly in a whisper.

" _Eric?"_

Eric's heart leaped into his throat. His hands cupped over his mouth as he listened harder.

" _Sookie,"_ Gran called again, her voice lowering a bit further.

" _Eric… Miss you…"_

The tape's audio changed, and he knew that was the only recording on the tape. Immediately he popped the tape out and grabbed a pen to remove the safety tab. He laughed when he saw that Gran had already done this for him. She knew he'd want to keep the tape forever.

"Was that your fiancé's voice?" Alcide asked in surprise, though not nearly as blown away as Eric.

"Yes!" Eric laughed as he reached for Gran's letter. "Sometimes she would mumble in her sleep, but I've never heard her form complete words!"

 _~Dear Eric,_

 _Imagine the surprise on this old woman's face when she woke up in the middle of the night to use the facilities and heard her granddaughter's speak for the first time in nine years! She dreams about you a lot, but I don't think she remembers them._

 _Yes, I've told her about her sleep talking, and she's going to see a specialist this week to discuss what this new development could mean. I don't want you getting your hopes up, but I still thought that you of all people deserved to hear her voice. Isn't it such a beautiful, sweet voice?_

 _Anyway, enjoy the tape, and I look forward to seeing you for Thanksgiving._

 _Love always,_

 _Gran_

 _P.S. Make sure to check your mail on Friday right after class. I'm sending something that won't keep over the weekend.~_

"I don't want to sound… Can I listen to it again?" Eric whispered as he stared at the tape.

Alcide smiled at his roommate before reaching into his bedside table and tossing his walkman at Eric. "Listen as many times as you want."

The recording was only a minute long because of the spacing between Gran's prodding and Sookie's responses, but Eric listened to it five times before he managed to fall asleep.

{†}

 **Sookie's School Year**

Sookie had almost forgotten what it felt like to be afraid to go to school. Every day of her Senior year, she was reminded what the years before the Northmans arrived had been like. The first time she was body checked into a locker, she had felt staggered. By the third time her books had been slapped out of her hands, she remembered she needed to hug them tightly to her chest rather than balance them on her hip like a baby.

When August ended, she fell back into her old routines. Lunch with Pam only eased some of the loneliness, and her friend regularly remarked that Sookie had lost her luster.

" _It's nothing,"_ Sookie assured her as she poked at her lunch. If Pam wasn't noticing anything, Sookie wasn't about to bring it up. Sookie could only hope that her friend would think the gloom surrounding her was due to Eric's absence. The thought of Pam trying to take the place of her fiancé and her brother as a bodyguard made Sookie worried.

 _If I just keep my head down,_ Sookie thought as they left the lunch table and headed for Pam's next class. _If I don't bother anyone… Maybe it won't be so terrib_ le.

But even that didn't work as Bill Compton spotted her coming down the hall. He had been the first person to antagonize her after school started back up. She remembered him staring her right in the eyes and then smacking her books from her hands as if to declare that 'Sookie Season' was now open. After that single attack, the rest had come like machine gun fire. Her locker door was constantly closed on her, catching her fingers and hand on several occasions. She'd been shoved onto the ground and against lockers multiple times in just a couple weeks. By the start of September, Sookie wondered if she could survive. It was as if the assaults had doubled from previous years to make up for the fact no one had touched her Sophomore/Junior year.

It was halfway through September when Jason began to notice something was not right with his sister.

"Sook," Jason frowned, "it's still hot as hell out. Why're you wearing long sleeves?" When his sister ignored his question, he got up and grabbed her by the wrist. She struggled to bat his hand away, but he yanked her sleeve up until the multiple splotches of green, purple and yellow glared up at him. "The fuck, Sookie?" he checked her other arm. "Who's coming at you like this?"

Sookie jerked her arm from his loosened grasp and went back to clearing the table.

"Gran, do you know about this?" Jason demanded.

Adele sighed as she washed the pot from dinner. She'd had her suspicions but knew better than to think Sookie would tell on anyone. Even before she'd lost her voice, Sookie had taken snitching very seriously. Jason had once gotten away with convincing their parents that Sookie had broken their mother's Christmas plate when it had actually been him. Sookie hadn't even tried to defend herself.

 _My poor Sookie,_ Adele thought sadly, _why do you think you deserve all of this?_

It was around October that Sookie started hearing the whispers. She endured the snickering as her classmates commented on how much pussy her _fiancé_ was getting now that he wasn't giving her a pity relationship. She ignored the remarks that Eric had only proposed to give her something to look forward to after graduation. She even managed to smile a little when she overheard someone say that Eric's proposal was the only one she'd ever get. _Duh,_ she'd thought condescendingly, _because I'll be married and not likely to receive another!_

Still, even with mental comebacks, Sookie felt the weight of their words on her heart. She missed Eric more than ever, and perhaps that was the reason why she'd begun talking in her sleep.

Gran was waiting for her in the kitchen the morning after hearing her granddaughter talking in her sleep. She looked tired but surprisingly chipper despite the fatigue.

"Sookie," Gran smiled at her, "I have something for you."

Sookie tilted her head curiously as Gran held out a tape recorder and pushed play.

" _Sookie,"_ came Gran's voice.

" _Eric?"_

Sookie's eyes widened at the voice she heard, and she fell into the kitchen chair.

" _Sookie."_

" _Eric… Miss you…"_

Sookie looked at her grandmother, a stunned expression on her face.

"You finally spoke," Gran smiled at her.

Sitting frozen a moment longer, Sookie finally scrambled for a pen and paper, _"What does this mean?"_

"I think it means that maybe you should finally see a therapist again," Gran pointed out. "I planned on calling around today while you're at school. Is that alright?"

Sookie nodded numbly as she grabbed the recorder, rewound it and played it again. She listened to it twice more before writing, _"Can you send this to Eric?"_

"Do you want me to?" Gran asked.

" _What if it's the only chance he gets to hear my voice? It's not the words I wanted him to hear, but at least they're true words,"_ Sookie explained.

"Well," Gran considered, "since you didn't technically speak them _to_ him, you could still work toward that dream. I think this will make an excellent gift for him."

" _I do miss him,"_ Sookie confessed.

"I know you do, Dear," Gran reached forward to pat her granddaughter's hand. "If you'd like, you could borrow my car and drive down to see him this weekend," she offered. Sookie looked at her in surprise. "Of course, I want you to stop every so often and just call home and press a couple buttons to let me know you're alright along the way."

Sookie considered this, but it was at least a five-hour drive, and she'd never driven outside Bon Temps before. It scared her, but New Orleans would be her home next year. Also, if she were brave, she would get to see Eric. For a single weekend, her life would be better.

" _Okay."_

That Friday, Gran called Sookie off of school and sent her on her merry way to New Orleans. If nothing else, at least her granddaughter would have a reprieve from the bullying.

Adele waited until after school hours to go visit Pam and Godric. She knew the oldest Northman boy would be back from Shreveport by the time Pam returned from school. That was why, after receiving the most recent, "I'm alive," phone call from Sookie, Adele began her trek up the road.

"Hey, Gran!" Pam greeted as she pulled up to her driveway to see Adele coming up the road. "What's up?"

"Pam," Adele caught her breath and fanned herself. The little hill around the bend always took the wind out of her. "I was hoping to have afternoon tea with you and Godric."

"Sure!" Pam agreed. Let me just park the car. "How's Sookie feeling?"

"Fine," Adele responded before following the car up the driveway and heading inside with her daughter's friend.

"Is something wrong?" Pam asked as she slid out of her car and walked up to the front door. "GODRIC! GRAN'S JOINING US FOR TEA!" she hollered as she stepped inside the house.

"I suppose you could say that," Gran sighed as she walked with Pam to the sitting room. She just adored the little tea set-up the Northman's had. It was quaint and beautiful. It reminded her of her youth. The occasional afternoon tea with girlfriends, discussing their crushes and giggling with their admittances.

"What is it?" Pam asked as she pulled a chair out for Gran and helped her slide it back in.

"Such a lady," Gran patted the girl's hand making Pam flush.

Before Pam could listen to any answers, Godric arrived in the room with their tea and snacks.

"Good afternoon, Gran," Godric greeted cheerily. "How are you doing?"

"Very well, thank you. However, I called Sookie out of school today so she could take my car down to New Orleans," Gran smiled with a distant look fogging her eyes.

"Fall Break is only a month away," Pam protested. "Are you sure it's safe for Sookie to travel that far on her own?"

"She'll be fine," Gran waved off the girl's concern. "Sookie's tough in her own ways… Which brings me to the purpose of my visit." The Northmans looked at the older woman curiously. "Pam, have you noticed anything at school lately?"

Pam's brow furrowed, "Not really, why?"

"Sookie's not acting _off_ at all?" Adele pressed.

"Well," Pam thought, "she's a lot more withdrawn at lunch. After the first day, she stopped trying to meet up with me between classes, too. I just figured her classes are too spread out to mingle between them. As for lunch… Well, she's been down, but I know she misses Eric."

"You haven't noticed any other students bothering her?" Adele asked, and Pam stared. "Or that she's taken to wearing long sleeves already?"

"She's being bullied again?" Pam sounded devastated. "Why wouldn't she tell me?"

"I don't think she wants to raise a fuss with it being her last year at school," Adele admitted. "She's just trying to muscle through, but she's never had so many bruises before. It used to be that she'd come home with the occasional one, not that she'd have _layers_ of them throughout the week."

"With Eric and Jason gone, it looks like the students are showing her she's not protected anymore," Godric frowned as he listened to the conversation. "It's as if they're trying to put her back into her place."

Pam stood sharply. "That's not right!"

"Of course it's not, Dear," Adele soothed as she gave Pam's hand a tug, encouraging her to sit back down. "Regardless, Sookie needed a break, and she really misses Eric. That's why I sent her to New Orleans for the weekend." With a soft smile, she added, "She starts therapy next week after school."

" _What_?" Pam and Godric asked in unison.

"She's started talking in her sleep. Actually talking!" Gran glowed happily. "I recorded it with Jason's cassette player and played it for her. She agreed to start going to therapy again."

"What did she say?" Godric asked curiously.

"She said Eric's name and that she missed him," Gran answered warmly. "It was very sweet. I went ahead and sent the cassette to Eric once Sookie was done with it."

"I wish I could have heard it," Pam mumbled sadly. "I'm glad she's finally agreed to see a specialist again. She told me that when she was a kid, the doctors made her feel like not being able to speak was her fault."

"What do you mean?" Adele asked curiously.

Pam looked at Gran in surprise, "You know, how they said she'd speak when she was good and ready?"

Adele's jaw slung open, "Oh, no," she shook her head, "that's not what they said at _all_."

"It's not?" Godric asked.

Adele shook her head, "No, they were talking about how she could very well regain her voice. It was described as a mental block, and _could_ dissipate with regular therapy."

"Did Sookie go to therapy?" Godric asked.

Gran placed her teacup down and replied, "Well, she did for a while. After a few months, the doctor told me that Sookie still wouldn't write to her and she refused to try and learn to sign. She said it seemed like Sookie didn't feel like she _deserved_ to get her voice back. Unless Sookie was willing to try, the doctor didn't know how much therapy could help."

"So you took her out of it and just let her be," Godric realized.

"I'm sure it was the wrong thing-"

"I'm not saying that," Godric smiled comfortingly. "Sookie _is_ tough in her own way, but she's also stubborn. I think you know that better than anyone." Adele smiled fondly. "If she got it in her head that the muteness was some sort of punishment, do you think she'd try to overcome it?"

Adele sighed, "No, she'd accept it and move on."

"Is there anything she should feel that guilty for?" Pam asked.

Adele looked at her tea for a long moment before she confessed, "I don't have all the details."

"Any would be a start," Godric encouraged. "If the therapist has a lead, maybe they can actually _help_ Sookie this time."

"I know," Adele took a deep breath, "that the day of the crash, my son and his wife were running late picking Sookie up from my house. My brother had come to visit out of the blue and agreed to watch Sookie while I went to my Descendants of the Glorious Dead meeting. Jason was at football practice, and I'm sure my son and his wife were taking advantage of putting the kids out of the house for the day like moms and dads do. The thing is… the crash happened heading back into town from the swamp. Not my house. My brother hasn't been seen since that day." Pam sucked in a quiet breath.

Godric stared for a long moment, "I don't know that I'm following."

"A few months after their deaths," Adele continued, "was when Hadley started showing signs of obvious drug use. While she was under the influence, she asked me if I thought Uncle Corbett and Aunt Michelle would still be alive if she'd told on Uncle Bartlett. She asked me if I'd forgive her if Bartlett hurt Sookie _too_." Pam looked down at her hands as Gran confirmed a terrible worry she'd been having for nearly a year.

"My son was a sweet boy," Gran continued. "Boisterous, a bit full of himself, but a _good_ boy… But if he found out his uncle did something like that to his baby… He'd kill him. If he did that to her," Adele gasped, "I don't want her to remember it… If she gets her voice back, will that mean she'll remember the crash and all the things that lead up to it?"

"There's no way to know," Godric told her honestly. "I mean… Maybe you should let the therapist know about all of this and see what they have to say."

Adele frowned at the idea of dragging her family's name through the mud over theories, but if there was a shred of truth behind any of the possibilities, it might affect their approach to helping Sookie. "I'm sorry to put the burden of all this on the two of you, but with Eric as part of the equation… I wondered if you might have an idea how he'd take all of this?"

"What do you mean?" Pam asked.

"If it turns out that Bartlett hurt Sookie, how do you think Eric would respond?" Adele rephrased.

"He'd be mad as hell," Pam answered truthfully, "and if your brother isn't dead already, Eric will take care of it."

"He wouldn't look at Sookie differently?" Adele whispered nervously.

Godric became thoughtful a moment before confessing, "He would, but I think he would be a lot more aware of her. A lot more protective."

"That's a terrifying notion," Pam mumbled as she picked up her teacup and took a long sip.

"If you're worried that he'd _leave_ her over it, well, I couldn't imagine it," Godric declared. In the last year, the oldest brother had to admit that Eric was completely serious about Sookie. He couldn't say _why_ his brother was so devoted. Sookie was a sweet girl, and she was more than capable of poking fun at Eric and making him laugh about it. Still, their relationship wasn't what anyone would call an _obvious_ one. No one looked at Sookie and Eric and thought, "Oh, they're a perfect couple! I couldn't imagine them with anyone else!" Of course, those who knew the two of them would beg to differ, but Godric would also understand the point of those looking from the outside in.

Resting her face delicately in her hand, it was Pam that settled all their minds. "Either way you slice it, it's something they'll have to get through as a couple because it impacts Sookie's ability to speak in the future. In a way, that's a big deal to Eric's future as well as Sookie's because they'll be living that future together. So, shouldn't we just leave it alone and let them deal with it however they're going to? If they need help, they'll ask for it… At least, Eric will."

Gran had to agree with that. When he'd asked for permission to propose to Sookie, he had asked many other questions. He wondered if he was right about thinking Sookie was a 'settled' type and wouldn't regret not sowing her wild oats. Gran had chuckled and answered that Sookie had strong, resilient bones, not flexible, wild ones. He'd asked how Gran would feel if he took Sookie away from Bon Temps, and she had given her blessing to take her granddaughter away; even if it meant only seeing her for major holidays.

 _I suppose,_ Gran thought with only the slightest quake in her composure, _Bon Temps has become her prison, not her home._

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Fourteen: Don't Look at Me Like That**

Sookie looked nervously at her watch as she stood in the lobby which housed Eric's private mailbox. _What if he's already come to pick up his mail?_ She worriedly glanced at the security camera that she could _swear_ was zooming in on her. _No, you just watch too many crime dramas,_ she told herself to calm down. She knew Eric had class until two, and she had managed to arrive a few minutes before his final period of the week ended.

 _What if he doesn't come to check his mailbox until the evening?_ Sookie considered as she walked over to the payphone to call the house and push a few keys on the dial. _I should just surprise him at his dorm,_ she thought as Gran picked up and she pressed the pound sign a couple times.

" _Are you in New Orleans? Push once for yes, twice for no."_ Gran told her. **BEEP** _"I'm glad you got there safely. Give Eric my love! Have fun, Dear!"_ With that, Gran hung up, and Sookie was left to wait by herself.

 _Maybe I should at least sit outside,_ she reasoned.

Before Sookie could make up her mind on what to do, Eric appeared in the lobby, staring at his fiancée in disbelief.

There was a long pause before they closed the distance between one another, and Sookie felt two full months worth of tears explode from her face. _I missed you so much,_ she hadn't realized just _how_ much until she was wrapped in his arms, and he unknowingly put pressure on the leopard print of bruises she had hidden beneath her clothes. At that moment, she didn't care about the little nips of pain each small injury gave when he touched them. Eric's arms were around her, and her tears were absorbing in his shirt. She could survive anything.

"How many stamps did Gran have to put on you to get you here?" Eric teased as he pulled away and kissed his Sookie deeply. "I missed you so much, Sookie," he told her. "God, I love you. I love you," he pulled her back into his arms and rested his chin on her head as they stood in the lobby like two very incongruous characters. "What's wrong?" he asked when Sookie's hands had yet to raise in even the simplest of greetings. When he looked at her crying eyes and red cheeks, he couldn't help but feel that her tears were about far more than pent-up longing and relief. She looked like a person who finally had a boulder removed from her chest. She looked like a woman who had finally taken her first breath in two months. "Sookie?"

Sookie shook her head and buried her face against his chest. She didn't want to ruin this moment. They were together, and that was all that mattered. He didn't need to know about the bullying right now. It would have to come up at some point during their visit. She couldn't fathom driving all this way and not ending up in bed together. He would see her bruises and then the questions would happen.

Choking on a fresh sob, Sookie realized that if she didn't come clean about the bullying now, it would just ruin their intimacy later. _I don't want to tell him!_ She clung to the front of his shirt, wanting to avoid the conversation just a moment longer.

Eric felt her breathing change dramatically as her sobs intensified. Before he knew it, ragged gasps of air became nearly hysterical, and Sookie's hold on him became one of weak desperation. He felt her weight in his arms grow heavier, and Eric quickly sat her on the ground.

"Sookie," Eric placed his hand over her mouth, "hold your breath." He felt her mouth suctioning to his hand. "Look at me," he commanded, and finally caught her wide, panicking eyes, "hold your breath." She sucked in a short breath, and Eric began counting down, "Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one." He pulled his hand away from her mouth this time, and she sucked in another breath. "Again, hold your breath." He counted down for her again, and they repeated this several times before her breathing became less distressed.

By the time Sookie was back to soft, hiccuping sobs, Eric finally asked, "Sookie, what's happening?" When her reply was to roll up her sleeves, Eric stared at the blotched bruises that ran up her forearms. "Sookie, who's been hurting you?" he tried to keep the anger out of his voice, but even with his best efforts, it still came through.

" _Everyone,"_ she responded despondently.

"What do you mean by _everyone_?" Eric asked in a tone that caused the hairs on the back of Sookie's neck to stand on end. For a brief moment, she feared for those that bullied her.

" _Anyone who feels like it,"_ she told him as she continued staring at the ground while her hands spoke for her.

"Oh, Sookie," Eric pulled her into his arms carefully. "Why didn't you mention anything in your letters?"

" _What could you do?"_ She signed sadly.

Eric sat slowly on the floor at her question and dragged her into his lap. "I could have told you to deck those mother fuckers in the throat." His hand began to stroke her hair in deliberately long pulls against her locks. He knew that she found gentle tugs of her hair soothing, and he'd put her to sleep several times over the summer with such tactics.

" _What's the point?"_ she moped as her eyes shut lazily from the careful pulling.

"The point is to show them that you're done with their bullshit, Sookie," Eric told her. "I know you're an advocator for turning the other cheek, but it's not _working_. Don't you think it's time to stop all this?"

" _It's only another six months."_

"But I don't want to see bruises on my future wife," Eric whispered. "I feel every one of these a hundred times over knowing I can't stop them from happening."

" _I'm sorry."_

"I don't want you to be sorry, Sookie. I want you to be _happy_ ," Eric moaned. "Doesn't it hurt enough being apart? Why are you letting it hurt even more?" When she didn't answer, Eric nuzzled his nose against her crown. "Whatever it is you think you deserve… You're wrong, Sookie. You don't deserve to be treated like that. No matter what you or anyone else thinks."

" _How do you know?"_ Sookie demanded weakly. Her expression was defeated and tired.

"Because you haven't lived long enough to earn this much bad karma," Eric smiled sadly. "And you're too sweet to have done anything mean to anyone on purpose."

" _I killed my mom and dad,"_ Sookie told him, and it was the first time she'd ever expressed to another person how she felt about the car crash that took her parents and her voice. Some might have guessed about her guilt, but she had never confirmed their suspicions.

"Because you survived and they didn't?" Eric asked.

" _Dad was yelling at me. If he hadn't been so mad, the car wouldn't have crashed,"_ she told him, and Eric knew that she had wanted to make this confession to him. She had found signs he hadn't taught her just so she could confess to him.

"Sookie, plenty of people have arguments while they're driving. Did you dive forward and yank the steering wheel? Did you put your hands over his eyes? I seriously doubt it. Accidents are called accidents for a reason. They're nobody's fault, they're just things that happen," Eric told her. "My father stepped in front of a bus because his wife was dying. Even if no one knows if it was on purpose or not; it doesn't mean I think my mom _killed_ my father."

Sookie stared at her fiancé in surprise. She hadn't known how his father died; not really. Eric's Aunt Maryanne had implied how the Northmans' father had been killed, but Sookie had never really considered the woman's accusation beyond that day.

"What I feel is that if your parents had a choice, they'd be happier knowing you lived instead of them," Eric told her. "If you think you had some sort of debt to repay for surviving, I think it's long past repaid."

" _I can't just turn off how I feel,"_ Sookie tried to explain.

With a long sigh, Eric could only nod, "Maybe it's something to try and work out with the specialist you'll be seeing next week." He looked at his fiancée carefully, "Can you do that for me? Can you talk to the therapist about this?"

" _If you want me to,"_ Sookie agreed.

"Please." He sighed as he began wiping the remnants of her tears away. "Have you eaten yet?" She shook her head. "There's a good pizza place near campus. How does that sound?" She nodded in agreement, and they both rose from the floor to head out.

The walk out of the lobby was awkward as Eric felt his frustration with her become more overbearing. _Why can't you see you're not a god damned punching bag!?_ He howled internally as they left Gran's Station Wagon parked and walked to the nearby pizza parlor.

When the pair clambered into an available booth, Eric leaned against the wall and pulled Sookie in until she was sprawled across him. He knew that she wasn't the biggest fan of public displays of affection, but he hadn't seen her in nearly three months. He'd be damned if he didn't keep her as close as possible for the time she could be with him.

After he'd placed their order, Eric shut his eyes and let himself get lost in the familiar sensation of Sookie's body laying on his own.

"Are you nervous about seeing the specialist?" Eric asked after a few minutes of comfortable silence. His eyes opened to see her nodding. "Will you tell me about your appointments, or do you think you'd rather keep them to yourself?"

" _I don't know,"_ she answered.

"Do whatever is best for you, Sookie," Eric encouraged. "I'll support you however you need me to."

"AH!" Sookie and Eric looked up to see a tall, tan and bald man standing over them. Eric knew him to be John Quinn, but Sookie stared wide-eyed in concern. "Is this your fiancée?" Quinn pointed at Sookie curiously.

"Do you think I'd have any other woman sprawled across me?" Eric asked with raised eyebrows. When Quinn glared at him, he sighed and introduced them. "Yes, this is Sookie. Sookie, this is Quinn. Quinn, what the fuck are you doing here?"

"It's Friday night. I'm getting a pizza, and then I'm going to a Frat party. Wanna come?" He invited the couple. "Alcide and Debbie are coming too."

"No," Eric shook his head. "Sookie's only here for the weekend. I just want to spend it with her."

Quinn gave a small, frustrated snort. "Yeah, cool. Have fun."

"If you put Alcide up for the weekend, I could?" Eric pointed out.

Quinn groaned but nodded, "Fine. Are you gonna party at _all_ while you're here?"

Eric thought for a moment before answering, "Maybe next year. Sookie will be living with me, and we'll be able to go together."

Quinn rolled his eyes, "C'mon, Sookie, take his balls out of your purse, and trust him to go out!"

Sookie thought about this a moment as she reached into her purse and took out a pen and paper. She quickly wrote a reply that Quinn leaned over to read while the pen danced across the paper.

" _It's been a couple months, but last time I checked, his balls were right where they're supposed to be."_ Reaching behind her back with her left hand, Sookie made Eric jump as she squeezed his groin. _"Yup, still there."_

Quinn roared with laughter, "Okay, okay, so your fiancée isn't as uptight as I thought she'd be." Smiling fondly at Sookie, Quinn was disappointed when the cashier at the counter called out his order number. "I'll put Alcide up for the night. You guys have a good weekend."

The couple waved goodbye as Quinn went to grab his pizza and start his weekend.

"Sorry about that," Eric mumbled as they were finally able to dig into their own dinner. "Quinn has been very intense about me enjoying my college experience."

" _Does being engaged make you feel like you're missing out?"_ Sookie wrote with her right hand and ate with her left, but something about her expression seemed more curious than concerned.

Eric shook his head and smiled, "Not at all. Sometimes other students try to make me feel like it's some sort of big deal, but I don't personally get it. I can drink and have fun whenever I want, being engaged doesn't stop that. The only thing being engaged prevents me from doing is having sex, and a single school year with infrequent sex is nothing."

" _I guess that's true. I mean, you went last school year without any sex. At least you'll be getting some when I come to visit or when you're home on break,"_ Sookie realized. _"Why don't you go to any parties?"_

Eric groaned, "I don't know… The reason the other students drink doesn't really fit my own intentions for it. It seems everyone drinks to black out or get so wasted they can't find their way home. If it were about letting off steam, that would be one thing, but everyone seems more intent on competing over it."

" _Well, you already learned a lot about your drinking limits when you were living in Europe. They don't have that advantage,"_ Sookie pointed out.

Her fiancé shook his head, "Even when I was learning my limits, it was nothing like this. It's weird as hell, Sookie." 

" _I'm not trying to tell you to get three sheets to the wind,"_ Sookie smirked. _"But you should be able to go to a party if you want."_

"I guess," Eric agreed hesitantly. "I just feel _old_ or something."

Sookie's smirk turned into an eye roll. _"Whatever you decide to do is up to you. I just want you to know that you don't have to justify any of it to me. I want you to have fun in college. I don't want you to have regrets."_

"Regrets?" Eric read. "Regretting that I didn't kill more brain cells during college seems like a very low standard." Sookie laughed at his remark and shoved the rest of her pizza into her mouth.

"So," Eric began anew once they had finished their food, "we're in New Orleans together for the weekend. What do you want to do?"

Sookie's mouth curved in a surprisingly provocative smirk as she pointed at him suggestively.

Her fiancé practically shoved Sookie out of the booth as he threw down some money and hurried her toward the door. Sookie beamed as Eric's hand on her wrist tugged her back to Gran's old Station Wagon, and he pushed back the driver's seat to get them on campus as quickly as possible.

When they arrived at the dorms, Eric glanced around, hoping not to be asked a million questions on the way upstairs. As he assessed that the coast was clear, Eric did his best to shield Sookie from view as they passed other students so as not to be disturbed. Thankfully, no one paid much mind to him, and the couple made it to Eric's room without any hassle.

"We made it!" Eric sighed in relief as he shut and locked his door.

" _Embarrassed of me?"_ Sookie teased.

"More like… Territorial of you," Eric admitted. "You're here, and I don't want to share." Sookie smiled as Eric leaned down to kiss her and begin tugging at her clothes. "I'm sorry I won't be all that romantic. I've missed you so _fucking_ much," he murmured against her lips before pulling away to strip her shirt above her head. "And these," he squeezed her breasts through her bra, "I've missed these a lot too."

He quickly unhooked her bra and took a nipple into his mouth with a firm suckle. Sookie gasped and laced her fingers into his hair as she was pushed onto the small bed. Eric released the hardening bud to look at her, but the image was marred by the brown, yellow and green splotches along her body. Mostly the bruises were light, but there was one purple spot on her rib.

"What was this?" Eric asked, tracing his finger just outside the edge of the bruise.

" _Don't worry about it,"_ Sookie encouraged him as she tugged his hair and begged for another kiss.

Choosing to overlook his concerns, for the time being, Eric reached between them to begin undoing the buttons of her jeans. She raised her hips impatiently as he started to peel them off her legs, but the bruises on her knees made him let out a frustrated sigh.

"Please," Eric sat back on his heels. "Sookie, please stop letting them do this to you. If I can't convince you that you don't deserve the punishment, fine, but seeing this hurts me. Seeing you beat up like this is _killing_ me." His hands lightly touched her legs, and he leaned forward to kiss the bruises on her knees. "Now I have to kiss every last one of these."

He was true to his word, and Sookie began to wiggle impatiently as he found and kissed every single bruise on her body. By the time he was done, she was prepared to body slam every last student in Bon Temps for making her wait to get the loving for which she'd driven five hours.

 _Finally,_ she thought in relief as he pushed her legs open and placed his tongue against her womanhood. She let out a sigh of pleasure as his fingers came to assist his efforts, but she quickly recognized that she'd missed touching him too. With that realization, Sookie pushed him away and urged a stunned Eric to lay back on the bed.

"What are-" He immediately silenced as she crawled around until she was facing away from him and straddled his face. As her sex hovered over his mouth, he felt Sookie's lips wrap around his cock. _God bless the greatest number ever invented!_

Eric moaned against her pussy as he hugged her bottom half closer to his face. While Sookie's mouth worked up and down his length, Eric lapped at her slit hungrily as his hands kneaded and spread her bottom. When he felt her take him deep into her throat, the man had to resist the urge to thrust upward. Sookie had spent much of their summer together learning how to ease him deeper and deeper into her mouth, but it seemed their nearly three months of celibacy had interrupted her learning process.

Sookie realized with annoyance that she was having trouble opening her throat enough to take Eric as far as she'd managed before he'd left for school. No matter how much she tried to relax her jaw and throat, he kept striking her tonsils and refused to descend. Thoughts of her problem were becoming distant memories, however, because Eric's mouth on her was becoming far more distracting.

Opting to suckle and lick rather than trying to sheath his entire cock, Sookie focused more of her attention on what was going on between her own legs. Eric's mouth was aggressive as ever, something she'd come to learn as she grew more comfortable with sex. He'd tug at her labia with his teeth, suction down on her clit before assaulting it with flickers of his tongue, or pump his fingers deep and hard inside of her. All of this was preparation for the grand finale when he'd build up her frustrations so high that choosing a milder but consistent rhythm was all it took to send her plummeting into orgasm. Sookie wasn't fooled; however, she could feel his cock between her lips as he became rougher. With every plunge of his fingers or every flicker of her clit, she felt his shaft give a throb in her mouth.

When the exchange grew heated, Sookie felt Eric begin to push her hips from his face. Before she could ask what was wrong, he'd pushed her onto her side and rolled her onto her back as he shoved her legs apart.

"I've missed you so much," Eric told her as he settled between her legs.

" _Gentle,"_ she reminded him as he began to push inside of her. Eric took a breath and nodded, having forgotten that she hadn't had sex in a while and it wasn't as easy to start back up for her as it was for him.

Layering his body over hers, Eric slowly nudged further inside, feeling her slick inner walls open and accept him. As she hugged herself to him, Eric kissed and licked her throat until he worked upward and found Sookie's lips. While their tongues tangled together, Eric slowly worked his hips back and forth until Sookie was panting against his mouth.

"You're so beautiful, Sookie," Eric whispered as his own breathing became uneven, and his hips began to lose control. Sookie whimpered beneath him as he rammed into her. She could feel his desperation to be closer. She wanted him to stay with her forever, to never have to return to Bon Temps. "Fuck," he ground out, "ah. I can't-" The erratic motion of his thrusts triggered something in Sookie, and she felt her walls contract around Eric as he lost his control. The intensity and emotion in the air charged her own orgasm, and she gasped for air as she felt his cock spending inside of her. She welcomed every drop of his desire.

"Sorry," Eric panted as he rolled them onto their sides. "I can go again in a bit," he promised even as his hands went between them to stroke at the juncture of her legs. When Sookie flinched away, Eric removed his hand. "You came pretty hard then, too?" he asked proudly, and Sookie wanted to deny it just to wipe the smug look off his face. However, she could only nod. "I'm glad," he leaned in to give her a softer kiss. "It's been so long, I didn't think I could go long enough to satisfy you during the first round."

When she gave him a smile that said a lot more than agreement, Eric slipped out of bed to grab a notebook and pen. He gave them to Sookie and then slipped in behind her so that they rested on their left sides, and she could write freely. Her hand moved quickly on the page, and then she held up the book for him to see, _"You came a lot."_

Eric snorted, "Yes, I did. You know I don't like to jerk it."

" _You'd rather make a mess out of me,"_ she accused.

"Every time," he agreed and hugged her tight. "Plus, I have a roommate now, so that makes it even less desirable to do." Snuggling back against her fiancé, Sookie couldn't help but agree that she liked when he made a mess out of her. "It's still pretty early," Eric whispered, "but you had a long drive. Do you want to sleep?"

Sookie wanted to protest, but she really was tired. Eric seemed to sense this, and he began combing his fingers through her hair and giving the ends soft tugs.

"We have all day tomorrow to spend together," Eric assured her. "We can go to the French Quarter, and we'll get some _real_ food while we're out." As he went on telling her about the day they'd have tomorrow, he could feel her body growing heavier against him. More of her weight leaned against him, and he welcomed the feeling.

Eric lay in bed with Sookie for nearly a half an hour before he slipped out and reached for the phone.

" _Hello?"_ Adele's voice came over the phone.

"Hey, Gran, it's Eric," Eric greeted. "I just wanted to let you know that Sookie and I met up safely and that she's here."

" _Oh, thank you, Dear,"_ Adele crooned at him, making the young man smile fondly. He couldn't remember if Gran's sweetness had always melted his heart, but he was pretty sure it did. _"She called and let me know she was in New Orleans, but it's good to know that she's safe and with you."_

"She _called_?" Eric asked softly so as not to wake the sleeping woman in his bed.

" _Yes, she would call at her pit stops and phone the house. She'd push a button to let me know it was her. When she got to New Orleans, I asked if she was there, and told her to push once for yes and twice for no,"_ Gran explained.

"Huh," Eric frowned thoughtfully as he took this into consideration, "I only call her to wish her goodnight and tell her I love her. It drives Alcide up the wall."

 _"I think it's sweet. Sookie waits at the phone for your good nights,"_ Gran told him. _"Well, I won't keep you. Thank you again for letting me know that Sookie is safe. Call and tell me when she's leaving on Sunday?"_

"Yes, Gran," Eric agreed easily. "I'll call you as soon as I get back to my room from seeing her off."

" _Thank you. Good night,"_ Gran ended the call and Eric placed his phone back on the cradle.

As he climbed back into bed, Eric placed his hand on Sookie's hip as he contemplated the difference a year would bring. With any luck, this time next year, they would be married and live together off campus. He'd come home to their apartment and be able to tell her about his day and read all about hers. _Could she be able to speak it to me by then?_ He wondered with tentative optimism.

He hoped that therapy would help her. He prayed that it could make a difference. Even if the only time he heard her voice was while she slept, he welcomed the thought that someone could help her with her self-confidence. He hoped that someone could get it through her head that she wasn't a burden or, especially, that she wasn't responsible for the deaths of her parents. _If only she'd believe the people who love her._

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Fifteen: Dreams of the Future**

Eric awoke slowly with a moan. He'd been having the best dream about Sookie being in bed with him. Even as the fantasy slipped away, Eric could still feel her lips wrapped around his cock. When he realized he was fully awake and could _still_ feel her, Eric's eyes snapped open, and he looked down to see his fiancée sucking on him with mischief in her eyes.

"Sookie," Eric groaned as he watched her lips glide over him. His hand reached to tangle in her hair, and he urged her to release him. "Get up here." He sat up and put his arms around her waist as Sookie scooted up his legs. His hands were on her thighs, spreading them until he could easily slip inside her. When he was fully encased, Eric hugged her tightly to his chest. "Best alarm clock in the world," he grunted as his hips undulated beneath her and his hands pushed down on her hips. Sookie whimpered and twisted atop him as their sexes ground together in an effort to be closer, to push deeper.

"Ah! Mmm," Sookie cried as his fingertips left her hip to rub above where they were joined.

As her inner walls began to flex with her orgasm, Eric groaned, " _Goddamnit!_ "His hips bucked feverishly beneath her and Sookie was thrown into bliss as she felt Eric wildly fill her with his cum. "I just… Can't make it through," he panted with small grunts as her pussy squeezed him rhythmically with its aftershocks. "It's a good thing I don't have to pull out," he told her. "You'd _never_ finish during if I couldn't get those last few thrusts in." Sookie smiled and kissed his cheek before seeking out his lips.

Glancing at the clock, Eric saw that it was only 4AM. "If you want to sneak in a shower, now's the time. The night owls are passed out, and the early birds aren't quite awake. We'd only risk running into the insomniacs at this hour."

Sookie smiled and nodded. He'd been somewhat pent up and indeed made a mess out of her.

Sliding out of bed, Eric grabbed his robe to throw at her, and then slipped on a pair of sweatpants to wear to the bathroom. He grabbed his toiletry bag and then ushered his fiancée out the door. When she pointed confusedly at the bathroom sign, Eric laughed.

"Our floor is a co-ed bathroom. Don't worry about it."

Sookie's face slackened uncomfortably at the notion, but he shoved her into the bathroom, and that was the most she protested through the entire experience.

 _Oh, I hate this, oh I hate this,_ Sookie thought miserably as she showered. Even with Eric in the same stall as her, she felt like someone would whip back the curtain at any second and start staring at her. _God, I hate this!_

"Relax," Eric chuckled as he started running his hands over her body. "No one's going to peek on us." At the pitiful expression on her face, he leaned in and gave her a gentle kiss before moving their positions and putting Sookie directly under the spray of the water rather than the two of them standing sideways beneath it. The new arrangement effectively put Eric between herself and the curtain. "There. Now they'll only see _me_ if they peek."

Sookie didn't like that idea either, but it was better than the alternative. However, it turned out not mattering because no one whipped back the curtain at any point during their shower.

"I told you so," Eric laughed as they were toweling off and Sookie was once again in his robe. "It's not as scary as you think it is."

" _I don't like bathing if I can't lock the door,"_ she told him.

"… Even if it were an all girl's bathroom?" Eric asked. Sookie shook her head. "Why?"

" _Girls in gym took pictures of me once,"_ Sookie explained as they went back to his room.

"When did that happen!?" Eric demanded.

" _Freshman year."_

"What'd the school do?" Eric pressed as they arrived back in his room.

Sookie took up his notebook and wrote out, _"The gym teacher walked in, took the camera and destroyed the film. She said 'disrespecting bathroom rules like that made the girls a bunch of perverts, and she was disgusted by them.'"_

Eric stared, "That's it? No one was expelled or suspended?" Sookie shook her head. "What the fuck!?"

 _"The entire freshman girl's class would have been expelled except for me if they'd done something like that. There are only 53 people in the class of '99. 28 of them are girls."_

"Jesus, I forget how small Bon Temps is," Eric remembered the population of the entire town hadn't even toppled 3,000 yet. "You only have the one gym class for the Freshman." Sookie nodded. "Would you have done anything if the teacher hadn't stepped in?" Eric wondered. When Sookie shrugged, Eric sighed. Pulling her into his arms, he whispered, "One day, Sookie, you're going to see how amazing you really are, and I hope you look back on all those memories and realize you didn't deserve to endure any of it."

It was in that moment that Eric understood why Sookie could be bullied so harshly and no action be taken by the faculty. The school had unwittingly set a precedent. As long as enough students could be held accountable, the system would do nothing. After all, they couldn't expel half of an entire graduating class, could they?

Sookie accepted her fiancé's embrace, and as she was wrapped up in his warmth, she had to wonder if he would love her if she were the type of person to make waves. Did Eric love her because he felt she needed to be looked after? _No_ , she denied the thought as quickly as it came. She knew his love wasn't so superficial. Even if it had initially attracted him to her, it would no longer be his primary interest. Regardless, she knew that part of his love for her had to do with endurance he wished she didn't exercise. She knew this because how often he brought it up. There was admiration as well as regret when he witnessed her persisting nature. That admiration is what made her first fall for him. He didn't look at her as someone who escaped reality but pushed continuously against it. _Yes,_ she admitted to herself, _I gave up on a lot of things for myself, but I never denied the life I was living._

That was something Sookie always remembered was how she lived. Even if her goals were as short-term as getting out of high school as quick as she could, she'd still worked her ass off to do it.

The pair were silent for the remainder of their time in the dorm that morning. Eric and Sookie quickly dressed and left to explore the real world of New Orleans. It was still early, but they found a little bakery that did donuts and cinnamon rolls that they inhaled for breakfast.

"Wow, these are amazing," Eric moaned as he took another bite. Sookie tentatively took a bite of her cinnamon roll and openly stared as if she were in shock. "What's wrong?"

 _"It's delicious,"_ Sookie told him.

"Then why are you acting like it just bit you?" he laughed at her expression.

Unable to respond, Sookie took another bite, and then another and another. When the entirety of her breakfast was gone, she stared at her empty plate contemplatively. _I didn't realize there was this big of a gap between my baking and a professional baker,_ Sookie realized. As per her agreement with Gran buying Eric's guitar for his graduation gift, Sookie had done all of the baking for the church bake sales and pancake breakfasts. The items Sookie made were always the first ones gone. For a few days, she got to hear about how Adele Stackhouse was the best baker in all of Renard Parish because no one knew Sookie was the actual creator.

" _They bake much better than me,"_ Sookie confessed to Eric.

"Sookie, they're professionals,"Eric pointed out as he devoured another pastry.

 _"I guess I didn't realize there was this big of a gap in my skills,"_ Sookie told him, and her expression about broke his heart.

Eric quickly stood up and headed for the register. "Excuse me," he greeted warmly, "my fiancée is an aspiring baker, and she really loved the food here."

The clerk seemed confused why the man was saying this instead of the woman who came in with him, but she smiled and thanked him. "We're always happy to hear that from our customers! It's still early for the breakfast rush. If you put on a hairnet, you can go back and talk to my sister while she works."

"Oh, this is family run?" Eric asked.

The woman nodded, "Yeah, my sister does most of the baking. She has a couple assistants, but it's mostly all her. I run the actual business part. I guess you could say that we're well matched."

"I'll ask her if she wants to go into the back. Thank you!" Eric smiled as he returned back to their table. Sookie stared at him, having heard the exchange. "What do you say? Want to talk with a professional baker?"

Nodding hesitantly, Sookie took her fiancé's hand and let him tug her toward the counter. The clerk handed them each a hairnet, and Sookie smiled amusedly at Eric in a hairnet. When they entered the kitchen, Sookie floated through the strong aroma of baking loaves of bread and sweets.

"Hi there," Eric waved, "your sister said we could come back here and meet you."

A young woman with brown hair spun into a tight bun looked over to see them. "Good morning! Did you have a good breakfast?"

"We did, thanks to you," Eric replied. "My fiancée really enjoyed it. She's very proud of her own baking skills, and I thought meeting someone who owns their own bakery might be inspiring to her."

"Oh, well," The woman laughed nervously. "It's always been my passion," she explained as she took a tray of bread dough from the oven, cut quick slits in each and threw it back into the heat. She bustled around performing her tasks as she spoke. "I went to pastry school right out of high school and got a job as head baker in a grocery store for a few years. I couldn't stand baking pre-made doughs, though."

Sookie's hands flung out wildly, and Eric smiled as she finally showed some enthusiasm.

"Where did you go to school?" Eric asked.

"LCI, right here in New Orleans," she baker replied. "Is she deaf? Should I face her more?"

Eric shook his head, "No, she just can't speak."

"Oh, okay," the baker shrugged. "I'm glad she understands me easily. I don't know a bit of sign language."

Sookie's hands shot up, and Eric laughed.

"She says that she barely knows any either," Eric told their host. "So, how long is the LCI program?"

The baker shrugged. "Depends on the program. One can be done in a year, or there's the other program can be done in four. I have an associates degree," she explained.

"Well, thank you for your time," Eric smiled as he saw that the woman was becoming increasingly busy as different timers started going off, and the baker began hopping from one station to the next. It definitely looked like she had a system at work.

Sookie waved goodbye as well as they headed out to the shop. The clerk thanked them and said farewell as they left.

"So," Eric looked at his fiancée as he yanked the hairnet off his head, "what do you think about going to school to become a pastry chef?" Sookie thought about this a moment before shrugging. "You're not interested at all?"

" _I don't know if I want to go to school for it,"_ she confessed. _"Is it greedy to want to be a stay at home mom for a career?"_

Eric shook his head, "No, it's not. Especially if you get your way and have five kids to wrangle all day."

" _I still haven't convinced you for more than two babies?"_ Sookie teased.

Eric thought a moment, "I think you've got me up to three." Sookie beamed at her future husband and hugged him around the middle as they walked down the street together. "If that's what you really want, then I'll be all too happy to help you get it, but I don't want you to feel limited."

Sookie stopped and took her notebook from her purse. Eric paused to wait as she wrote out her reply to his statement. _"I don't see being a mother as a limited dream. I want to do all the mom things like school bake sales and being a helper mom. I want you to come home from work to a house that's in order, and a home-cooked meal."_

Eric smiled as he kissed the top of her head. "Putting the kids to bed and then sitting up at the kitchen table going over bills and budgets?" he guessed. Sookie nodded, and Eric pulled her in tight. "If your dreams ever change, just let me know."

Hand in hand, the couple explored the many attractions New Orleans had to offer. Eric bought a disposable camera and made sure to snap plenty of pictures of her, and she did the same so that they would have mementos to carry until they could be together again.

All too quickly the day slipped from their grasps, and they were enjoying a stunning sunset that turned the sky into a red, burning fire. They stood, staring over the Mississippi River and the reflection of the crimson flames above them.

"I don't want you to leave," Eric whispered as the sun sunk lower and lower. "I thought I was handling the distance pretty well, but then when you showed up yesterday… I've missed you, Sookie," he confessed.

Sookie looked at her fiancé as she opened her notebook, _"I've missed you too. I wish I didn't have to leave either, but six months isn't so long. We'll have a long weekend together next month. And then two and a half weeks in the winter. We'll make it. We're both strong."_

Eric laughed at his fiancée's reassurance, "I'm glad you can be so positive about it."

" _All I have to do is remember that I'll be living with you next year, and it makes it much easier to be so positive."_

"Were you still wanting to get married this upcoming summer?" Eric asked. Sookie nodded enthusiastically. "We need to get planning that."

Sookie took the notebook back and quickly wrote, _"We could have it at Gran's if you'd like. I'd really only be inviting Jason, Gran, Hadley and Aunt Linda anyway. Unless you have a lot of people you'd like to invite?"_

Eric snorted, "Not really. If Quinn and I are still friends, I'll probably invite him, but that's the only person I can think of other than Godric and Pam."

" _What about your roommate?"_ Sookie asked.

"Alcide? No, I don't think so. He's nice enough, but I don't really think of him as a friend. Not to mention, his girlfriend is too unpredictable for my liking."

" _How so?"_

Eric became thoughtful, "Debbie buys things, big things, on a whim. She bought a car three weeks into the school year."

" _You bought a car the same day we met,"_ Sookie pointed out.

Eric pouted, "We planned for that, it wasn't impulsive. I'd driven down in Godric's Jeep from New York. When he and Pam arrived, Godric was going to need it, so we'd decided to get me a car too."

" _I was just teasing,"_ Sookie smiled and gave him a sympathetic hug for good measure.

Eric draped his arm over her shoulder as she hugged him and kissed the top of her head. "When are you leaving tomorrow?"

" _When I wake up,"_ she signed.

Eric held her tighter for a brief moment, "I'll have to keep you up late tonight then, so we sleep in."

Sookie gave his ribs a gentle nudge to chastise his motives, but deep down, she wanted the same exact thing.

{†}

Eric waved goodbye from the sidewalk as his future wife left campus to head home. They'd managed to sleep until 9, but it still hadn't been long enough. Both dressed as slowly as possible, hugging, kissing and caressing at every opportunity. Several students witnessed them breaking their own anti-PDA rules on their way to the parking lot, but all those witnesses were in agreement that the exchanges were sweet rather than lewd.

"Your girlfriend is adorable."

Eric nearly jumped out of his skin as he looked down by his shoulder to see Debbie standing beside him. "Thanks," he mumbled after calming down, "but she's not just my girlfriend; she's my fiancée."

"Oh, that's right," Debbie remembered, but he heard a slight sound of annoyance at his correction. "Next time, you should let all of us hang out with her instead of hogging her the whole time."

"She came to see me, not to socialize or make friends," Eric replied as he headed back to the dorm.

"Possessive much?" Debbie grumbled.

"Very much," Eric agreed but left it at that.

Debbie paused a moment before she sighed and apologized. "I didn't mean to sound like a bitch. I just meant that since she'll be moving down here next year, it might be nice to know some people ahead of time. You don't expect to keep her barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, do you?" she teased.

Eric laughed at that. "Actually, the way she talks sometimes, I don't know that she'd mind that arrangement all too much."

"Seriously?" Debbie was surprised.

"Sookie wants children very much," Eric nodded. "I'm not so sure about the barefoot and kitchen part, but if I told her I was ready to start a family right now, she'd chuck her birth control."

"Wow," Debbie followed him back into the dorm, "I don't know that I'm sure if I want kids at all, let alone ready to start _now_! Do you think it's because she can't speak that she doesn't like to socialize?"

Eric glanced at his roommate's girlfriend and laughed, "Sookie's actually very sociable. She's funny and sweet. Like I said, I'm just greedy for her. Next year, I really do plan on the two of us going to parties together and helping her make new friends. It's only difficult for her to make friends when others don't show her the patience to listen. Her personality is beautiful."

"Well, I hope I'm one of the people she gets to know," Debbie commented as they walked further up the stairs. "Maybe she can give me some pointers on getting a ring on my own finger."

Eric didn't reply right away. Up until twenty seconds ago, he didn't really like Debbie all that much, but talking to her about Sookie was slowly warming him up to her. Finally, he comforted her by saying, "He might just be waiting until the two of you are done with college."

"What made you propose so easily?" Debbie pouted.

"I wasn't afraid of people hounding, criticizing and mocking me," Eric grinned. "Not many people can handle the stress of others picking at their relationships. I'm constantly attacked for my commitment to Sookie. It's one of the reasons I'm not big on going to parties. There are always girls trying to sleep with me, or guys trying to convince me to cheat on Sookie because it's, 'what you do in college,'" Eric threw up some air quotes. "I've gone a lot of my life being told what I have to do and who I have to be. Now that I'm free, I choose to do what I want and be who I want without allowing others to sway my decision."

"Why can't Alcide be like that?" Debbie moaned in frustration.

"You realize that you'd probably get the same flack from the girls too, right?" Eric pointed out. "Do you really want to listen to all the girls in your dorm talking shit about how they can't believe you'd settle down with a high school sweetheart and not play the field?"

Debbie frowned as she looked at Eric, "Would it really be like that?"

Eric shrugged, "Maybe. I don't know, I just know how it is for me, and the answer is: yes. It is like that."

"That sucks," Debbie sympathized.

"I suggest you stop worrying about when Alcide plans to propose, and focus on classes and just spending time together. Stay strong through college, and he'll pop the question when he's ready to. I think everyone's a lot harder on Freshman about this stuff than anyone else because we're all still high schoolers in a way. Hopefully the pressuring will go down when we come back next Fall."

"Have you thought that, maybe, going out and partying might help?" Debbie suggested.

"How do you mean?" Eric asked, pausing before his dorm room and looking at his roommate's girlfriend with curiosity.

"Well," Debbie thought aloud, "if they see you being sociable instead of holed up in your room all the time, they wouldn't say that you're letting college pass you by. If they see women hitting on you, and you politely rejecting them instead of regretfully, they might believe Sookie's more than just a high school sweetheart." The girl looked Eric over amusedly, "Or do you doubt you have the control to turn down lay after lay?"

Eric snorted at the challenge, "Are you serious? There's not a single girl on campus that could turn my head."

"Then is Sookie the one who keeps you in on the weekends?" Debbie taunted.

"Of course not. Sookie even told me I should go out more," Eric rolled his eyes as he opened the door to his room. Alcide still wasn't back from wherever it was he had crashed, and Eric felt a little guilty having put his roommate out for a weekend without warning. When he'd told Sookie to give surprise inspections, he had forgotten surprises meant inconveniences for his roommate.

"See?" his new shadow laughed. "Make a point to people! Show them that Eric Northman isn't just blissfully unaware of what's out there, but perfectly happy with what he already has!"

Eric sighed and looked heavenward. _If it will shut you up!_ "Fine. Quinn already demanded I show up at his Frat's party next weekend."

"Excellent! Now get lost," Debbie jerked her thumb toward the hallways. "Alcide will be back soon, and we've got an entire weekend of sex to catch up on because of you!"

With a resigned sigh, Eric grabbed the guitar Sookie gave him for graduation and went on the hunt for a private area to practice. He didn't like people watching him fumble to learn the chords. Rather than walking across campus for privacy, Eric headed further upstairs until he came to the roof access. No one ever came this high up except maintenance, and Eric sat down on a step to balance his guitar on his knee.

The guitar was an excellent opportunity to be by himself without others talking. Telling Debbie that he wasn't bothered by all the gossip surrounding him wasn't necessarily a _lie_ , but it wasn't exactly the truth either. It was frustrating, and he had to bite his tongue often. There was little point in fighting the snide comments and gossip, and far too exhausting for the minuscule gains.

As his fingers clumsily skated across the strings, Eric felt himself become more honest with himself than he'd been with Debbie. The hounding from people who knew nothing about him was easy enough to ignore. They weren't his friends, and their opinions were just as offensive as a pile of dog shit. He had to endure the odor only in proximity to the dump, as long as he didn't step in it, it might as well not exist beyond that brief encounter.

Thankfully, UNO was a large campus, and he wasn't the only Freshman with a high school sweetheart back home or at another school. _Unfortunately_ , when he'd see one of those other lovesick fools cheat on their absent lover, that was more painful and longer lasting than any offhanded comment he endured.

Eric's fingers traveled to the D chord, and he let out a smile as he strummed it. A Mexican kid named Felipe had shown him the simplicity of transitioning the D chord to play 'Free Falling.' It was one of Eric's favorite things to play when he felt like his practicing was going nowhere. At that moment, that simple chord banished more than the doubts of his musical talent. For a second Tom Petty was there reminding him of 'all the good girls at home with broken hearts,' and Eric was comforted to know that Sookie wouldn't be one of them.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Sixteen: Letters From Me to You**

Sookie looked at the last of her fading bruises as she changed clothes after school. Since returning from New Orleans, things had changed dramatically for her. The entire school had seemed to collectively decide to ignore her. Sookie suspected the change in her classmate's aggression toward her was more than likely linked to her brother's sprained wrist.

It had only been three days of being bully-free, but Sookie had been grateful for those three days. The worst of her bruises were still brilliantly discolored, but the majority which had been quite light, to begin with, were finally vanishing rather than being recreated.

Now she would be heading to Shreveport to meet with a psychologist for the first time since shortly after her accident. Gran would be coming as well, but she'd said it was only to drop her off.

Sookie didn't understand why. After all, she'd just driven to and from New Orleans over the weekend, but rather than question it, Sookie merely nodded and changed for her first session. The car ride was quiet which made Sookie more uneasy. Gran usually filled Sookie's silent life with gossip or commentary on her latest book.

When they arrived at the psychologist's office without so much as a word, Gran handed Sookie her notebook and smiled.

"Don't be scared, Sookie," Gran told her. "Just be honest. It's just you and her. No one will see or hear a peep about it."

Taking her book and pen, Sookie nodded slowly before shutting the door and heading to the office. Approaching the brunette receptionist by herself was nerve-wracking. Her fingers fumbled as she opened the notebook to a fresh page, and her ordinarily beautiful penmanship suffered as her hand was unsteady.

" _I'm Sookie,"_ she held the page out for the receptionist to see.

The middle-aged woman glanced up and saw the paper before her. She smiled and nodded. "Hi there, Sookie. I'm Barb, Dr. Broadway's assistant. I'm sure we'll get to know each other well. If you feel more comfortable signing, then go ahead and use that. The doctor and I will both understand you," Barb told her in a reassuring lilt.

Sookie let out a breath she'd been holding as the matronly looking woman seemed to cure a bit of her anxiety. _"Thanks,"_ she gestured in relief. Even though she wasn't perfect at signing, it was a relief for smaller statements or inquiries. Only having Eric to sign with limited her practice and vocabulary, especially now with him away at school.

"If you want to take a seat right there," Barb gestured to a small seating area, "Dr. Broadway will be with you in a few moments."

With less hesitation than when she entered, Sookie took a seat and waited by staring at her notebook. She studied the wiggly lines of _I'm Sookie_ , and began to write it over and over again until the shakiness of her hand vanished. When the swoops of her words smoothed out, and she felt the calm finally extending throughout her body, she felt more prepared for her first session.

"Sookie?" Barb called gently. "Dr. Broadway is ready to see you."

Sookie smiled politely as she rose from her seat and headed for the office. When she entered, a lovely, young woman rose to meet her. Her hair was a brilliant, natural red, and Sookie wondered momentarily if she was old enough to be a doctor.

"Hello, Sookie," Dr. Broadway held out her hand to shake Sookie's. "It's very nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Amelia Broadway." 

" _You too,"_ Sookie replied when she got her hand back.

"I see Barb informed you that signing is understood here," Dr. Broadway smiled.

" _Yeah,"_ Sookie nodded.

"Excellent." Dr. Broadway gestured to the available seats. "Wherever is comfortable for you."

Sookie chose the sofa, leaning into its arm, and perching her notebook upon it. Dr. Broadway settled in a nearby armchair, and Sookie figured it was because she would be able to read Sookie's notes easier from that vantage point.

"So how is your day going?" the psychologist asked.

" _Good,"_ Sookie's hands answered.

Dr. Broadway smiled, "Remember, Sookie, this is a place where nothing you say gets back to anyone. You don't have to be polite or proper, and you don't have to grin and bear a thing."

Sookie looked at her notebook and frowned. The only thing that ruined her day that destroyed _every_ day…

" _I miss my fiancé, Eric."_ She held up her notebook and confessed.

"Long distance relationships are complicated," Dr. Broadway nodded. "But with the circumstances you've grown under, I can tell you're tough enough to handle it."

" _He's tough, too. He and his siblings moved all over the world while he was growing up,"_ Sookie told her.

"I bet he fell pretty hard for you," Dr. Broadway teased.

" _Why do you say that?"_

The older woman shrugged before saying, "When I first saw you, I envisioned homemade apple pies and sweet smiles. What man wouldn't melt for that?"

Sookie blushed before she confessed, _"Eric tries to encourage me to look beyond just being a housewife. When I visited over the weekend, he asked if I might want to go to school to become a pastry chef."_

"Would you?" the doctor asked.

Sookie shook her head before looking back to her notebook, _"I love to bake, but I can't envision it as a career right now. I sort of thought I'd get out of high school as fast as I could, move to Shreveport or somewhere, get a job in a factory or warehouse where I wouldn't have to talk, and just-"_ Sookie stared at the sentence, searching her mind for the verb that eluded her. When no word came, she held the incomplete statement up for the doctor to read.

"That's called existing, Sookie," Dr. Broadway provided. "You seem fixated on getting out of Bon Temps, though. Why is that?"

" _I'd come to visit home,"_ she assured quickly and showed it to the doctor. However, the rest of her statement came soon after. _"Everyone in town talks about me when I come into the stores. The waitresses and stuff talk about me when Eric takes me out in town. Gran stopped even offering to bring me shopping with her after awhile."_

"You want the anonymity of city living?" the doctor asked. Sookie nodded slowly. "Has that want changed at all since getting engaged?" Sookie took another moment before giving a tentative bob of her head. "What do you want now?"

" _Babies,"_ Sookie answered bashfully.

Dr. Broadway smiled, "How many?"

" _At least five,"_ Sookie covered her face with her hands after she replied.

"What about motherhood is most exciting to you?"

Sookie's shy smile faltered, and Amelia was surprised.

" _They will know I love them even if I can't speak,"_ Sookie finally gestured out her feelings. _"They'll always know without words."_ Sookie took up her pen again and continued, _"My mom and dad told us they loved us all the time, but I always felt it even when they weren't saying it. That's why I… Eric hasn't had to hear it once. He knows."_

"But you want him and your babies to hear it, too," Amelia finished gently. Sookie nodded and pushed a tear that trickled down her cheek. As she snuffled back the building congestion in her nose, she saw the doctor nudge a box of tissues at her, but Sookie stubbornly refused to use one. "What happens when you try to tell Eric your feelings?"

Sookie frowned dully as she answered, _"My throat closes, and no breath comes in or out until I stop trying. Then I stop trying, and I can breathe again."_

"I see," Amelia watched Sookie in a manner of consideration rather than observation. Sookie felt like she was being listened too and not studied. It felt much less clinical and scary than when she was a child. In a way, she felt like she was sitting around with Godric. She imagined his curious questions and rapt attention. "Was it always like that when you tried to speak after the accident, or did it feel a little different when you first woke up?"

Thinking back, Sookie tried to remember if her inability to speak had always felt like choking on her own tongue. _No,_ Sookie thought, _I couldn't even move my lips right when I woke up…_ She remembered the words around her, absorbing them, understanding them, but had none of her own. It had been like someone removed the path from her brain to her mouth. In fact, as Sookie recalled, she hadn't even been able to write at first. That had come back about two weeks after waking up. When Sookie tried to explain this to Amelia, the doctor nodded as if she understood something Sookie had spent her entire life trying to fathom.

"Then the thing keeping you from speaking has changed since the beginning, hasn't it?" the doctor asked, and Sookie could only hesitantly agree. _Has the nature of it changed?_

They communicated back and forth about the differences between how she couldn't speak when she first awoke from her coma, and how it felt when she tried to talk now. By the middle of the session, Dr. Broadway seemed far more encouraged about the situation than Sookie felt.

"We're going to work through this together, Sookie," Amelia told her. "We'll celebrate every little victory together."

" _What about when I move to New Orleans next year?"_ Sookie asked.

"Well," Amelia thought for a moment, "I have a colleague down there. Actually, she was more of a mentor than a colleague. Her name is Dr. Octavia Fant, and we both have similar ideas when it comes to our approach to helping others. If you like, I can help you schedule an appointment with her while you're down in New Orleans visiting Eric. You'd have to give me plenty of notice for your trip, though," Amelia told her.

" _I'd really appreciate that,"_ Sookie agreed. Getting to know her future doctor _now_ felt like it would make the transition much easier later.

"All right, try to plan a trip at least six weeks in advance, okay?" Amelia suggested before refocusing their attention to their actual meeting. "So, how do you feel so far about your first session?"

Sookie considered the question before confessing, _"A bit overwhelmed and confused. What does it mean if the cause of my muteness has changed?"_

Amelia smiled. "It means that we might have a real chance at bringing your voice back if we work together. You're not fighting this alone, Sookie. You have your Gran, your brother, Eric, and Pam! Everyone's rooting for you, Sookie. Think of me as your coach, and your family and friends like your fans and teammates. You're the star of the game, and we all want to see you win. But we need to win as a team. That means you can't shoulder everything yourself. Lean on your team. Ask your coach for advice."

" _I've always felt alone in this,"_ Sookie admitted. _"I don't know that I_ know _how to work as a team."_

"Well, unless you were planning on making and raising those five babies you want on your own, you'll have to at least learn how to work with one teammate," Amelia pointed out with a smirk, and Sookie blushed. "Do you think keeping Eric in the loop on your sessions might help you bridge the gap in the experience?"

" _Eric told me he wanted me to share if I was willing to,"_ Sookie wrote slowly as the gravity of his request hit her. _"I just don't want to distract him from his studies."_

"The two of you are planning to get married at the start of the summer, right?" Amelia asked. When Sookie nodded, Dr. Broadway gestured as though she felt that alone should answer Sookie's doubts. "When you're married, there won't be escaping to your own house and hiding. He'll be there when you're overwhelmed and crying. He'll be there when you're sick or just PMSing. When you start having kids, he'll be there through the bloating and vomiting and all that fun stuff. If he wants to be around for all that, don't you think he wants to be a part of this?"

" _When you put it like that, writing about my sessions to him seems almost romantic,"_ Sookie smiled amusedly.

"I think it's obvious that he cares for you and loves you very much," Amelia assured, and Sookie felt a weight lift from her chest.

Her own family had been very positive about her engagement to Eric, but Eric's brother and sister seemed hesitant. Sookie wouldn't go so far as to say they were disapproving, but she definitely felt far less enthusiasm from them. Ever since Pam had told her she was a lesbian and had been attracted to Sookie, things had been different. Sometimes Sookie worried that Pam resented the relationship, and that was painful too.

"Are you okay, Sookie?" Amelia asked as she saw the young woman's eyes grow distant and sad. When Sookie expressed how Godric and especially Pam had reacted to the engagement, Amelia nodded in understanding. "Well, it's certainly a difficult family dynamic. Since I don't know any of them, I can only give general theories about their lack of enthusiasm, but it feels like the issue definitely isn't you."

" _I know,"_ Sookie gestured half-heartedly.

As the session wrapped up, Sookie thanked her new doctor and headed for the waiting room. She thought she should be crying, or feeling something profound. Instead, she felt _simpler_. Dr. Broadway had demystified her condition. She made it feel like she could _fight_. Though they hadn't really talked about a plan of attack, Sookie guessed that Amelia wanted to get to know their opponent a little better. Though it had been described to her like a football game, Sookie saw it as a boxing match in her head. _I guess that makes Eric Adrian…_ Sookie smirked. _I wonder if I'll sound like Rocky when I start talking; like I have a bunch of marbles in my mouth?_

Sookie paused on her way out the door. For the first time in eight years, she had thought of the word 'when' instead of 'if.'

While tears trickled down her face, all she could do was let out short huffs of laughter like sobs as she left the office and stepped out to the street.

{†}

 _Oct. 20_ _th_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _My session went well with Dr. Broadway. We've started by exploring the possibility that anxiety might be playing a role in my speech problem. She suggested trying some anti-anxiety medications and seeing if it helps me overcome my mental block. The problem is, I don't want to be on medication my whole life, and I want to try learning other coping methods instead of resorting to drugs. What do you think?_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Oct. 26_ _th_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _I think what's important is doing what feels right for you. If you want to try getting through this without medication, then I support that decision. I think you should talk more to the doctor about the situation, though. Drugs aren't always permanent solutions. A lot of the time their use is as needed. I think a few sessions more could be useful in making your decision, and that you should discuss your goals with the doctor._

 _Oh, I went to a party at Quinn's frat last weekend. The idiot went back to some girl's dorm room, was too tired to make it back to the house and ended up in my bed with me! Scared the hell out of me waking up to someone in my bed! I couldn't figure out where the hell he came from! I'll kill Alcide for leaving the door unlocked!_

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

 _Oct. 31_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Happy Halloween!_

 _Tell Quinn he'll get a beating from me if he steals my spot in your bed._

 _School's been better. Everyone's been back to ignoring me for a few weeks now, and it's lonely, but it's better than being covered in bruises. I think Jason had something to do with it because when I got home, he had a sprained wrist._

 _I have a countdown board in my room, tearing off days until graduation._

 _Dr. Broadway and I talked some more about the medication thing. She elaborated more on her intentions for using drugs. The doc thinks if I can get to the point where I'm relaxed enough to start talking, I can eventually be weaned off the anti-anxiety meds and not use them at all, or only as needed. She makes it sound like a shortcut. I'm not fond of taking the easy route, but when I mentioned that, she said they aren't always about cutting corners, sometimes they're for reducing strain. She pointed out that if I'm under constant stress about not being able to speak, that it could be making it all even worse._

 _I see her point, but I guess I'm just scared._

 _What are you doing for Halloween?_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Nov. 8_ _th_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Sorry, I'm writing you back so late. This week has been nuts. Debbie and Alcide got into a huge fight, and Alcide's been clinging to me like a lost lamb._

 _Halloween was fun. I went as a Viking (polaroid enclosed) and drank a couple beers with Quinn and Felipe, the guy who's been teaching me the guitar. Felipe's pretty cool. We've been hanging out a lot together._

 _Speaking of counting down days, are you still sure about the specifics of the wedding? Do you still want June in your Gran's house?_

 _Being scared about Dr. Broadway's suggestions is okay. The important thing is to keep talking about it. Tell her you're afraid and why you think you are. Keep working with her! What's important is doing right by yourself, and if the pills help, then just follow the dosage and ride the ride._

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

 _Nov. 15_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Yes, I'm counting down to the wedding too! Already talked to Gran about it, and I want June 7_ _th_ _at her house! In regards to the picture you sent: that is one sexy Viking, and he's all mine!_

 _I've decided to give the Doc's medication suggestions a try. She said finding my right dosage, and stuff is important. Boy, was she right! I took my first pill, and it killed me for the day. Gran had to call me off school. Dr. Broadway was surprised because she gave me a really low dose, to begin with. I was put on an even smaller amount, and this doesn't feel like much of anything. I guess we'll have to wait and see. It's only been a few days, after all._

 _You can tell me all about the fight between Alcide and Debbie this week when you come home for Thanksgiving!_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Nov. 24_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Is it Christmas break yet? I'm glad we got to sneak back to my house while everyone was at yours. I really wanted to show you how thankful I am to have you in my life. You really surprised me, too! That 'mmm' sound you can make when you feel like it is so expressive! I can hear the 'yes' and 'no' and 'huh?' I was most thankful for that. I liked the other sounds I got out of you later, but the 'mmm' was the best of our lives so far!_

 _Alcide and Debbie still aren't talking. I'm a little worried about it, actually. I figured they'd have things patched up when they got back from Thanksgiving, but they seem worse than ever._

 _I was thinking on my drive home about our wedding. It was good to talk about what we wanted to do while everyone was together visiting, but you and I haven't discussed our honeymoon at all. We'll have most of the summer to do something. Any suggestions? I have a couple things on my mind, but what do you think?_

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

 _Nov. 30_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _I wish it were Christmas already too! I hope Debbie and Alcide can bring it back together, but the most I can do is keep them in my prayers. It's not our business to butt in unless they ask, I suppose._

 _As for our honeymoon, we could go camping if you'd like. We could drive up north, and that would definitely be just us! Maybe we can find a nice hotel for a day or two and do the pampering thing, but I don't know. That's what came to mind for me. I guess people usually go somewhere exotic or sophisticated for their honeymoon._

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Dec. 3_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _What about England?_

 _Love,_

 _Eric_

 _Dec. 7_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Is everything okay? I know school is getting busy right now, but only one sentence in your last letter? And England? Where did that come from all the sudden? Are you alright? I know with everything I've had going on, you've put so much focus and attention on helping me through therapy and making choices about medications and other stuff. I just hope I haven't been neglecting you in the process. Please, don't be so worried about me that you feel you can't open up and let me shoulder some of your problems, too. Knowing I'm not the only one going through all of this is a relief, not a burden._

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Dec. 9_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Yes, it's partly that I'm getting ready for finals. I am busy, and my letters will be shorter. It's also that, the longer I'm here, the more I realize I miss more than just you. I'm used to moving around and having to make new friends. It's nothing new for me having to adapt to a new place, but I guess it's finally hitting me that I'm not used to doing any of that alone. I call either Pam or Godric plenty, but I always wish it was more. Realizing that they're the ones who made me strong or resilient enough to handle change is worrisome. I always thought I was strong. Now I just feel homesick all the time._

 _Don't get me wrong, I'm having fun and making plenty of friends, but I guess I was surprised to find out things were only so easy growing up because Pam and Godric were there. Next year will be a lot easier with you here._

 _As for England, I've been looking into taking a summer semester abroad. I know it sounds selfish, but I could get some more credits completed over the summer, and work on finishing my degree a year earlier._

 _Love,_

 _Eric_

 _Dec. 11_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _We all miss you too, and there's nothing weak about that. I've never felt stronger than when I became a part of all of your lives. Being away from you hurts, and I know next year, when we're living together in New Orleans, a part of me will feel lost and a little lonely not having Gran nearby. Regardless, I won't feel guilty for that longing, and I won't feel weak for feeling that way._

 _If you want to go to England and earn some extra credits over the summer, I'm excited to go with you. What's the rush to finish your degree though?_

 _Oh! By the way, I can make 'oooo' and 'ah' sounds on purpose. I'm ready for The Fourth of July!_

 _I'm counting down the days until winter break! I miss you so much! All I feel that I do anymore is count down for one thing or another involving you!_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Dec. 17_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Here's hoping I get home to you before this letter does! I'm looking forward to a few weeks of being with the family. Not only does this break mean that we_ finally _get to spend some quality time together, but it also means that there are only four more months until we can start bringing our lives together._

 _Things seem to be leveling back out between Alcide and Debbie. Their relationship is a lot more complicated than I realized, that's for sure. As long as they leave me out of it, though, that's their business. Alcide told me he plans to pop the question when they go home for Christmas break. I was a bit surprised, I thought he'd wait until next year, but I guess Debbie is putting pressure on him even though I suggested that she shouldn't. That's Debbie, though, she asks your advice and then goes and does exactly what she was going to do before asking._

 _Quinn is already getting bored with all the partying. He's gotten stuck with doing all the planning and prep work for the frat parties, and I think it's a good thing he shaves his head because the way his Brothers throw kinks into his plans would make him rip out his hair. He likes to pretend he's loose and easy-going, but he's just as bad as me when it comes to planning._

 _Let's talk about England when I come home._

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

{†}

Sookie bounced impatiently on the balls of her feet. The plaguing anticipation that had built during the exchanges of their letters was about to lift at long last. Now she just had to wait a few more minutes for her fiancé to exit his flight's gate, and then she could wrap herself around him for the next two weeks.

Finally, she saw a gleam of blond hair above all the others who filed through the exit, and her hands raised eagerly to flag Eric down.

"Eric!" Pam called beside Sookie and raised her own hand in a more dignified greeting.

"Hey, Pam," Eric smiled as he spotted his sister, brother, and fiancée all waiting to greet him. "Godric, I thought you were just going to pick me up after class?"

Before the older brother could reply, Eric had wrapped him up in a hug that he dragged his sister into as well.

"Whoa," Pam stumbled in her heels as she was unceremoniously pulled from her center. "What's this about?"

"I've missed you," Eric whispered and opened his eyes to see Sookie smiling at him reassuringly. Her sincere expression made him strong enough to hold the embrace with his siblings a little bit longer.

"We've missed you too," Godric murmured back. The flitter of concern could be distinguished, but no one in the group openly acknowledged it.

Breaking away from the embrace, Eric cleared his throat as if to break the atmosphere and bring a more light-hearted tone instead. "Anything new happening since Thanksgiving?"

Together, everyone headed toward the parking lot since Eric had a tendency to travel with no more than his single carry-on.

"It's Bon Temps," Pam replied dryly. "Nothing is happening. Although, I'm happy to report that your little bride remains unblemished."

Sookie rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the small smile on her lips when Eric beamed happily. "I'm glad to hear it. Stackhouse has been throwing his weight around?"

"I wouldn't be surprised," Pam nodded.

Eric's arm that was draped over Sookie's shoulder pulled her a bit tighter against his side. No one mentioned the bullying beyond that brief exchange, but Sookie knew that her future husband was relieved to see that she was still safe.

The car ride back to Rosenfont Hall was filled with laughter and playful jibes. Sookie kept her head leaned happily against Eric's chest, and she couldn't wait to tell him about his Christmas present. 

When they arrived at the old plantation, Sookie followed Eric into the house and up to his bedroom.

"I'm glad you're not just going straight home," Eric commented as he pushed his door open. When Sookie's grin widened, Eric frowned and looked into his room. There was a bulging duffle bag sitting on the floor next to his bed. "What's that?"

" _Your Christmas present,"_ Sookie responded.

Dropping his bag on the floor, Eric went to inspect the duffle. He was further confused to find that it contained clothing that was definitely his fiancée's. "I don't get it," he confessed.

" _Gran said I could stay here for Christmas vacation,"_ Sookie explained, making Eric jump to his feet.

"Are you serious?!" he asked excitedly as he lunged and captured Sookie once more in his arms.

"Ah!" Sookie nodded, and Eric hugged her even tighter.

"I love you so much. I love you," Eric mumbled as he finally heard a conscious sound out of Sookie's mouth. When his mouth sought hers and their kisses intensified, Sookie was the one who pulled away and urged to be set back on her own feet. "What's wrong?"

Sookie took a step away and sat on the bed. _"Can we talk about England first?"_

"It's pretty simple," Eric replied as he sat beside her. "I want to take a summer semester, but I still want to give you a honeymoon. We could go a few days earlier than the program starts and have some fun, and then stay together for my semester."

" _But why do you want to take summer courses. You know it won't get you your inheritance any sooner,"_ Sookie reminded him.

"No, it won't," Eric agreed, "but it _will_ get you pregnant sooner."

Sookie's jaw slackened at his point. _"Are you serious?"_

"Yes," Eric smiled.

" _But you said you were still scared about becoming a father,"_ Sookie floundered briefly. As ecstatic as she was, she couldn't help but worry that Eric was rushing himself.

"I don't think I'll ever not be scared about becoming my father," Eric confessed. "I don't know if that fear will ever leave me, but I do know that I want to start a family with you. I know that you won't let me do a bad job."

" _I won't,"_ Sookie assured him. _"I won't have to stop you from messing up. You'll be a great dad."_

"I love you, Sookie." With that, Eric layered himself over his fiancée. "Does that mean we're going to England?"

"Ah!" She nodded and wrapped her arms around Eric's neck. It was time to start celebrating winter break!

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Seventeen: Golden Winged Ship**

 _Jan. 12_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Watching you leave about ripped out my heart. I don't know how much more of this I can stand. I keep telling myself it's almost over, but it doesn't take the ache away. Once again, I have no classes with Pam, and so we only see each other at lunch._

 _I met Dr. Fant, the therapist Dr. Broadway recommended to me for when I move to New Orleans. She was up here visiting Dr. Broadway, and I was invited to come to meet her as well. Dr. Fant seems nice. She's older, probably in her late fifties? I don't know for sure, and it seemed rude to ask. Dr. Fant seems encouraged by my voluntary noises and the fact that I can make multiple vowel sounds. I wondered why I couldn't manage to form any real words even though I could make sounds. Dr. Fant and Dr. Broadway both seem to think it's because I still have anxiety over speaking, and once I've been on my medication a while longer, I could see more promising results. They said it can take a while for the drug to build up in my system and show its real potential. Dr. Broadway reminded me that I need to celebrate and appreciate all the little things as well as the big things. She said being able to make several distinct sounds is a_ huge _deal, but it still seems like my real goal is the moon's distance away._

 _Four more months until I have you back and never have to let go again._

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Jan. 17_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _Dr. Broadway is right, this_ is _a huge step forward in the right direction. I can't say how much it meant to hear you being able to participate in the conversations we have. It may seem like nothing to you, but you express so much in the sounds that you make. Approval, hesitation, joy, displeasure, annoyance… Even with the limits you have, you push them and stretch them to fit your needs the best you can. You're absolutely amazing, and I'm the luckiest bastard in the world to have such an enduring woman in my life._

 _By the way, I've been looking at some apartment complexes down here, and I think we should come to New Orleans on our way back from England. It would be better to try and snag a place up during what's left of the summer before the college students start coming back. Of course, there's still the option of the family dorms on campus, but I haven't heard great things about them. Also, with my monthly stipend, it feels unfair to take a housing possibility away from someone who really needs it._

 _Do you know if you'd be able to make another trip down here?_

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

 _Jan. 23_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _I was thinking about coming to New Orleans instead of going to Prom, but that would be the earliest I can make it down. Gran's car is in the shop after a run in with a deer, so Jason's the one stuck shuttling everyone everywhere. Godric's been a big help too. He drove us all to church last week._

 _With us spending the summer in England for your semester abroad, I guess we could just catch a plane to New Orleans instead of Shreveport. So whenever it is we get in, we can go apartment hunting. I agree that we shouldn't take up room in family housing if we can afford to live off campus. Also, if I can find a job down there, it will supplement the stipend you get from your mother's estate. We'll need to sit down and talk about our monthly budgets very seriously before we start apartment hunting. Maybe we can do that during your Spring Break._

 _Everything's pretty much ready to go for the wedding. The fact we're keeping it so small and casual is is probably why! It helps that we've only got my brother, grandmother, aunt and cousin, and your brother and sister attending. Unless you've thought of anyone else, you'd like to invite?_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Jan. 31_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _I've been thinking about inviting our mom's lawyer. We've known him all our lives, and he's going to have to come down anyway to sign some legal crap. He really_ is _like an uncle to me, Godric and Pam. His name's Bobby, and I'd really like for you to meet him._

 _By the way, I'm getting pretty good at guitar! My chord transitioning is getting really smooth now, and Felipe's been teaching me some easy songs. There's the unfortunate side effect of people actually finding me and watching me play now that I'm getting good, though. I hate when people are watching me in my 'learning phase', they're always too encouraging or too easily impressed. It gives me a false sense of accomplishment._

 _Also, yesterday I was officially approved for my summer program! We'll be in Sussex!_

 _Love always,_

 _Eric_

 _Feb. 5_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Sussex? I'll have to make a visit to the library and start reading about the area. Also, don't forget to find out what we'll have to do about our lodgings since your_ wife _will be coming abroad with you. If they have their own dormitories for the summer semester, we might be forced to find our own place off campus, and that probably won't be included in the tuition._

 _As for Bobby, if you want to invite him, why not just ask? I'm perfectly happy about it!_

 _I can't wait to hear you play! You're so mean for not bringing your guitar home for winter break!_

 _Dr. Broadway brought a speech therapist in on our last session. He won't be_ my _speech therapist, but all we did was talk about what speech therapy would be like when I finally start. Since I'm still not getting any real words out, Dr. Broadway thinks it's too premature to begin working with one. I think she doesn't want me to feel too much pressure about it. I agree, but it was a little disheartening to hear my therapist say I'm not there yet._

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

 _Feb. 9_

 _Dear Sookie,_

 _I think the thing you should be looking at is that the doctor thinks you're getting close to a big leap forward. Why else would she start preparing you for the next step if she didn't sense something on the horizon? Don't be disheartened, be_ excited _! You've come so far, Sookie. I still remember that time at Six Flags, and you made one of your involuntary sounds that we all thought was your first real word. We all thought you'd finally managed to make an affirmative noise, but it was just perfect timing for one of those surprised sounds you used to make. Now you can make sounds that express your intent. I can hear you say 'yes' or 'no'. I can hear the question in your 'mmm's. You've done all of this in less than a year, and that's huge! Don't doubt or question how far you've come. If you do, I'll be right here to remind you how amazing you are!_

 _I love you,_

 _Eric_

 _Feb. 13_

 _Dear Eric,_

 _Happy (almost) Valentine's Day! I wish you were here. Thank you so much for your encouragement in the last letter. I didn't see any of it like that, and you really helped me understand the truth. I told Dr. Broadway about how the last session really made me feel, and about your interpretation of it. She said you were spot on, and that she's grateful to you as well. I guess she thought her and I were at a point in our relationship that I'd have a more positive view of her intentions. I feel sorry that she believes I think so little of her. I think very highly of her, and I told her that I apologize for making her think otherwise. I told her it's me, not her, and she just laughed._

 _Did I tell you? Pam wants to sew my wedding dress! Since we're doing such a small, informal ceremony, I wanted a short wedding dress. I want it to feel like a sundress instead of a gown. Pam showed me a sketch of what she had in mind, and I'm really excited about it! Don't try and sneak a peek at it when you come home for Spring Break, though!_

 _Yours always,_

 _Sookie_

{†}

Sookie dropped her most recent letter to Eric in the mailbox before heading up the road. Tomorrow was Valentine's Day, and she couldn't help but wish she had planned well enough to leave for New Orleans for the weekend. Instead, she planned to call Eric in his dorm tomorrow morning to at least hear his voice.

Walking toward the bus stop, Sookie was amused to pass Rosenfont Hall and not see Pam. Ever since Godric had taken her car away after her third speeding ticket since the fall, the two of them had ridden the bus together. Sookie was used to Pam running late, but she was getting nervous because she could see Bill coming up the road now. Pam _never_ risked leaving Sookie alone with Bill.

"Sookie!" the girl looked back again to see Godric rolling up the road behind her. "Pam's feeling really under the weather today, so I called her off school. Want me to drop you off?"

Grateful to be given an exemption to dealing with Bill this morning, Sookie came across to seat herself in the passenger side of the Jeep. The journey to school was short, and when they passed her bus still making its rounds on the way there, she knew she'd be extremely early. _I wonder if it will be like when Eric and Jason left school,_ Sookie considered as she looked down at the unblemished flesh of her arm. The idea of earning new injuries after so many months incident-free didn't appeal to Sookie.

"Have a good day," Godric told her as he pulled up alongside the school walkway. Sookie gave him a hesitant smile and agreeable 'mmm' before heading toward the school doors.

Most of the morning was the same as it had been for the past few months. Everyone just ignored Sookie. Tara asked for the usual pieces of paper and a pen or pencil. Sookie gave the items without further consideration. Other than that brief interaction, everyone seemed content to leave her be for the day. Until lunch.

Scarfing down her food in hopes of retreating to the library like the days before the Northmans, Sookie barely dared to blink or look away from Bill Compton. She couldn't ignore the shadows under his eyes, or the way his face tensed when one of his friends clapped his shoulder. Sookie could tell that it had been a long night for Bill at the Compton house.

When Bill glanced her way and caught Sookie staring, the young woman quickly grabbed her tray and walked speedily to the garbage can. Glancing back to the jock table several times, Sookie saw a few as well as Bill rise to throw away their own leftovers. Practically throwing the tray to the lunch lady, Sookie scrambled for the door.

Despite the briskness of her step, Sookie couldn't hope to out-lengthen the stride of the taller boys. Even Bill, with his significantly shorter gate, managed to catch up to Sookie before she could reach the library doors.

Facing the wall of muscle, Sookie waited nervously to see how bad her day was about to get.

Bill stepped forward, making Sookie shuffle backward. When there was nowhere left to back-up, Bill's face leaned toward her, stopping mere inches from her own. Involuntarily, Sookie held her breath.

"It's not so much fun being a little, mute bitch when Jason or that carpet muncher isn't here, is it?" Bill asked in such a low growl that Sookie couldn't tell if his friends could hear him. When Sookie's only response was to swallow the lump in her throat, Bill seemed moderately pleased. "And as soon as your rich boy is done slumming it and wore out your cock warmers, I'll be there to throw you back to the bottom of the pile where you belong."

As Bill's hand raised from his side, Sookie wasn't sure what his intentions were. Past experiences warned her a slap was coming, though, and she didn't wait to read his plan. Instead, as Bill raised his hand toward her face, Sookie swung out her fist and struck him with a glancing blow across the throat.

Bill immediately reeled back, clutching at his trachea and gagging. His friends crowded around him, and Sookie escaped to the library while everyone was distracted. For the remainder of the day, she fretted that she'd be turned into the principal's office, and kept her head buried in her books. When the final bell rang without any more attacks, and no summons to the office, Sookie stared in disbelief at her luck.

 _Was he too embarrassed to say a girl had hit him?_ Sookie wondered as she quickly packed up her things and headed for the bus. When she took her seat, Sookie promptly found Bill a few spots behind her. _I'll work on my homework and take my time packing up, so he gets off before me,_ she planned quickly as she began taking out books and papers. She pretended to work on her homework all the way to the stop, and just as expected, Bill got off the bus before she finished packing her materials. _I'll go to Pam's house and hang out till Godric gets home and he'll take me back to the house,_ Sookie calculated further as she scrambled off the bus and onto the dirt road that lead home.

Sookie stared as Bill Compton walked ahead of her up the road. _He's not going to do anything about this morning?_ Sookie wondered in surprise. All the while they walked up the road, Sookie could feel her heart in her throat. Every time she tried to swallow, her heart would race harder, her throat would tighten further. It reminded her of the sensation she experienced when she tried to speak. _Am I_ afraid _to talk?_ Amelia had suggested such a thing before, but it wasn't until this moment that it finally seemed plausible.

Floored by this realization, Sookie's focus drifted from Bill just as the last sounds of the bus that had brought them there faded into the distance. In that moment of distraction, Sookie only had a split second to react as Bill dropped his bag to the ground, spun around and lunged at her.

Without prior expectations to the sudden chase, Sookie turned off the road and dashed into the open field, trying to shake her own book bag from her shoulders as she ran. The straps dug into her arms even as she attempted to run and slip them off, but Bill's clawing hand grabbed the bag, yanked it from her back, and sent Sookie sprawling onto the ground.

"P-p-p-" Sookie's mouth babbled as adrenaline short-circuited her brain. She tried to scramble up, but Bill kicked her in the ribs so hard that she let out a cry that startled both of them. Her shriek only seemed to give Bill a brief pause, because the next thing she knew, his foot was connecting with her body over and over again. Sookie tucked herself into a tight ball, shielding her head and face, but when she was thoroughly bruised and exhausted, Bill turned her onto her back and straddled her chest. His strong arms yanked her weak ones from her face, and he pinned them over her head with one hand while the other repeatedly struck her.

After her face felt like it had turned into a mound of mush, Bill finally stopped hitting her and let out a long, cleansing breath. He stood, towering over her, and stared down at what he had done. She was almost precisely as Bill had envisioned for the past eleven years. There was only _one thing_ he needed.

Walking around her shaking, beaten body, Bill grabbed Sookie by the arm, held it up and placed his foot on her elbow. The scream that erupted from Sookie's mouth when he kicked the joint inward curdled the young man's blood. _Had I screamed like that?_ Bill wondered as he reflected back on the beating he'd received from his father that had lead to Bill's exceptional hatred for Sookie Stackhouse.

With one final look at his work, Bill nodded to himself and left the girl sobbing and broken in the field. Finally, Bill believed he had put someone beneath him. Finally, the son of the town drunk was no longer the weakest. He finally had power over something… But as his house grew closer and thoughts of the beating he had administered filled his head, Bill didn't feel so strong.

{†}

 _Get up, Sookie,_ the girl told herself. _Get up. Get up!_

But her body was resistant. It hurt everywhere, and the world was shifting strangely as her left eye swelled further shut. The pain in her arm was sending nauseating waves through her body as every heartbeat intensified the sensation. She tried rolling onto her left side to rise, but it had sustained the most damage from the kicks. Sookie didn't know how long she lay in the field, but the sun was growing more orange. It was getting late.

 _Your legs are fine,_ Sookie told herself. _Endure it enough to get on your feet,_ she motivated. _Get to Pam._ But Pam made her think of Eric. Thoughts of Eric reminded Sookie how much she missed him and wished she could go to _him_ instead of her best friend.

The heartache was motivating, and Sookie rolled onto her stomach with another whimper of pain. From there she was able to push onto her knees and rise. Her right arm hung awkwardly, and the sight made her vomit, but that only made her back and left side explode with more pain. She moaned as the vomiting ended, and finally stood up. She looked away from her damaged arm and hobbled past her book bag. She stumbled toward the road.

 _I feel away,_ she thought dazedly as her body and mind separated. Her brain was watching, but her body wasn't hers anymore. It moved as it needed, it hurt everywhere, but her brain had stopped listening to the pain. Its objective was to get to safety now, and acknowledge pain later.

 _What's that sound?_ Sookie wondered. Her head lulled, and her eye that hadn't swelled shut was filled with light. Headlights.

"Sookie? SOOKIE!"

 _I know that voice…_ "J-ay," her mouth sounded before her brain could protest.

Jason Stackhouse ran to the girl he barely recognized. When he'd turned down the street and seen the shadowed figure swaying to and fro like a zombie, it had sent a shiver down his spine. Now, looking at his battered sister in the full illumination of his truck's headlights had rage boiling in his stomach.

"Who did this to you?" Jason demanded angrily while his brain scrambled to figure out what the _hell_ to do. "We need to get you home," he finally decided as he reached out to take Sookie's hand and guide her to the cab of his truck.

As her broken arm was tugged, whatever fog in her mind that sheltered her from the pain was blown away, and a scream of pain pierced the growing darkness. Jason flinched, his hands wanting to reflexively cover his ears, but instead, he looked at his sister's arm and realized what had really been done. Her right arm was broken. She couldn't sign. She couldn't write. She couldn't _speak_.

"C'mon, Sook. We need to get you to the hospital," Jason choked as he gestured for her to come to the truck. "Get inside," his voice was a whisper as sobs threatened to overtake him. With gentle, shaking hands, Jason managed to help Sookie get into her seat, and then he ran around to get behind the wheel. He could call the Northmans when he got to the hospital, have Godric pick up Gran and bring her to the ER.

The drive to the hospital was silent, Jason couldn't even bring himself to put on the radio. He just drove, listening to his sister's shallow breathing and occasional whimpers of pain.

"It'll be okay, Sook," Jason encouraged as he pulled into the hospital parking lot. He came around to help Sookie out of the cab, and they walked together into the brightly lit building.

Bon Temps had a small hospital, and there was usually only a few nurses and single doctor on duty when there wasn't a big event going on. Tonight was no exception, and the waiting room was blissfully empty. Even as they walked through the door, the nurse at the check-in was already paging a doctor. It was Dawn Green's father, Elie, that came to greet them.

"What's going on, Margo?" Dr. Green asked as he came out to the waiting room.

Nurse Margo pointed to Jason and Sookie and Dr. Green came rushing over, "What happened to you, Sookie?"

"Someone beat her bad, Doc," Jason told him. "She was wandering in the middle of the road when I found her. I think her arm's broke."

"Goodness," Dr. Green tutted sympathetically. "You better go get your grandmother. I'll start examining your sister."

"I'll call my neighbor to bring her," Jason said. "I don't wanna leave Sook alone too long."

"All right, you go do that," Dr. Green waved dismissively before pulling Sookie away to an examination room.

Jason swallowed hard as he went to the payphone and started making calls.

" _Hello?"_ Pam sounded terrible when she answered the phone. Drowsiness saturated her tone, and congestion distorted it.

"Hey, Pam," Jason tried to keep his voice even as he spoke to his sister's best friend. "Is Godric home yet?"

" _No, but he should be back in half an hour or so,"_ Pam replied dully, her voice definitely let on that she was still feeling under the weather.

Jason didn't want to call back later. "Can you tell him to go pick Gran up and bring her to the ER when he gets home? Sookie's really hurt, and I don't wanna leave her."

" _What the fuck!?"_ Pam yelped. _"I'll go pick her up right now!"_

"Wait-"

Unfortunately, any protest he could have made was cut off as Pam hung up on him, and she presumably left to pick up the older woman. _Oh well_ , he thought as he hung up the phone, put in another quarter and dialed a number he'd only bothered memorizing for emergencies.

" _Herveaux and Northman residence, how may I direct your call?"_ a stranger's voice answered the phone, and Jason assumed it was Eric's roommate.

"Is Eric there?"

" _Nope. He went home to be with his girl for Valentine's Day. Want me to take a message?"_ the roommate asked.

"No." Jason hung up.

{†}

"Well, you came on a good night," Dr. Green tried to joke as he flashed a light in the one eye that wasn't swollen shut. "You're our only guest, which means radiology should be able to see you in no time. Follow my finger with your eye." Sookie did as she was told. When he was done with that, he listened to her lungs, and the touch of the stethoscope against her ribs made Sookie flinch and yelp in pain. Dr. Green moved her gown a bit and looked at the bruising pattern blooming across her ribs. "Sorry about that, Sookie. Take a breath," he listened again, more mindful of his touch. When he determined the girl's lungs were clear, Dr. Green pulled the stethoscope from his ears and looked at Sookie worriedly. "Sookie, I have to ask, are you hurt anywhere else? Do we need to do a rape kit?" he asked gently.

Relief washed over the doctor's face when Sookie shook her head negatively, and he patted Sookie's hand comfortingly.

After the examination, Sookie went to radiology, and it was when she was brought back to the exam room that Nurse Margo popped her head in saying that Mrs. Stackhouse had arrived, and did Sookie want her to come into the exam. Sookie didn't want that at all. She shook her head 'no.' _I'm back to yes and no conversations,_ she realized sadly. _I'm less talkative than a Magic Eight Ball._

As Sookie waited patiently for the results of her x-rays, misery began to fully envelop her. It might have been a good idea to let Gran come in to be with her. The old woman's presence might have absorbed some of the enormity of the day. Her arm was broken. She couldn't sign, and she could barely scrawl a sentence with her left hand; it was so useless to her.

A song came to mind as she sat by herself, lonely, afraid and heartbroken. _'Because she was crippled for life and couldn't speak a sound,'_ Sookie remembered. It was another Jimi Hendrix song. Something about sand castles or something. A song about life not meeting expectations. _Or, maybe it's about life giving you what you yearn for and then slapping it out of your hand,_ Sookie thought pitifully. In six weeks or so, the breaks in her body would be healed, but if the tingling in her hand was any indication, other afflictions could be felt for years to come.

Just as she was about to let herself be consumed by anger and self-pity, Sookie remembered something significant that had happened only an hour or so ago.

 _I said, "J-ay."_

For a brief, beautiful moment, Sookie had actually wanted to say something, and it had started to come out. She had wanted to call to her brother, and his name had actually begun to pour from her lips. It was only the first syllable of his name, but it had been uttered on purpose. That sound had been said with intention. It had been more than just a noise. It had been more than an interpretable answer to a close-ended question. It had been her brother's name.

 _And so castles made of sand slips into the sea. Eventually._

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Eighteen: Words for You**

Gran was raving like a mad woman by the time she got Sookie home and into her own bed.

"-call that school and give them a piece of my mind!" Adele ranted as she fluffed Sookie's pillow for the twentieth time and stormed out to bring her a third cup of tea. "If you wanted to just drop out and get your GED, I wouldn't stop you!" Gran continued shouting even as she came in with another mug of steaming, soothing tea.

At least she had given up on trying to find out who had done the attacking. With all the damage, done to her, it was speculated that more than one person had beat her up, but Sookie had refused to give a single name. A war was waging inside the young woman, and she feared her family would do something stupid and drastic if they heard who had beaten her. _If only Gran hadn't stormed in while the cops were taking pictures of my injuries…_

Jason was leaning against the door, just out of the way of their rampaging grandmother. He had stared at his sister the past forty-five minutes, trying to think of _anyone_ _else_ who could have done this to her, but his memory was too good. Busted ribs, broken arm, and a face so bruised it was hardly a face anymore…

Pushing away from the wall, Jason left the house and stomped through the valley that divided the two hills that were the pedestals of the Stackhouse and Compton homes. He climbed the crest his best friend since diapers lived atop of, and he rang the bell hoping to find Bill's hands unblemished.

Old Mr. Compton answered, already reeking of beer, his breath capable of stripping wallpaper.

"Whaya want?" Robert demanded.

"Is Bill here?" Jason asked, unfazed by the drunkard.

"What's up, Jason?" Bill's voice came uneasily from behind his father, and Mr. Compton turned to sneer at his son. When Bill came to meet Jason on the porch, Robert slammed the door behind him, grumbling all the way back to the living room. "Hey," Bill's voice was subdued.

Jason didn't say anything at first. Bill's hands were in his pockets, and the friend was working up the nerve to let accusations fly. Instead, however, Jason let out a sob he'd been holding in the last few hours since finding his sister wandering in the darkness.

"Bill," Jason choked, making his friend look up in surprise, "someone beat my sister. They beat her up so bad! She won't tell anyone who did it to her. Even while the cops were taking pictures of all the bruises! I don't know if it's 'cause she's scared, or…" Jason snorted back on the snot building up in his nose. He just wanted a few more minutes with his best friend. Jason just wanted a few more seconds where Bill was the person Jason could turn to. Knowing that the guy he trusted and thought of like a brother had been the one to bring this pain was almost as devastating as seeing his sister bruised and broken.

"It was me," Bill whispered as Jason's sobs tugged at what was left of his dying pride.

"I know," Jason sobbed harder, only moderately relieved that his friend had confessed. "Which means, not only did I have to take my sister to the hospital, but I have to lose my brother, too. I lost my _brother_ over a decade's old grudge you asshole!" Jason swung out his arm and punched his best friend in the face. "Was it worth it? Was getting back at a five-year-old girl _worth_ losing your best friend?" Bill fell to the ground and stared up at Jason in surprise as his chest was quickly straddled and more blows rained down on him. "Did you think I wouldn't see all that hurt, all them breaks and not think of _you_?! I was finally learning some signs, and now Sook can't sign!" Jason howled as he remembered her struggle to scrawl with her left hand. Since it was quickly fatigued, her statements were as short as the time before the Northmans. Taken over by grief, Jason stopped his assault and just continued to loom over Bill. "She can't _write_ neither, you asshole! You took what was left of her fucking voice!"

The brother rolled away to sit on the cold grass, holding his head in his hands as he sobbed over everything he'd lost that day. Distantly, a part of him knew that Sookie had lost far more, but at that moment he could overlook that and just weep. Eventually, Jason stood up and pushed away his tears.

"I don't know why Sookie hasn't sold you out, but," Jason glanced down to watch Bill wipe away the blood from his lip, "this time, though, you'd deserve to be told on."

Bill watched as his best friend, his brother, turned away from him and started heading back to his own house. When he was a few yards away, Bill felt his hopes rise because Jason had stopped and turned to look back.

"Hey, Bill?" Jason called.

"Yeah?" Bill replied hesitantly.

"Congratulations on becoming your father."

Bill felt his world shatter at Jason's words.

{†}

As a friendship was falling apart at the Compton house, Eric Northman was arriving at the Stackhouse farm. Godric hadn't even put the car in park when Eric lunged out of the car and stormed into the house. The younger brother hadn't been in his own home yet when his sister had run out to tell him that Sookie had been beaten black and blue. Eric had dropped his book bag on the driveway and jumped back in the car with Godric.

Eric ran to his fiancée's room, passing Gran in the hallway. She gave him a sympathetic look and moved aside to let him pass. When he entered Sookie's bedroom, Eric tried not to look at her immediately but instead crawled into bed with her. Tucking his head into her shoulder, Eric closed his eyes and tried to think of _something_ to say. Instead, he let out a groan and listened to Godric come in and start talking to Adele. Although he could distinguish the sounds of their voices, their words evaded him.

Sookie turned her head to look at Eric. His eyes were squeezed shut so tight it was almost comical. He reminded her of a child trying to fall asleep on Christmas Eve. She thought about speaking, just one little sound. One little noise beyond an 'mmm' would make him feel so much better. _Will you cooperate a bit, Brain?_ She wondered, not feeling the speeding of her heart at the idea of speaking. Sookie had avoided speaking since the inadvertent, "Ja-y," from earlier. Part of her was worried it _had_ been an involuntary sound. Another part of her wanted Eric to be the first one to hear her speak.

"H-i," came the softest, most gravely sound from Sookie's mouth.

"Hi," Eric choked back before looking up with shock. "Sookie! Did you say 'hi'!?"

"Mmm," she smiled just enough not to split her lip back open.

"When? How? Wh-" Sookie placed a finger over his lips to quiet him a moment. The word had come so easily. It felt raw and a little uncomfortable to speak, but it wasn't _hard_. Eric looked to see her awkward posture as her right arm was in a cast and wrapped to her chest. Somehow, she still managed to wiggle her left arm free to shush him.

Sookie's finger left his mouth to touch his chin, and Eric felt his eyes being drawn up to meet hers. He stared at his fiancée's tightened face. She looked like she was trying to work her mouth free of some sort of glue.

Finally, after a moment, her mouth opened and, "I love you," tumbled from her lips to speak the sentence they had waited the past year to exchange.

"I love you, _too_ ," Eric gasped as they stared at one another in disbelief. Despite her bruised and swollen face, Eric could see Sookie's disbelief at managing to speak her first sentence. To look away from her tears and offer a moment for both of them to take in this milestone, Eric leaned in and gently kissed her. Their lips pressed together until they were interrupted.

"Sookie," Gran intruded gently, "I brought you some soup." The old woman quickly realized that she had impressed upon a rather significant moment, and she proceeded to silently put the tray and bowl on Sookie's dresser. Without another word, Adele left the room.

"Were those your first words?" Eric asked softly as they lay in bed, back in their sphere of privacy.

"Mmm," Sookie nodded. Her brain was still trying to process, accept and enjoy the hurdle she had finally cleared. It hadn't sounded as garbled as she'd expected. Breathy. Strained. But definitely clear. In a way, Sookie wouldn't be surprised if she found talking to be physically or even emotionally exhausting, but at that moment, she could only let silent, happy tears trail down her cheeks.

"Does this mean you'll finally start signing your letters with love?" Eric asked hopefully. When Sookie pointed at her busted arm, Eric frowned. "I don't mind if your letters are shorter and look like a five-year-old wrote them. As long as they end with 'Love, Sookie,' I'll be happy."

With another approving, "Mmm," Sookie nuzzled her forehead against Eric's crown.

"It's weird with your head higher than mine," Eric commented as he began to gently adjust them so Sookie's head could rest against his chest. The natural formation eased some of his anxiety. "Will you tell me who did this to you?"

Sookie pulled away and studied Eric's face cautiously. Eric stared right back, waiting for her reply. "Only if you pro-omise not to do anythi-ing about it," Sookie forced out the longer statement.

"How can you expect me to promise that?!" he demanded in disbelief.

"It wo-on't ha-appen again,"Sookie told him.

"How can you know that?" Eric asked sharply but immediately regretted it. Sookie looked exhausted, and the extra strain of speaking couldn't be making it any easier. Regardless, he almost felt himself drawing her out. He almost wanted to fight about it just to keep listening to her breathy voice.

"I just do," she responded patiently. "Do you pro-omise?" Eric shook his head, trying to convey that he _couldn't_ promise that. "Then I ha-ave to pro-otect you." She would have given anything to be able to go turn Bill into the police that very second, but she knew Eric would find a way to get his hands on him first.

Eric took a deep, calming breath, "Okay. You're right, I can't handle it right now. I'd go and beat them all bloody once you told me." Even though Eric had his suspicions, he also had his doubts that one person could have done this. He couldn't imagine one person could inflict this much damage before they realized what they were doing. _Who could possibly hate Sookie that much?_ It made far more sense that multiple people had attacked and done separate damages simultaneously before realizing they'd gone far beyond their intentions. At least, that's what Eric wanted to believe.

Sookie flinched when she felt Eric's lips touch gently against one of her bruises. When Eric pulled away guiltily, she gave him a reassuring smile.

"Did that hurt?" he asked sadly. Sookie shook her head. "Are you sure?" She nodded and with an even gentler touch, his lips grazed the bruised landmarks of her face. Her temple, cheekbone, jaw, and chin all received a remedying kiss that made Sookie smile appreciatively. When the exposed injuries were all kissed, Sookie smiled up at him.

"Why are you here?" she asked suddenly, wondering how he could have arrived so quickly even if Jason had called Eric from the hospital.

"I was already on my way up for Valentine's Day," Eric explained. "I bought the tickets in December for a round trip and wanted to surprise you. Godric had class today, so he picked me up at the airport."

Sookie's mouth tugged into another tentative smile, "Love you," she said with such effortlessness now that it made Eric's heart pound.

"I love you too," Eric assured while basking in this new experience. Today was the first day someone other than his family had told him that they loved him. He couldn't bring himself to say that to Sookie, though. She'd feel guilty for not saying or writing it sooner. It wouldn't matter to her that he felt this moment was well worth waiting for, and that it brought a lightness to an otherwise grim day. "I can't wait until I get to hear you say 'I do.' It can't come soon enough."

Sookie reached for the front of Eric's shirt. Without another word, she leaned in to capture his lips in another kiss. He let her control the pressure and intensity, wanting her to lead and keep from injuring herself further. When she tried to rake her nails under his shirt, however, he pulled away.

"Sookie, are you actually in the mood for sex, or are you revving me up because you think I expect it?" Eric asked, holding her wrist delicately.

"Missed you," she told him softly, and he could hear the exhaustion and strain in her voice. She was at the end of her strength.

"You missed me?" he asked, and she nodded. "I miss you too, but you're hurt all over the place. I can see the bruises, and I know your arm is broken but is there anything else?"

Sookie let out a frustrated sigh and softly muttered, "Three cra-acked ribs and a modera-ate concu-ussion."

"Yeah, we're definitely not fooling around," Eric frowned. "Even if you were somehow in the mood, we're not doing it. Three cracked ribs? What happens when you get excited and start breathing hard?" Sookie hadn't thought of that. "We'll just stay here for the weekend. Right here in bed," Eric told her. "I'll bring you anything you need, and this will be our Valentine's Day. All I want in return is as many 'love yous' as you can give me in the next 48 hours."

Sookie smiled at the conditions of their Valentine's Day weekend. After all, being with him at all was a gift, and as much as she missed the sex, she was grateful to have him there with her. They simply lay in her small bed together, lazily stroking their fingertips over skin and Eric would occasionally tug at the ends of her hair. His tactics were no secret, but Sookie let him lull her into a light doze.

Unfortunately, the reprieve from her exhausting day ended as Jason came into her room followed by Bud Dearborne.

"Sheriff," Eric greeted in surprise.

"Sookie," Jason cleared his throat awkwardly, "I was hoping you'd be up to telling Bud, here, who did that to you. I already told him, but I guess he can't just take my word for it since I wasn't actually there."

The sister gave her brother a hard look and realized he had blood on his recently changed shirt. His hands looked a little swollen too.

"Jason," Sookie hissed, taking both brother and Sheriff by surprise, "what did you _do_?"

"Oh, I just knocked him around a little bit, Bud said no jury would hold me responsible," Jason grinned his rakish, stupid grin that drove his sister up the wall. "But, besides that… When the _fuck_ did you start talking!?"

"I thi-ink it's the concuss-ssion," Sookie admitted.

"So you could lose it again?" Jason asked worriedly.

Sookie shrugged, "I don't think so."

"She's quite the chatterbox," Bud commented.

"Just like the good ol' days," Jason smiled. "Does it hurt?"

"Sore," Sookie replied as she pushed her blanket away and began to slide out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Eric asked worriedly.

"To talk to Bud," Sookie told him. "I don't want to put our hone-eymoon on hold for our first co-onjugal visit."

"Uck," Jason faked gagging as Sookie stepped out of the room with the Sheriff.

"I didn't think she'd actually do it," Eric whispered once Sookie was gone.

"Do what?" Jason asked.

"Give the names of the people who did it," Eric explained.

Jason paused, realizing that Eric had no clue what had happened. "Why's that?"

"She has a _crippling_ guilt complex," Eric pointed out. "Haven't you noticed? She let herself be bullied for years!"

"I guess therapy's done a lot for her," Jason considered. "Or maybe _you_ have."

"That's nice of you to say, but I'm not so sure," Eric frowned.

Jason paused a moment before clearing his throat and confessing, "I'm actually pretty serious. I mean, before you and Pam came into her life, Sookie didn't really say much."

Eric raised his eyebrows, "Up until this evening, your sister hasn't _said_ anything."

"That's not what I mean…" Jason struggled for a moment to explain. "The notebook she carries? Before you guys, the only thing she wrote in it was answers to teacher's questions and the occasional shopping request to Gran. I don't know if she kept diaries or anything, but she never really got anything off her chest."

"She always seemed so engaged," Eric hadn't noticed any lack of socialization from Sookie. She seemed well adept at communicating the way that she did. It had never occurred to Eric that Sookie ever experienced such difficulties holding a conversation.

"Oh, she was always listening," Jason waved off Eric's comment. "She was always _there_ , but she never let anyone in before you and Pam. Even Gran was kept an arm's length away. Maybe it's because she thought she was a burden, but it was probably because I was such a shit to her before. Whatever the reason, though, you guys coming to town and treating her like a normal person really changed her. You helped me forgive her, and you also helped her forgive herself. Not all at once, but a lot."

Eric couldn't help but smile to himself as he listened to Jason sharing these things with him. In a way, Eric hoped that he was good for Sookie. The future husband liked to think that was the truth, but to hear it confirmed was a relief. After years of being unable to connect with a girl, Eric had felt when the moment finally came, he'd be worthless to her. Instead, he found that she complimented his own nature. Where he took action, she tried to keep the peace.

As Eric found himself smiling while thinking of Sookie, her bedroom door began to open, and her face tentatively peeked inside.

"Hey there," Eric's smile didn't falter, but he felt his mood shift from contented to irritated when he was reminded of the brutalization she had endured. That swollen face and single blue eye that could look at him with concern stole most of the tranquility he had found only moments ago.

Sheriff Dearborne followed Sookie back into the room as well to say goodbye, and Eric's annoyance grew when he was not given the names of Sookie's attackers. Instead, the Sheriff tipped his hat and left without a further word.

"Didja do it, Sookie?" Jason asked hopefully, and Eric held his breath.

"Mmm," Sookie nodded and walked gingerly back to bed. Her legs felt weak, and whatever calm she had obtained since the attack, it was seeping away now.

"Are you alright?" Eric asked worriedly as he quickly hopped to her side and helped Sookie recline back onto the bed.

"I think it's all just hi-itting me now," Sookie confessed. Jason had to admit she was doing an excellent job of keeping Eric in the dark. If Dearborne could just get Bill into custody, Jason knew that Eric wouldn't do anything after that. In a way, Bill was better off being caught by himself or the police than being found by Eric. Regardless of what Bill had done, Jason still had a soft spot for his best friend not to murder him. Eric had no such reason to show restraint.

Jason had no doubt in his mind that if given a chance Eric would make sure Bill's body would never be found.

Clearing his throat to get the couple's attention, Jason gave a slight wave, "I'll get out of here and let you guys settle in for the weekend. Sook, just try and stay relaxed. Bud'll take care of everything," the brother assured his sister before leaving the room.

"Sookie?" Eric opened his arms for his future bride to curl against him.

"Hmm?"

"Say it again?" he requested quietly, and his fiancée smiled.

"I love you," she managed to choke one last time before accepting that her throat was well overworked for a single evening.

"I love you, too."

{†}

The following morning, Eric awoke in Sookie's bed, mildly confused by his location until he looked at her bruised and swollen face. Anti-inflammatories and ice had only done so much. Sookie would still be unable to open her left eye. Around the corner of her mouth had a trickle of dry blood painted across the puffy skin from a cut reopening in her sleep.

There was only one memory from last night that kept the rage from boiling over once more inside him, and that was remembering Sookie's declaration of love. Eric wasn't sure why, of all days, he had to hear those words while she was beaten, but he figured it was so he had something to distract him from murder.

"Mo-orning," Sookie choked suddenly, making Eric jump. It would take a while for him to get used to hearing her actual voice. He had still been adjusting to her 'mmm's and 'ahs.'

"Good morning," Eric whispered. "You can still talk!"

"Mmm," she replied.

"Does your throat hurt?" he asked just as softly as before, wanting to maintain the calm atmosphere.

"Mmm," she answered affirmatively.

"Do you want me to make you some tea?" Eric began to sit up but was tugged back against the pillow immediately.

"No mo-ore tea," Sookie told him. She sounded as though she had been standing in a dusty room all day and was still working the debris from her nose and throat.

"Do you want me to get you a pen and paper?" Eric offered despite the desperation he had to keep listening to her strained voice.

"Ah," she shook her head. "Sca-ared to lose it."

"Just don't push too hard, okay?" Eric told her worriedly as he leaned in to give her a gentle kiss.

Sookie nodded in understanding as she took a mental note of how she was feeling. Her ribs ached a little when she breathed in, and her face felt tender when she moved it. Though her arm was broken, it was rather quiet on the pain scale so long as it wasn't touched or jostled. All in all, Sookie determined the most unpleasant injury was her eye. The pressure from the swelling was pushing against her eye, and a constant headache had persisted since the previous night.

As if her grandmother had felt Sookie's discomfort, the old woman knocked on the door and entered with a double serving of breakfast and half a Vicodin.

"Tha-anks," Sookie mumbled as she took the pill first. Before she could chase it with the offered orange juice, though, Gran had dropped the tray all over the couple.

"Gran!" Eric shouted as he tried to stabilize the old woman who had stumbled over. "Are you alright?" he asked as he slipped out of bed, covered in breakfast, and helped the woman sit down in the little rocking chair.

"Sookie? Sookie, did you just speak?" Adele asked in tearful surprise.

"Mmm," Sookie smiled brightly, causing the tear in her lip to split back open. "I did."

"Oh, God," Adele choked as she pushed away from the chair and hugged her granddaughter with a mindful gentleness. "My sweet girl," Adele cooed as she smoothed Sookie's hair. "I'm going to see if I can get an extra appointment scheduled for you and Dr. Broadway!" she announced before bustling out of the room and leaving the couple standing and sitting in their breakfast.

"I should strip the bedding before the orange juice soaks into the mattress," Eric commented. "Why don't you go take a bath?"

"I'll wa-ait for you," Sookie's smile softened as she rolled out of bed and helped strip the blankets. When the sheets were a pile on the floor, the couple went to the bathroom and slipped out of their sticky clothing.

"No funny business," Eric warned as he turned on the water. Sookie felt her face protest as it scrunched into a would-be-pout. Watching her fiancé bend over with his perfect butt taunting her was more than enough for her to want to risk further injury. Instead, she followed the rules and didn't put additional stress into the situation. She knew Eric would blame himself if she felt any pain, and she knew lovemaking couldn't be painless for her right now.

With the water warm and filling the tub, Eric climbed in first to sit and help Sookie situate herself while keeping her cast dry.

As Sookie stepped into the hot water, Eric couldn't help but look at the insulting marks all over her body. Bruises and scrapes taunted him, mocking his inability to protect his Sookie. It wasn't until her body was nestled against his and the water turned off that Eric reclaimed his calm. He focused on washing remaining orange juice from her and maybe paying a little too much attention cleaning between her thighs. It wasn't his intention to get Sookie riled up, but something in the back of his brain warned that if he denied any interest that would hurt her more than a bit of wishful touching.

"I love you so much," Eric murmured as he finished washing them both and finally reclined into the water. Though his height made most tubs uncomfortable, or plain, old impossible to relax; Eric found the clawfoot soaker pleasantly accommodating.

"I love you, too," Sookie whispered, the steam of the bath feeling good on her sore throat. She cleared it experimentally, and more of the tension alleviated.

"How are you feeling?" Eric wondered.

"Surprised," Sookie confessed, reaching up to stroke his arm that was draped across her chest.

"About?"

"I thought I'd sound stranger," Sookie confessed.

Eric smiled and gently nuzzled the back of Sookie's head, "You _did_ speak at one time, Sookie, and you've still mouthed words for the last year at least. I'm not surprised that most of the strain is coming from your throat."

"I suppose," Sookie considered as she closed her eyes and let the heat sink into her skin and muscles. Though some of her cuts and bruises stung and itched from the excessive warmth, the other effects were welcome.

"Sookie," Eric's voice was more hesitant this time.

"Mmm?"

"Was Bill Compton one of the assholes that attacked you yesterday?" Eric asked quietly.

Sookie paused but reasoned that Bill was safely in police custody. "He was the only attacker," she finally stated. She heard Eric suck in a deep breath from his nose and felt his arms and hands tighten briefly. They quickly relaxed as though Eric had realized he could hurt Sookie further if he lost his temper.

"I'm glad you didn't tell me at first," Eric finally found the composure he needed to respond to Sookie's confession. "I would have walked right over to his house and beat the shit out of him."

"I know," Sookie replied, remembering Jason telling her how Eric had smashed Bill's face into a locker for bullying her before.

"But why didn't you tell the police right away? Why did the Sheriff have to come out to you?" Eric wondered.

Sookie slowly explained, "I didn't know what Jason would do."

Eric's shoulders relaxed, "I see. You were just waiting for a private moment?"

"But Gran was with me once the cops sho-owed up," she continued.

"And she would have mentioned it to Jason," Eric understood at last. "So it had nothing to do with… Thinking you deserved this?" He had to be sure she was past this punching bag mentality.

"I didn't deserve thi-is," Sookie choked out. "I deserved to ho-old you this weekend."

"Yes you did," Eric agreed as he leaned around to capture her lips in a brief kiss.

Their kiss ended quickly, but silence followed until the water grew cold. Finally, the pair decided to get out of the tub and dry off. When the couple returned to Sookie's room, the soiled bedding was gone, and the bed had been redressed.

"Gran sure can move," Eric laughed to himself as he bundled Sookie into a robe and tucked them both back into bed.

"How lo-ong are you sta-aying?" Sookie asked as she snuggled carefully into his side.

"I don't know," Eric admitted as he began tugging the ends of her hair. It had become as much of a soothing action to him as it had to Sookie. When she looked up at him in confusion, Eric sighed. "I don't want to leave you."

"I don't want you to le-eave either, but you ha-ave to," Sookie smiled.

"I just don't know how I can go back to school while you're like this," Eric told her, his expression pained at the very thought.

"Only a month," Sookie comforted.

"You'll still be in a cast when I get home," Eric frowned, gingerly touching the plaster. "Maybe I could stay a few extra days."

Sookie thought for a moment, "Co-ome to my therapy session?"

When Eric nodded in agreement, Sookie felt relieved. With any luck, Amelia would be able to put some of Eric's fears to rest.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	19. Chapter 19

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **CHAPTER NINETEEN: BRUISED**

" _I'm sorry, Sookie, but Bill seems to have made a run for it."_

That sentence had been ringing in Eric's ears for the past three days, and even a visit with Sookie to Dr. Broadway had not dampened the statement from his memory. Now, after considerable urging and even some threats made by his fiancée, Eric was finally on the plane ride back to New Orleans.

It was the longest flight of his life, which was saying something for a young man who had flown overseas multiple times and was the son of United States Air Force pilot. Eric was grateful when the journey ended, and he could exit the gate to see John Quinn waiting for him to give a lift back to the dorms.

"Dude, you're late," Quinn remarked, but could only raise his eyebrows in surprise at Eric's haggard appearance. "What the hell happened? You and Sookie break up or something?"

"I need a drink," Eric rumbled, not bothering to shorten his stride as he walked past Quinn.

"Eric," Quinn touched his friend's shoulder, "you've never said you _needed a drink_. What the fuck happened?"

"Get me in front of a bottle, and I'll tell you all about it," Eric answered as he shook off Quinn's hand and stormed through the airport. The irritated blond only stopped briefly at the payphones and made a few quick calls before gesturing impatiently to the doors.

"You're starting to freak me out, Man," Quinn commented as they went to his car and he quickly scouted out a bar to get the story of Eric's extended stay in Bon Temps.

When the pair were saddled up at the bar, Eric ordered two shots of bourbon and a Guinness. The two small glasses were quickly thrown back before Quinn could reach for one, and then the beer was up to Eric's lips.

"Someone beat my fiancée," Eric finally spoke.

"At what?" Quinn was confused.

" _Beat_ , battered, assaulted," Eric snapped. "Take your pick! He fucking broke her arm and some ribs."

Quinn's jaw slung open in surprise, "Fuck, man, what the _hell_?"

"You know I told you she was bullied?" Eric reminded, and Quinn nodded. "She stood up for herself, and they got her back for it after school. He jumped her when she was walking home from the bus stop."

"The cops got the guy though, right?" Quinn demanded.

Eric shook his head, "She hesitated to say right away. She was scared of what her brother or I would do if we got to him before the police. Jason figured out who it was and went and beat the shit out of him, but I guess the little bitch figured the cops would come next, so he skipped town."

"Jesus, Eric, I'm so sorry," Quinn looked at his Coors just to have something to stare at instead of his wreck of a best friend.

There was a long silence before a masked sniffle beside him drew Quinn's attention back to Eric.

"Sookie started talking. She told me she loved me."

"Are you serious?" Quinn felt his emotions ricochet into joy. "That's amazing, Eric!"

"So you see why I'm just… fucked up?" Eric asked before draining the rest of his beer and flagging the server for another one.

Quinn could undoubtedly see the emotional battle his friend was facing. On the other hand, he'd seen a couple friends already wade into the early signs of alcoholism, and he didn't want that for Eric.

"I get it, Eric, but… just take it easy on the drinks, okay?" Quinn tried to gently warn him.

When the server placed another pint of Guinness in front of him, Eric stared at it a moment before taking a slow sip. "I'll just drink this one, and then we can go back to campus," he assured. Quinn was pleasantly surprised when Eric did just that. He nursed his fourth drink for an hour, expressing his concerns for leaving Sookie behind.

"You only got another quarter until you two are together, and Sookie can have a fresh start as soon as she finishes school," Quinn encouraged as he walked with Eric to the car. "I seriously doubt that Cunton is gonna come after her again. He ran away to save his ass, not so he could get vengeance later."

Eric snorted at Quinn's new name for Bill Compton, but was quickly overtaken with concern, "How could you know that?"

Quinn frowned, "Because he's been picking on a defenseless little girl for his entire life. Now that she's not taking any of his shit, he's going to move back to people too weak or scared to stand up to him. He doesn't want a punching bag that hits back. He's too weak to handle that."

"That's true. When I threatened Bill, he backed off her," Eric remembered. "The second her brother and I weren't there to keep him in check; he was right back to his bullshit."

"See? She'll be fine until you guys can start over down here," Quinn patted his friend on the shoulder before shoving him into the passenger seat and then strolling around the car to get behind the wheel.

"Are you okay to drive?" Eric asked.

"Dude, I had _one_ beer over the course of an hour. I'm fine," Quinn laughed as he turned the key in the ignition and pulled out of the parking space. "You going to be alright tonight? Wanna crash at the house with me?"

"I wish I could go somewhere to be alone," Eric commented as he leaned his head back against the seat. "Everyone's going to be badgering me about why I was gone so long."

"Not to bring it up even more," Quinn grimaced, "but how's Sookie handling Bill getting away?"

Eric snorted on a laugh, "Better than anyone else!"

"Seriously?" Quinn asked in surprise.

"She said it's real justice because Bill did such a good job of running her away from her home, and now he's gone and gotten himself exiled from it himself," Eric explained. "As long as he doesn't want to serve time, he can't come back to Bon Temps."

Quinn let out a low whistle, "And she's okay with him getting away like that?"

"I don't know. We went to see Sookie's therapist yesterday, and with everything that happened, I can't quite figure out how Sookie feels," Eric confessed. "I think I'm too angry to absorb anything. That's the second kick in the balls about this. I'm in so much pain and have so much anger about it that things that have always come naturally to me aren't easy anymore. I've always been able to just look at Sookie's face and _get it_. Now? I don't know."

Quinn nodded as if he understood, but he remained silent. What was really striking him wasn't the fact that Eric's fiancée had been assaulted, but the peculiarity of Eric _sharing_ all of this with him. He knew that they were close, but he was more than aware that Eric didn't like looking weak.

"Are you going to classes tomorrow?" Quinn asked, hoping a change of subject would help him ease the shiver running across his shoulders.

"Yeah," Eric replied, looking out the window.

When silence overtook the car again, Quinn swallowed hard and whispered, "Hey, Eric… Do you think… You should see someone, too? Maybe someone who could, y'know, help you sort through things?"

Eric sighed and finally admitted, "I think getting it off my chest helped a lot."

"Why didn't you just say it to Sookie?" Quinn wondered.

"How could I? She'd think I was mad at her," Eric pointed out.

Quinn rolled his eyes, "No she wouldn't. You guys talk about everything. You're the only long-distance couple I saw get through their first year apart without incident."

"I don't want her to worry about me," Eric grumbled.

Rolling to a stop at a light, Quinn frowned and glared at his friend. "Dude, just write her a letter about it or something. Get it written so that she understands what you're feeling and why, and just spill your guts already! Maybe it's not _you_. Maybe _both_ of you are at a loss for communicating now that she can speak. Did you ever think _that's_ the problem? So go back to your roots. Talk how you guys know how."

Eric considered the suggestion and decided that writing out how he felt might be therapeutic. He even bargained with himself that he didn't have to send the letter if the mere act of writing it alleviated some of the pain inside.

When they arrived in silence at the dorm, Eric gave a solemn, 'thank you,' to his friend and headed up to his room. Alcide was already asleep, and Eric went to his desk to begin writing the letter he hoped would cure the anger that was threatening to swallow him.

February 18

Dear Sookie,

I've missed you since I walked away from you at the airport. It was the longest flight of my life, and after a talk with Quinn, I think it's because I left you with so much open and unresolved.

It might be because of Compton, it might be because you can speak now, but I haven't been as open with you over the past few days as I used to be. I'm scared for you, and I'm angry for you. Leaving today was harder than ever because if I feel this way, I'm terrified that you feel a hundred times worse, and I'm not there to help you.

Tagging along to your therapy session did nothing for me. I don't need the help of a professional. I just need to know that you're okay. I need you to smile and to feel that it's genuine. I need to know that you still tell me everything, and you're not trying to be brave like when the bullying started back up.

That was the only time that I can recall that you hid something from me. I need you to know that you don't have to hide from me. Whether it's words or fists, please, please, please tell me if someone's hurting you…

Love always,

Eric

{†}

Sookie lay in bed, reading the letter from Eric for the fifth time. She hadn't been back to school yet, deciding to take the week off before returning. Gran didn't even put forth the pretense of a protest, accommodating her granddaughter's wishes.

"Eric will be home in a few more weeks for Spring Break," Gran commented as she came into the bedroom with the laundry basket. Sookie lay gloomily in her bed. "Are you counting down?"

"Gran?"

The grandmother felt her heart flutter at hearing Sookie's voice. It was still so new and welcome, but also strange. Every so often, Gran would have expected to hear the barn cat, Tina, utter a phrase before she'd expect it from Sookie.

"Yes, Dear?" Gran began putting away the laundry merely to keep herself busy and not put too much spotlight on Sookie. As the concussion abated, her family began to notice that Sookie had a harder time speaking when she was watched. The fact that she could still talk was encouraging, however, and the doctors, as well as Amelia, were optimistic that her ability to speak wouldn't completely disappear.

"I don't… feel good," Sookie choked out.

Adele quickly put the t-shirt she was holding on the bed and came to sit beside Sookie. "What's wrong?" she asked anxiously.

"My stomach hurts," Sookie whispered. "And my throat…"

Her grandmother smiled as she soothed back Sookie's hair, "Do you need a good cry?"

"It won't…" she flailed her hands, trying to express that she couldn't get to that point. Something inside of her just wasn't letting go, and as much as Sookie knew a good sob would help, it just wouldn't happen.

"Sometimes, you just need help getting started," Gran chuckled. "Come on, let's go watch _Steel Magnolias_."

Sookie let herself be hauled out of bed and into the living room. Together, grandmother and granddaughter watched the tear-jerker, and it wasn't long before the movie had done its job. Sookie turned her watering eyes against Adele's shoulder and began sobbing.

"That's a good girl. Let it all out," Gran crooned as she smoothed Sookie's hair.

After half an hour of tears, Sookie fell asleep on the couch, and Adele finished the rest of the household chores while the young woman rested. Sookie was still asleep when Pam arrived to drop off the day's homework.

"Hey, Gran," Pam greeted as she came through the kitchen door. "How's Sookie?"

"I think she's good," Adele smiled. "She had a nice cry today. _Finally_!"

Pam's shoulders slumped, "She cried?"

"She needed it, Pam," Adele assured. "Haven't you ever felt so overwhelmed that you wanted to just be sick from it?"

"I guess," Pam frowned. "Is she in her room?"

"No, she's resting on the couch," Adele gestured to the living room.

"I'll go put her stuff on the coffee table, then," Pam waved as she went to the living room and found Sookie laying on her side, staring at the blank TV. "Hey there. How are you feeling?" Pam crouched down but made sure not to stare at Sookie.

"Better," Sookie offered groggily.

"Better than?" Pam pressed.

"When Eric left," Sookie replied.

Pam sighed as she began playing with the ends of Sookie's hair. "I guess he made the whole thing not so scary?" Sookie nodded in agreement. "And now you _are_ scared and upset?"

"It was ea-asier… when he was… a-angry fo-or me," Sookie explained roughly.

Nodding in understanding, Pam patted Sookie's hand awkwardly. "And now you've got to deal with the anger and fear by yourself." Sookie nodded. "You're not alone, though. You've got me, Gran, Godric, and Jason! No one's going to touch you ever again! So help me God!"

Smiling weakly, Sookie nodded again. The mention of Jason brought a flash of anger. It was brief, but still there, and it was only with the absence of her sorrow that she finally understood why she was angry. If Jason hadn't confronted Bill, then he might not have run off before the police got to his house. If Sookie hadn't been so worried about what everyone else would do, she could have told the cops before Jason had beaten up Bill. All in all, she felt angry at herself more than anyone, and how could she say that to Eric?

 _Of course, the last time you tried to hide the bad stuff from Eric, you were bullied for two months straight,_ Sookie reminded herself. _And then when he found out, he was utterly devastated._

"Sookie?" Pam called when she noticed her friend's eyes glaze over thoughtfully.

"Hmm?" Sookie's eyes snapped back to Pam.

"I brought something for you," Pam grinned as she opened her book bag and extracted a beach bag. "I figured it would do fine for the remainder of the school year with only a couple months left."

Sookie took the bag from her friend. Her heart raced as she recalled why the replacement was needed. Sheriff Dearborne had found Sookie's previous book bag in the field Bill had chased her through. One of the straps had ripped off, and the teeth of the zipper had busted. Her books had spilled over three feet, the space of Sookie's fall, to the ground. The sight of the beating had been temporarily marked by the flattened grass and flecks of blood.

 _By now the grass will be standing up again like nothing happened,_ Sookie thought as she gazed at her broken arm.

"Thank you," Sookie whispered as she quickly put the bag behind her to try and dispel the memory.

"You're coming back to school on Monday, right?" Pam already knew the answer, but conversation felt strained these past few days. She didn't blame Sookie for feeling withdrawn, but Pam desperately wanted to protect her friend from any more suffering.

"Yes," Sookie replied.

"Dr. Jones asked about you today," Pam mentioned. "He told me to tell you that you're welcome to hang in his classroom during free periods."

Dr. Jones used to let her do that before the Northmans arrived, but she'd had him as her teacher the previous two years. She hadn't wanted to bother him when she wasn't taking any of his classes this year.

"And I talked to the principal about-"

"Pam," Sookie interrupted, "it's okay. You do-on't have to worry."

Deflating a bit, Pam considered her options before finally standing up and preparing to leave. "I guess I'll just let you do your thing for now."

"Pam," Sookie reached for her friend's hand, "thank you."

"Just don't hold it all in, okay?" Pam encouraged.

"I promise," Sookie offered a stunted, careful smile that made Pam cast her gaze down. She missed Sookie's open, carefree smiles that had been stolen for nearly the past week.

As Sookie watched Pam leave the house, she played with the fuzz of the wrapping near her palm. Her heart was aching, her lungs felt shallow, and her fingers tugged and twisted the soft part of her cast with visible anxiety.

When it became too much, Sookie went to her room and took out a pen and paper.

Dear Eric,

{†}

February 22

Dear Eric,

Everything is different now. After so many years of being picked on and even struck by others, I never really felt angry about it before. Sadness and depression would be more accurate. I felt weak, and unmotivated to be strong. Sometimes, I didn't believe I deserved the strength to change. Regardless of what I'm about to say, I know I didn't deserve what happened.

Even though I won't drop the charges I filed, I'm okay with Bill running off. I've chosen not to care about him or his problems. I hope that you can understand my feelings on the situation and that you can let go of your own anger and hatred for Bill in time. Holding on to all of that can lead to exactly what Bill experienced. He was consumed by something that happened a very long time ago, and he let it control him. Don't be ruled by the same darkness. Forgive and move on. I have.

 _I guess what I want to tell you is that I'm not scared. I'm_ definitely _tired. I'll continue counting down the hours until you're home with me forever. From there I'll countdown the days until being in this place that's rejected me for so long doesn't have the satisfaction of reminding me I'm unwelcome._

With any luck, today's the last day Bon Temps has forced me to cry.

Love always,

Your Sookie

Eric read the letter through several times since receiving it the previous day, and still couldn't help but stare at the messy scrawl of his fiancée's left-handed writing. After a while, Eric hoped he would be able to let go and accept Sookie's hopes of taking the high road. Instead, he had just felt the anger fester hotter and hotter inside of him.

"You okay, man?"

Eric looked up to see Quinn standing over him. They were in the library, and his friend's inquiry had invited a wave of hushing sounds.

"I'm still brooding about everything," Eric whispered the admittance.

"Is that Sookie's letter?" Quinn asked, and Eric nodded. "What's it say?" Handing over the paper, Eric waited as Quinn read. When he was done, his friend let out a low hum. "Wow. Your fiancée is a fucking saint. Talk about turning the other cheek!"

"I'm relieved that she doesn't feel like she deserved it," Eric mumbled, "but I still think on some level she believes that."

Quinn shrugged, "If she does, then that's something she has to work through. How are _you_ working through things?"

"Not well-"

When another grumbling of disapproval rippled through the library, Eric jerked his head to the door. This wasn't the place for unloading thoughts aloud.

Catching on to Eric's gesture, Quinn followed the blond giant outside. They walked in the crisp February air for a few moments before Eric finally began releasing his pent-up anger. "I want to kill him, or at least beat him until he's so fucked up he wished he were dead."

"Whoa," Quinn stared at the sudden, but not necessarily unexpected, outburst. "I guess that's a natural response? Sookie made a good point, though. Shit like that rots inside you. It will get more disgusting and fucked up the longer you hold onto it."

"I don't know how to let it go," Eric confessed.

"Okay, instead of trying to let it go, why don't you think about what would happen if you did something about it?" Quinn suggested.

Eric paused, "Well, I'd go to jail for murder or at the very least, assault. Sookie would be pissed at me, and we probably wouldn't end up getting married any time soon, if at all."

"Feel like killing that asshole now?" Quinn asked.

With an agitated grunt, Eric shook his head. "Not as much."

"Sometimes more than letting go of something, you have to weigh the consequences," Quinn pointed out. "Are the results really worth the costs?"

"I didn't expect you to be so grounded," Eric told him with the first genuine laugh he'd had in days.

Quinn shrugged, "I got my impulsive streaks, but I've gotten into enough trouble to learn the difference between being spontaneous and being reckless."

"So have I," Eric responded, but he seemed to doubt his own claims.

Quinn glanced at his friend and patted his shoulder, "Sometimes, you need someone else to ground you. From what I read in that letter, it's obvious you picked a good wife. She's tough, she's forgiving, and she's _way_ too good for you."

Eric snorted on a laugh, "Trust me; I've been told that many times already, and so has she. Somehow, though, she's sticking with me."

"Like I said: she's a fucking saint," Quinn repeated as he slapped Eric on the back. "Want to go with me to the gym?"

At first, Eric was going to decline the invitation but quickly thought better of it. Letting off steam in the gym seemed like a much better alternative than spending more time in his head. Left to his own devices, the man thought he could quite possibly devise a murder plot that would keep him from being caught. _Sookie would figure it out, though,_ he considered amusedly as he finally accepted Quinn's offer. The two headed for the gym, and after a ten mile run on a treadmill, the only death Eric had on his mind was his own via dehydration.

When Eric dragged himself back to the dorm, he was grateful to find Alcide missing, and he checked his watch before he reached for the phone.

" _Hello?"_ a familiar voice lilted over the line.

"Hey, Gran, it's Eric," the future grandson-in-law greeted. "Can you put Sookie on?"

" _Her speech therapy hasn't even begun yet. You expect way too much out of that girl!"_ Gran teased before handing the phone off to her granddaughter." _It's Eric, Dear."_

"Sookie? Are you there?" Eric asked after a moment.

" _Mmm."_

Eric smiled. "I got your letter today, and I showed it to Quinn. He says you're too good for me."

" _Mmm,"_ she replied in an agreeable noise that made Eric laugh.

"I just wanted to let you know that I never thought you were weak. Sometimes you can be a little naïve, but in the best ways," Eric told his fiancée. "I wanted to tell you that I'm feeling rational again, and not to worry about me doing something stupid. Focus on getting better and healing."

" _Mmm,"_ Sookie answered, and Eric once again marveled at her ability to express so much with a single syllable.

"I guess that's all I needed to say," Eric mumbled after a moment. "I will still send you a letter, though, so don't worry." He heard Sookie giggle at his assurance. "I'll talk to you later. I love you." He waited for a beat as he could almost feel Sookie trying to reciprocate his declaration.

Soon his patience paid off, and a disjointed," _I love you too,"_ graced his ears.

Hanging up the phone, Eric turned to flop onto his bed. The young man kept reminding himself that it was only a few more months until they would be married, and he would never have to leave her side again. In fact, Eric was hoping to broach the possibility of Sookie coming to stay at Rosenfont Hall until the wedding. The sooner he could glue himself to her side, the better, in his opinion.

Before Eric could continue contemplating the future he was anticipating, the door opened, and he sat up to greet Alcide. Instead, it was Debbie that stood in the entrance.

"Hey, Eric," Debbie waved at him merrily.

"Hey, Deb," Eric flopped back against his mattress once more. "Alcide's not back yet."

"Oh," she gave the room a glance before coming in the rest of the way. "Is it okay if I wait here?"

"Sure, I'm just going to start some studying in a minute," Eric told her as he mustered up the strength to roll out of bed. Midterms were in two weeks, and he'd been slacking on his studying after everything that had happened around Valentine's Day.

"How's Sookie doing?" his roommate's girlfriend asked with polite curiosity.

"She's been better, but she's tough."

"So did she drop charges?" Eric raised himself up to look at Debbie incredulously. "Oh, Alcide mentioned it. I guess I wasn't supposed to know about that?" She gave a weak grimace.

Sitting up the rest of the way, Eric finally slid to the floor and reached for his bag. "No, she's still pressing charges, but it doesn't really matter if they can't find him. She's taking it in stride though."

"Wow," Debbie shook her head, "I couldn't imagine someone doing that to me and _not_ putting their ass in jail as long as humanly possible! I mean, I guess if I was in love with them, that might be the only way." Eric looked at her annoyedly. "Maybe I should wait for Alcide somewhere else-"

"No," Eric stopped her from leaving, "tell me what you meant by that."

Pausing briefly, Debbie shuffled closer to Eric and sat on the floor next to him. "I just meant that I'd only be able to forgive someone for that if I had really deep feelings for them. I wouldn't let just anyone off the hook if they hurt me like that."

"Some people are naturally forgiving," Eric told her. He refused to believe that Sookie had feelings for Bill. When Debbie laughed, he glared at her.

"What? You wanted me to tell you what I meant, didn't you? It sounds like you're in denial to me," Debbie pointed out. "I mean, what do you really know about a girl who can't have a slip of the tongue? She can't babble or anything like that. How do you know what she really feels?"

"I know how she feels," Eric spoke harshly, "because she pushed herself for months just to be able to say it. Can you imagine _that_ , Debbie? Can you _comprehend_ the effort behind overcoming what she's had to overcome just so she could tell me she loves me? That's how I know what she really feels. Because she's _told_ me."

Grabbing his bag, Eric stood sharply from the floor and stormed out of his dorm. He'd hang in Felipe's dorm until his roommate's bitch of a girlfriend finally left. The end of the semester couldn't come soon enough!

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	20. Chapter 20

**EDIT** AGAIN, TO BE CLEAR, THIS CHAPTER WAS ADJUSTED FOR NOTHING MORE THAN TIMELINE ERROR CORRECTION. WE ARE GOING INTO SPRING BREAK, NOT THE END OF THE SEMESTER.

 **Unspoken Feelings**

CHAPTER TWENTY: WHAT DID I MISS?

February 23

Dear Sookie,

Alcide's girlfriend has practically kept me exiled from my dorm room. She's there every day, and I'm losing my mind!

If you're wondering why I'm ranting about her all the sudden, it's because she had the nerve to suggest that you let Compton get away because– get this– you're in love with him!

Now, every time I see her face, I just want to scream at her, and I can't concentrate to save my life. I have no idea how I'm going to study for midterms with her annoying voice talking endlessly to Alcide. I guess I'll have to make a home in the library.

I'm not sure which is more frustrating; being away from you or listening to idiots talk about our relationship like they know a damned thing?

I hope you're healing and that Pam is taking good care of you. I love you so much and can't wait the two weeks before I can do my last test and jump on a plane back to you for a whole week!

I love you,

Eric

Signing his name, Eric folded the letter, stuffed it in an envelope and licked it shut. He searched his desk for a minute before finding that he was out of stamps.

With a sigh, Eric took the envelope, addressed it and headed out to the post office for what he hoped to be the last book he'd buy for quite some time. Of course, there would be bills to pay next year, but his postage financing would drop significantly for the next few months.

"Hey, Eric," Alcide greeted tiredly as he passed his roommate in the hall.

"Hey," Eric returned as he watched Alcide slump into their room. With everything that had been happening with him and Sookie, it was only in that moment that Eric realized that Alcide had looked exhausted the past week. Deciding to wait to mail his letter, Eric returned to his room and gave a quick knock in the doorframe. "Is everything all right?"

Alcide glanced back at the knock. "Yeah, why?"

"You look run down," Eric commented.

His roommate shrugged, "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

"Midterms are in two weeks," Eric reminded him. "Is it that or something else?"

"Something else," Alcide sighed in frustration.

"Don't you think you'd be able to concentrate better if you talked it out?" Eric suggested. "I know we aren't much of friends, but-"

"Debbie went out without me last night," Alcide blurted out suddenly.

"And?" Eric entered further into the room.

"And it's been happening a lot more often the past month," Alcide whispered. "She's missed a lot of her morning classes this semester, and she just barely kept from flunking out through the first semester."

"She hasn't talked to you about any of it?" Eric came and sat on his desk chair.

Alcide shook his head, "This past week has been pretty nuts because it's the most time she's spent with me in the evenings since we got to school. Even when she's physically here, though, she doesn't seem to be with me. You know?"

Eric nodded slowly, "You have no idea what's been bothering her?"

Alcide stared at his hands dully. "We went to a lot of parties when we first started school," Eric remembered often falling asleep in an empty room the first semester. It had been awesome. "But I noticed my grades dropping and cut out with all the parties. Debbie didn't. She was hungover a lot, and… I've been scared to ask her, but I think she might be doing drugs."

Eric bowed his head gloomily. The past year he had been so absorbed in missing Sookie and all of their problems that he had been almost entirely ignorant of the predicaments going on around him. The fact that his own roommate had been living with these concerns was troubling in itself, but to know that Eric hadn't even been aware of those issues was shameful.

"I'm sorry I didn't notice," Eric apologized. He realized then that Debbie had actually said rather nice things at times. Maybe drugs were the problem. Perhaps his dislike for her had been amplified by Debbie's college experimentations and not her usual personality.

"It's okay… I mean, you and I aren't exactly friends. We're just a couple guys that don't really pay each other much mind," Alcide mumbled.

"That's not really it," Eric told him. "I think you and I could've been friends if I hadn't been so wrapped up in missing Sookie. You and I actually get along pretty well."

Alcide smiled briefly, "Yeah, and you always shared your care packages with me."

"I could never finish all of those things she sent me by myself," Eric grinned back. The two were silent for a long moment before Eric finally uttered, "Next year, we won't be roommates, but if you want to still hang out…?"

"Really?" Alcide raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"Yeah, and Sookie and I won't be leaving for England until mid-June, so if you want to meet up in Shreveport, I'd like that too."

"Cool, man," Alcide nodded slowly. "I'd like that."

"If you need to talk about Debbie, I'm all ears. You listened to me whine about Sookie all year, so it's the least I can do," Eric offered.

"Okay, okay," Alcide laughed, "you can pull back on the apologetic actions, man. I get it, you're sorry."

"I'm also serious," Eric assured before he stood up. "I'll leave you alone now, but if you need to talk- let me know."

"Will do," Alcide waved as Eric finally left the room, and the blond man made his way outside.

Finally on his way to the Post Office again, Eric felt better about his relationship with his roommate. In all honesty, Eric liked Alcide and thought that he was a rather decent guy. Discovering what Alcide had been going through during the school year only made Eric like him more.

{†}

February 27

Dear Eric,

School's been a nightmare. Before you panic– no. No one's picking on me. Actually, everyone's been uncomfortably kind to me. People who haven't talked to me in years are suddenly asking about our wedding. Classmates who were pushing me into lockers are offering to carry my books to my next class. I'd like it better if they'd just ignore me instead of trying to take pity on me.

Although, Tara Thornton started talking to me again. She used to be my best friend until the car accident. Tara apologized to me my first day back to school and said she knew it was wrong to avoid me but was scared she'd be bullied even worse if she stayed my friend. A couple of days later, Tara dropped by the house, and I told her I forgive her. You should have seen her face! Gran and Pam helped me explain that talking is still challenging, and nearly impossible if people are staring at me. They told her it would be better if she didn't let the rest of the school know, and as far as I can tell, no one's said a word about it.

Anyway, so Pam, Tara, and Tara's cousin, Lafayette have all been hanging out with me. Lafayette graduated the year before you and Jason, so you never met him. I'm delighted that Pam and Tara are hanging out. Hopefully, they'll get each other through their Senior year since I'll be gone.

I'm sorry Debbie seems to be giving you a hard time, but next year won't be so bad! We'll be together, a united front against her comments, and don't even try believing that she's right about my feelings for Bill. If you've found yourself wondering about my feelings for him, I'll assure you that I've never had a crush on him. As for my calm about his escape? I dunno, I can't help that he gave the cops the slip, and I'm not going to let it eat me up. Either he'll slip up and get caught one day, or he'll get away with it. I'm not going to waste another minute of my life worrying about justice or vengeance. I have too beautiful of a future ahead of me to spend any of it thinking about Bill Compton.

I love you so much,

Sookie

{†}

March 1

Dear Sookie,

As much as I hate gossip and talking about other people's relationships, Alcide shared some news about Debbie. I guess she's been getting a little too into the college drug culture. She's also been going out without telling Alcide about it. The guy seemed really worried and lost on what to do. I wish I knew what to say to him.

By the way, that was one long letter you sent me! I was surprised considering you're still in a cast! Although, it was definitely a pleasant surprise!

Midterms start next week. I should be getting my schedule for it tomorrow. Once I do, I'll let you know when to expect me home. I'm sorry your classmates are annoying you, but I'm glad that they're at least treating you like a human at last!

Love always,

Eric

{†}

March 5

Dear Eric,

Since it's my elbow that's busted, I still have pretty decent mobility in my wrist. The biggest problem is that the cast wraps between my thumb and the rest of my hand! I have to hold the pen out, and it makes my hand get tired faster.

Anyway, I'm sad to hear about Debbie and that Alcide is having a hard time because of it. From the stories you've told me, he's seemed like a really decent guy, and anyone who loves my baking gets automatic high scores from me!

I can't wait until you're home! I know it's only for a week, but I'll take whatever I can get at this point! That doesn't mean slack off studying for your tests because you're distracted about coming home! Remember to let loose some while studying, and get plenty of rest.

I love you so, so much,

Sookie

Eric smiled as he put the letter down and returned to his notes. He was once again taking refuge in the library, avoiding Debbie at all costs. The last time he'd been caught alone in the dorm room had undoubtedly been eye-opening. With the suspicion that Debbie was now using drugs, Eric was more aware of her.

What Eric didn't understand was Debbie's obsession with his and Sookie's relationship. She would alternate between complimenting their commitment and simultaneously undermine its authenticity. Debbie seemed adamant about proving that one of them was cheating. She would try and verify this each time by making a subtle move on Eric only to be shot down. When her efforts were useless, she departed with a comment about Sookie being less than faithful.

None of that mattered, however, because his midterms started in two days. This meant that in five days, he'd be heading home for a whole week.

"Is this seat taken?"

Eric looked up with exasperation only to choke on his tongue. Before him stood a woman with dark eyes, dark hair, and a lithe figure. She was tall and shapely. Eric wouldn't have been surprised if she told him she was paying her way through college as a model.

"No," Eric replied with whispered deference to the library.

"Cool," the woman sat down with her books and smiled at him. "I'm Claudine."

"Eric," he extended his hand. "Got a major?"

Claudine shook her head, "No, just doing my pre-reqs this year. My great grandpa really wants me to get my degree in business, though. He thinks my cousin's going to run the family business into the ground."

"I'm working toward my degree in accounting," Eric offered.

"Ew, numbers," Claudine stuck out her tongue playfully.

Quickly, Eric adjusted to the stunning beauty beside him and managed a sincere smile. "I like numbers, but I am planning to minor in business."

"Really? Do you want to own your own business?" Claudine asked.

"Sort of," Eric glanced at his letter to Sookie and explained. "My fiancée is a terrific baker. I thought, maybe, we'd open a pastry shop together up in Shreveport."

"Are you from Shreveport?" Claudine asked curiously.

"I'm from all over," Eric chuckled softly, "Sookie's from Bon Temps, though. It's a little south of-"

"I know Bon Temps!" Claudine crowed happily, only to be viciously shushed by the stressed students. "My family is from Monroe," she explained softly.

"Really? You have practically no accent," Eric pointed out.

"My brother and I got shipped off to school in Maine when we were ten years old," Claudine admitted. "I guess we lost a bit of the Southern twang."

Eric smiled at her explanation before glancing back at his study materials. "I guess we should get to work now," he suggested.

"Yeah," Claudine sighed reluctantly. "Hey, are you good at math?"

"Yes," Eric snorted. He'd just told her his major.

"Can you help me with this real quick?" She tilted her book toward him.

Eric sighed but nodded in agreement. The more he talked to Claudine, the more it demystified her beauty. She quickly became just another girl Eric went to school with and flushed away her natural charm. Relief flooded Eric as he overcame the attraction of the only girl to give him pause since arriving at school.

And it wasn't even difficult, Eric laughed to himself. Everyone had tried to make him succumb to this doubt that some beautiful woman could steal his heart from Sookie. Now, Eric felt he had probably met the closest woman to a supermodel he would ever meet, and he felt no shred of consideration to abandon his love for his fiancée. It was stupid, and Eric had never doubted his feelings, but to finally have confirmation beyond his own beliefs was fortifying.

Next year he wouldn't have to prove a thing. Eric's attachment and devotions would be clear to everyone once they finally met his bride. He would love her with all his heart, and no one would ever feel the need to question them again.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	21. Chapter 21

**Unspoken** **Feelings**

 _A/N: Alright, I'm back! Thanks for holding out these past few weeks, everyone! Hopefully, we won't have any further delays! Also, the previous two chapters have been edited because I realized while doing this catch-up that I got my dates screwed up. Therefore, the previous two chapters have been adjusted to reflect we are at MIDTERMS not FINALS. So, we're actually on Spring Break, not quite the end of the semester, but not to worry! I won't spend too much longer on our couple's forced separation._

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Twenty-One: Pictures and Memories**

"I guess last minute help on that math test helped a lot," Eric chuckled as he looked at Claudine's paper.

"I can't thank you enough for that," Claudine mumbled as she shoved the page back into her carry on and leaned back in her seat. "I know you had your own stuff to study for."

Eric shrugged, "It's fine. Since I don't party much, I have plenty of spare time."

"Why is that?" Claudine demanded softly as she vaguely paid attention to the flight attendant demonstrating the safety procedures for the flight.

"I'm not big on drinking, and I don't find college parties all that fun. I get sick of being hit on. I can't stand people trying to convince me I should get trashed," Eric explained.

"What if I had hit on you at a party?" Claudine teased.

Eric laughed, "I probably would have gawked for a moment and then turned you down."

"Aw, you think I'm pretty?" Claudine stuck her tongue out at him.

"Saying no is an obvious lie, and we both know it. You're gorgeous, but you're not my type," Eric laughed.

"You're too pretty for me too. You remind me of a straight, blond version of my brother," Claudine joked. "I need a woodsy man. Someone to throw some ruggedness into my vibe."

"I know a couple of those," Eric told her as the airplane began to rattle. "The question is, do you want simple or complex?"

Claudine chuckled, "I don't want one that can't hold a conversation. I get treated like a bimbo way too often!"

"Alcide definitely isn't a superficial type," Eric suggested. He liked Claudine, and he could definitely see himself putting up with her presence in his dorm room for the rest of the school year over Debbie.

"Alcide Herveaux?" Claudine asked in surprise.

"Yeah, he's my roommate. Do you know him?" Eric asked in surprise.

"I know _of_ him. He's my friend Debbie's boyfriend," Claudine frowned. "If you're his roommate, you should know his girlfriend."

Eric grimaced, "You're friends with Debbie?"

Claudine shrugged, "She's fun at parties, and she's nice enough."

"To you, maybe. Debbie keeps trying to get me to cheat on my fiancée," Eric grumbled.

"Seriously?" Claudine raised her eyebrows. "How does she do that?"

"Mostly coming on to me, but she keeps trying to convince me to go to parties and _prove_ that another woman couldn't turn my head. Secretly, I think she's hoping I'll get drunk enough to get some compromising situation on me," Eric explained.

Claudine paused, "Would she purposefully send a girl at you?"

"I wouldn't put it past her," Eric snorted. His newest friend bit her lip and looked away thoughtfully. Frustration crinkled the corners of Claudine's eyes. "What is it?"

With a long sigh, Claudine confessed, "Just before Midterms I mentioned I was having trouble in my statistics class to Debbie. She told me there was a hot guy who practically lived in the library, and if I were pleasant to him without flirting, he'd help me. It was obvious you were the guy she was talking about when I got there."

"You think Debbie was trying to set us up?" Eric guessed.

"Well, you've made it abundantly clear that she knows you get immediately turned off by girls who flirt with you, and that's usually how I get what I want out of strangers," Claudine laughed at herself. "The fact she told me _not_ to flirt? It makes me suspicious."

"I would have helped you if you flirted a little," Eric shrugged. "It would have meant I wouldn't have hung out with you other than to tutor you, though."

Claudine nodded in understanding, "Because I'd keep coming at you?"

"I'd have been worried about that, yeah," Eric agreed.

"Well, I'm glad that Debbie told me not to flirt with you," Claudine smiled widely. "You really are becoming a great friend."

"I'm glad her plan backfired," Eric laughed. "But, on that note, Debbie's boyfriend really is a great guy, and I'd hate for him to be stuck with someone like her."

Claudine raised her eyebrows suspiciously, "Are you seriously asking me to hit on Debbie's boyfriend?"

"No," Eric shook his head. "I was hoping you could tell me if you've noticed Debbie using drugs? Or maybe fooling around behind Alcide's back?"

"Well, normally, I try to stay out of other people's affairs, but seeing as you're my friend and Debbie tried to set me up- I'll make an exception," Claudine's face transformed into a frown. "I know she's been drinking a lot, but I've also noticed that she's seemed more than just drunk at some of the parties lately. If I had to guess, I'd say she's doing Ex. It's been popping up at some of the Greek parties recently."

"Anything else?" Eric pressed.

"I don't know if she's cheating on Alcide, but she tends to leave the parties with a small group of people. It's always the same two guys and two girls," Claudine continued. "I figured they were all going somewhere else to get high or something. The weird thing is, most of them seem too old to be at college parties."

The flight to Shreveport seemed short as the two friends discussed Debbie's betrayal, and Eric occasionally dropped flattering stories and descriptions of his roommate. Every time he mentioned Alcide, Claudine would laugh and punch Eric's arm.

Soon they were landing at the airport, and Eric saw his brother waiting near the gate for him.

"Hey, Godric," Eric grinned at his brother.

"Good flight?" Godric asked before he realized that a striking, dark-haired woman was standing very close to his brother.

"Yeah, Claudine got me through it," Eric chuckled as he gestured to his friend. "Claudine, this is my older brother, Godric. Godric, this is Claudine, one of my friends from school."

Godric's eyes narrowed suspiciously, "Is that right?"

"Don't give me that look," Eric rolled his eyes. "We're just friends."

"Whatever, Eric," Godric turned away and started heading toward the exit.

Claudine frowned, "Wow, do I look like a tramp or something?"

Eric shook his head, "No, it's not you. It's me."

"What'd you do?" Claudine asked.

"I'm not sure if I did anything, but I don't really know for sure," Eric replied as they followed a distance behind Godric. "Where's your ride?"

Claudine stared in confusion for a moment before she glanced around, "I don't know. Claude was supposed to pick me up." She lowered her voice to a whisper, "Did a girl he like fall for you instead?"

"There are payphones over there if you want to call home," Eric pointed over to the row of phones, effectively ending the conversation.

When Claudine nodded and headed toward the line to call her brother, Eric saw Godric stop suddenly in front of him and then storm over.

"Mind telling me what your problem is all the sudden?" Eric demanded when his older brother stood before him. "Do you think I'd cheat on Sookie? Do you have that little faith in me?"

"I've known you a lot longer than she has," Godric snapped angrily. "And bringing that girl home-"

"I'm not bringing her home! We ended up on the same flight because we both live up here! She's from Monroe!" Eric hissed impatiently.

"Save it, Eric," Godric growled back. "God knows you can't keep a promise to me, so why should you be able to keep one to Sookie? I'll applaud you for keeping it this long, though! It took you until the following weekend to sleep with Naomi after I told you liked her!"

The younger brother's jaw tightened at the accusation. "How about you run back to Bon Temps and tell Sookie all about Claudine then?" Eric gave up trying to reason with his brother. "Ask her yourself if I've ever mentioned her. Sookie will even tell you we were taking the same flight home."

"Fine!" Godric shouted back and flung his arms into the air before storming out of the airport. Neither brother realized that they'd created an audience, and as Godric left, Eric became uncomfortably aware of his spectators.

"Uh," Claudine waved nervously. "Claude's on his way. My mother said he left a while ago. Maybe he got caught up in traffic."

"I'm sorry about that," Eric sighed before throwing a glare at the gawkers and making the group break apart and continue on their own journeys.

"Seriously, what's wrong with your brother?" Claudine asked worriedly.

"I don't want to talk about it," Eric stated quickly, making Claudine nod slowly in acceptance.

Claudine suddenly shook her head and laughed, "I guess I'll have to ask Claude if he'll give you a ride home, huh?"

Eric grimaced, "I could call Sookie to pick me up."

"Aw, don't be stupid," Claudine smirked as she pushed her friend toward the exit. "You can just buy us dinner. Besides, I'd like to meet the girl you never shut up about."

Groaning to himself, Eric let himself be shoved out of the airport to wait for his friend's brother.

"I'm sorry my brother made such a scene," Eric told her as they stood outside.

"It's cool. Believe me, my brother and I know _all_ about the family making a scene," Claudine rolled her eyes. "My Uncle Dermot has a step-daughter named Sophie-Anne and step-son named André. Dermot's wife isn't so bad to be around, but her daughter and son are impossible."

"Oh yeah?" Eric turned his head toward Claudine curiously. "Come on, tell me. Make me feel better about the situation," He nudged her playfully.

"Okay, so," Claudine took a deep breath, "my grandpa has three kids: Dermot, Fintan and my father Dillon. My dad was a huge surprise; they thought grandma was going through menopause, not pregnancy. She was almost fifty. So, there's a twenty-five-year gap between my dad and Uncle Fintan.

"Uncle Dermot," she continued, "wanted kids of his own but Josephine said she was done having kids. Grandpa was cool, treated his step-grandkids just like me and my brother. Uncle Fintan never had any kids."

"This is sounding a lot less interesting than I was hoping," Eric frowned.

"Hold on, hold on," Claudine encouraged. "So, grandpa let Uncle Dermot take over his company, and Uncle Dermot hired Sophie-Anne and André when they were old enough. Now money keeps going missing. Sophie-Anne's department is hundreds of thousands of dollars overdrawn, and grandpa Niall is beside himself. Now he's pressuring me to get my degree in business so he has _some_ hope of protecting the company."

"What about your brother?" Eric asked.

"Eric, my brother is a gay stripper in Monroe," Claudine looked at her friend in exasperation. "Believe me when I say that he has no desire to run Elfyria."

"Talking about me behind my back, Claudine?"

Eric looked up to see a tall, lean man approaching them. Like his sister, Claude had dark hair and eyes. He held himself like a model, and Eric couldn't help but amuse himself by agreeing that women and probably men alike would enjoy seeing him naked.

"You must be Claude," Eric shook the man's hand.

"And you must join me for dinner some time," Claude grinned salaciously.

"Sorry, I'm taken," Eric laughed. "But my fiancée and I would happily feed you and your sister any time."

"Your friend didn't strike me as a suck up," Claude stated pointedly to his sister.

"He needs a ride home to Bon Temps. I think he's trying to play nice," Claudine laughed as they walked toward the airport parking lot.

When the trio arrived at Claude's car, Eric found himself trying to puzzle out something he hadn't realized was a mystery until now.

"Did you say your grandfather is the founder of Elfyria?" Eric asked as he slid into the backseat while the siblings took the front.

"Yes," Claudine could not disguise the hesitation in her response.

"Elfyria Mergers and Acquisitions?" Eric pressed.

"Yes," Claude grumbled. "So what?"

"The founder's name is Niall Brigant, right?" Eric asked.

"That's our grandfather alright," Claude replied impatiently.

"So, if he had all sons, why is your last name Crane?" Eric wondered.

"It's our mother's maiden name," Claudine explained softly.

Before Eric could ponder further, he stopped and considered the possibility that the difference in their last name from the rest of the family might be a sensitive topic. Deciding that it was none of his business, Eric instead shrugged and said, "Oh, okay," and left the conversation at that.

The tension in the car slowly dissipated, but the conversation was still a bit awkward the remainder of the way to Bon Temps. When they arrived in front of the Stackhouse farm, Eric asked them to wait so he could introduce his friend to his fiancée.

Eric's long legs launched himself from the car and bounded over the steps to the back door near the kitchen. When his arms flung the door open, Sookie jumped in her seat in surprise at her fiancé standing by the fridge.

"Eric!" Sookie yelped as she leaped from her seat and wrapped her arms around Eric's middle.

"Hey, Sookie," Eric greeted her with a quick kiss. "I want you to meet Claudine. Her brother gave me a ride home."

"Godric?" Sookie inquired as Eric took her by the hand and tugged her out the door.

"What's all the commotion down here?" Jason wondered as he came into the kitchen and grinned at his future brother-in-law. "Eric! Welcome home, man!" He clapped Eric on the shoulder.

"Thanks, Jason," Eric smiled back. "Come with us and meet my friend Claudine and her brother Claude."

Jason nodded and followed the couple outside. Two dark haired and dark eyed beauties stood leaning against the fenders of a nice Pontiac.

Sookie paused, staring at Claudine and let her arm be drawn out by Eric as she gazed unblinkingly.

While Sookie stared at Claudine, the other siblings were staring at Jason.

"Am I missing something here?" Eric wondered as everyone gazed dumbly at one another.

"He just looks strangely familiar," Claude frowned, still appraising Jason.

"Like we've seen him before?" Claudine asked of her brother.

"I-uh- used to be the Bon Temps starting QB?" Jason offered. "And you two, I would definitely remember."

"We never played against Bon Temps," Claude frowned. "Do you have any family in Monroe?"

"My Great-great-grandparents on my Gran's side were from there," Jason offered. "Our Great Uncle lived out there too for a while, but no one's seen him since…" Jason trailed off as he looked back at Sookie apologetically. He was surprised to see tears streaming down his sister's face. "Sook, what's wrong?" Jason asked worriedly and it was then that Eric turned to see his fiancée's distress.

"I don't remember," Sookie choked quietly and wiped her eyes as if suddenly realizing she was crying.

"You don't remember why you were crying?" Eric asked gently.

Sookie shook her head, "No." She hiccuped and then wiped her nose with the back of her hand as she turned back toward the house. "Sorry," she mumbled as she headed back to the kitchen.

"We didn't mean to upset Sookie, " Claudine worried her lip between her teeth.

Eric barely heard Claudine's concerned statement as he turned back to the house. As he peeked into the kitchen, the young man found his fiancée sitting at the kitchen table, peeling an apple with intense concentration.

"Hey," Eric greeted carefully. "Are you alright?"

"Her face," Sookie began slowly, her knife pausing its work at removing the crimson skin of the fruit. The curly tail trembled, betraying Sookie's worries. "Her face… It made my chest hurt."

Eric sat beside Sookie and took the knife and apple from her. Godric's accusations and warnings thundered in his ears. "You know that Claudine is only a friend of mine, right?"

Sookie looked up at Eric in surprise. "I'm not jealous, " she assured. "I don't know what it is I feel exactly, but I'm not scared of her taking you. You'd never write to me the way you do if she had that effect on you."

Eric marveled at the way Sookie could now speak. It was still a novelty to hear her voice, and the fluidity of her complete statements floored him. How far she had come in just a few weeks! Sookie's speech had healed far faster than her arm.

"Besides," Sookie finally took up the fruit and knife to resume peeling her apple as the pulpy flesh began to tinge brown, "even if you were attracted to her, you'd never introduce her to me if you had that on your mind. You're not a sadist."

Eric relaxed at her point and finally sat with her at the kitchen table. "You really don't know what's wrong, do you?"

Sookie shook her head, "No, I don't. It doesn't make any sense to me."

"Does she seem familiar?" Eric asked.

The young woman shrugged. "In that way that anyone could seem familiar? Like when I'd go shopping with the family and I'd wander away. So many women would look like my mama, but only for that brief moment," she tried to explain.

Sookie's fingers wiggled to rotate the apple against the knife her restricted hand was holding stationary until the curly tail fell off and she began to eat the fruit thoughtfully.

{†}

"So," Claude cleared his throat uncomfortably, "we should probably get going. I know our parents are waiting for me to bring Claudine home."

"Yeah, sorry everything got so weird," Jason chuckled. "Sookie still gets a little hesitant around strangers, so maybe that's why she got all weepy."

"Eric told me about her voice," Claudine smiled sympathetically. "It's just awful what she went through."

Jason nodded sadly, "Yeah, but she's tough in her own ways. She tries not to hold onto things now."

"Maybe we'll drop by again sometime soon, but actually announce ourselves beforehand," Claudine suggested.

"Yeah, sure," Jason nodded, hoping that the two wouldn't stare at him so confused the next time they decided to drop in.

{†}

"Sookie," Eric began suddenly, "there's something I've been meaning to talk to you about."

"What's that?" Sookie wondered.

"It has a lot to do with why Godric and Pam were really against the two of us dating at first," Eric explained slowly. "Hell, maybe it has a lot to do with the way I used to act, too."

Sookie rose to clean the paring knife in the sink as she considered the possibilities. "Will it make you feel better to talk about it with me, or do you think it's something I _have_ to know?"

Eric sighed and leaned his head back tiredly, "I thought after you and I made it through so much, Godric would have more faith in us… In me. Since he doesn't seem to want to let it go, it would make me feel better if you knew as much of the story as I know."

"Does Godric know the whole story?" Sookie asked.

"He wouldn't listen to me about that night even if I tied him to a chair and screamed it into a bullhorn," Eric laughed. "Besides, I doubt he'd believe me about it if I _did_ get him to listen."

"Well, I can't absolve you of something between you and your brother," Sookie pointed out. "If you need to talk about it or get it out, I'll listen, but the only way to fix things with your brother is to talk to _him_ about it."

Eric groaned, "I know."

"Am I still going to spend the week at Rosenfont with you?" Sookie asked now that she knew things weren't so great between the siblings.

"Of course you are," Eric grinned and pulled Sookie into his lap. "Why would you think otherwise?"

"Well, if there's going to be blood in the Northman Household, I thought I might stay away," Sookie teased.

"There is a possibility of some shouting and cursing, but you're going to be a Northman soon. Besides, I want you nearby to help me calm down if things take a turn for the worst," Eric's arms tightened briefly around her waist.

"Oh, is that what this is all about?" Sookie laughed as she leaned over him and stole a kiss.

"No," Eric confessed, "I mostly can't bear the idea of not waking up next to you every chance I get."

{†}

"Claude?" Claudine murmured as she stared at the passing scenery as the twins drove home to Monroe.

"Yeah?" Her brother's voice felt as preoccupied as her own mind.

"I'm not crazy, right?" Claudine wondered aloud. "Jason Stackhouse _does_ look insanely familiar, right?"

"Yeah," Claude agreed. "It's weird. I feel like I saw him ages ago just how he is now."

"Didn't he say his grandmother had family in Monroe?" Claudine remembered.

"You're right!" Claude grinned. "Maybe we've seen a picture of his family somewhere?"

"I can't think of anywhere we've looked at old pictures… Other than Grandpa's house," Claudine realized. "Mom only keeps pictures of us in the house."

"Do you want to stop by Grandpa's before going home?" Claude suggested as they pulled onto the highway at last.

"Yes, otherwise I'll go crazy trying to figure out whom Jason reminds me of!" Claudine howled playfully, making her brother laugh.

{†}

"Come on, Sookie," Eric tugged at his fiancée's arm as he lifted her duffle bag over his shoulder. "Sorry, we'll have to walk since Godric's being a dick."

Sookie shook her head amusedly as they strolled the familiar path up the road to Rosenfont Hall.

When they arrived at the old plantation, Sookie gave pause when she saw Tara and Pam sitting together on the porch swing, drinking iced tea. "Hi-i," Sookie waved at the pair, her voice trembling a bit with surprise.

"Heya, Sook," Tara greeted with her own wave.

"Is Godric home?" Eric asked of Pam as the couple walked up the steps to the porch.

"No," Pam frowned. "He hasn't come home at all. I figured you three were hanging at the Stackhouses'."

Eric sighed and shook his head, "He saw me get off the plane with my friend Claudine, accused me of cheating on Sookie and then abandoned me at the airport. Claudine's brother had to drive me to Sookie's."

Pam raised her eyebrows. "Jeez. He's not very subtle anymore, is he?"

"No, he's not," Eric agreed tiredly.

"Well, you reap what you sew," Pam reminded. "Your word when it comes to girls is garbage to him."

"I know what he thinks and why, but he needs to let it go," Eric grumbled.

"Maybe he would have if you hadn't broken your promise and fucked his crush," Pam pointed out. Eric's shoulders tightened. "Can you blame him for not trusting your word? You said you wouldn't do it out of respect for him, and then you got trashed and did it."

" _That_ is _not_ the story," Eric scowled.

"So what is the story?" Tara sipped at her tea, raising her eyebrows at Eric curiously.

Eric paused, looked at Sookie and then remained silent.

"None of your fucking business," Eric snapped and dragged Sookie into the house, leaving the girls laughing on the porch.

"Eric," Sookie tugged at his arm carefully, "this doesn't sound at all like what you were hinting at back at my house."

Her fiancé's shoulders slumped, and he turned to meet her eyes. "I don't remember what happened."

"How do you mean?" Sookie was very familiar with memory problems.

"I mean, I remember drinking. It was while we were in England, and I was still learning my limits. I remember crawling upstairs to shut my eyes," Eric explained. "I remember waking up with my pants open. The next thing I know, I'm back downstairs at the party, and Naomi's talking about my cock like she knows it. I don't know if we fucked, or she just played with me a bit while I was asleep. I got tested afterward to be safe, but since I don't know, she just got put on my list of twelve, just to be safe."

"Eric," Sookie began slowly, "are you saying you got raped by your brother's crush at a party?"

Her fiancé snorted, "I didn't get _raped_."

"Did you want to have sex?" Sookie demanded.

"Sookie," Eric laughed, "I'm not traumatized or something by it. I don't even remember it-"

"There's a _lot_ of things I don't remember, Eric," Sookie whispered. "I can say for sure they can still hurt you. The body remembers things the mind doesn't sometimes."

Eric paused at her statement and pulled Sookie back into his arms. "I'm at peace with whatever happened, Sookie. I stay in control of my drinking. There's nothing to worry about."

"What happens when you drink too much?" Sookie asked softly.

"Huh?"

"What keeps you from ordering that next drink?" Sookie explained. "How do you know where to stop?"

Eric smiled, "Are you worried I _won't_ become an alcoholic?"

"What does it feel like?" Sookie pressed.

"Agitation," Eric sighed. "I get agitated right before. That's when I know to stop."

Sookie nodded, "Because you feel your sense of control slipping?"

"Probably," Eric released her from the embrace he'd maintained. "Come on. Let's get settled upstairs."

{†}

"Here, this one's pretty old," Fintan Brigant came to the coffee table with a thick, leather-bound photo album.

When Claude and Claudine had arrived at their grandfather's house, they weren't surprised to be told by the maid that Grandpa Niall was resting. They were, however, pleasantly surprised to find their Uncle Fintan all too happy to help them on their quest for old pictures.

"It would help if you had a name," Fintan hinted.

"We don't know Jason's grandmother's maiden name," Claudine explained as she kept flipping through the album. "Ugh, this is just a bunch of super old baby pictures! We need pictures from around grandpa's prime!"

"I think most of those would be dust by now," Fintan joked as he rose to look for another album.

"Wait!" Claude shouted. "This guy! Who are these guys!?" His finger jabbed at the plastic laminate that protected the old photo.

Fintan sighed and returned to the coffee table to laugh. "Who do you think it is? That's your dad," he pointed to the baby. "That's me," he gestured to a young man with his arms crossed over his chest and smirking. "And that's your Uncle Dermot," he pointed at the man holding the infant Dillon. "Why?"

"The guy we met today looked like the _spitting image_ of Uncle Dermot," Claude told him.

"I'm sure you're exaggerating," Fintan shrugged. "Are you happy now? Mystery solved?"

"I suppose," Claudine frowned. "I suppose I could ask Eric to ask Mrs. Stackhouse what her maiden name was-"

"What name did you say?" Fintan interrupted.

"Stackhouse," Claudine repeated.

"Adele Stackhouse?" Fintan demanded impatiently.

"I don't know," Claudine confessed. "I just know the granddaughter's name is Sookie."

"Where do they live?" Fintan asked while simultaneously heading for the door.

{†}

"Damn, it's quite the day for visitors," Jason grumbled as he saw a dust cloud coming up the gravel driveway.

"Watch your language, Jason," Adele snapped at her grandson while she worked in her garden.

"Yes, Gran," the young man huffed as he went back to working on the lawn mower that had been giving him a hard time all week.

As the strange car rolled to a stop, Adele finally rocked back to her feet to greet the unexpected company. What she didn't anticipate was to be transported nearly fifty years into the past.

The gentleman that exited the car might have been in his late sixties, but to Adele Stackhouse, he was still the handsome boy she had spent her summers with on her grandparents' farm. Fintan Brigant was still the man who had stolen her heart but had been forbidden to give her his own.

"Fintan," Adele's voice trembled.

"Hi, Addy," Fintan smiled gently.

Jason stared between the elderly before politely excusing himself. He didn't miss the way the stranger, Fintan, watched him leave.

"Addy," Fintan began slowly, acknowledging the family resemblance first hand, "is that boy my own?"

Adele nodded slowly, "He's your grandson."

"Does he know?"

Shaking her head, Adele confessed, "They have no idea."

"Was it his father or his mother that was mine?" Fintan lowered his voice.

"His father," Adele felt entranced as a forty-five-year-old secret was finally spilled from her lips.

Fintan took a deep, long breath. He had a son. Somewhere he had a son.

"Addy," Fintan's voice changed suddenly. It became cold. "Where is your brother?"

"Bartlett? I don't know. Why?" Adele replied dazedly, jarred from her amorous memories by Fintan's abrupt mood swing.

"No one's ever come asking about him? Maybe eight and a half years ago?" Fintan's voice became harsher, and Adele bristled in annoyance.

"Eight years ago?" She snapped. "If someone came asking about my brother eight years ago, I wouldn't have had the time of day to tell them."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Fintan snarled back.

"Eight and a half years ago is when my… _Our_ son was killed in a car accident!" Adele told him sharply and she saw the shock on Fintan's face. "The accident killed his wife, and almost took our granddaughter too."

Fintan leaned heavily against his car. "Is she alright now?"

"She's fine," Adele replied, calming down slowly and taking a moment to reflect. "Now that I'm stopping to think about it; yes. Someone did come by looking for Bartlett. It was while I was in the hospital with Sookie. They said they wanted to ask him about a little girl that had gone missing near the lake he lived on. He wanted to know if Bartlett might have seen someone out there. I told him I hadn't seen my brother since the morning of the car accident when I left him to watch Sookie so I could run some errands."

Fintan's body tensed once more, "Bartlett was under investigation for the abduction of Claudette Brigant."

"Your daughter!?" Adele cried.

"My niece," Fintan shook his head. "She was one of Dillon's triplets."

"I'm sorry, Fintan," Adele crooned sadly.

Fintan waved off her apology, "You don't seem surprised by my accusations."

"I have it on pretty good authority that he was hurting another little girl," Adele couldn't bring herself to say it was their Hadley that had enlightened her. "It was too late for me to do anything about once I knew. He'd already been missing for months."

"Did you ever ask Sookie where your brother went?" Fintan asked.

"She doesn't remember the accident, Fintan, or most of the day leading up to it," Adele explained. "I'm sorry." She couldn't find it in her to share her suspicions about what had become of her brother.

"I wish I could have known my son," Fintan ran his hand through his hair, feeling suddenly tired.

"You still have time to know your daughter," Adele told him tentatively.

"I have a daughter, too?" Fintan asked in surprise.

"Yes," Adele nodded, "and a second granddaughter."

Fintan ran his hands into his hair again, "Did I knock you up _every_ time?"

"No, just the two times," Adele felt the old, familiar flush only Fintan could bring to her cheeks. It had been so long…

"Is that why you stopped coming by?" Fintan asked sadly. "Because you'd gotten everything you needed out of me?"

Adele frowned and walked slowly over to the car. As she leaned against the hood, she again felt time melt away as her hand laid over that of the first love of her life. "I loved my husband, Fintan. He was a wonderful father to our children, but I knew what your father would do if he found out they were yours. He'd practically buy them from me and ship them off to boarding school. I took solace in the pieces of you that the Lord let me have, and the completion you gave my family."

"You hid them from me," Fintan squeezed Adele's hand, "but you were right to do so."

"I'm sorry," Adele choked. "It wasn't fair for me to take so much and give nothing."

"You gave me a lot, Addy," Fintan assured her. "You gave me your heart, and I've always cherished that."

"Lord, I have no idea how I'm going to explain to my child and grandchildren that I was an adulteress," Adele moaned.

Fintan brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles gently, "You won't have to do it alone, Addy."

{†}

"Sookie," Eric sighed with frustration, "I'm finished discussing this!" The topic of Naomi had followed them all the way from the foyer to his bedroom, and he was exhausted from it.

"How can you be finished?" Sookie demanded. "You just admitted that you were assaulted and-"

"And nothing," Eric retorted impatiently. "It's over, and even if I explained it to Godric, he wouldn't believe me. If by some miracle he _did_ , he'd think I'd brought it upon myself anyway. Just drop it. I got what I deserved."

"What if it was me?" Sookie crossed her arms over her chest defiantly.

Pressing his hands against his eyes in fatigue, Eric growled, "It wasn't you, and if it had been, it would be different."

"How so?"

"Because you would care that it happened. Obviously, _I_ would be out for blood," Eric remarked.

"I care that someone did that to you," Sookie closed the distance between them and took Eric's hands in her own.

"Does it change how you feel about me?" Eric demanded.

"Of course not!" Sookie replied without hesitation.

"Then let it be, Sookie," Eric pleaded. "It was almost four years ago, and if you still feel you can be with me after knowing, then I'm happy to leave it in the past."

"If you ever want to talk about it, I'm here," Sookie told him.

Choosing not to argue and rehash the discussion, Eric answered, "Thank you."

In reality, Eric did have his wounds from the experience, and some of the scars were still pink and painful. At the party, he had been too drunk still to fully comprehend what had happened, and by the time he'd gotten home and eventually sobered up; it was too late for him to do damage control.

Drinking became something he partook in to avoid people asking more questions. He made sure to nurse a single beer throughout the night but surreptitiously pour it out along the way so he could crack open a fresh one now and again. Eric had mastered the art of appearing mildly buzzed and purposefully scoffed at the notion of competitive drinking.

"Sookie," Eric tugged his fiancée back to his side when she moved to begin opening her duffle bag.

"Hmm?" She looked back curiously.

"The whole jumping from girl to girl thing," Eric began slowly. "It's possible I was doing that because I was angry, or maybe because I didn't trust women after Naomi did what she did. She threw a wrecking ball at my relationship with my brother, and I couldn't forgive that." When Sookie wrapped her comforting arms around him, Eric let out a sigh. "I still don't want to tell Godric."

"Okay," Sookie squeezed him a bit tighter. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to do." She sensed that the topic was closed once and for all for the evening, and she held him a bit longer before pulling away. "I'm going to unpack some of my stuff and then start on dinner."

"You don't have to cook for us," Eric chuckled.

"I want to," Sookie assured as she began taking her toiletries out to put in Eric's bathroom. She hung her clothes in his closet and placed a few items in his drawers. With any luck, they could stay curled up in Rosenfont for the entire week of Spring Break until they had to return to the Stackhouse farm for Easter.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Twenty-Two: Nightmares**

" _No! No," the little girl screeched as her wrist was clutched in a strong but withering hand. "Let go! Daaadd-eeeey!" Her little feet tried to dig into the narrow floorboards and resist the urgency that she was dragged behind that wiry old arm._

" _I said to move it!" a gruff voice snarled at the small child and she looked up at the shadowed face. Her eyes couldn't make out his expression as his hand released her wrist and took a fistful of her hair into his clutches._

" _Ow, no! Let go!" the girl screamed._

A door opened, and an old, tan town car sat waiting with the sunlight winking off its silver mirrors. The girl kicked and struggled, but subsequently gave lesser efforts on account of the control the overbearing beast had on her hair.

Tiny feet dragged and kicked across the gravel. Cries and sobs rang from her mouth that put out so much fearful noise. White socks turned gray and brown in the struggle as the girl called over and over for her daddy.

" _SOOKIE!"_

"Sookie!" Eric's body jerked away as his fiancée's fist swung out in her sleep and managed to clip against his chest. "Sookie, what's wrong?" Eric demanded as he watched her big eyes blink at him in the light coming from the lamp on the bedside table. "Were you having a nightmare?" Her dazed expression told him that she was still trapped in the awkward land between dream and reality and he waited until he saw the remaining fog lift from her face. "Are you alright?"

"I'm sorry," Sookie mumbled.

"It's okay. Everyone has bad dreams," Eric smiled. "What was it about?"

The same glaze he had seen that afternoon as Sookie stared at Claudine clouded Sookie's eyes. "I don't remember."

"You called for your dad," Eric tried to prompt a memory and was surprised when Sookie clutched painfully at her head. "Sookie?" He stroked her hair soothingly. "I'm sorry, don't think about it."

Sookie swallowed hard as she nodded and squeezed her eyes shut. As the dark enclosed around her, she could still see Claudine's face. Young, gray and terrified. Sookie's eyes snapped open and she rolled onto her side. Eric's arms followed her, and he held her body tightly to his own.

Soon she could hear Eric's breathing even out as he drifted back into sleep. Sookie, however, remained staring, unblinkingly at the shadowy wall.

Dead, gray eyes were staring at her and Sookie shivered.

"Mmm, got you," Eric muttered sleepily and his arms tightened again.

Sookie closed her eyes.

" _Daddy," her little hand cupped over her mouth as she shivered beneath the bed. She stifled the involuntary cry as she could hear footsteps hurrying to the room she chose as her hiding spot._

" _Got ya!" a pale, narrow claw of a hand clutched at the girl's ankle and dragged her from beneath the bed frame. The child screamed shrilly as she slid along her belly across the floor, but as the man tried to gain a better hold on her, she managed to scurry between his legs and out the bedroom door._

The girl's flute-like voice became a piercing note through the house as she tried to scamper out into the sunlight, to hide out in the woods or beneath the back porch.

Before she could make it to the door, the little girl felt her arm wrenched back, and she let out a sharp cry. The girl felt a sense of deja vu as she was dragged through the house, crying and trying to dig in her heels. When she was forced across the gravel driveway, she could hear her name being shouted. She looked towards the sound of her name, she stared into the tremendous light of the sun that darkened her savior's features as the man clutching her wrist raised his free hand. The girl watched as a tire iron flailed over and over in the air and arcs of blood splattered the old brown Town Car.

Looking down at the fallen attacker, the girl watched as the last of the light faded from his old eyes. Those old, dead eyes stared at her like a conquest that would always be chased. Even as death clouded over, she felt like that stare would loom over her for the rest of eternity

Sookie snapped awake, the image of her nightmare still burned into her mind. Eric lay asleep beside her, and Sookie glanced at the clock to see it was only 4AM. Since the idea of sleep seemed impossible, she got out of bed and went into the living room to use the telephone.

" _Hello?"_ a groggy voice grumbled, an unfamiliar woman's voice.

"Dr. Broadway?" Sookie hiccupped.

" _Mia, it's one of your patients,"_ the unhappy voice said.

" _Hello?"_ Dr. Broadway answered.

"Dr. Broadway, it's Sookie," Sookie whispered shakily.

" _Sookie? What's wrong?"_

" _I thought this shit wouldn't happen if I dated a therapist whose patients were all deaf and shit,"_ the annoyed voice from earlier grumbled.

" _Get out of here then,"_ Amelia snapped. " _Sookie, what's wrong?"_

"I'm having really bad nightmares. I can't sleep at all," Sookie told her. "All the sudden out of nowhere."

" _What kind of nightmares?"_ Amelia asked patiently.

"About a girl getting dragged through a house, and a dead girl, and an old man, and a tire iron and-"

" _Okay, hold on,"_ Amelia was sounding more alert. " _Are you observing the dream or are you one of the people in it?"_

"I'm the girl getting dragged through the house," Sookie choked, "and the dead girl looks just like this girl who's friends with Eric, and I only ever see the old man's arms and eyes."

" _Who has the tire iron?"_ Amelia wondered.

"I don't know," Sookie whispered.

" _Sookie, do you know the house you were being dragged through?"_ Amelia asked.

"Mine. I mean, Gran's," Sookie answered. "At least it's the only place I've seen the wallpaper, but it seems weird."

" _Big_?" Amelia guessed.

"Yes."

" _Okay,"_ Amelia paused to think. " _Take two of your prescription, get some more sleep, and I'm going to schedule you for an emergency appointment for today."_

"But it's Sunday," Sookie protested. "Your office isn't open."

" _I'm going to come to you,"_ Amelia told her. " _You said the dream happened in your Gran's house. We're going to meet there."_

"Really?" Sookie was confused, but Amelia didn't want to hypothesize over the phone.

Since Adele Stackhouse had first brought her granddaughter in as Amelia's client, the old woman had shared a frightening suspicion. Adele believed her brother had molested Sookie the day of the car accident. She speculated that perhaps Sookie had even witnessed a murder, but no one knew for sure. With the information Amelia was now receiving, the therapist couldn't help but worry that Adele's gut had been right about everything.

" _Get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow at your Gran's at noon."_

Sookie hung up the phone with a goodbye and stared out the window a moment. She didn't want to sleep. She didn't want to take a double dose of her medication. Instead, she sat staring out the window as it turned from black to gray, to pink.

"You look terrible," Eric commented worriedly as he came into the living room. He felt his fiancée's forehead. "Are you feeling sick? You don't feel warm-"

"I'm fine," Sookie whispered. "I just didn't sleep well."

"Sookie?"

"I had another nightmare," Sookie told him.

"Do you remember it this time?"

"Yes," Sookie nodded. "I called Amelia."

Eric's eyebrows rose with surprise. "It was that bad?"

Sookie nodded. "Amelia thinks so too. She's coming to Gran's house at noon to have an emergency session."

"What the hell did you dream?" Eric asked in awe.

"I don't want to talk about it right now. I want to make breakfast for us, have some coffee and ignore what I dreamt for a bit."

Eric could only nod at her decision. Part of him was concerned Sookie would forget the dream before she could talk to Amelia again. Another side of him was terrified that a dream had influenced Sookie so strongly that she had called her therapist at home before daybreak.

While Sookie rose from her seat in the living room and headed for the kitchen, Eric followed and placed his hand on her hip. When her body pulled away in a flinch, her future husband could only let his hand drop helplessly to his side. Sookie gave an apologetic grimace and hurried the remainder of the way to the kitchen. She couldn't figure out how to explain how her dream had made her feel. Any touch to her skin felt like that pale, clawing hand.

Relief arrived in the form of Pam. Eric's sister strolled into the kitchen, grabbed a plate of eggs that Sookie was handing her and pit stopped for a cup of coffee.

"I guess Godric crawled in around one this morning," Pam announced. "I don't know the last time he stayed out so late." Eric rolled his eyes. "That Claudine must be one hell of a hottie to get Godric that paranoid about you."

Sookie set the skillet down loudly and glared at her best friend. "I'd rather you not insinuate about that story again."

Pam raised her eyebrows at Sookie's ferocity. "Really? Then he told you about it?"

"He did," Sookie began cracking more eggs into a bowl and whisking out her frustration.

"He really has changed since then," Pam assured. "I mean, he went through a lot of girls right after he cashed his V-Card in with Naomi, but I never saw him go back on a promise ever again."

Sookie paused in her whisking and looked at Pam in confusion before she realized that her friend obviously didn't know about Freyda. Shaking off the impulse to correct Pam's misunderstanding, Sookie went back to cooking breakfast.

Pam slowly chewed her breakfast as she watched Sookie's body language. If there was one thing she knew better than anyone about Sookie, it was that she had no poker face. Eric liked to think he was the champion of interpreting Sookie, but Pam knew the real truth.

Although Sookie kept a distance, she was defensive, but not about her relationship. She was being protective of Eric. The real question was why she cared to protect him from a mistake coming up on five years old.

The tension in the room only amplified when Godric arrived, and the hush it brought was palpable.

Godric silently declined eggs and had nothing more than a cup of coffee. When her offerings were refused, Sookie took her plate to the table and sat among the siblings in the uncomfortable quiet. When her heart couldn't take the anger any longer, Sookie reached over and took Eric's hand comfortingly.

"I don't like your sense of pity, Godric," Sookie announced.

The oldest Northman looked up in surprise at Sookie's words. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm actually insulted that you're pretending to pity me just so you can attack your brother," Sookie replied harshly.

"Sookie, you don't understand my feelings," Godric tried to interrupt.

"I don't care about your feelings, Godric. I'm just telling you that if you want to be rude to him, don't do it under the guise of worrying over me," Sookie demanded, feeling Eric's hand tighten around hers.

Godric frowned at Sookie's uncharacteristic accusation. It wasn't often that his future sister-in-law became so vehement, and the oldest sibling had to wonder about his own feelings.

In reality, it wasn't just Naomi that had caused such a rift in Godric's trust in his brother. The most obvious cause was nearly a year before that incident. When Eric had gone through his growth spurt and suddenly towered over him. Godric remembered all the talk about how Eric had gotten the "good genes" and poor Godric was such a shrimp. No one cared that Godric could do more weights on the leg press or bench more. All they cared about were his brother's blond hair and blue eyes, all they saw was the extra ten inches in height.

When the rumor about Naomi spread through the school like a brushfire, it had succeeded in finally giving Godric a tangible reason to resent and distrust his brother. Finally, Godric had the leverage to hold over Eric's head and feel like the older brother by controlling him through guilt.

It wasn't healthy, and Godric knew it, but facing the reality of his anger would force him to acknowledge that he was petty and immature.

Sookie could see something wanting to break through. There had been times in her life that she could sense others wanted to speak to her if only no one else had to witness their presumed weakness.

"Pam, let's go eat in the dining room," Sookie suggested hoarsely as she rose, squeezed Eric's shoulder and dragged a confused Pam out of the kitchen.

"You told her you didn't sleep with Naomi," Godric guessed once the brothers were alone. It felt obvious after seeing Sookie become so protective of Eric. For the first time, Godric suspected Eric was capable of lying to his fiancé.

"I told her that I don't know," Eric choked.

That response made the older brother pause. "What do you mean you don't know?" A creeping horror was snaking up through his guts at Eric's reply and his resentment was momentarily snuffed.

Eric stared at his coffee as his voice became softer. He didn't trust that Sookie managed to drag his sister completely out of earshot, and there was still shame in him. "I got trashed at that party. I passed out for a bit upstairs. When I woke up, I was still pretty drunk and my pants were open. At first, I figured I'd undone them when I'd flopped in the bed. I zipped back up and went downstairs. Everyone at the party was clapping me on the back telling me good job landing Naomi, but I had no idea what they were talking about. I only know as much as Naomi told everyone."

Godric steepled his hands in front of his face as he tried to find some words to process this new information. There was a part of him that wanted to continue believing Eric had betrayed him, but his brother had never denied a thing. Eric hadn't once tried to refuse that something had happened, and Godric was damned certain that he wouldn't come up with a story like this. Pretending to be a victim was not Eric's style. This knowledge twisted at Godric's gut.

"Naomi raped you?" the older brother finally asked in a strangled query.

The younger brother made a noise in his throat, "I'm not sure, and can we not call it that?"

"What the fuck am I supposed to call it?" Godric demanded weakly. He could feel the blood draining from his limbs to boil in his stomach. His throat was raw with an emotion he couldn't comprehend. "I thought you were this womanizing asshole the past four years, and it was all because you'd been hurt and couldn't talk to anyone about it!" Tears suddenly sprung from Godric's eyes as the full weight of his resentment became apparent.

He'd left his brother to suffer all alone because he felt inadequate by comparison. Eric made him feel like less of a man, and because of that, Godric had let himself believe the worst in him.

"How were you supposed to know? Would you have believed me if I'd told you before I proved I wasn't entirely what you thought I was?" Eric wondered. "If Sookie hadn't given you doubt, would you believe me right now?"

"I hated and loved you equally up until recently," Godric admitted. "I loved you because you're my brother and you always had my back. Still, I _hated_ you because you were tall and handsome. Every girl I ever liked fell immediately in love with you. Once you grew up, I didn't have a chance with the girls at school."

"I'm sorry," Eric told him, still staring at his coffee.

Godric shook his head in frustration. "I'm not looking for an apology. I'm looking for forgiveness."

Eric looked up in surprise, "I was never mad at you."

"How could you not be mad at me?" Godric asked.

"Because if I hadn't gotten so drunk, none of it would have happened," Eric explained. When Godric tried to protest, Eric raised his hand to silence him. "It doesn't matter. You know the truth now and so do I. I'm marrying the woman of my dreams in a few months and will be off the market forever. The first thing you can tell a girl you're interested in about your family is that your brother is married and so in love with his wife."

Godric smiled briefly. "We're just going to forget about it?"

"No, I don't think we'll be able to forget it. I guess we'll just accept it and move on," Eric sighed. "It's a concept Sookie introduced me to."

"So, were you over the pain when you met Sookie or did Sookie take the pain away?" Eric wondered.

"I'd accepted the pain before Sookie," Eric told him. "Mom getting sick had mostly to do with it. If there was a woman as patient and forgiving as Mom out there, I figured there was another. When Mom died, I realized I had to be a better person if I wanted a woman like Mom."

"Our father landed her," Godric pointed out.

"Dad," Eric began, catching Godric's attention with the use of the term 'dad', "was faithful and completely in love with her. I never doubted that. He didn't know how to be a father and I didn't like him much, but I think he did the best he could. What I loved about him was how much he loved our mom."

Godric sat silently contemplating Eric's words. Their father had been distant most of the time and demanding the rest of it. What the oldest Northman couldn't argue was that there was never a doubt in his head or heart that Frank had loved Alice with everything he had in him.

"You do deserve Sookie, you know that, right?" Godric told him.

Eric let out a long breath. "I've felt that I do, but it's good to hear from you."

"I'm sorry I haven't been more supportive of you. I've just been fucking up every step of the way it seems."

"No, you've just been lost like Pam and me. You went from being an older brother to a guardian, and it couldn't have been easy, " Eric smiled slightly before leaning back in his chair. "And if it'll make you feel better; I do forgive you. I don't think there's anything to forgive, but you seem to."

"Thank you."

{†}

Shortly before noon, Eric walked back to the Stackhouse farm with Sookie to meet up with Dr. Broadway. When they came up the long, gravel driveway, Sookie was surprised to see an unfamiliar car parked near the kitchen door.

"Is the doc already here?" Eric wondered aloud as they hopped up the pair of steps and came in through the kitchen. They were surprised to see an older man talking with Adele, but they were stunned silent at the conversation.

"They're my grandchildren, too, Addy!" Fintan snapped in frustration.

"Maybe we should have called, " Eric interrupted the argument.

Adele looked up at her granddaughter and let out a groan. "Sookie, why are you home so soon?"

"Gra-an, " Sookie struggled to speak in front of the stranger, "who is thi-is?"

Adele remained silent a moment before uttering, "Your grandfather."

Sookie blinked in surprise. "Grampa Mo-oore?"

Adele shook her head, "Not your mother's father. This is the man that fathered your daddy and aunt."

Eric felt his body trying to pull away and escape back out the kitchen door. In fact, he would have gladly jumped out the second story window to avoid this.

Sookie's nails scratched nervously against her cast before she managed to choke out, "You cheated!" After the accusation was flung, Sookie spun on her heel and ran out of the house.

The distraught young woman didn't make it far as a newer Chevy began bouncing up the driveway, carrying Dr. Amelia Broadway.

"Sookie, where are you going?" Amelia asked as she slid from her seat and approached her crying patient.

"Gran cheated on my grampa!" Sookie hiccuped.

"You had another dream?" Amelia tried to understand.

"No, there's a man in our kitchen, and Gran says he's my daddy's real father!" Sookie explained hurriedly.

"Oh no, " Amelia frowned and patted Sookie's back soothingly. "This definitely could have come at a better time."

Before Sookie could protest, she was being guided back into the house. Gran was surprised to see Amelia.

"Dr. Broadway, what are you doing here?" Adele asked.

"Sookie called me this morning. She didn't tell you?"

"She was staying with me while I'm home for Spring Break, " Eric injected before glancing nervously at Fintan who seemed to bristle at the news.

"Can someone please tell me what is going on?" Fintan demanded as the conversation accelerated around him.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Amelia asked of the older man.

"I am Fintan Brigant. I am Sookie's real grandfather," Fintan explained.

Eric froze for a moment, "You're Claude and Claudine's uncle?"

"Yes," Fintan frowned. "They dropped by my father's house yesterday to look at old photo albums. Jason looks remarkably similar to my brother Dermot when he was younger. My niece and nephew were trying to figure out where they'd seen Jason before."

"That explains the staring contest going on yesterday," Eric smiled before he faltered. "Wait, Sookie, do you think family resemblance might be why you thought you'd seen Claudine before?"

"Stop!" Amelia shouted suddenly, taking everyone by surprise and effectively silencing them. "I am here to help Sookie through something very delicate and difficult. Fintan, you definitely need to go since Sookie has never given me permission to discuss her sessions in front of you."

"I'll go wait in my car," Fintan sighed, and Sookie was momentarily concerned about putting the old man out in a hot vehicle when he'd probably received a pretty big shock.

Once he was gone, Sookie frowned and turned to her Gran. "I want you to go too," Sookie told her, barely keeping the coldness out of her voice.

Adele bowed her head in understanding before leaving the room without objection. The dismayed expression wrenched at Sookie's heart, but the young woman just wasn't ready to deal with the new branch of her family tree just yet.

"Sookie," Amelia gestured to the small kitchen table, "are you alright?"

"The woman I learned the virtue of fidelity from cheated on her husband and got knocked up twice by a man I've never even heard of before," Sookie whispered angrily. "Even after grampa Stackhouse passed away, she never told us."

Amelia nodded patiently, "Sookie, are you going to be able to focus on the reason I came out to see you with everything that's happened in such a short time?"

Sookie nodded slowly, "Yeah. I'd rather not think about Gran right now."

The therapist glanced at Eric before asking, "Do you want Eric to stay?"

"Yes," Sookie took her fiancé's hand. "I'm scared about where that dream came from."

"Why is that?" Amelia asked.

Eric sat quietly beside his future bride and kept himself busy by playing with her hair as he listened. He knew that Sookie would clam up if he stared too intently, and he was well aware that tugging her hair brought her a sense of calm.

"I've had a lot of bad dreams in my life. I know the difference between my dreams and reality when I wake up," Sookie spoke slow and clear. "When I woke up, I didn't know that it was a dream. I was scared it was real."

Eric's hand paused briefly before deciding to focus on braiding the strands and keep his mind from coming up with horrible scenarios.

"You think you were relieving a memory?" Amelia asked.

"Yes," Sookie sucked in a breath, "but I don't know how it pieces together."

"Let's walk through it then," Amelia slowed her down. "What all happened yesterday? Not in your dream, but through your day that was out of the ordinary?"

"I met Claude and Claudine but didn't speak to them. Claudine's face made me uncomfortable. I didn't know why until I was falling asleep," Sookie told her.

"We'll get to that in a second," Amelia pulled her back. "Was Claudine the only thing out of the ordinary yesterday?"

Sookie frowned and turned her head to look at Eric. Their conversation about Naomi was definitely out of the ordinary.

Eric sighed at her expression before admitting, "I told Sookie that there's a chance I was… well… raped, for lack of a better word, a few years ago. I don't remember it if it happened at all, but there's a girl out there claiming she fucked me and I don't know a thing about it," Eric summarized.

Amelia hesitated a moment, "If you want me to help you find a specialist to-"

"For God's sake, I'm fine!" Eric snapped. "Sookie's all the therapy I need. Thank you though," he quickly amended his anger.

"Alright then," Amelia focused back on Sookie. "Those are the only two things out of the norm for yesterday?"

Sookie nodded, "That's all that stands out."

"Then before bed, you said you realized why Claudine upset you?" Amelia prompted.

"It wasn't part of a dream," Sookie began. "I was just closing my eyes, and I could see Claudine in my mind. Only, her features changed as I looked at her. She became younger, and scared to death, and _gray_. Then I fell asleep. I guess I dreamed," she continued. "Eric woke me up, and I don't remember the first dream."

"The dream you do remember," Amelia kept her focused, "you said there was a dead girl?"

"No," Sookie shook her head, "the dead girl is who I saw before I fell asleep."

"So you never saw her in your actual dream?" The doctor clarified.

"Right," Sookie calmed a bit as Eric began braiding small chunks of her hair again. She wondered briefly if he used to do this with Pam when she was little. Not that she would complain, it felt nice and safely intimate.

"What about the man?" Amelia asked. "What did he look like?"

Sookie thought back, "I don't know for sure, his face just never registered to me. I just remember his eyes and his hands. His hands were pale and like claws. His arms were slight but powerful. I'll never forget his eyes as long as I live. They were this blue color, almost gray."

"Do you know about how old he was?" Amelia jotted down notes on her legal pad.

"I don't know," Sookie admitted. "The skin on his arms was looser, but not so delicate looking like an old person. I don't know how old someone is by the skin on their arms."

"What about the skin around his eyes?" Amelia suggested.

Sookie shut her eyes and tried to recall the dream. "Thick crows feet and there was white in his eyebrows. He had creases between his brows like he'd scowled or squinted a lot through his life."

Amelia nodded, "Is there any other details you can help me with?"

The young woman thought harder again, "There was a car… An old brown Town Car. I remember the blood splattering across it."

"Where did the blood come from?" Amelia asked.

"The man was hit with a tire iron. A lot. Blood kept splashing against the car," Sookie whispered as the color drained from her face. "I woke up while he was still being beat over the head with it."

"And where did all of this take place?" Amelia finished.

"I told you it was in this house, but the house was bigger," Sookie told her tiredly.

"Was the house bigger, or were you smaller?" Amelia hinted.

Sookie paused, "You think I'm remembering the day I've forgotten." It wasn't a question, and Amelia's expression softened. "Why am I remembering it all the sudden like that?"

"It could be because your medication or just the series of events that occurred yesterday was enough to trigger the memories," Amelia speculated. "The human mind is not a series of codes that are written the same for every brain. What sparks a memory for one person might be inconsequential for the next.

"With your permission," Amelia continued, "I'd like to discuss some of the elements of your dream with Adele and see if she can fill in the blanks."

"Yeah, okay," Sookie nodded numbly.

As her therapist left the room, Sookie turned to Eric. "Did I witness a murder?"

{†}

"Adele?" Amelia called as she came out onto the porch to find Mrs. Stackhouse and Mr. Brigant waiting silently.

"Yes, Dr. Broadway?" Adele rose from her rocker.

"May I speak to you in private?" Amelia looked pointedly at Fintan.

"Certainly," Fintan took the hint and went to sit in his car.

"What is it, Doctor?" Adele asked worriedly.

"What can you tell me about the day of Sookie's car accident?" Amelia asked.

Adele shivered as the implications of such a request told the old woman everything that she had feared. "My brother was visiting that morning. I had Sookie with me and mentioned her parents were running late to pick her up. I had errands to run and Bartlett said he'd watch Sookie until they arrived. I went ahead with my errands. The next thing I knew, the Sheriff had tracked me down and said there'd been a car accident."

"Have you seen your brother since that day?" Amelia asked next. They had explored this possibility before Sookie had become Amelia's patient, but now the doctor needed to fill in the gaps of the story.

"No."

"Describe your brother at the time of his disappearance," Amelia requested, feeling more like a cop than a therapist at that moment. It was a bit exciting!

The old woman gave a brief description, and Amelia's next question was about Bartlett's vehicle.

"A 1990 Lincoln Town Car," Adele told her.

"What color?"

"Tan," Adele replied quickly

"All right, the only thing I can't seem to figure out is this thing about a dead girl," Amelia sighed.

"Dead girl?" Adele felt a chill down her spine.

"Yes," Amelia frowned. "Sookie says that she saw a dead girl who looked remarkably like the woman she met yesterday; only she was much younger."

Adele swallowed hard, "How old was the girl?"

"I didn't ask," Amelia confessed.

"Ask her how old the girl was," Adele commanded, and the therapist turned around to re-enter the house.

"Dr. Broadway," Sookie stood up suddenly when Amelia returned. "I don't want to be on my prescription any longer!"

"Sookie," Amelia soothed, "it's okay. The medication isn't making you hallucinate."

"I don't want to remember the rest!" Sookie cried. "I don't want to remember it!"

"Shh, okay, just relax," Amelia told her softly as Eric tried to calm his fiancée with gentle strokes of her hand. "Sookie, I just want to ask you one more question. The dead girl. How old was she?"

Sookie frowned, "I don't know, she wasn't filling out yet, but she didn't have her baby face. If I had to guess, I'd say about nine or so?"

"Okay," Amelia nodded and walked away once again to speak more with Adele. "She said the girl was about nine years old. Why is that important?"

Adele swallowed hard, "Fintan's niece went missing nearly nine years ago. Only a few days before the car accident. She was ten, and police from Monroe asked me about my brother while I was in the hospital with Sookie."

"My God," Amelia whispered.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	23. Chapter 23

**Unspoken Feelings**

 **Chapter Twenty-Three: Rest In Peace**

Fintan sat at the Stackhouse kitchen table, his fingers cupped in front of his face as he absorbed the news of his niece's death. After all the pieces were fit together, Adele had determined the only place between her house and her son's fatal car accident that an entire car could have been hidden for nearly a decade. A lake not twenty yards into the woods just within the line of the property belonging to the Stackhouses.

Within hours the Sheriff had come out with a pair of kids willing to dive into the lake. A car was pulled out shortly after, several snapped fishing lines clinging to deteriorated wiper blades and fenders.

The gore had been minimal, bones having been picked clean by fish and other inhabitants of the lake. When the trunk had been cracked open, the remains of a young child had been found with clothing preserved, protected from scavengers but not bacteria. Fintan had been able to identify the shorts the girl had been wearing as Claudette Brigant's. The four leaf clover embroidered on the cuff was all he needed to see to know it was his niece.

"I'm so sorry, Fintan," Adele whispered as she set a mug of tea in front of her former lover.

"I knew she was dead," Fintan choked as his hands settled back toward the table, "but I wasn't ready to accept it, I suppose."

"No one is ever ready to accept that a loved one is gone forever," Adele assured him. "Have you called your brother?"

"Yes," Fintan nodded. "He's coming by with his family so they can bring Claudette home together."

"I'm so sorry," Adele gasped.

"It wasn't your fault Addy," Fintan took her hand and squeezed it comfortingly.

"It was my brother," Adele placed her other hand over his.

"We can't help who our family is," Fintan smiled a ghost of his usual expression. "I will never hold you responsible. In fact, if it had been anyone else's brother, we might never have known what happened to Claudette. I'm just grateful to know my son is the one who inadvertently avenged my niece's death. I'm relieved to know he protected his daughter."

Though the death of Bartlett Hale was still speculated who had done the murdering, everyone agreed that it had to have been Corbett or Michelle Stackhouse.

"Where is Sookie?" Fintan asked suddenly.

"With Eric and Jason," Adele replied as she kept her hands folded around Fintan's. "She wants to stop taking her medication."

"Couldn't she lose her voice if she does?" Fintan asked worriedly.

"It's possible, but she's scared that she'll keep remembering more details about the murder if she stays on the meds," Adele explained sadly. "Dr. Broadway thinks if she stays in therapy, it could help Sookie keep her voice, but it could severely hinder her ability to speak in public or under stress."

"Even with the medication, she can barely say a word to me," Fintan pointed out sadly.

"That might be more my fault than anything else," Adele sighed. "I practically raised that girl, and I've been lying to her the entire time. Meeting you was more stressful than it should have been. "

"She will get over it," Fintan assured.

"I don't know that I deserve to be forgiven," Adele admitted.

Fintan sighed, "Addy, what happened between us is more than a sordid affair. I've loved you my entire life. I never stopped loving you. I never married because it was you that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with or no one."

Adele flicked away an unbidden tear, "You always were an idiot."

"I was your idiot," Fintan grinned at her. "I understood why you wouldn't marry me. My father was a tyrant, and you knew if we had any children he'd bully us into sending them to his old academy as soon as they were old enough to go. He'd cut me out of his will over it, he'd run us out of town. Hell, he'd probably sue for custody and win," Fintan let out a long breath. "I really do understand."

"The day I came to you after I'd married," Adele whispered, "do you remember it?"

Fintan snorted, "How could I forget?"

"I'd just been to the doctor. Earl and I had been trying for years to have a baby, and it just wasn't happening. Back then, there was no way to know whose fault it was, but I _felt_ like it was my fault. I needed my best friend," Adele brought Fintan's hand to her cheek. "And you were there for me. You made me feel like my value had nothing to do with having babies."

Fintan's finger grazed gently against Adele's cheek, "Having you back in my life even for that single day was the most treasured day in my life… For the next two years."

Adele chortled, "I wanted to thank you without telling you what you'd done for me."

"And then you made me wait another two years for my next thank you?" Fintan smiled.

"I had to take the baby weight off. I didn't want you to suspect," Adele confessed.

"I wondered why your breasts looked so amazing," Fintan sighed and earned a swat in the chest from Adele. "Earl treated you right after you had our son, though?"

Adele smiled, "He returned to the man I'd fallen for and chose to marry. I suppose we all handle stress in our own way."

"It wasn't right for him to treat you like that. After all, it _was_ his fault you weren't getting pregnant," Fintan pointed out.

A small sound of a throat clearing drew the pair to look at the archway. Sookie stood with her eyes downcast as she approached the old friends.

"So-ory," Sookie forced out.

"Oh, Sookie," Adele jumped to her feet and embraced her granddaughter, "I'm the one who's sorry! I didn't mean to keep so much from you!"

Sookie wrapped her arms around her Gran's middle and buried her face against the warm shoulder of her grandmother. After the day she'd had, Sookie had no room for anger. She was too exhausted.

"How are you holding up, sweet girl?" Gran asked in a gentle whisper that could have compelled the young woman to sleep. A whimpering sound was the reply the girl offered, and Adele pulled Sookie tighter against her side.

With her eyes hidden it was easier to forget about Fintan. "Sca-ared to sleep, " Sookie confessed.

"I don't blame you, " Adele crooned. "Why don't you go back to Eric's and get out of this house? It might make you feel better, " Gran suggested.

"Mmm, " Sookie hummed distractedly.

"Go on, let me handle everything else from here, " Adele patted Sookie's side and watched sadly as her granddaughter took Eric's hand on the back porch and headed off down the road.

"My granddaughter is getting married?" Fintan noted the engagement ring.

"This June, " Adele divulged.

"Wow, my granddaughter is getting married," Fintan sat back heavily in his seat. "I'd really like it if I could get to know my family, Addy."

"I won't keep them from you," Adele assured him.

Fintan lowered his gaze, "Will you keep yourself from me?"

Adele blinked in surprise, "What are you asking, Fintan?"

The man raised his head to admit, "I wasn't lying when I said I never got married because you were the only wife I ever wanted, Addy. We've changed with the years, but I always hoped something would bring us back together. After all, what are the odds my niece and Sookie's fiancé would meet at school, become friends, and eventually lead to finally putting this horrible mystery to rest?"

When Adele didn't reply right away, Fintan rose from his seat and took her hands in his. "Just think about it, Addy," he encouraged. "I'm going to leave now and meet my brother and his family at the morgue. I'll be back-"

"Come to Easter this Sunday," Adele blurted suddenly.

Fintan's mouth split into a wide grin, "I will."

{†}

"What's all the commotion going on?" Tara called from her spot on the porch swing. Sookie thought Tara and Pam looked mighty cozy together, but she didn't say anything about it.

Instead, the young woman looked at her fiancé and shook her head, "You tell them. I just… can't."

Eric nodded as he let go of Sookie's hand and let her run into the house, and probably to his room.

"Eric, what's going on?" Pam asked worriedly.

The brother sat on the porch step and tried to keep the explanation short, "The abridged version of the story is that a couple dead bodies were found in the Stackhouse's lake."

"The fuck!" Tara shouted in surprise. "Who died?"

Pam could feel the blood draining from her face.

"Adele's brother, and a little girl. I don't want to start gossip, but it looks like she was in the trunk of Hale's car. He tried to run off with Sookie, but I guess her parents showed up before he got her in the car. If I had to put money on it, I'd bet it was her father that killed Hale," Eric told them.

"Holy shit," Tara leaned forward. "That was the day her parents died?"

"Yes," Eric nodded. "Sookie started remembering pieces."

"Did Bartlett do anything to her?" Pam whispered.

"Not that Sookie remembers," Eric shook his head. "There's other stuff that happened today too, but I'd rather keep it among the family." He glanced at Tara, hoping she'd get his point, but when the other girl didn't seem to budge, Eric nodded to himself before standing up and heading for the door. "I'll tell you about it later."

Disengaged from his sister, Eric climbed his way up the stairs to see if Sookie had in fact taken refuge in his bedroom. When he opened his door, the light from the hallway was enough to show the evidence of Sookie's body curled up beneath his blankets.

Shutting the door behind him and plunging the room into darkness, Eric kicked his shoes off and crawled beneath the covers.

"Are you still awake?" Eric whispered as he wrapped his arms around Sookie's waist.

"I couldn't sleep if I wanted to," Sookie murmured back.

"How are you holding up?" Eric pushed her hair behind her ear and continued to comb it with his fingers.

"A breeze could knock me over," Sookie confessed.

"We'll get through this, Sookie," Eric assured her.

"You leave in five days. I'll never be over all of it in five days," Sookie replied despondently.

"What if I didn't go back?" Eric asked and felt Sookie immediately begin turning in his arms.

" _No,_ "Sookie hissed so venomously that Eric felt a shiver run down his spine.

"It was just a thought," Eric assured her.

"I don't want you to ruin a whole semester for this," Sookie told him and turned to cling to his shirt.

"For what?" Eric wondered. "For my future wife who not only is finally remembering the day of the worst trauma of her life but also discovered she witnessed a murder _and_ was told that the genetic lineage she thought she had is a complete lie?"

"Yeah, that," Sookie sighed, wiping her eyes against his t-shirt.

"Sookie," Eric pulled away enough to give her lips a brief, comforting kiss, "Do you ever wonder if the universe is forcing us to unload all of this shit before we get married?"

"That's oddly philosophical for you," Sookie noted. Her fiancé was intelligent, but he was definitely not interested in theology. "Oh! I didn't go to church today!" She moaned in realization.

"I think God would understand," Eric comforted. "Let's not talk about the accident anymore. Let's talk about your Gran."

Sookie let out a long sigh. "I'm mad that she hid all this from me, but I overhead some of the stories before we left. They were really in love before Gran met… the man formerly known as my grandfather."

"What happened?" Eric asked curiously, trying to draw her out of the mindset of abduction and murder.

"They were childhood sweethearts by the sound of it, but Fintan had an overbearing father," Sookie began slowly. "Gran realized that Fintan's dad would force them to raise their children _his_ way, and Gran didn't want that. Instead, she married Earl Stackhouse. After a few years of not getting pregnant, the man I thought was my grampa was unkind to Gran about not giving him babies. I don't know what all that entailed, though. Gran went to Fintan for comfort after another no-go on the baby front. I suppose one thing lead to another, and they made my daddy."

"Are you mad that she cheated on your grandfather?" Eric asked.

"…No," Sookie admitted.

"Does it make you worry about your faith in marriage?" Eric wondered.

"No," she replied with more resolve than before. "I'm sad that Gran seemed to settle on Grampa, but that's what she did. She settled when she knew who it was that she loved with all her heart. I _know_ that I love you with all my heart, Eric. I _know_ that you're not settling on me either. I'm not scared that we would cheat on each other."

Eric relaxed, "Do you think you can forgive her?"

"I know I can," Sookie smiled. "I already do."

Eric smiled happily, "I'm glad to hear it."

"As for all the stuff with Bartlett," Sookie began, and Eric groaned internally at being back on the subject, "I'm still scared to remember any more of it."

"I'm sure that you are," Eric understood. "Still, going off your medication is very premature, Sookie. You might need to taper off, not stop taking it all together. You need to consult Dr. Broadway about that."

"You're not scared I'll lose my voice again?" Sookie asked in surprise.

"No," Eric told her. "I'm confident that you'll still be able to speak even after you go off your medication. Even if by some off chance you did lose your ability to vocalize, we've never had a problem _speaking_ to each other."

An unbidden sob escaped Sookie's lips as she suddenly clung to Eric in relief.

"Can I ask why you don't want to know the truth about what all happened?" Eric asked quietly.

"It's not about _knowing,_ "Sookie tried to explain. "It's about _feeling_. It's so vivid and real, and I have to experience it as a helpless child, Eric. I can't fight back or run. I have to watch and feel and be scared out of my mind with no comfort that it will end."

"Going off your medication isn't going to guarantee that you'll stop remembering," Eric tried to tell her as delicately as he could. "It might make it harder to get through the dreams." Sookie's eyes sprang with fresh tears. "This might be a bell we can't un-ring."

"It isn't fair," Sookie hiccuped.

"I know," Eric rumbled in as soothing a voice as he could muster.

"Why does everything have to keep going so wrong when I'm the happiest I've ever been?" Sookie demanded.

"Maybe God knows you're strong enough now," Eric considered. "He knows you need to face all of these things eventually, and He waited until you were ready to handle it."

"You're pushing God into the conversation a lot. It's not like you," Sookie frowned.

"My beliefs have nothing to do with it," Eric told her. "I know it's what you need to hear. He brings you comfort, and if I need to remind you of that, then I will."

"Thank you," Sookie snuggled closer to her future husband.

{†}

"Sookie _and_ Eric," Dr. Amelia Broadway said in surprise when her patient arrived for the normally scheduled appointment. "Always good to see you two together."

"We only have a few more days before I go back to school," Eric appeared tired and melancholy. "I don't want to miss a moment with her."

Amelia smiled, "How are you two doing after everything that happened on Sunday?"

"Gran handled all the stuff with the police and the Brigants," Sookie began slowly. "The Brigants were surprisingly nice to us even though it was one of our family members that…" she trailed off with a sudden distraction.

"Claudine thanked us for finding her sister," Eric offered. "That was awkward and depressing."

Amelia nodded, "I'm glad that there doesn't appear to be a rift torn over this sad occasion."

"Am I going to keep remembering more and more about that day?" Sookie asked sadly.

"It's possible, but not necessarily," Amelia smiled apologetically. "It's possible that you will remember more, but you might never recover all the memories from that day. You were, after all, very young at the time and suffered a major head injury after a traumatic event. The fact you've remembered as much as you have is impressive after so long."

"Will quitting my medication keep me from remembering anything else?" Sookie demanded desperately.

"I doubt it, Sookie," Amelia frowned. "It wasn't just the medication that helped open this memory to you. It was meeting Claudine and hearing a traumatic story that made a connection in your mind about the attack and eventual murder of your uncle."

"What are the odds that her memories are accurate?" Eric asked suddenly.

Amelia raised her eyebrows in surprise, "Well, like many memories, the older they are, the more details are lost and the more embellished the memorable things become. Recovered memories like these can be tricky because they can be so heavily influenced by suggestion, or at least that's something I believe very strongly. Some cases shone a hideous light on therapists and mental health professionals when groups of patients were influenced into believing they'd recovered memories that had actually been suggested to them by their "therapist,"" Amelia threw air quotes around the word 'therapist' and openly sneered. "It gave us a bad name for a while."

"Then the things I'm remembering could be wrong?" Sookie asked in dismay.

Thinking a moment, Amelia confessed, "Obviously everything isn't inaccurate. There are abundant amounts of evidence backing up your memories, but the way you perceive it could be inaccurate. The sequence of events could be out of order, or other memories could have wiggled their way in and didn't actually happen at that time."

Sookie's face fell, "I'll have to live with these memories and never know what's real and what isn't?"

Amelia tried to give her patient an encouraging smile. "I think the most important thing you need to take away from all of this is that you met a monster, and there was a hero nearby to protect you from it."

 **The Forgotten Chapter**

 **WARNING: THIS CHAPTER ADDITION IS UNSETTLING AND ONLY HERE FOR THOSE WHO WANT TO KNOW THE WHOLE STORY OF WHAT HAPPENED TO CLAUDETTE AND SOOKIE NINE YEARS AGO. IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO READ TO UNDERSTAND FUTURE CHAPTERS.**

Bartlett Hale had always reckoned himself a lucky man.

For years he had managed to live a modest lifestyle on the outer rim of Monroe, Louisiana. He'd rustled himself up a nice, big plot of land backed up to a beautiful fishing hole, and it was all paid for by his passion.

That passion existed in the bowels of his Fun House, a hidden bunker with an access door camouflaged as a wood stack. He'd had plenty of good times in that bunker. There was an art to breaking girls in, and Bartlett Hale had spent years mastering his craft until he could sell it to well-vetted parties.

Unfortunately, in the late summer of 1988, he'd run into a heap of trouble that would force him to abandon his little paradise and his Fun House.

A girl of about ten years old had been coming up the dirt road from the lake he lived on, and even from a distance, Bartlett knew he could get a pretty penny out of her.

By faking an injury, Bartlett had lured the girl over to his yard and told her to run into his house to call an ambulance. When the girl was near the door, Bartlett sprung up and shoved her to the ground. It was no feat of strength to tie her up and drag her into his Fun House after that.

Next, he went and grabbed the girl's bike, rolling it out of view of the street. He'd throw it in the lake after it was dark.

As Bartlett came back to the front of his house and headed toward the woodpile, he saw two more children riding up the street where his new product had come from. Bartlett scowled and swore under his breath before heading into his house. The girl coming up the road looked identical to the one he'd snatched, and the most he could hope was that no one would snoop too hard.

If he pumped the girl with Xanax for the next few days, it would assure that she remained quiet if someone came by his place looking for her. Bartlett was confident no one would suspect the woodpile as long as no noises were coming from it.

Once the children had disappeared around the bend, Bartlett grabbed his cameras and headed to the woodpile. The first thing he would need was a buyer before he could determine the quote for his training.

When he arrived in the Fun House, the little girl was screaming her head off, already awake.

"Cry, cry, cry, baby," Bartlett laughed to himself as he began taking the girl's photo. "My buyers love those tears." He switched cameras. "For my own collection, y'see." He took another set of photos and then left for his darkroom to develop the film. When he returned again, it was with a couple pills and a roll of duct tape.

Bartlett forced the pills into the girl's mouth, and the slapped a piece of tape over her lips so she couldn't spit them out. She'd either swallow them, or they'd dissolve and do their job.

A few hours later, Bartlett was patting himself on the back for having such foresight as to drug and gag the girl because someone _had_ come to his place looking for her. The first night it was a father saying his daughter had gone missing, and asking if he'd seen her.

Bartlett had replied he'd seen a few kids on their bikes heading up the road earlier that afternoon, but nothing after that.

The next morning, the police arrived looking for the girl, but Bartlett had already rowed out to throw the girls' bike in the lake the previous night and invited the police to have a look around his property.

The only problem Bartlett hadn't accounted for was the old widow that lived on the farm a quarter mile up the road. She had been on her porch snapping fresh peas all afternoon and had seen the brother and sister on their bikes, but not the second little girl who had left the lake first. When the police asked if she might have just not noticed the first girl, the widow had insisted that the stretch of road in front of her house was too long not to see a child on a bike pedaling past.

Bartlett became nervous when the cops showed up again. By the end of the day, the man was too worried to remain any longer, and couldn't risk putting out his advertisement for sales. Instead, Bartlett did the only thing he could before they put surveillance on him. He went down to his Fun House and with little effort, snapped the girl's neck as she remained passed out. Next, the man took a few parting photos and threw the body into the trunk of his car. He left the corpse overnight before heading to his sister's the following morning.

With the plan to dump the body on Adele's property, Bartlett decided he'd swing by Linda's place on his way out of Louisiana and run off with Hadley. He'd spent so much time grooming Hadley that it seemed a shame to waste the efforts. He just needed to get into Adele's address book to see where Linda lived now that she was divorced.

Deciding that his "Brochure" would be enough to earn him some extra cash until he could set up a new shop, Bartlett hid the photo album of his work, along with the negatives, beneath the passenger's seat of the car as he drove toward Bon Temps.

Yet another snag appeared in his plans when Bartlett discovered that his sister was babysitting little Sookie. It took very little coaxing to encourage Adele to let him watch the girl so that errands could be run. However, a game of hide-and-seek had broken out while the adults negotiated, and Bartlett wasted precious minutes trying to track down the hiding child.

When a terrified shriek drew Bartlett outside, he found that Sookie had hidden in his car and found his "Brochure." The little girl dropped the book on the floor of the car, jumped from the vehicle and tried to run back into the farmhouse to safety.

At that moment Bartlett felt his years of patience and planning slipping from him. He knew he had no choice but to wrangle in Sookie and get rid of her. There was no telling how much time he had before her parents arrived to pick her up, or Adele returned from shopping.

Bartlett chased Sookie into the house, startled at how quickly she seemed to disappear, but relieved that a little girl couldn't control her fear and was sobbing somewhere nearby. He found her hiding beneath Adele's bed and dragged her out by her ankle. The little one kicked and scratched until she was loose again and bolted for the stairs. This time Bartlett caught her by her hair, yanking Sookie down the steps and dragging her kicking and screaming from the house.

Sookie cried for her daddy, she scratched at Bartlett's hands and arms, and just when the old man was about to silence her with a pair of hands around her neck, the world went black.

Corbett Stackhouse panted wildly as he struck his uncle over the head with the hunk of metal he'd groped for in the bed of his truck. Bartlett had been so focused on Sookie that he hadn't seen the new vehicle in the driveway, he hadn't noticed his nephew panicked at his daughter's screams, coming up the behind him with the weapon.

Despite the single blow dropping Bartlett to the ground, something in Corbett Stackhouse was unappeased with the one strike. Instead, he brought the tire iron over his head again and again until his wife's screams of, "Corbett, stop!" finally steadied his arm.

Looking at his stunned daughter, Corbett dropped his weapon and pulled Sookie to him. She was staring at him wide-eyed.

"Sookie, honey," Corbett whispered, his voice stifled with emotion. "Close your eyes, baby girl, and daddy'll get rid of this monster that came at ya."

Sookie shut her eyes immediately and felt her daddy lift her from the ground. The next thing she knew, Sookie could smell her mother's perfume, she could feel the familiar softness of her mother's lap and breasts. She was safe.

"Corbett, what are you going to do?" Michelle asked in an anxious, quiet whisper.

"I'm gonna dump the body and car into that pond back there," Corbett muttered.

"You were protecting your daughter," Michelle told him.

"One hit dropped him, Shelly," Corbett hissed back. "I overdid it. I'll get put away for that!" He pointed back to the body worriedly.

"Corbett, we need to call the police."

"No, Shelly," Corbett snapped and closed the truck door, silencing his wife's protests.

"It's okay, Baby. Daddy's gonna take care of everything," Michelle told her daughter. "You just never tell anybody about today, Baby. It was just a bad dream. It wasn't even real!" Sookie blinked her eyes open to stare at her mother's wide, blue eyes. "Never talk about this bad dream to anybody, Sookie."

Corbett bounced across the yard in his uncle's car until he arrived at the pond just inside the tree line of his mother's property. With little effort, he drove the car into the lake and waited to make sure it would sink. Corbett never knew of the dead little girl in the trunk, nor the book of horrors sitting on the floor of the passenger seat. All Corbett knew was that he had killed his uncle and sunk him in the pond for trying to hurt his little girl.

When Corbett arrived back at the truck, he found his wife crooning at their daughter in a soothing tone that belied her wide, terrified eyes.

"It's okay, honey, daddy got rid of the monster," Corbett told her.

"Yes, the monster from your bad dream is all gone. Daddy scared it away for good," Michelle tried to convince her daughter it had all been a nightmare, and that it would eventually fade from her memory like most dreams did.

Corbett slid back behind the wheel, and Michelle held her daughter until the farmhouse was well behind them.

As the shaken family turned around the bend, Michelle began to move so she could fasten her daughter safely in the back of the cab. Undoing her seatbelt, Michelle nudged Sookie into the rear seat and did up the girl's safety harness.

"We'll be home before you get her belted in, Shelly," Corbett grumbled.

"It's not safe for children to ride in the front," Michelle argued distractedly. "I saw it on the news."

Corbett knew that his wife was still in shock and disbelief and that going through the motions was all she could think to do. That was why he didn't protest her actions. If he had, then all three of them might have died in the crash that would soon happen.

Instead, when the tire blew out, and Michelle's body lurched with the sudden shift, Sookie was safely belted in her seat. The little girl might have left the crash without a scratch if her mother's loose body hadn't bounced within the confines of the truck's cab.

An elbow flung back as Michelle tried to brace herself and caught the side of her husband's head, cracking his temple harshly against the window. The instance Corbett's head hit the glass, he lost all chance of bringing the truck back under control. His disorientation caused the vehicle to wobble dangerously until it turned on its side and Michelle was bucked back toward Sookie, and his daughter's screams were silenced. Corbett lurched backward and was immediately propelled forward again so that his face struck the steering wheel.

The truck skidded along its side for a moment. Sookie was silent. Michelle was limp against the passenger door, and Corbett prayed they might be okay. He really believed that they might all be okay as he turned off the ignition. Even as he heard the pattering sound of water beating against a hard surface, and looked down to see that the water was the blood dripping from his face and collecting on the passenger window, he thought he might live. When the world began to grow narrower and darker, that hope waned.

"Shh, Sookie," Corbett tried to croon, his voice choked with devastation. It had to have been the shock that made his lips utter his daughter's lullaby. The fear that she was dead in the backseat might have spurred the melody from his mouth. Whatever the reason, Corbett garbled the lyrics. "Daddy's here. Shh, Sookie, don't you fear. Shh, Sookie, not a peep. Shh, Sookie, time to sleep. Shh…" was the final sound from Corbett's lips as his daughter remained unconscious, strapped in the back of the truck.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	24. Chapter 24

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: I hope you all enjoy the new chapter!_

 **Chapter Twenty-Four: Repercussions**

Eric glanced at Claudine nervously as they boarded the plane back to New Orleans together. "How are you?"

Claudine looked at her friend as if he were insane, "Really?"

"I'm sorry. I don't know what to say or do at all lately," Eric confessed as they came to their seats and flopped into them.

"That makes two of us," Claudine admitted. "How's Sookie?" She hoped for some levity.

"A mess," Eric told her. "I didn't want to come back to school."

Claudine frowned, "You know I'm not mad at her or her family, right?"

"I know. I think they do too, but they're still ashamed," Eric confessed.

"Ashamed?"

"That they are related to a monster," Eric answered.

"You can't help who you're related to," Claudine pointed out.

"Don't I know it," Eric sighed. "My own aunt tried to con my siblings and me out of our inheritance. Of course, we'd never met her before that."

Claudine chuckled, "My grandpa threatened to cut my dad out of his will if he didn't send my brother, sister and me to his old academy in Maine. Dad almost got stripped from the will, but then Claudette went missing. Dad wanted us to have a fresh start, maybe he hoped to protect us from getting discouraged the longer time went by without finding her."

"When your sister went missing, is that when you changed your name to Crane?" Eric asked.

"Yes. Claudette's name was all over the papers with her picture. I guess Dad thought a different last name would keep the attention off of me," Claudine replied distractedly, remembering those long days of fear and sadness. "I wish the coroner could have told us more about how she died and if she suffered. They still don't even know for sure if she was dead before the car went into the water."

Eric took Claudine's hand and gave it a brief squeeze before placing his hand back on his lap. Even the most fleeting touch of consolation felt like a betrayal to Sookie. Claudine would be a sort of cousin to him in a few months. He didn't want her to get the wrong idea, or worse, seek him out for comfort in her time of difficulty.

That realization made Eric wonder if Claudine knew that Jason and Sookie were Fintan's illegitimate grandchildren. _Oh, I'm not opening that can of worms!_ He thought worriedly.

"It's crazy though," Claudine cleared her throat of some of the tightness that had built with her emotions. "Uncle Fintan was practically clinging to your fiancée's grandmother. I wonder if they knew each other before?"

"Who knows?" Eric utilized all of his muscle control to keep his body from giving him away.

"I mean," Claudine frowned now, "Jason _does_ look an awful lot like our Uncle Dermot." Claudine suddenly laughed. "Could you imagine if my Uncle Dermot had an affair with your fiancée's grandmother?" She seemed to giggle to the point of near hysteria, but Eric figured it was from the emotional roller coaster they'd been on over Spring Break. "And now she's making a play for Uncle Fintan because Uncle Dermot is married?"

"She might be interested in Fintan, but I don't think she had an affair with Dermot," Eric tried to keep the nervousness out of his laugh.

"I wish I could have been at your Easter gathering today," Claudine chuckled, and Eric couldn't bear to change the subject. His friend seemed so much more at ease with the scandalous discussion. "How'd Sookie's family react to a strange man at the house?"

Eric groaned, "Let's just say there was a lot of incredulous stares."

In reality, Eric was surprised by how well everything went. It was hell, but no one was killed, and no one cried. In Eric's opinion, that was an achievement.

Linda had shrieked in disbelief that the identity of her father had been a lie. Jason had shouted, "MY FUCKING LAST NAME IS BRIGANT!?" And Hadley had cackled and offered an unanswered high-five to her grandmother.

After the initial shock had worn off, an awkward getting-to-know-you phase began, and most of the conversations were about how good the food was. Linda left early with a surprisingly reluctant Hadley, and Jason had stormed off to his friend Hoyte's. Sookie had gone back to Rosenfont Hall with Eric, Godric, and Pam, and Adele was left alone with Fintan. Later that evening, Eric had met Claudine at the airport for their return to school.

Eric let Claudine continue her story weaving, her suspicions becoming more audacious with every minute. By the time they landed in New Orleans, Eric was actually smiling in amusement at some of the theories Claudine had come up with. Some had actually been rather close to the truth.

Together, they pooled their money together for a cab back to campus, and Eric walked Claudine to her dorm.

"Thanks for being so nice to me on the plane," Claudine sighed as she leaned heavily against the door of her building. "I know with everything Sookie went through over the week, it must have been rough on you too."

"It was," Eric agreed, "but we've made it this far, and we'll make it all the way through the school year."

"You both are crazy strong, you know?" Claudine told him.

"What do you mean?"

"I know about the assault back in February," Claudine explained. "I know that she's been bullied for years, and Uncle Fintan told the family about what she remembered from the day my sister's murderer was killed. For her to get through _all that_ and not beg you to stay home with her or quit school herself to follow you here? That's some nerves of steel your lady has. And for you to just be stuck there seeing all this happen to her, and not be able to do anything to stop it… You guys are inhumanly strong."

"Believe me," Eric shook his head, "I'm a husk of a man right now. It _does_ hurt. Sookie hurts, I hurt. All of this feels like walking through the desert and seeing the lights of civilization on the horizon. The only thing we can do is keep walking forward. If we fall apart now, we suffered all this time for nothing."

"You guys are still amazing, and never let anyone tell you differently," Claudine patted his shoulder and found her hand lingering there. Her eyes seemed to glaze over in deep thought as she involuntarily licked her lips.

"Claudine," Eric could feel the weight of her hand increasing as she began to lean forward. "If you do what I think you're going to do, we can't be friends anymore."

The young woman blinked, and Eric felt the pressure on his shoulder disappear, making him let out a relieved sigh.

"Sorry," Claudine shook her head as if trying to dispel a flicker of dizziness. "I swear I'm not attracted to you, I just wish I had someone to hold me, you know?"

"I do," Eric nodded, "but my Little Spoon is back in Bon Temps wishing the same thing. She's the only one I'd want to hold."

Claudine laughed, "I wouldn't dream of stealing her Big Spoon."

With that, Claudine waved goodbye and turned into her building. Eric let out another relieved huff and made his way to his own dorm. The halls were crowded with several students arriving back on campus, and Eric had to shove his way to his room.

"Hey, Alcide, you look like you've been back for a while," Eric waved at his roommate.

"I came back early," Alcide admitted.

"Oh yeah? What's up?" Eric threw his backpack down and sat across from his friend. Alcide reached up and raked his fingers through his hair and tugged it. "Alcide? What the hell happened?"

"I have _syphilis_!" Alcide hissed.

"Wait… What?" Eric's jaw slung down in horror.

"Debbie gave me syphilis," Alcide told him. "She's been fucking cheating on me, and now I have syphilis!"

"Stop saying syphilis!" Eric snapped. "Did you get tested? It's really an infection? Did you get a shot of antibiotics?"

"Yes! I had this weird spot on my dick, and I panicked because Debbie's been giving me doubts about how faithful she's been. I went straight to Planned Parenthood and found out I have… it."

"Did you talk to Debbie about it?" Eric asked next.

"She said I must've gotten it from a toilet seat," Alcide rolled his eyes.

Eric scowled at the lame excuse, "Hey, man, it's going to be okay. I mean, you have to get retested a few times to make sure it's all gone, but it'll be okay. Did they do a full workup and an AIDS test?"

"Yeah, I'm good on everything else. You seem to know an awful lot about STDs," Alcide stared at his roommate.

"I had a scare a few years back. Let's just say I could have turned into a hypochondriac with all the research I did. I was getting tested for months after," Eric told him. "Now _please_ tell me you broke up with that bitch?"

"I broke up with that bitch."

"Finally, something good happened this week!" Eric raised his hands in relief.

"You and Sookie didn't have a good visit?" Alcide asked in surprise.

"Alcide," Eric stopped him, "there is no way you want to hear about my week. After February, you can have this one."

"Now I'm just curious," Alcide confessed.

"A story for another day. I have to call Sookie and let her know I'm back at school safely. Oh, by the way, if you want me to introduce you to a beautiful woman, I know one that's available."

"Does she think infections are hot?"

"No," Eric frowned, "but she's looking for a Big Spoon, and spooning is all you're good for the next two or three months."

Alcide moaned with embarrassment and anger, "I can't believe she did this to me!"

"Listen," Eric leaned back in his seat, "I didn't want to put my nose in your business, but between the rumors I heard, and now this-"

"What rumors?" Alcide demanded.

"My friend Claudine used to be friends with Debbie," Eric began again. "She decided not to hang out with her anymore because we figured out that Debbie was trying to set us up. That's beside the point, though." Eric waved off the detour of his explanation. "Claudine told me that Debbie's been leaving parties with a group of people and that she's looked pretty high at some of those parties."

Alcide nodded slowly, "In a few months it won't matter. After the scores she got on her midterms, there's no way she'll be back next year."

"I really am sorry, Alcide," Eric offered again, and his roommate nodded.

"It's okay," Alcide moped. "The more I think about it, the more I realize I was in love with a version of Debbie that has been gone for a long time. It's hard, you know? When you look at someone you've known your whole life and realize that you've both changed so much. It's really terrifying to realize you don't even recognize each other."

Eric nodded, "I guess it's important not to look away from each other for too long. Talk and if you don't share an interest, at least care enough about the other person to understand their interests."

"That's a big one," Alcide agreed. "I don't know when it was, but we stopped liking a lot of the same things. What do you and Sookie like to do?"

Eric smiled to himself as he thought of his fiancée, "She likes to draw and paint. I'll usually sit in the room with her and read a book or something. Sometimes when I look away from what I'm doing and see the way her face crinkles when she's concentrating, I can't help but go over and distract her a little bit. She got me interested in fishing, and we often go land some catfish for her Gran to cook up for the family. I like taking her to do things she's been putting off."

"Like what?" Alcide asked, and Eric smiled at his enthusiasm.

"I like taking her shopping for clothes," Eric laughed.

"Seriously?" Alcide raised his eyebrows in disbelief.

"Seriously," Eric nodded and chuckled again. "I like seeing how and why Sookie chooses things. She picks things that will last and can be used for multiple things. She's practical, but still manages to look sweet and very… Sookie, I guess."

"You have given me a whole new set of relationship goals," Alcide told him hollowly. In truth, he was terrified about starting all over in a relationship.

"I think the most important thing is being able to talk to one another, and more importantly, _enjoying_ talking to each other," Eric offered, becoming a bit self-conscious of Alcide's idolizing gaze. He couldn't hope to be this relationship expert Alcide was beginning to perceive him as. If he was completely honest with both of them, Eric felt like he was just extremely lucky. In his opinion, any of his friends could have met Sookie and fallen immediately in love with her.

{†}

Sookie shifted nervously from foot to foot as she stood in front of the foreboding door of the Brigant Estate. With some difficulty, she'd managed to utter her name to the gate intercom, and had been allowed onto the grounds. Now she was standing in front of the door, waiting for her grandfather to let her in.

"Sookie!" Fintan was still surprised as he opened the door and found his granddaughter waiting for him. "I'm amazed you came all the way out here."

Sookie's reply was to hand him a prepared letter and wait for him to read it.

Fintan accepted the envelope curiously but ignored it long enough to invite Sookie into the house. She followed him, gazing around at all the fantastic art and artifacts filling the colossal home as Fintan walked and read her letter.

 _Dear Fintan,_

 _I would really like to give you the opportunity to get to know each other. In the past week and a half, I've seen my Gran regain her youth, and I know that's because of you. Despite recent events and the fact that I do feel betrayed, I still love my Gran and want her to be happy. If you were serious about how you feel for her, and you want to see if your romance is still alive, I want you to know I support you both._

 _However, I want you to also know that I already had a grandfather. Earl Stackhouse was there for me up until the day he died. He loved me very much, and I loved him. I think Jason feels the exact same way. For that reason, he won't be giving up his last name for yours. Soon I'll be married and will take my husband's name, but even if that weren't the case, I would plan on remaining a Stackhouse as well._

 _So, with all that said, I don't know exactly what you will be to me, but for now, I plan on calling you Fintan and thinking of you as my gran's boyfriend and nothing more. I hope you can respect my stance on this subject._

 _Sincerely,_

 _Sookie Stackhouse_

Fintan chuckled as he finished reading his granddaughter's letter. Although it pained him to be told he would not be called 'grandfather,' Fintan understood her hesitations and tried to find comfort that he may be able to change her mind in the future.

"I find your stances entirely reasonable," Fintan assured her as he folded the letter and placed it in his inner breast pocket. "I hope you can understand why I haven't broached the topic with my own family."

Sookie shrugged. Fintan had to be in his sixties or seventies, and Sookie had a hard time understanding what was so hard about admitting to a few illegitimate children by that age.

"I'm sure you can tell by the estate that I come from money," Fintan told her, trying not to sound like a braggart. "The reason I was put in charge of the estate is that I am the only brother who is unmarried and without children. We all thought it would give me a clear view of my decisions. Now, with this new development, my brothers and I might have to re-evaluate our situation."

The young woman thought that sounded rather stupid, but didn't give any indication about her feelings.

"I suppose that sounds more like an excuse than a reason," Fintan laughed a bit to himself as they arrived in the sitting room and he gestured for his granddaughter to have a seat. "Maybe I'm just scared about what will happen once everyone knows the truth."

Sookie understood that a lot better than his previous remark. She knew what it was like to be scared of people's responses. After all, fear of how her brother and fiancé would react was what lead to Bill's escape from Bon Temps. Fear of what Eric would do if he found out she was being bullied again kept her silent until it was inevitable to admit.

"I do promise to tell them once the news of Claudette isn't so fresh," Fintan assured her.

Reaching for her purse, Sookie took out a small notebook she'd correctly guessed that she would need. Even if she managed to squeak a word out in the foreign surroundings with the unfamiliar man, Sookie knew she'd never say aloud what she really wanted.

" _I'm sure you know your family well enough to recognize when the time's right. I know what it feels like to be uncertain about telling the truth, but I also know that the longer I hesitated, the worse it got. Some people have gotten hurt, myself included, by holding onto a secret out of fear._

 _Don't let fear become the reason you're holding back. Have faith in your relationships."_

Fintan read the message with another smile, "I promise." The pair shared a brief smile before Fintan nudged the conversation along, "So, you wanted to get to know each other. Do you have any questions for me?"

Sookie took her paper once again and scribbled, " _Tell me about how you and Gran met?"_

The older man nodded, "How about we take a walk around the grounds. This is my father's house after all. I wouldn't want any of the servants to tell him before I get the chance."

Sookie realized then that Fintan's explanations had been just vague enough that he could make excuses for his statements. Even the replies that Sookie thought was very telling only made sense with the context of her written words.

This understanding gave Sookie pause in following Fintan out to the grounds, but she still allowed herself to be guided to the yard. Fintan was smiling the whole time, and Sookie thought it made him appear much younger than he was.

"Adele and I have known each other since we were ten years old," Fintan began once they were undoubtedly alone. "She would come to visit her grandparents here in Monroe for the summers. She'd help on the farm they had. It was just a little shack on a large plot of land, and Addy took care of the animals. There was a good fishing hole near her farm. My brother and I would go catch all kinds of fish there. One day I saw Addy on our way to the lake. You wouldn't believe how beautiful your grandmother was, Sookie."

Sookie smiled as she saw Fintan's expression change to one of romantic whimsy.

"Addy was pouring water into one of the troughs, and I thought it was amazing how easily she moved with those buckets. She wasn't like any girl I'd seen before. Addy was strong and capable," Fintan told his granddaughter. "We talked all day. I helped her with her chores, and she shared her fruit with me while we ate under the shade of the porch. Every day of every summer we were together for seven years. During the school year, we would write each other every few weeks.

"As we got older though," Fintan's expression changed from fantasy to regret, "I realized what would happen if we were to marry. My father would insist that any children we had would attend his Alma Mater in Maine. Part of my reason for letting Addy go was because I'd lose my inheritance if we didn't give in to my father's demands. The real reason was that my father would have cornered me out of every business venture I would attempt. I wasn't like Addy. I wasn't _strong_ and capable. I was a rich kid who didn't know what a full day's labor felt like. She would have ended up supporting me, and she deserved better than that."

Sookie paused in their walk and quickly scribbled, " _I think she still would have chosen you even if you were dirt poor."_

"I'm sure she would have," Fintan agreed with that youthful smile. "That's why I left the state to go to college. Dad was pleased, and Addy got the chance to move on from me. We didn't see each other again for another four years. She'd come all the way to Monroe to see a doctor. Her and your grandfather hadn't been able to have any children, and I think she got optimistic that maybe she was pregnant but wanted to be sure without Bon Temps knowing. We ran into each other in the town square and fell into our same, old pattern. We talked and talked. Eventually, she told me about their bad luck. We talked all evening, and I guess Addy felt so relieved to finally let it all out. We made love for the first time ever, and when I woke up the next morning; she was gone."

" _How many times did my Gran cheat on my grampa?"_ Sookie asked, trying not to look as sullen as she felt.

"Three times over the course of four years," Fintan told her. "Two years after the first time, and almost another two years after the second. Last week she told me they were to thank me for giving her our children in the only way she knew how."

" _Why didn't she just tell you?"_

"I think she knew I would have fought for them. There was no DNA testing back then, and I don't believe she could blatantly lie if someone demanded the truth out of her," Fintan admitted. "Your gran has shouldered a fifty-year-old burden, but she didn't do it out of shame. She did it because she understood what it would mean for me to claim your father and aunt."

" _Loss of your inheritance."_

Fintan nodded, "I know why Addy thought money meant more to me than her. I never proved otherwise. I think that her believing that is what made the burden easier for her to take."

Sookie nodded as they came upon her car once again. " _I hope you spend your time with her proving otherwise."_

"I promise," Fintan nodded. "Next time, I want to learn all about you, Sookie."

" _Okay."_

{†}

"So, how's Sookie doing?" Alcides asked as his roommate read through his most recent letter.

"Alright, I suppose, " Eric frowned as he read on. "She is going ahead with discontinuing her medication, but slowly with the doctor's instruction."

"You don't look too happy about that, " Alcide observed.

"It feels far too soon to be trying to continue her recovery without medication. She can still hardly utter a word in front of strangers, " Eric explained. "Then again, she never wanted to be on the medication, to begin with."

"You think she's using this as an excuse to go off her meds?"

Eric laughed, "You make it sound like she's schizophrenic. If this is what Sookie wants to do, then I'll support her. We've never had problems communicating before. If she loses her voice again, I'll still love her just as much as always."

Alcides shook his head in disbelief. "I don't know how you two do it."

Eric frowned, "Speaking of doing it."

His roommate looked up in surprise, "Wow, you've never really brought up your sex life before!"

"Sookie and I have had sex once since she started speaking, " Eric admitted. "It's hard to tell if the medication is causing it or just all the bullshit happening around us lately."

"A lot has been going on, " Alcide agreed. "What about Christmas Break?"

Eric smiled a bit, "I guess it's not the medication."

"I bet once she gets out of that cast; she'll show you just how bad she's been wanting it, " Alcide assured his friend. Eric laughed at the remark. "I gotta admit it, though, that's the most normal reaction I've seen out of you this whole school year."

"How do you mean?" Eric wondered.

With a shrug, Alcide confessed, "You've just been so together about the whole separation thing. It's obvious that you care, but I would think your eyes still would have wandered this year even if you never cheated."

An amused grin played at Eric's lips, "Acknowledging and ogling are two different things. I can notice that a woman is attractive, but I wouldn't stare."

"Prettier than Sookie?" Alcides teased.

"I'm biased. For me, no woman is prettier than Sookie."

"Dude, even when Debbie and I were still stupid in love, I thought other women were prettier, " Alcide playfully accused.

"Then beauty isn't what we're talking about, I suppose. All I know is that ogling another woman feels like a betrayal. When I say she's the most beautiful, I mean that there is no woman worth losing her over."

Alcides nodded in understanding. To him, Debbie had never been on that level for him. He could have thought of several celebrities he'd have dumped his ex for.

"Anyway, " Eric began anew, looking slightly nervous, "I was wondering if you might want to come to my wedding?"

"Really?" Alcides was surprised at being invited.

"Well, now that I don't have to worry about Debbie coming, I don't mind having you there so much."

Alcides laughed more than he thought he would at Eric's remark. "I'd be honored to come," he managed to say around his chuckles.

"Good, maybe Quinn will agree to come if he knows someone other than our families will be there," Eric sighed in relief.

"Does Sookie have any friends coming?" Alcide wondered.

"I believe one of her classmates she was friends with before the accident is coming and that friend's cousin as well," Eric replied thoughtfully

"Are you guys taking a limo to the airport?" Alcide teased.

"No, her brother is driving us, so we don't have to leave my car there while we're overseas," Eric answered.

"Why don't I drive you guys to the airport!" Alcide offered. "I'll be going home to Shreveport anyway, and I'll rattle you less than her brother for sure!"

A look of relief overtook Eric's face at the offer. "That would be excellent."

As the days flitted by, Eric felt more and more anticipation for the end of the school year and the beginning of his new life. Sookie's graduation was only a week and a half after he returned home and her eighteenth birthday followed soon after. Then, it was only two weeks until the wedding.

With a contented stretch, Eric climbed to his feet. "Want to meet up with Claudine with me?"

Ever since Claudine had almost lost her composure and kissed him, Eric hadn't felt comfortable being alone with her. He had found excuses for Quinn to tag along. In a moment of desperation, Eric had invited Felipe, the kid who taught him the guitar, and endured a cringeworthy amount of time listening to the self-titled ladies man hitting on his friend all night

"Sure, " Alcide agreed easily, he had not felt like going out since the evidence of Debbie's infidelity had made itself known. "Where are we going?"

"We're just meeting up at the library so I can help her with her math again. You wouldn't believe how bad she sucks at math," Eric laughed.

Alcide paused on his way to the door, "Eric, is something going on with Claudine?"

"What do you mean?" Eric asked sharply.

His roommate raised his eyebrows as he became even more suspicious. "Well, you don't ever want to be alone with her anymore, and those couple weeks you two were hanging out before Spring Break, you didn't seem so worried about having a chaperone."

Sighing at the fact he'd been so obvious, Eric admitted, "When we got back on our flight, I walked Claudine to her dorm because it was dark and we both had a shitty week. While we were standing in front of the door, she had a look like she was going to kiss me. She was starting to lean toward me, and I snapped her out of it before she could do anything."

"Did you tell Sookie about it?" Alcide asked and was surprised when Eric shook his head. "Why not?"

"Things are complicated between Sookie and Claudine. I don't want to add anything to it," Eric explained.

"Complicated how?" Alcide pressed.

There was a long pause as Eric tried to think of a way to explain everything that had happened. "It's got a lot of personal information in it. I'd rather not talk about it without both of them saying it's okay."

Alcide deflated at the rejection, but he respected Eric's stance. "Well, I'll still go with you and chaperone."

"Thanks, Alcide," Eric sighed as they left their dorm and headed for the library.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: Please remember to review!**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty-Five: Home In Time For Insanity**

Eric scooped his fiancée into his arms for the last time in an airport. The next time they met at a gate like this, she would be his wife, and Eric couldn't wait!

"I missed you so much!" Eric moaned as he held her tighter before pulling away enough to kiss her. He felt Sookie shy away from his kiss after a moment and knew it was because they were drawing the attention of onlookers.

"Mmm," Sookie responded agreeably as he set her back on her feet. " _I missed you too,"_ she signed at him when she had her hands to herself once more.

Eric smiled at the quick, natural flicker of her hands. She was officially a full month without medication, and much to all of their surprise, she could still speak in private to people that she knew well enough. Dr. Broadway had said the fact she could still talk so freely among her family and friends without medication was damn near a miracle. With plenty of practice and experimentation with new social situations, Sookie could eventually overcome her anxiety without drugs. At least, that was the theory.

"Hi, Sookie," Claudine arrived behind Eric, and Sookie paused in her reply to see her holding the hand of Eric's former roommate, Alcide. Upon that realization, Sookie waved merrily. "How have you been?"

Sookie's hands raised to reply, and Eric said aloud for her, "She's happy to have me home. How about you?"

"I'm well, thank you," Claudine answered awkwardly. She wasn't sure how to handle Sookie Stackhouse. Even more, she didn't know how to deal with Uncle Fintan's new romance with Adele Stackhouse, the sister of the man who had murdered her twin.

"We should probably get heading home," Eric told them. "Sookie's graduation is in a few days, and I'm going to need all my willpower not to flip off every single one of her classmates as they go up for their diploma." Sookie nudged Eric in the ribs with her elbow, making him laugh. "I'll see you guys before the wedding, right?"

"Yeah, of course!" Alcide assured as he tugged Claudine toward where his father was waiting for them. "I'll call you sometime this weekend."

The couples waved goodbye, and Sookie jogged excitedly out to the parking lot to show Eric that she had driven the car herself to pick him up. It was the first time she'd been able to drive anywhere after getting her cast off.

Her fiancé smiled and headed for the driver's door. Sookie pouted but handed him the keys to Gran's Station Wagon. Eric unlocked the door and held it open like he usually did for her, but it was the driver's seat.

"Ah!?" Sookie pointed to herself in surprise.

"Yes, you're driving us back," Eric laughed as he handed the keys back to her and made his way around to the passenger side after shutting her door. He knew how important getting some of her independence back meant to her. After getting her arm broken and then losing her footing on recovering her voice, Eric wanted to do whatever he could to make her realize she was still strong and capable.

Sookie leaned across the front seats to unlock Eric's side before he arrived. Once they were in the privacy of the car, Sookie leaned in and whispered, "I love you. I missed you!" against his lips before giving a quick kiss.

"I love you too," Eric smiled at Sookie and settled in for the thirty-minute drive to Bon Temps. He held Sookie's hand as she drove, and shut his eyes. The feel of Sookie's thumb stroking his hand was enough to broaden the smile on his face to a grin. "Have you decided if you want Fintan at our wedding?" He knew it was a sensitive topic, but after just seeing Claudine, Eric figured it was the closest chance he had at a natural segue.

"I still haven't been able to utter a word in front of him," Sookie confessed. "I don't know if I'll be able to say 'I Do,' with him staring at me."

"Has he mentioned talking to his family about yours?" Eric asked, having not read a word in her letters about it since he first returned to school after Spring Break.

"He hasn't," Sookie scowled.

"I can't say that I blame him," Eric sighed, earning a quick glare from his fiancée. "I am only saying that going fifty years thinking you have no children to finding out you had two and now have three grandchildren is a shock. Plus, there's a lot of money involved, and that can bring out the worst in some people."

"Is this your way of saying you want a prenup?" Sookie asked woundedly.

Eric laughed at Sookie's suggestion, "No, I don't want a prenup. I'm only trying to explain that having so much money divided amongst the family, especially with the head of the family legacy so old, springing this information on them is delicate."

"I thought your parents didn't bring you up on money?" Sookie frowned curiously.

"Just because we weren't spoiled with money doesn't mean we thought we were poor," Eric laughed. "Our father had to pull our mother back from time to time on her spending. I remember one time she totaled her car and bought a new one hoping he wouldn't notice."

"Why wouldn't she tell him? Accidents happen," Sookie tried to defend Eric's mother.

Eric chuckled, "It was the second car she totaled in two years, and she was at fault again. Of course, the insurance still had to pay for the damage to the other car, and the VIN changed on the insurance policy along with the number on the odometer. It's wasn't a very well thought out plan."

When the couple arrived at the farmhouse, their previous conversation about prenups forgotten, Sookie groaned at the vehicle in the driveway. It was Fintan again.

The older gentleman was leaving through the kitchen door when the younger couple pulled up. Sookie saw him give her Gran a quick kiss before he practically skipped down the stairs. The granddaughter had to suppress a scowl as she passed him in the driveway.

"Good evening, Sookie," Fintan greeted. "I just came by to tell Adele that I'm talking to my family next Saturday about all of you-"

Sookie's expression turned sour, and she stormed into the house with Eric on her heels.

"Sookie!" Gran glowed happily. "Fintan's finally telling his family about all of us!"

The young woman paused in her fury. More subdued, Sookie nodded, "Great," and took Eric's hand to drag him to her room.

"I take it," Eric started to speak once the door was shut behind him, "you didn't want your graduation marked by all this?"

"It'll make Gran happy," Sookie flopped onto her bed.

"What if we go back to my house after graduation. That way if anyone shows up, you won't have to deal with them?" Eric suggested as he sat beside her on the bed and began to squeeze her thigh.

"I'd really like that," Sookie confessed as she turned onto her back and looked at Eric with a pout on her lips. "Can I stay with you after school tomorrow?"

Eric grinned, "I'd like that. How about I pick you up in the morning and drive you and Pam to school like the good old days?"

"I don't want you to have to lug my overnight bag around tomorrow," Sookie frowned.

Her fiancé's response was to layer his body over Sookie's and kiss her deeply, "Just bring a toothbrush. Nothing else." Sookie giggled at his statement. "I'm serious, Sookie. You have no idea how much-"

"Sookie?" Gran's voice interrupted Eric's declaration.

"Yeah, Gran?" Sookie called, her cheeks warming at the sensation of Eric hardening against her.

"I'm so sorry, Sookie, I didn't realize next weekend was graduation when Fintan told me. I was-"

"It's okay, Gran!" Sookie called as Eric's hips began to rock against her own.

Adele seemed to realize something private was going on behind closed doors because she gave a brief, "Alright, Dear," and was soon shuffling back to the living room.

Sookie groaned softly as Eric's hips pressed tighter against her.

"Eric," her voice was a warning.

"Please, Sookie?" Eric kissed her neck. It had been over five months since they had made love, and he was not above begging her.

Sookie moaned again when his hands reached up to squeeze her breasts. "Ah!" She jerked when a nipple was tugged. "Gran's just downstairs," she protested weakly.

"I'll be quiet," he promised.

"I don't think I can," Sookie confessed, but her resistance was failing.

Eric's response was to press his mouth to Sookie's as his hands opened her legs to wrap around his hips. Her cry muffled as his rigid length stroked between her folds, separated only by their clothing. Eric pressed harder against her and Sookie broke away from their kiss to pant needfully.

"Ah, okay!" she succumbed and had to hold back a laugh as Eric quickly began pulling her clothes out of the way. Her skirt was flipped toward her chest, her panties pushed to the side, and Eric did little more than unzip his pants to find freedom.

Before his self-control was utterly abandoned, Eric slid down the length of Sookie's body to give the space between her thighs a preparatory lick. He didn't linger there nearly as long as Sookie would have liked, but she was grateful that he helped make his grand entrance a bit smoother.

Without further ceremony, Eric was pressing his cock to Sookie's entrance, and taking little time before filling her completely. Sookie groaned but found her mouth hushed with Eric's lips once again. His hips were bucking furiously against her, pressing his pelvis against her clit with loud slaps.

Soon the bed began to rattle, and Sookie snorted as Eric's hands reached up to hold the frame. Sookie reached above her between the posts and pressed against the wall. The result was a magnified collision of their sexes that would have alerted Gran to the goings on in the bedroom if Eric's tongue wasn't dutifully smothering her noises.

All too soon, Eric stilled above her, and the pleasant pulse of his cock inside of her came in synchronization with her fiancé's soft groan.

"Sorry," Eric panted against her lips before flopping onto his side. "That got you pretty hot, though," he whispered as he pulled Sookie back against his chest. She was settling against him, trembling from unfulfilled passion, and beginning to accept that the coupling had been more for Eric than her.

As Eric began kissing at the back of her neck, Sookie let out a contented sigh that turned into a gasp when Eric pulled her thigh back and over his bent knee. Soon his hand was between her legs and rubbing at her clit with a tried and true technique. In little more than a minute, his free hand clamped over her mouth as a pleasurable cry began to echo with her orgasm and Eric's hand slowed to a halt. His fingers pressed softly between her folds, feeling the intense contractions of her release.

"And you were pouting as if I'd leave you like that, " Eric teased as his hand finally left her mouth, and he stole another kiss. "Mmm, I missed you so much, " he told her happily.

"I'm so glad we're together again, " Sookie whispered. "Every time I'd see you all year, it made me more sad than happy."

"I felt the same, " he assured.

"Don't ever go away again, okay? Not even on a business trip, " Sookie turned to bury her face against Eric's side.

"I'll need to leave you alone sometimes, " Eric grinned. "We don't want to become too codependent, do we?" Deep down, he wanted to never leave her side, but he knew it would hinder her ability to heal. If he was always around to talk for her, she would never do it for herself.

Sookie nuzzled even closer to her future husband. "I guess."

"Have you considered culinary school at all? " he tried to ask nonchalantly but knew that Sookie felt the weight of his question.

"I don't know, Eric, " she confessed. "I don't even know if I have enough drive to do it while I'm still unable to speak freely."

Eric frowned as he began playing with the ends of her hair. "I know I've been pushing the subject from time to time. I guess I'm worried you'll have regrets by not continuing your education. You're just so damned _smart_!"

Sookie's mouth quirked into a small smile. "Would it make you feel better if I went?"

"Maybe, " Eric sighed, shutting his eyes contemplatively.

"In case we need the money?" Sookie wondered.

Eric laughed, "No, we're going to be fine as far as money goes. Even if you convince me to give you _seven_ kids."

"Then why are you fixated on it?" Sookie asked.

There was a long silence before Eric murmured, "What if I die?" Sookie's throat constricted. "Who would you have to talk to? Where will you make friends? If Pam's not living in the area, who are you going to cry with?"

"I don't want you to die," Sookie choked out and squeezed him harder.

"I don't _plan_ on it, Sookie, but we both come from families where our parents died. It's not something I can consider as impossible," Eric tried to explain.

Sookie shook her head, rejecting his notion. She didn't want to plan for these things. Not yet.

"I don't want to talk about this stuff yet," Sookie told him. "Can't we wait a little while after the honeymoon before we start talking about death?"

"Alright," Eric relented. He felt slightly relieved just to have broached the topic at all. It was only fair to give Sookie time to absorb his observations, and hopefully, she would be able to talk about their wills by the time Bobby came by to assist them with such grim preparations.

{†}

"Hey, Gran," Eric came to sit with his future grandmother while Sookie was in her last day of high school.

"Good morning, Dear!" Gran gave Eric a big hug. "I felt terrible not having any dinner for you last night!"

"Don't worry about it, Gran," Eric chuckled as he went inside to sit with Adele and have a discussion he'd been dreading for nearly a year.

"You have quite the look on your face," Gran chuckled. "Do you want some iced tea?"

"Sure, Gran. Thank you," Eric mumbled as he sat at the kitchen table. He wondered if a lot of awkward conversations had taken place here. In his short time with the Stackhouse family, he knew plenty of painful talks had taken place in this room.

"Getting cold feet now that you're home?" Gran teased.

"You know better than to think that," Eric smiled weakly. "I'm not scared about the husband part. I seem to have good stock for being a partner, but…"

Adele smiled knowingly as she poured them each a glass and sat across from Eric. "Ah, the fears of fatherhood?"

"Sookie is just so _sure_ ," Eric moaned. "I don't think I can muster that sort of confidence about it, and I don't know how to assure her it doesn't mean I'm against it!"

Reaching forward, Adele gave his hand a comforting pat. "You'll do fine, Eric."

"How can you be so sure?" Eric placed his hands against the cold glass, but couldn't find a desire to drink it.

"Eric, was your father really so bad?" Adele gently asked.

The young man shrugged, "He wasn't a terror or anything. He was just…"

"Stern?"

"Yeah," Eric frowned.

"Did he tell you he loved you a lot?" Gran asked.

"Yeah, but-"

"But what?" Adele pressed.

"It always felt like a strain for him. Something he said because he knew he was supposed to," Eric grumbled.

Adele took a sip of her tea. "A strain, or painful?"

"I don't know. What does it matter?" Eric demanded.

"Did you ever think that for a man who remembered being abandoned by his mother, it might have been emotional to tell his own children that he loved them?" Adele suggested. "Maybe he remembered the times his mother had said she loved him and then left him behind?"

Eric sighed and shook his head, "You never knew him."

"True, I never knew him, but I had met him," Adele told him.

"You did?" Eric looked up in surprise.

"Your grandmother lived right up the road from me, Dear. Of course, I met your father. Even with the infrequency they visited, you think your grandma never invited me to meet her daughter's husband?" Adele laughed at the idea.

"What did you think of him?" Eric asked.

"I thought he was very stiff," Adele laughed. "He was like a tree 'bout ready to crack in half with a strong storm. Your mama gave him some bend, though. Her smile could break the sternness in his eyes. Her laugh could tug the corners of his mouth upward."

Eric's eyes shut as he considered this and couldn't help his own smile.

"It wasn't fair of him to leave the three of you like he did," Gran continued. "Maybe being left behind like he was, your daddy thought he was doing you a favor not sticking around. It could also be that without the flexibility your mama gave him, he finally got broken in half by the storm. Whatever reason, it's okay to be mad at him, Eric. It's natural for all three of you children to be _mad_ at him, but don't forget the love he had for you. Don't ever stop remembering that your daddy loved you just as much as your mama, even if he wasn't sure how to show it."

"Sookie would come back to life and kill me if I considered leaving our kids like our dad left us," Eric chuckled.

"Don't go killin' off my granddaughter like that, Eric," Gran snapped. "You can't be putting thoughts like that out in the air!"

Eric smiled, "I just want to be prepared for anything."

"It'll never happen, Dear," Gran gave him an apologetic smile. "You can plan until you're blue in the face. You know what they say about making plans?" At Eric's dumbfounded expression, Gran gave a wink. "God laughs at you while you make plans."

"So what do I do?"

"Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and love every minute of what you get," Adele told him. "You two will get married and make babies and love them till they're off getting married and making babies of their own. You'll love them and the babies they make even if none of them turn out the way you'd hoped."

"Aside from the baby part," Eric began slowly, "there's something else I'm concerned about."

"I'm sure there is. There's no getting you out of your head. Sookie is the one with a mental condition, and you're the one I'm always worried about!" Gran joked.

"I'm worried Sookie won't continue her education," Eric told her.

"Does she want to?" Gran asked.

"Not really. If she did, it would be to make me happy," Eric admitted.

"Why would that make you happy?" Gran took another patient sip of her tea.

Eric shrugged, "If something happened to me, I'd like to know that she would have something to get her out of the house and meeting people. I'd like to know that she would have resources to help her cope and help with the kids."

Adele nodded, "Well, no matter where you two end up, I'm sure Sookie will be an active member in her church. You know how she's always trying to be helpful, I'm sure she'd volunteer time to the school as a helper mom. Once she gets into an environment that isn't so harsh on her, I'm sure you'll see some flourishing. She's actually quite sociable, but you know that, don't you?"

Eric let out a long sigh, "Yeah. I do."

"You realize that I was a housewife and stay-at-home-mother, right?" Gran pointed out. "I have plenty of people that I've befriended over the years, and not all of them are from Bon Temps."

"Like Fintan?" Eric raised his eyebrows.

"That was a low blow," Gran chuckled.

Eric smiled to himself and fiddled with glass.

"What I'm trying to tell you is that being a housewife and stay-at-home mother are real work. If it weren't work, then there wouldn't be professions devoted to child care or housekeeping, " Adele explained. "Maybe I'm biased, or even defensive about how I experienced my adulthood. What I do know is at sixty-eight, I feel grateful for the years I devoted to my family, and I have no regrets."

Eric took comfort in Adele's assurances. He had forgotten about Sookie's devotion to the church and all the social aspects of child-rearing. Sookie would interact with teachers and other parents regularly.

Surely Sookie would make some friends along the way.

{†}

Sookie sat awkwardly on the stage for graduation. Being valedictorian had forced her into the limelight, but thankfully no one was expecting a speech from their silent classmate. The young woman would only occasionally glance up from her folded hands and look toward her fiancé, grandmother, and brother as the ceremony continued. Pam was seated with the graduating class of 2002, and the rest of the underclassmen were sitting among their own graduating classes. With such a small school, it was a tradition for the whole student body to see off the graduates.

During the time that she would have given her speech, Sookie was surprised when Dr. Jones rose from his chair a few seats down from her and went to the podium.

"Congratulations, Class of 2001," Dr. Jones began and promptly cleared his throat.

Sookie clutched the front of her robes. If there were one thing she would miss about Bon Temps High School, it was Dr. Jones. From the second she walked through the doors of the school, she had felt like a target. She'd been mocked and bullied, but never down the science hallway. Dr. Jones always stood protectively in front of his classroom door, writing kids up for being rowdy or knocking books from her hands. It only took a week for the freshmen to realize not to pull any crap in front of the Bio teacher.

When the girls in her freshman gym class had taken pictures of her in the locker room, Dr. Jones had spoken to her for the first time outside of the classroom. He offered her a safe haven during her study periods and told her that the library was also somewhere she could go that other kids wouldn't bother her. He'd push her to participate where the other teachers wouldn't bother to acknowledge more than her attendance.

"The most admirable trait of the human species is its desire to protect rather than sacrifice the defenseless and injured of their pack," Dr. Jones' voice broke through Sookie's reverie. "However, the past three years here at Bon Temps, I had my belief in this trait come to doubt," the teacher's voice deepened with emotion. "I watched a bright and forgiving human being bullied, mocked and even _brutalized_ by other humans for being different. What was worse, it wasn't what she wore or how she treated people that lead to this abuse. She couldn't change or hide what made her different, and for those of you that hurt her over the years, I am _ashamed_ of you. I have failed as your teacher these past four years for not having been able to guide you and correct your behavior."

An eerie silence came over the gymnasium as the teacher spoke, and many heads began to hang self-consciously as the principal stared in horror and disbelief at his science teacher.

"Today should have been a day for you to celebrate your accomplishments, but I don't think you deserve that," Dr. Jones growled into the microphone. "Because if you couldn't learn that one simple life lesson here, then I don't know how you managed to earn those diplomas. I hope all of you continue your education. Continue to _learn_ and _grow_ as students and human beings."

With that, Dr. Jones stormed off stage. He knew that he had jeopardized his chances at remaining at Bon Temps High School, but after the treatment the teacher had seen Sookie Stackhouse endure, he wasn't so sure he could come back. When Dr. Jones had received a job at such a small school, the educator had thought he would be able to make a difference and focus on _all_ his students. Instead, he had found a broken disciplinary system that couldn't protect the children.

A rumbling murmur broke out as the teacher was halfway to the exit. When he turned to see what had caused the sudden ripple of sound, he saw Sookie Stackhouse standing at the podium. His legs froze in his retreat, and he found himself staring as well when Sookie reached forward and cupped the microphone in her hands like a butterfly.

As her face leaned forward, he could see even from the current distance that Sookie's eyes were squeezed shut. The evident strain on her face made the man hold his breath, and so did the crowd as it became suddenly hushed.

After a pause, the soft, whisper of, "Thank you," echoed from the speakers and Sookie pulled away from the podium to return to her seat and sit with her head hanging down. She stared at her palms as the color drained from her face. Her shoulders rose and fell sharply as the young woman tried to calm her racing heart.

No one made any objection as Eric Northman walked swiftly through the gym and climbed the steps to stand behind his fiancée. He stayed by her side for the remainder of the ceremony except for her short walk to receive her diploma.

Once graduation had commenced, Sookie was grateful to be swept away by her family and escorted to the car. Classmates tried to stop her, but Eric shoved past them and got her on her way home without further excitement.

Finally, when they were in Eric's car, Sookie led out a relieved sigh.

"I can't believe you did that, " Eric laughed under his breath. "Do you realize that you just spoke in front of nearly three-hundred people?"

Sookie nodded slowly, "Dr. Jones put his career on the line to stand up for me. I had to thank him."

Eric took Sookie's hand in his and gave it a quick kiss. "I could tell he has been holding that in for quite some time. I wouldn't be surprised if he only kept that position until you graduated so he could be there for you."

Something about Eric's remark pleased Sookie. Other than her Gran and the Northmans, no one had ever really treated her like someone who needed to be protected, or deserved that sort of loyalty. Remembering all the prodding and helpful hands Dr. Jones had offered over the years made Sookie feel special in a way that she didn't quite understand. In a word, she would say she felt accepted.

"Who's at my house?" Eric wondered aloud as he pulled up to his front gate. The car was vaguely familiar, but it wasn't until he saw Claudine and her brother that Eric remembered the ride home they had given him a few months before.

"Oh no," Sookie could already see the scowl on Claudine's face. "Fintan told them, and they knew exactly where to go to find me."

"Maybe it won't be so bad," Eric tried to be encouraging, but he didn't feel nearly so confident when he saw Claudine's expression.

As Eric parked off to the side of Claude's car, he hopped out of the car and took Sookie's hand. Claudine only hesitated briefly at seeing Sookie's graduation gown before she quickly closed the distance between them.

"So," Claudine frowned, "we're cousins." Sookie nodded. "Did _you_ know we were cousins?" Claudine demanded of Eric.

"Yes," Eric replied calmly, "but it wasn't my place to bring it up. Fintan wanted to wait until the news of your sister wasn't so fresh."

"Why? Because now I'm _related_ to my sister's murderer?" Claudine shrieked. "Did you ever stop and think that my sister might have been alive in that fucking trunk before your dad dumped her in that lake!?"

"Claudine!" Eric snapped as he put himself between the two women. "Stop taking it out on Sookie. She was barely even eight when that stuff happened."

"She's still related to a murderer no matter if it was her father or uncle that did it!" Claudine shouted angrily.

Sookie nudged her fiancé to move aside so that she could face Claudine. When the two women could see one another, Sookie's hands raised slowly to begin signing.

"She says that she's sorry about your sister," Eric told his friend what Sookie had signed.

Claudine shook her head, rejecting Sookie's condolences. "Whatever. I just came out here to tell you that I'm through with you and your family. You too, Eric. I hope I never see any of you again!"

As Claudine stormed to the car, her brother who had stood quietly on the sidelines sighed and shook his head. "I'm really sorry. I told her not to come out here, but there was no keeping her home, and I didn't want her driving like this. I hope you can forgive her over this because she'll calm down and realize she was an inconsolable bitch."

Sookie placed a hand on Claude's forearm as she walked past him and went to the car Claudine was fuming in. As she sat in the driver's seat, Sookie looked out the side window to pretend Claudine wasn't there.

"I wish, I could gi-ive you answers," Sookie whispered, "but there's nothing I can o-offer you. The b-iggest traumas of both our lives were given to us b-y the same man, and if you wa-ant to talk, I'm a practiced li-istener."

With that, Sookie climbed back out of the car and walked to the front door of Rosenfont Hall.

When his seat was vacated, Claude slipped behind the wheel and looked at his sister patiently. "Well? What do you want to do now?"

Claudine turned away to hide the tears that were ready to fall. "I think we should go home."

"I think you're right," Claude agreed.

"Do you think they'll forgive me?" Claudine asked as her brother shut his door and turned the ignition over.

"Yeah," Claude assured. "I think by the time you guys get back to school, everything will blow over."

"I feel like such an ass," Claudine moaned.

"That's because you _were_ an ass," her brother replied as he backed out of the driveway.

"How can you be so calm about all of this?" Claudine demanded.

Her brother paused at the edge of the road and looked at his sister sourly, "Because I finally have closure about where my sister is. I know that she's dead and I know who took her. The thing you're not considering is that whether Claudette was alive in that trunk when it hit the water or not, Bartlett Hale is the one responsible for her being there. No matter what really went down that day, _he_ is the one I blame for our sister's death."

Claudine lowered her head contritely. "I guess I wanted someone to let my anger out."

"Personally, " Claude confessed, "I'm glad he's already dead. I would have been angrier finding out he's been running around hurting people these past nine years."

"Agreed, " Claudine sighed. "What about Sookie being related to us?"

"I'm envious she didn't have to know grandpa in his tyrannical phase," Claude laughed.

"She, Jason, Linda and Hadley will get the same inheritance as the rest of us, " Claudine pointed out.

"Which would mean something to me if I wasn't still getting close to seven million dollars when the old man finally dies, " Claude rolled his eyes.

"I know you and grandfather haven't always been on the best of terms-"

"Claudine, I have the _worst_ coming out story of all my friends. Most of them got disowned. I was the only one chased out of a house by their grandfather screaming he would beat the faggot right out of my ass while waving his cane around."

Claudine nodded sadly at the memory. It had been three years ago that Claude had come out to the family. Grandfather Niall would be diagnosed with dementia shortly after, and everyone would choose to believe the violent outburst was due to the declining mental health. Claude always believed otherwise.

Uncle Fintan had taken over the estate and assured Claude that his inheritance was well intact. This had come as a relief to Dillon and his wife.

"I hope the Stackhouses give Uncle Fintan a chance, " Claude said suddenly.

"What do you mean?" Claudine asked as she braced her hand against the ceiling of the car when they bounced over a series of potholes.

"I hope they get to have some sort of family connection, " Claude explained. "Uncle Fintan was always the most supportive of my relationships. Even Mom and Dad haven't been all that understanding about it."

"I think they're just both hoping it's a phase," Claudine told him patiently.

"Why can't they just look beyond it and love _me_? What does it matter who I'm attracted to as long as I'm their child and happy? Shouldn't that be the most important thing?" Claude became increasingly upset.

Claudine took her brother's hand, "Yes, that is the only thing that matters, and you shouldn't have to wait for them to come around… You've got me, though, I love you no matter what, and I don't care that you're gay. Sookie and Eric won't care either, and they're your family, too!"

"They won't care?" Claude asked, surprised out of sadness. "I thought Eric was just nice to me to get a ride home," Claude confessed.

"Nope," Claudine shook her head, "his little sister's gay, too."

Claude could only nod instead of verbally reply. He'd made a few friends since becoming old enough to dance at Hooligans, and with most of the male entertainers being gay as well, they all had stories to tell.

However, Claude never really got to talk about the financial burden being gay had brought upon him. He liked cute things and could be a little prissy about the clothing he wore when he wasn't half naked on a stage. This wasn't something he could share with his co-workers, though. None of them danced because they needed a family to belong to. They danced because they had bills to pay.

The young man began to wonder if he would still want to dance if he could find enough family outside of Hooligans. If letting Sookie, her husband, and her husband's sister into his life helped fill some of the voids his sister alone couldn't, would he still need the strip club?

"Claude?" his sister called gently. "Are you okay?"

Claude shook his head to dispel the fantasy of pursuing something beyond shaking his money maker.

"I really want to know the Stackhouses and Sookie's future family," Claude confessed.

Claudine smiled softly, "Yeah. Me too."

{†}

Eric groaned as the doorbell rang insistingly and sat back on his knees between Sookie's legs. After the Crane siblings had left, it had taken a great deal of coaxing to get his fiancée in the mood for sex, and now they were being interrupted _again_.

"Be right back," Eric grumbled, regretting having convinced Godric and Pam to give them the afternoon alone in the house. If one of them had been home, _they_ could have gotten the damned door!

"What!?" Eric snapped as he flung the door open. His eyes widened marginally as he found Fintan standing on the porch, sternly staring at his granddaughter's fiancé. _I should have gotten dressed,_ Eric thought in exasperation at answering the door in his unbuttoned jeans.

Fintan cleared his throat and forced a chuckle, "I was hoping to congratulate my granddaughter on graduating."

"Of course," Eric tried his best to smile. "Please, come in. I'll put the kettle on for some tea," he offered out of nervousness and habit.

"And put on some clothes?" Fintan hinted with just enough humor that Eric felt some of the edginess leave the conversation.

"Yes! Definitely," Eric assured as he guided Fintan to the sitting room and quickly detoured to the kitchen to start heating the water for the impromptu afternoon tea.

Once the kettle was on the stove, Eric dashed back to his room. "Put your clothes back on," Eric told his fiancée while he picked up his shirt and threw Sookie's dress at her.

"I don't think you've ever said that to me before," Sookie commented as she found her underwear and began dressing. "Who was at the door?"

"Fintan," Eric replied as he adjusted his slowly receding erection.

Sookie groaned.

"It's just a cup of tea, and he wants to congratulate you on your graduation," Eric told her as he began smoothing her hair.

With another grumble, Sookie let herself be lead downstairs and waved politely when she entered the sitting room. Fintan rose from his seat and returned the wave.

"Good afternoon, Sookie," Fintan smiled as he sat back down. "I wanted to stop by and say congratulations."

"Mmm," Sookie smiled politely and nodded in thanks.

"How did the rest of the family take it when you told them about the Stackhouses?" Eric tried to break the ice. "Claudine and her brother dropped by, and we had a tense moment with them," he explained at Fintan's confused expression.

"I see," Fintan sighed and shook his head. "It's much more difficult for Dillon's family taking it all in, but I think they'll come around. Dermot and his wife were a lot more understanding. Dermot knew that Addy and I were in love. He was actually the one who helped me deal with losing her."

Sookie's hands flung up, and Eric was surprised at the ferocity of her movements.

"Um, Sookie wants you to know," Eric began to uncomfortably translate, "that you wouldn't have lost Gran if you hadn't chased money."

Fintan sighed, "I made bad decisions, Sookie. You're not wrong about my choosing money over love. I was young and stupid."

"She says you didn't even try to talk it through with your father," Eric mumbled.

"No, I didn't," Fintan agreed. "And I have paid for that cowardice for nearly half a century, Sookie. When I realized that I lost the chance to meet my own son… Sookie, in less than five minutes I found out that I had a son, and that I would never meet him. He never got to know who I was, or that I ever existed."

"As long as you realize that not having your family was entirely your fault," Eric's head was in his hands now, avoiding looking at Fintan as he explained Sookie's signs. "You make it sound like she took something from you, but you could have had it if you hadn't been so greedy for money. Gran doesn't care about the money, she would have wanted you."

The older man nodded in acceptance to Sookie's chastising. Though parts of this had come out during her visit at the estate, Fintan sensed that Sookie was a lot bolder when she could respond freely. A smile tugged at Fintan's lips. He would take Sookie's anger and admonishment all day because it meant she was comfortable doing so. If she could express all these things, Fintan hoped that Sookie would be able to speak to him one day without Eric's help.

"I agree with you wholeheartedly, Sookie, but I hope that doesn't mean you're withdrawing your blessing upon Addy and me?" Fintan asked gently.

Eric was surprised at the change in Sookie's expression. She almost seemed to give a playful pout. "She says you're still welcome in our home. She just wanted you to know the score as she sees it."

"Believe me, Sookie, I know the score quite well," Fintan assured. "I know that I seemed a little short tempered and impatient when we first met, but I'm sure you realize now that I was thinking about more than my secret family."

"Has there been any other developments in the things they found in the car?" Eric asked curiously, piquing Sookie's own interest.

Fintan sighed, "Yes. There was a book in the car. It appears to be a photo album, but the photos are very damaged. Apparently, the negatives were in the album as well and in much better condition. We've had the Bon Temps Police Department send them to New Orleans so the FBI can work some magic on them. Since it involves a child abduction and murder, the FBI is interested in restoring the photos."

A shiver ran down Sookie's spine at the news, and Eric saw her demeanor change. Something in his fiancée's expression made Eric's body tighten as well. He knew that glazed look because the last time it had covered Sookie's face, her dreams had been plagued with nightmares involving the missing day of her life.

Fintan seemed to notice a change in the atmosphere as he quickly gulped the last of his tea and moved to rise. "I should be going. With so much happening for you kids in the next few weeks, I'm certain you need some time to prepare."

Sookie rose as well, wiping reflexively at her cheeks before tugging Eric's shirt. Her fiancé looked over to find her hands moving a mile a minute.

"Sookie wants you to know that the wedding is June seventh and that you and the rest of her new family are all welcome to attend," Eric was just as surprised as Fintan that she would extend such invitations. "We hope you can make it," Eric added once he snapped out of his daze.

"I would love to come," Fintan's smile radiated. Although Sookie implied before that he could attend the wedding as Adele's date, to be officially invited was far more exciting to hear.

The couple walked the older man to the door, and as Eric shut it behind him, he couldn't help but accept that he had been cockblocked once again by Sookie's past. He wouldn't complain about it because he understood the gravity of the things she was dealing with. Still, Eric couldn't resist feeling sorry for himself and his neglected organ.

"I'm sorry," Sookie mumbled as they headed for the bedroom.

"For what?" Eric asked as he cautiously placed his hand on Sookie's waist. He was relieved to find that she was willing to accept his touch this time.

"I'm not in the mood anymore," Sookie confessed.

Eric smiled and kissed the side of her head, "That's nothing to be sorry for."

"I _want_ it, I just don't feel like it," Sookie tried to explain. "I want to be close to you, but I don't think I can get turned on now."

"Sookie, you don't have to explain or justify it," Eric assured her. "We can be close. I'll hold you as tight as I can as long as you need me to."

"I'd really like that," Sookie told him in a high, strangled voice.

"Just don't be upset when I start poking you," Eric tried to tease and relieve some of the tension. Sookie let out a quick bark of laughter as they arrived in his bedroom.

The young woman stripped her clothes off and crawled into Eric's bed, letting out a comforted sigh when his naked body was pressed tightly behind her.

"Try and get some rest," Eric told her. He hoped if she were to have nightmares, she could either become rested now or suffer them early and still sleep properly that evening. Either way, Eric only hoped that she could find some peace.

{†}

Sookie hugged her knees tight to her chest as she tried her best to squish as far under the dashboard as possible. She cupped her hands over her mouth to stifle a giggle. Uncle Bartlett would be so surprised when he couldn't find her. The thought of him calling out for her over and over, and she would be nearby, hidden in his car made another giggle bubble toward her lips.

As laying in wait became boring, though, Sookie tried to find something to occupy herself. She checked the glove compartment for candies but was disappointed to find nothing in it but some camera roll canisters. She knew not to open them and play with the film. Mama had been really upset with her when Sookie had ruined their vacation photos.

Closing the compartment door, Sookie smooshed herself back beneath the dash and grinned when she saw a thick book beneath the passenger seat. She snatched it up and began flipping through what she discovered to be a photo album.

There were pictures of girls her age and a bit older. She even found a couple of her cousin, Hadley. None of the girls were posed or waving to the camera. They all looked to be playing. Hadley was the only one who seemed to know she was being photographed, and she shied away from the camera like always.

As Sookie kept flipping, the photos changed. The girls knew there was a camera. They looked scared. Some of them had no clothes.

Sookie felt her scalp prickle, and her mouth go dry. The foreboding sensation of looking at something private suddenly struck her. She shouldn't be looking at the photo album.

Shutting the book, Sookie looked to where the pages didn't bulge as much so she could see the last page. She hoped that it would be of the girls playing or laughing, but instead it was a solitary black and white picture. Even with the monochrome, Sookie could tell the subject of the photo had dark eyes and dark hair. The eyes were what drew Sookie in. There was a primal fear, a fascination, with the picture. The dilated, half-lidded eyes and the slackened jaw that seemed suspended in a horrified trance.

The strange girl seemed to be screaming at Sookie to run, to not become a page in the book. Sookie could almost hear the word 'run' calling from the vacant eyes and open mouth of the gray girl.

Sookie dropped the album and lurched from the car, screaming as she escaped from the book of horrors.

{†}

Sookie's eyes opened, calmly staring at the ceiling above her. It was darker now, but late afternoon sun turned the white wall a deep amber.

"Eric?" Sookie whispered.

"Hmm?" came her fiancé's sleepy reply. He had found himself dozing as he held Sookie, and had only roused when she shifted so he could smooth her hair from her face.

"I think Claudette was dead before she went into the trunk," Sookie told him.

Eric's eyes opened completely. "What?"

"There was a picture of her on the last filled page of the photo album," Sookie explained as she crawled out of bed and found a notebook and pencil. She wasn't used to sketching humans, but she needed to get the image out of her head into something tangible.

Sookie sketched the picture in her mind until the girl she believed was Claudette became real once again. She drew every feature she could remember, down to the barrette keeping her hair out of her face.

"I was playing hide-and-go-seek," Sookie began to tell him as she stared at her drawing. "I hid in Bartlett's car while he was talking to Gran. I got bored waiting for him to start looking for me, and I found a photo album under the seat of the car." Her eyes glazed over as she remembered what she had seen in that collection. "There were pictures of girls. They were all young, and the first half of the album was candid shots. The pictures looked like surveillance photos from a crime show."

Eric sat up straighter as Sookie told the story. He held his breath as she spoke.

"The photos after that were something out of a horror movie," Sookie whispered. "The girls were naked. Some of them were tied, and others were wearing collars with numbers on them. All of them were crying."

Eric wanted to snap Sookie out of her recollections, but he knew she needed to get it out. So he sat silently, praying the dream would soon end.

"Claudette was in the back of the album," Sookie continued. "There were only two pictures of her. One where she was crying and the other was when she looked like this." Sookie turned the picture to him. "She was gray in my memory because it was a black and white photo. I know she could have just been drugged, and that's why she looks so vacant and limp in the photo, but none of the other girls had a photo like that. They were all awake and alert."

"Sookie-"

"I don't think Claudette was the only girl Bartlett took," Sookie interrupted. "I think he took a lot of girls… I think he sold a lot of girls."

Eric tentatively reached to touch Sookie's shoulder, cautious that she might reject his comfort. He would understand if she recoiled, but was still relieved when Sookie remained calm at the soft pressure of his fingertips.

"Do you want to call Amelia?" Eric offered.

Sookie shook her head, "No, I'm okay."

"Are you sure?" Eric was doubtful.

"Yes," Sookie gave him a sad smile. "It was sad, not scary."

"Do you think you can go back to sleep?" Eric wondered

"Not yet, but I think I'll be able to sleep later," Sookie assured. "Do you want some dinner?"

Eric smiled at Sookie's offer and nodded before crawling out of bed. The pair dressed slowly, and Sookie was grateful to have him beside her. Through all the bad dreams and haunting memories, she knew he would be there. It made remembering bearable. Knowing she would wake up in his arms made it less scary.

As the couple arrived in the kitchen, Eric sat at the breakfast bar as Sookie began to cook a light dinner. She took comfort in the warm, protective gaze that remained upon her. The past could never hurt her with Eric watching.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty-Six: Two Words**

"I do, I do, I do, I do, I do," Sookie chanted in front of the mirror as Gran and Pam flitted about her doing hair and make-up.

"You'll be fine, Dear," Adele chuckled as she followed Pam's instructions with the straightening iron. "It's only two little words, and you managed that much in front of an entire gymnasium of people you didn't like."

"I don't know what the big deal is?" Tara was admiring Pam's work on Sookie's wedding dress, which was waiting on its padded hanger. "It's not like ya gotta recite any vows. Easiest wedding ever."

"Maybe for people who could speak for more than a year," Sookie grumbled.

"Pam, girl," Lafayette was resting his chin on the Northman girl's shoulder as she painted Sookie's face, "don't you want to accent the eyes more?"

"It's a wedding Laf, not a Drag Show," Pam admonished. "I told you that you could do that pouty mouth thing for her lips, but I don't trust you with contouring, and I definitely don't trust you with eyes."

"Bitch, what?" Lafayette fumed playfully. "I do the best cat eyes this side of the Mississippi."

"Cat eyes for a wedding? Maybe if she used to be a _stripper_ ," Pam retorted. "She just needs a little wing to make her eyes look bigger."

Lafayette huffed and flopped onto Sookie's bed until it was his turn with the make-up kit.

As the flames of the latest squabble settled, Sookie let herself be distracted by the gentle tug of her hair and the light touch of a make-up brush against her face. Those little comforts did next to nothing to dampen the memories of last night and the disastrous meeting with Bobby Burnham.

The squat, plump lawyer from New York had seemed so kind and charming. He greeted Sookie with a pleasant smile and hugged each of the Northman children before Godric and Pam left for last minute items for the wedding. With the increased guest list came the necessity for another table and identical settings.

With the back and forth about who was and was not coming from the Brigant Branch of the family tree, the final tally of attendees had come down to the last minute. Sookie had been embarrassed about the complications her family had caused, but Pam had waved off her friend's apologies. The Northman girl was happy to have a wrench thrown into her project for the opportunity to show off her flexibility as an event planner.

After the oldest and youngest Northman was gone, Eric made tea for the three of them, and Sookie listened happily as Eric and Bobby reminisced.

When Eric disappeared to refill the hot water, however, Bobby's pleasant demeanor evaporated. He accused Sookie of gold digging and demanded that she convince Eric to go ahead with a prenup.

Unable to defend herself, Sookie had recoiled like a scolded puppy until Bobby stopped his assault. As Eric reappeared in the sitting room with more water, Bobby transformed back to the kindly lawyer once more.

"Alright!" Pam's hands clapped together near Sookie's face, and the girl was jostled from her recollections. "Your turn, Laf."

"Feet still nice and toasty?" Gran asked with a gentle smile as she finished with Sookie's hair.

"Mmm," Sookie nodded distractedly.

The bride hadn't told her family, let alone Eric about her moment with Mr. Burnham, and it was weighing on her conscience. After everything Sookie had been through the last year, she promised not to try and protect Eric from the things that hurt her. The problem was Sookie wasn't sure if she were scared Eric wouldn't believe Bobby had been mean to her, or that he _would_ believe her and lead to the Northmans losing the last adult they had.

"Are you okay, Sook?" Tara asked as Gran started fixing the combs of the veil to Sookie's head.

"Can I have a minute with Pam?" Sookie asked quietly.

"Of course, Dear," Gran smiled and began shooing Lafayette and Tara out of the room.

"What's up, Sookie?" Pam asked as she pulled away to lean against her friend's vanity. "Did you finally figure out you're too good for my brother?" she teased.

Sookie used all her willpower not to pick at her smooth nail polish. "I've been thinking," Sookie began slowly, "maybe we should have Mr. Burnham draw up a prenup real quick before the ceremony."

Pam's eyes widened at her friend's comment. "You hated the idea of a prenup."

"I know," Sookie mumbled, "it feels like having one means we're not serious about each other. It feels like an escape route, but if it helps other people realize I'm not after the Beauchéne fortune, maybe it's worth it."

"Sookie," Pam sighed, "when your great-grandfather dies, you'll have close to eight million dollars. Sure, it's not _our_ money, but it's plenty enough to prove to others you're not in need of a cash injection."

"I don't know that makes me feel any better," Sookie mumbled.

"What's gotten into you all the sudden?" Pam wondered aloud. "Is this cold feet? You seemed so calm yesterday."

"I don't know," Sookie whispered and cast her eyes downward. "I just can't stand people only seeing dollar signs when they look at us. I know I'm not what people expect Eric to marry with his looks and his money-"

"Oh. My. God! Shut the fuck up," Pam snarled. "You and Eric bring the best out in each other, and that's what a marriage should be like. So, what's the real deal, here? I've never seen you act like this when it comes to your relationship. You've been secure about you and Eric all through his first year of college, and then your wedding day finally comes, and you're acting like you're about to have your mask ripped off?"

Pam leaned away from the vanity and looked into her best friend's eyes. "You've never cared that someone would think you're a gold digger. Who made you think that's what people believe?"

"It must be cold feet," Sookie abandoned the conversation like a coward.

"Uh huh," Pam had her doubts, but she already had a feeling about who had caused this problem. "Well, I think you're stupid considering a prenup now. So, I'm going to get Gran in here to calm you down, and make sure my brother's not turning into as big of an idiot as you."

Pam could hear Sookie sigh as she left the room, but she ignored it and went to hunt down Bobby.

The rotund lawyer was already helping himself to the snack table while the rest of the guests sweated outside.

"Bobby," Pam approached the family friend, "Sookie wants to know if you can draw up a quick prenup." A look of relief came across the man's face. "I told her she can shove that idea right up her ass." Bobby's expression immediately deflated. "At least I know where she got this sudden seed of doubt."

"I'm just trying to protect you kids like I've always done," Bobby insisted in a hushed voice.

"You don't have to whisper for long, Bobby," Pam assured him. "Once they're back from England, I'm going to tell Eric all about you trying to drown his wife in subterfuge."

"Pam," Bobby seemed panicked, "you know what Eric will do if he finds out!"

"I do," Pam nodded. "He'll drop your retainer the second we get our inheritance, and I promise Godric, and I will do the same. Your firm won't handle any of our family's money, and I will happily let the letterheads know why they lost such a huge account and a future client."

"Future client?" Bobby asked in surprise.

"Sookie's worth about seven and a half million on her own," Pam told him. "We would have recommended you as her legal counsel as well, but you can kiss that goodbye." Bobby paled. "Now I might consider sticking with your firm if you _apologize_ to my future sister before she says 'I do,' and you _mean it_."

{†}

Eric stood, waiting outside with the rest of the guests. It was a warm, June morning, and they were doing their best to move things along before the heat went into full swing. Thankfully, the wedding had stayed casual, and he was able to dress in a white dress shirt and slate colored slacks. He'd rolled his sleeves up after twenty minutes in the heat, and the guests had begun fanning themselves beneath the linen canopy. Tara and Lafayette had just joined the guests, and Eric had to chuckle when the black man made himself cozy next to Claude.

Relief came over the groom's face when he saw his sister wave from the front entrance of the farmhouse. Next, he watched as Pam picked up her viola and began playing Canon as she strolled toward the end of the aisle until she was standing beside her brother.

Once Pam was in her place, the front door of the house opened again, and Sookie appeared in a form-fitted dress that stopped just below her knee. Adele was beside her granddaughter as they strolled toward the temporary altar.

Eric's smile widened with every step his bride came closer to him. He felt his hands shaking in an effort not to reach for her, but his willpower failed him. Eric took a half-step toward Sookie and extended a hand for her making both Adele and the bride grin.

"So eager," Adele chided as she placed Sookie's hand in Eric's and cupped their joined hands. "Bless you both."

Adele hobbled to her chair between Jason and Fintan as Eric raised Sookie's veil over her face. She was glowing, and her eyes were already watering.

"You look amazing," Eric told her as they turned toward the Reverend.

" _You too,"_ Sookie mouthed with a grin.

"Good morning, friends and family of this young couple," the Reverend began with a broad grin. "Today we gather together to celebrate the beginning of their journey as husband and wife and offer our prayers for happiness, health, and love.

"Now, to get us out of this heat," the Reverend joked, "let's begin. Eric, do you take this woman to be your wife; to love her, to cherish her in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad as long as you both shall live?"

Eric gripped Sookie's hands before accepting the ring the officiant offered. "I do," he announced as the young groom slipped the band over his bride's finger.

"Sookie," he addressed the young woman next, "do you take this man to be your husband; to love him, to cherish him in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad as long as you both shall live?"

Taking a deep breath, Sookie stared into Eric's eyes, she waited for a beat to gather all of her focus until the spectators melted away. Finally, she took the ring from the Reverend and choked out, "I do-oo."

"By the power vested in me by the church and state of Louisiana, I now pronounce you husband and wife," the Reverend announced before turning to Eric. "You may now kiss your bride."

Eric leaned in, grasping the back of Sookie's neck in that familiar way that brought calm to her heart. Sookie felt her face being drawn in and finally met her husband's lips with her own. She could feel Eric stroke her earlobe with his thumb as they lightly kissed before their families and friends. When the clapping grew thunderous, Sookie pulled away and flushed at the amount of attention their kiss was receiving.

"Why am I not surprised that you are a blushing bride?" Eric teased.

Sookie swatted his chest playfully as everyone headed indoors to get their hands on some food and escape the increasing heat. Although there was only a small window unit for an air conditioner in the kitchen, the moderate drop in temperature and humidity was welcome to the attendees.

"You seem a lot calmer," Eric noted as they arrived in the kitchen, standing as near the cold air as possible. The newly married man couldn't seem to stop touching his wife. His fingers would caress her cheek, or hold her hand or waist at every opportunity.

"Mmm," she replied as she leaned her head against her husband's chest and shut her eyes. Despite Bobby's hushed apology for yesterday's outburst, that wasn't what eased her mood.

The thing that brought the young woman comfort was that after a year of pure hell, she was finally married to Eric Northman, and she would never be forced to stand anywhere without him again. She could go wherever he went, and no one could stop her.

"There's something I need to tell you," Sookie whispered uncomfortably.

"What's that?" Eric smiled, still reveling at the reality of having a wife. His hands were running up and down her arms, taking in the moment in as many ways as he could.

"I don't like Bobby," Sookie told him. She didn't want to mention the prenup, but she wouldn't pretend to like the lawyer. "I don't want him helping us with our wills."

Eric frowned. It wasn't like Sookie to say that she didn't like someone that she had only just met. The fact that Sookie had been anxious since meeting Bobby only fueled Eric's concerns. Sookie had a habit of working things out on her own before discussing them. She didn't like to make a fuss over trivial things unless they genuinely affected her.

"What did Bobby say to you?" Eric asked gently.

"He implied he didn't trust me, and I don't want someone who thinks the worst of me handling my legal affairs," Sookie told him.

Eric nodded in understanding, "Okay. When we get back from England, I'll call the law firm and see if I can get our account handled by someone else."

"I'm sorry," Sookie whispered.

"Don't be sorry, Sookie," Eric smiled. "If Bobby made you feel that he didn't trust you, then he doesn't trust my judgment either. Either way, it wasn't his place to talk to you like that."

"But you've known him so long," Sookie mumbled.

"As a lawyer, Sookie," Eric shook his head. "Bobby's job is to get me out of trouble, not protect me from trouble. Don't worry about it. I'm glad you told me."

"I promised I wouldn't hide things from you," Sookie reminded him. "I just needed some time to sort it out for myself."

"I know," Eric leaned in and kissed her lips. "I'm glad you told me."

"You're not upset or mad?"

"I am," Eric nodded. "I'm angry that Bobby would say something about prenups when I told him last year that we weren't interested in having one. I'm upset that he hurt your feelings."

"I just thought you guys were closer than this," Sookie admitted.

Eric let out a sigh as his traitorous fingers began playing with a tendril of Sookie's hair. It really was impossible to keep his hands to himself.

"I liked Bobby because he's a good lawyer," Eric told her. "He let his emotions get the better of him, and he worked against my wishes. If I can't trust him to follow my directions, then he's not as good at his job as I thought."

"Sometimes," Sookie cast her eyes downward, "I forget that you're not as nice to everyone else as you are to your siblings and me."

Eric's smile grew into a grin, "That's because I _love_ you. I love my brother and sister. Hell, I even love Gran. Your brother… I'm warming up to him."

Sookie finally smiled. "I'm glad to hear it."

The newly married man glanced around the kitchen, surprised to find that they were ignored entirely for the food. He thought couples were customarily hounded all throughout the reception, but everyone seemed content to mingle by the buffet table and leave them to the loud AC unit.

"Are your bags all packed?" Eric asked, impatient to get out of the house. He wondered if they'd be able to sneak back to his family's home for a quickie before the flight.

"Mmm," Sookie choked when a strange young woman came to greet them. Sookie accurately guessed it was a relative from Fintan's side of the family.

"Hello there," the redhead extended a hand, "I'm Sophie-Anne. I'm Dermot's step-daughter."

"A-a pleasure," Sookie shook the offered hand.

"That was the quickest and _best_ wedding ceremony I've ever had to sit through," Sophie-Anne smiled happily. "And the food is amazing! Who catered?"

Sookie swallowed hard and gestured to her grandmother who was cheerily handing out plates. "Gran."

"Wow," the new relative mumbled. "You guys really kept it simple. I'm impressed! Although, I bet Uncle Fintan would have sprung for you guys to have better if you'd wanted."

"We always had a small and intimate wedding in mind," Eric explained. "In fact, the reception is just our way of saying 'thank you' to everyone for making the trip for such a short event."

"Well, I think it's wonderful," Sophie-Anne patted Eric's arms reassuringly, and something in her tone made Sookie feel patronized. The young bride didn't take it personally, though. Judging by her cousin's jewelry and dress, it was evident that the redhead was used to having money.

Eric's smile tightened, "Thank you. He was diplomatic because it was Sookie's family, but also because Elfyria Mergers and Acquisitions had to be his top choice of companies he hoped to work for after graduation. For a while, he thought it would be a long-term goal because the resource pool was gigantic with many sharks swimming through it. Now that he was married to the granddaughter of one of the chairmen, the opportunity didn't seem so impossible.

After Sophie-Anne departed, Eric and Sookie soon realized that the young woman had broken the dam of people wanting to offer their well-wishes. Sookie's new family members were the first to congratulate them.

Claudine approached with her brother Claude, "Thanks for inviting us, Sookie," the young woman smiled cautiously. "Especially after everything I said."

Sookie's mind fumbled for the shortest response she could utter, and a, "Thanks," was all she could muster. The queue of people behind her was daunting.

"We knew you were going through a tough time," Eric assured. "I'm glad we are already moving on."

Claude grinned, "Definitely, plus, having you in the family is taking a load off the rest of us."

"How's that?" Eric asked in surprise.

"Your major," Claude said pointedly. "Our grandfather's been furious that he only has step-grandkids working for the firm. Even though you're the husband of a grandchild, it'll still be blood that you make with her."

Eric thought that was a very old-fashioned idea, but it worked nicely for him. "I haven't seen your grandfather here."

"He's got early onset dementia," Claudine offered. "We were worried the wedding would confuse him and he'd make a scene. He still has a lot of good days, but when he's upset or confused, he's very quick to get, uh, mean."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Eric offered.

"It's fine," Claude grunted. "We better let you guys get through this line of people, so you don't miss your flight."

Eric and Sookie waved goodbye to the twins as they returned to the buffet table.

"Sookie," Fintan approached with two men. One was about Fintan's age, but the other seemed half as old. "These are my brothers, Dermot and Dillon," her grandfather-by-blood introduced.

"It's good to meet you officially," Dermot nodded stiffly.

"Thanks," Sookie smiled tensely.

"I've wanted to thank you," Dillon took Sookie's hand and squeezed it. "And, I wanted to tell you that because the things you remembered about that photo album, the FBI has been able to identify several missing girls and are looking for them now instead of presuming them dead. Also," Dillon took a deep breath, "we called in an expert of spinal cord injuries, and she told us that Claudette's broken neck was too clean to have occurred in the trunk of that car. She was dead before it went into the water."

Sookie felt the blood drain from her face as Dillon kept speaking, and her hand gripped Eric's tighter and tighter.

"Dillon," Fintan interrupted gently, "I think any more news about that can wait a while."

The younger brother seemed to shake himself out of a trance, "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me."

Sookie swallowed hard and released Eric's hand to pat Dillon's. "You're grieving."

Dillon sighed, "I suppose so." After eight years, the father thought he had cried as much as he possibly could for his daughter. It always surprised him when he found himself wander past Claudette's bedroom door and peeking inside. There was still crippling anguish that followed when she wasn't there, safe in her bed. The tears would always follow. Sometimes it was a fleck of water he could blame on the dust. Other times, he would weep without inhibition.

Dermot cleared his throat to break up the intense atmosphere, "We actually wanted to discuss something with you two in private?"

"Right," Fintan gestured to the back porch, and the young couple followed the three brothers. Once they were out of earshot of the rest of the partygoers, Fintan smiled at his granddaughter. "My brothers and I have spoken, and we thought a young couple just starting off together could use a little help. Since you didn't receive all the benefits of being part of this family growing up, we brought you this as a wedding gift."

Fintan extended his hand to Sookie, and the bride took the piece of paper she was offered. When Sookie looked at the writing, she found a Cashier's Check for $500,000.00.

The young woman's breathing shortened as she handed the check to her husband, and she flopped into the wooden rocker by the window.

"This is very generous of you," Eric was far less intimidated by the amount, "but we have plenty of money, and even more coming to us in a few years."

"Of course," Fintan nodded. "Sookie's inheritance is-"

"I was speaking of _my_ inheritance," Eric explained. "My siblings and I are on a monthly stipend from our estate until all three of us graduate with a bachelor's degree. After that, we receive our full inheritance."

Dermot seemed pleased to hear this, "Then Sookie would want to opt out of her claim on our estate?"

Eric's jaw tightened, "I was hoping to convey that she isn't in need of money and that buying her affection was moot. Trying to deny her what she is legally entitled to or dissuade her from seeking it was not my intention at all."

"Dermot, your step-children are already seen to in the will," Dillon snapped. "This isn't the time or place for your underhanded bullshit."

"I agree," Eric nodded.

"It wasn't my intention to buy off Sookie," Fintan told the groom. "I just wanted to do something for the two of you. An olive branch from her new relatives in response to the one she extended to us through the invitation to the wedding."

"We accept," Sookie uttered after she had absorbed the meaning of the gift. "And we appreciate it." She was looking at Fintan with a tentative smile. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Fintan returned her smile and then gestured to his brothers. "Let's get back to the party and let them finish their reception line."

Sookie and Eric followed the brothers back to the kitchen. When they returned, the line had grown a bit, and now all the remaining attendees were there. Eric looked at his watch and realized that they were running a bit behind.

They quickly thanked the Reverend, Tara, Lafayette, Mrs. Crane, and Mrs. Brigant. Sookie gave Hadley a big hug, and her Aunt Linda hugged both Sookie and Eric. Quinn and Alcide approached at the same time, both looking like the other was their lifeline amidst the family dynamics. Alcide had been avoiding Claudine's family like the plague, feeling it was too soon in their relationship to deal with such a scene at a wedding of all places.

"Ready to head to the airport?" Alcide asked uncomfortably.

"Mind giving me a ride too?" Quinn asked hopefully. He'd detoured to Shreveport rather than going straight to Colorado.

"I guess that's fine," Alcide looked curiously at the newlyweds.

"We're going to change at my house really quick," Eric told them.

"Yeah," Alcide snorted, "quick."

Sookie responded with rolling her eyes before walking away to find her brother and gran to say goodbye.

"Seriously, though," Eric's eyes were intense as he glared at his two friends, "we have to stop by the house before heading to the airport."

"You better be a minute man, Eric, 'cause otherwise, you're missing your plane," Alcide pointed out.

"We can be quick when we have to," Eric grinned as the three of them headed toward the kitchen door for an easy escape. The groom saw his bride weave her way back to him, and Eric took Sookie's hand as they slipped out the back.

"I can't wait to get to England," Eric told his wife happily as the four of them jogged down the gravel driveway to Alcide's truck. The short ride to Rosenfont Hall spoke of a half an hour of torture for Eric when they would soon drive to Shreveport. A truck cab was not built for three men all over six feet tall.

As the young couple spilled out of the truck to grab their luggage, Eric took Sookie's hand and pulled her toward his old bedroom.

"Okay," he stripped off his shirt, "I can't survive a twelve-hour flight without-"

"Shh," Sookie's fingertip pressed against her husband's lips as he finished peeling off his shirt. Her dress was already on the ground, and her free hand was already working the fly of his slacks.

"I'm glad we're on the same page," Eric grinned as he reached his arms around Sookie's waist and pulled her to him. Sookie gave a quick hop to wrap her legs over Eric's hips and giggled happily as they flopped onto the bed together.

With quick movements, Eric had the remainder of his clothing tossed aside, and Sookie wiggled out of her undergarments. As their bodies were about to join, Eric heard the horn of Alcide's truck sound, and he rolled his eyes while simultaneously coupling with his wife.

"If they can make it that fast, I'm worried about their sex lives," Eric grumbled as his hips began to rock.

Sookie laughed beneath him, twisting her hips to hit that sweet spot upon collision. She groaned and sighed until she finally found the angle she was seeking. After that, the sound of her panting breath filled the air, and Eric became lost in the music of her excitement.

As her inner walls began to flex, Eric reached between them to push Sookie over the edge, ready to follow her.

"Yes, yes, yes," Sookie chanted before her back arched off the bed and her body coiled tightly. Her mouth went silent, and she held her breath at the release, and Eric allowed himself to be welcomed into his own climax as Sookie jerked with pleasurable aftershocks.

"Mmm, no time to glow, Sookie," Eric mumbled as he straightened back up. "We have to catch a plane."

"I just need to freshen up," Sookie told him as she shimmied off the bed and ran to the bathroom.

Eric chuckled as he followed her so he could wipe himself down. Trapped in a plane while body fluids dried on his skin didn't seem appealing.

Grabbing up a change of clothes for the both of them along the way to the bathroom, Eric gave Sookie's shoulder a kiss as he set the outfits on the counter and reached for a washcloth.

Soon the couple was clean and redressed. Eric grabbed their bags, and Sookie opened the doors for him as they headed back to the truck. With an unceremonious fling of the bags into the bed of the vehicle, Eric and Sookie were soon shoved once again in the back of the cab.

After some good-natured ribbing from Alcide and Quinn, the four were on their way to Shreveport. Soon, they would be airborne and begin their honeymoon.

Eric couldn't wait to show Sookie his old haunts and explore all the things he had missed while living in London.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty-Seven: Interlopers**

Eric smiled to himself as he practically had to carry his new wife off the plane. The flight attendants gave him pitying smiles as the drugged woman could hardly move her legs.

"Would you like me to get you a wheelchair?" An attendant at the gate asked kindly.

"I'm okay," Sookie sighed sluggishly.

"She should be coming out of it soon. Thank you," Eric smiled pleasantly before refocusing on his wife.

Take off had been nerve-wracking for Sookie, and Eric berated himself at forcing her on such a long flight when she had never flown a day in her life.

"I'm sorry," Sookie mumbled.

"Don't be sorry," Eric crooned. "I should be sorry for putting you through something that stressful. I should have chosen to do a summer semester somewhere closer."

"Thanks for grabbing my Xanax," Sookie leaned her head against Eric's shoulder as she shut her eyes. He had put twice her former dose in her hand when Sookie had broken into a sweat and begun to hyperventilate.

"Thank you for not throwing it out," Eric replied with a smile.

"Amelia convinced me to keep it full for emergencies," Sookie told him. "She upped the dose to handle bad attacks as needed."

"How long does it keep you like this?" Eric asked as he remained crouched in front of his wife, rubbing her knees and thighs soothingly.

"Mmm," Sookie tried to remember her first time taking a dose as large as this one. "Maybe ten or twelve hours."

Eric let out a relieved sigh. Sookie's coherency was already coming back, and he was grateful to know that she was already past the active period of the drug. She was apparently experiencing the climb back to alertness.

"Do you think you can walk a bit?" Eric asked. "We have to get through customs, and then we can grab some food over there," he gestured to the food court.

"Okay," Sookie let herself be pulled back to her feet.

Together, the young couple made their way through customs and had their passports stamped. Afterward, they headed to a food cart and split a salad. Finally getting some food in his wife's stomach, Eric was happy to see her perk up.

"Feeling better?" Eric asked as he cleared away their tray.

"Much," Sookie assured, feeling embarrassed about her display on the airplane. "Was everything alright once I passed out?"

Eric smiled and brought her hand to his lips. "Yes, you slept like a baby the whole rest of the way."

"I can't believe I made such a scene," Sookie frowned as her eyes cast downward. She had never been prone to anxiety _attacks_ before starting her medication, but she realized it was probably because she used to experience a perpetual state of nervousness up until that point.

"It wasn't nearly as bad as you think," Eric assured her. "Since we were in first class, hardly anyone knew what was going on except the flight attendants."

 **"** Really?" Sookie asked hopefully.

"I promise," he gave her a reassuring smile. "And now we know to drug you before takeoff on the return trip."

Sookie gave playful pout before accepting his wise words. She still felt silly for her reaction to the flight, but Eric didn't seem bothered.

"Maybe while we're here we can try a short plane ride to France?" Eric offered. "The length of the trip might have been what got to you."

"I don't know," Sookie confessed. "It just came on me so suddenly."

"We had a very long day," Eric reminded. "We got married, the Brigants bombarded us with money and news, you went on your first flight which just happened to be an international one…"

"Okay, it was a long, stressful day," Sookie accepted.

"And you're already sensitive to stress," Eric added. "Stop being so hard on yourself."

"I just want to be a normal wife for you," Sookie mumbled.

Eric paused in their stroll through the airport and pulled Sookie into his arms, "Sookie, I wouldn't have married you if I wanted you to transform yourself. We'll both change over time, but we'll do it together. Just keep talking to me like this. Tell me what scares you, and I'll protect you from it."

Sookie smiled in relief. "You are amazing, you know that?"

"I had my suspicions," Eric teased with a wink.

Leaning her head against Eric's arm, Sookie wrapped herself around the appendage as they made their way onto the street.

"How long do we get to stay in London?" Sookie asked.

"My semester starts on the seventeenth, and it's the ninth. We'll probably leave for Sussex on the fifteenth so we can get settled into the apartment before my orientation," Eric rattled off.

"It's the eighth," Sookie frowned.

"No, it's the ninth. We lost a day traveling," Eric reminded.

"Wait, what time is it _our_ time?" Sookie asked suddenly.

Glancing at his watch, Eric replied, "About four A.M."

Sookie groaned, "Oh no, I _already_ screwed up my birth control." She had been working her time for her pill back for the past week so she wouldn't mess it up with the time change, and now the bride discovered she was already off the new schedule thanks to the knockout her prescription had given her.

Eric chuckled to himself, "You can take it now."

"You don't seem worried," Sookie frowned.

Her husband shrugged, "What will happen will happen. There's no use worrying about it now."

Sookie's jaw slung open, "Something you didn't plan for happened and you're not a wreck?"

Eric laughed again, "You really think I didn't consider the possibility we could lose track of your prescription routine with that big of a time change?"

"I'm confused," Sookie admitted.

As they came to a crosswalk, the pair stopped to wait for the light to change.

"Sookie, I'm not so scared about when the parenthood part of our marriage happens anymore," Eric confessed. "After everything that we went through this year, it's hard to be scared about something so beautiful. With the way things went down between Fintan and Gran, I'm already considering the idea we should stop using birth control altogether. At least if there's a problem, we'll know about it now and can make alternative plans."

Sookie's jaw gaped even further as she stared up at Eric in surprise, "I just can't believe you're the man I agreed to marry. Who are you? Where's my husband?"

Eric leaned down to hug his wife tightly. "I had a lot of time to myself to think on the plane. The money your… The money that Fintan gave us plus my monthly stipend is _more_ than enough to start a family and live beyond comfortable while I finish school. I could even take fewer classes a semester and spend time with you and the baby without it affecting us financially."

"Eric," Sookie choked, "if you're not completely serious right now-"

"I am entirely serious," Eric assured her. "If you want to forget about your birth control, I'm ready when you are."

Sookie took a deep breath and distracted herself with the fact the light to the crosswalk had changed. When no one moved to cross, Sookie looked to her left and took a step past the curb.

"Sookie, wait!" Eric snapped and pulled his wife back by the strap of her dress as a little coop zipped through the intersection.

"WANKER!" someone amongst them shouted after the motorist who had blown through the red light.

"In the UK, Sookie," Eric reminded her as the color slowly came back to his face, "the traffic is going to come from the opposite direction."

Sookie nodded, stunned at the red blur that had nearly hit her.

"Are you alright?" Eric asked.

"Yeah," Sookie nodded again.

"Let's get to the hotel and rest a bit. Then we can grab some more food," Eric told her.

{†}

Eric was quick to pass out once they arrived at the hotel and checked in. Sookie was convinced it was because he had to take care of his mentally unstable wife for the last fourteen hours.

 _I wonder if he slept at all on the plane?_ Sookie began unpacking their luggage to feel more settled in for the next few days.

Although Sookie felt like she'd been bumbling through the past twenty-four hours, it was comforting to know that her husband didn't seem put off by her. Even when he'd pulled her out of the way of the car, he didn't seem angry about her lapse in judgment.

 _And I_ knew _that they drive on the other side here!_ Sookie bemoaned the incident. Muscle memory had worked against her, and she had instinctively looked to the left and began taking her step before glancing to the right. If Eric hadn't anticipated she would do that, she could have spent her honeymoon in the hospital. Worse yet, Eric could have spent his honeymoon as a widower!

Lastly, there was the real thing keeping her awake other than the near-death experience. Eric had told her he was ready to start trying for kids whenever she was. In reality, Sookie's birth control was burning a hole in her pocket, but after spending a year apart, she wanted time with just the two of them. If her mishap with her pill brought a bundle of joy into their life, she would love it and be grateful, but Sookie wasn't ready to give up their first year together for nausea, mood swings, and swollen body parts.

Going to the bathroom where she'd put their toiletries, Sookie grabbed her compact and popped her overdue pill in her mouth.

With their clothing put away and her birth control routine restarted, Sookie stripped out of her dress and crawled into bed beside her husband. As if he was waiting for her to join him, Eric's arms wrapped instinctively around Sookie, and the young woman smiled to herself as she let herself rest naturally. She doubted she would be able to fall asleep after her Xanax induced coma, but the act of shutting her eyes felt like a relief.

When the sound of Eric's even breathing had lulled Sookie into a half-slumber, her mind filled with images of babies. Not just any babies. They were undoubtedly Northman offspring. Blond hair and blue eyes filled her vision, and Sookie found her lips tugging into a bemused smiled. Every one of them was a boy. One, two, three, four, five. Five little children scuttling around in different phases of life. The boys seemed to range from eight to zero, judging by the little bundle in her arms.

"What are you dreaming about, Sookie?" Eric's voice murmured in her ear.

"Mmm, babies," Sookie mumbled. "I was daydreaming. I wasn't asleep."

"I see," Eric smiled.

"What time is it?" She wondered as she opened her eyes.

"Almost two in the afternoon," Eric replied. "I slept quite a bit on the plane, I just needed a pick-me-up."

"You managed to sleep with the chaos I caused?" Sookie teased.

"Once you were out, I knew you'd be fine," he taunted right back. "So, you were dreaming about babies?"

"I took my pill," Sookie told him.

"Really?" Eric was surprised to hear her decision.

"I want a year of the two of us being Eric and Sookie Northman," Sookie explained simply. "I was thinking I could stop taking it on our one year anniversary?"

"What if," Eric's eyes lit up with an idea, "we do a second honeymoon during our anniversary? Something nearer home and we can practice making babies the whole time?"

Sookie giggled at his suggestion, "I like the sounds of that."

"It's a deal," Eric gave her a lingering, slow kiss. He wondered if this plan would go any smoother than the others they had made in the past.

"Are you still keeping me restricted to three babies?" Sookie wondered.

Eric brushed his nose against the bridge of hers. "How about we keep going until I give you one of each or until you say stop? Whichever comes first?"

Sookie's mind filled with the daydream of the little boys running around. "What if I have one of each right away and I only get two?" she pouted, though she had faith in her fantasy.

"What if you give me five girls?" Eric pointed out. "Then I get to deal with six menstruating women for the rest of my life."

Swatting at his chest, Sookie pointed out, "I'm not mean on my period."

"No, you're not," Eric agreed as he leaned in for another kiss. "You're miserable and can't stand to be touched for the first two days. Those are sad days for me."

"You can rub my back," Sookie offered, batting her eyelashes. "I just don't like being hugged."

"You're weird," Eric chuckled as he stole a kiss from her lips.

"We know this," Sookie agreed as her lips moved against his mouth. "Mmmph!" she huffed as his fingers began to rub between her legs.

"Baby dreaming made you this wet?" Eric asked in confusion.

"Ah!" she squirmed as his fingers wiggled briefly against her clit. "No, being in bed, naked, with my husband kept me this wet."

"Kept you wet?" Eric liked the sound of that. "How long have you been turned on?"

Sookie's face reddened, "Since you said I could go off my birth control."

Eric laughed harder at her reply as he layered his body over hers. "Then you _are_ turned on by baby making."

"I guess," She grumbled in defeat.

Eric settled between his wife's legs and allowed himself to sink deep inside without further preparation. "I love that you're always ready to welcome me home."

Sookie giggled, "I'm glad that this is your home."

Their mouths fused after that, and Eric enjoyed capturing her little moans and gasps with his lips. Sookie's body rolled beneath his, her hips twisting for the most pleasurable angles. She would happily spend their days in London doing nothing but this!

{†}

"Good afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. Northman," the hotel manager nodded at the newlyweds. An excited blush came over the young bride's face, and the manager couldn't help but smile as well. It was nice to see a woman so happy about her new name. He had only seen them once since their arrival, and it had been Sunday morning when the husband had asked where they might find the nearest Baptist Church. Since then, the manager hadn't been surprised not to see them again.

"Good afternoon," Eric nodded back as a grin split his face.

"Hi," Sookie offered as well, surprised by how easily the word sprung from her lips.

With no Xanax over the past two days spent in their hotel room, Sookie didn't think she'd be able to utter a word to a stranger.

 _Holy moly!_ Sookie thought in near shock. She didn't feel any sort of pressure to speak. It bubbled forth almost naturally. Sure, a few holdbacks to her years of silence encouraged her to merely nod and smile, but her throat didn't tighten when the young woman moved to speak.

"That sounded rather natural," Eric commented as he held the door open for his wife as they exited the hotel.

"It felt natural," Sookie confirmed. "Strangely natural."

"Maybe it's because no one here knows your life story? The pressure isn't as strong?" he guessed.

"Maybe?" Sookie tentatively agreed before shaking her head and disregarding the possibilities. "What's on our agenda now that we've finally left our room?"

"That depends on you," Eric grinned down at her. "Do you want me to take you to the tourist circuit, or do you want to see my old hangouts?"

"Your old hangouts!" Sookie decided without a second thought.

The pair spent the early afternoon at a shabby diner, and Eric told Sookie about the times he had there with his old 'mates.'

"There was Rose," Eric began ticking off his finger, "who was seeing Steve. He was in a band with Miles, Jimmy, and Davie. I was friends with Rose first, actually, and she introduced me to the rest of them."

"How did you meet Rose?" Sookie wondered.

"Don't laugh at me," Eric mumbled.

"I would never," Sookie was already smirking.

"We met at a tattoo and piercing shop that's right up the street," Eric confessed.

"You don't have any tattoos or piercings," Sookie remarked with a frown.

"Yeah," he looked gloomy.

"That's a story in itself."

"Godric found out where I went and dragged me out by my ear," Eric told her.

Sookie snorted on a laugh just visualizing the shorter brother snatching Eric by the ear and leading him back out of a tattoo parlor.

" _Anyway_ ," Eric grumbled, "she spotted me at school the next day and said her friend could do my piercing for me if I were still interested. I said 'sure,' and went home with her. That's when I met the band that practiced in the garage next door. We all got to talking and forgot all about the piercing."

"Wow," Sookie chuckled. "Why were you getting your ear pierced anyway?"

"I was hoping to get Hep C," Eric grinned.

" _What_?" Sookie gawked.

"To disqualify me from joining the military," Eric told her. "I spent weeks finding the dirtiest, cheapest shop to better my chances."

"You were going to destroy your liver just so you wouldn't have to stand up to your father?" Sookie demanded.

"Sookie," Eric sighed, "I'm kidding. I wanted to get a piercing because I was bored and new in town with no one to hang out with. When I met Rose and her crew, I wasn't bored anymore."

Shaking her head at his reasoning, Sookie rose from her seat, "I'm going to use the washroom."

"Hurry back to me," Eric grinned as she walked away.

As he waited for his wife to return, Eric busied himself with watching the passersby beyond the window of their booth. Everyone was bustling around on their lunch breaks or enjoying their summer holiday.

A shock of pink hair made Eric jolt in his seat. Of all the colors to see on someone's head, it felt impossible to think it would be that _one_ person.

Jumping from his seat, Eric ran out the door and shouted, "ROSE!? ROSE GREEN!?"

The pink head turned, and the familiar face of his friend split into a broad grin. "Eric Northman!" Rose shouted as she ran back the way she had come and flung her arms around Eric's neck. "Where have you been, Mate?"

"Everywhere, Rosie," Eric held her tighter for a moment before pulling away. "You got a minute?"

"No," she groaned. "Here," She took Eric's hand and reached in her bag simultaneously. "My work number. Call me after nine. Okay? I'll let the boys know you're home when I get back to the shop, and we'll throw you a welcome home party!" She pulled a pen out of her mammoth of a purse and wrote down her phone number. "I can't believe it's you! Come out and see us tonight!"

Rose spun on her heel and began running down the street, apparently in a hurry to get back to work.

Eric shook his head as he walked back into the diner just in time to see Sookie returning to their table. She looked around worriedly before spotting her husband and letting out a relieved sigh.

"Here I thought you'd already abandoned our marriage," she joked as she sat back in her seat.

"No, you won't believe it, though," Eric grinned at her. "Guess who I saw on the street while you were in the toilet?"

"Washroom, please. Have manners," Sookie groaned.

"Rose!" Eric ignored her request.

"The Rose you were just telling me about?" Sookie was equally surprised.

"The very same, and she wants us to drop by later tonight," Eric held out his hand, showing his wife the phone number.

"Our first day out as man and wife, and you're already getting other women's phone numbers," Sookie sighed and rolled her eyes.

Her husband smirked, "Yes, that's exactly how it happened."

"So, we're meeting up with Rose?" Sookie asked.

"And it sounds like the other guys are still around. She said she would throw me a coming home party," Eric continued happily.

"Oh, is it alright that I'll be there?" Sookie wondered.

"Sookie," Eric sighed, "like I would go without you?"

"Fair enough," Sookie laughed as they paid their bill and headed out onto the streets once more. "I hope I'll be able to speak well tonight."

"We'll just tell them you're shy," Eric shrugged. "Believe me, if Jimmy's there, you won't have to say a word. The guy never shuts up."

The couple spent the rest of the afternoon wandering the city, stopping by a few monuments for pictures as they walked nearby, and Sookie tried her hand at speaking to a few shopkeepers. Much to both of their surprise, Sookie was able to maintain a somewhat regular cadence in her speech. Every-so-often her voice would hitch, or she would have to pause to steel herself for the next word. All in all, though, they were both ecstatic to find that Sookie was vocalizing much easier with strangers than ever before.

As early evening came, Sookie and Eric returned to their hotel to freshen up before meeting with Rose and Eric's other friends from the past.

"Who all do you think will be there?" Sookie wondered as she hopped in the shower.

"Rose mentioned the guys. I suppose that means the band still hangs out. Whether or not they're still playing is a whole other story," Eric laughed as he stripped out of his own clothes to join his wife.

When his hands began to roam, Eric was pleased that Sookie didn't put up an effort to stop him.

"I could play with these all day," Eric whispered against his wife's ear as he fondled her breasts.

Releasing a satisfied sigh, Sookie stopped washing and let her head fall back to rest against Eric's shoulder. After a moment, however, she noted the strange pattern he kneaded her breasts.

"Eric," she began slowly, "are you doing a breast exam?"

"Uh," he fumbled as he realized he was caught.

Knowing Eric's mother had died of breast cancer, Sookie didn't question further. Instead, she reached behind her and began to cup and fondle her husband's package, "Weekly routine?" she suggested teasingly as she memorized the spheres.

Eric let a relieved chuckle tumble from his lips, "Sure." He was grateful that Sookie seemed to understand his worries and accept them.

"You're going to have to see a doctor for your prostate, though," she commented, making Eric laugh harder.

"Fair enough."

After their new shower routine, the newlyweds redressed and Eric went to the phone to give Rose a call. She picked up on the second ring, and Eric found his face splitting into a grin.

" _Eric?"_ Rose's voice was excited.

"Yeah," Eric began but was immediately cut off.

" _I got ahold of Steve, and he's got the rest of gang coming together at the pub across from the tattoo parlor. Meet you there?"_

"That sounds great," Eric told her. "By the-"

" _See you there in a few!"_ Rose hung up the phone and Eric sighed.

"I guess you will be a surprise," Eric grimaced apologetically at his wife.

Sookie smiled at his expression. "I'm actually looking forward to their expressions when they find out you're married."

"I can't even imagine," Eric frowned. "I hope they don't invite Naomi, but it's something you should be prepared for. We hung out with a lot of the same people."

Sookie frowned, "If she even thinks about bringing up her night with you, I can't begin to warn you about how I'll react."

"I understand," Eric nodded. "If she's there, I'll try to keep her away from you, but some of the guys can be tactless. One of them might bring her up."

Taking a deep breath, Sookie let it out slowly. She knew Eric wouldn't want his friends knowing the reality of that night, and allowing her anger to get the better of her was something she had a firm hold over.

"I'll do my best to remember my manners," Sookie told him.

Eric let out a relieved sigh. Even though he understood his wife's anger about Naomi, he didn't want his friends to know the truth. Whatever the truth might be. In a way, Eric was more worried that Sookie would find out what happened to him that night, and the young man wasn't sure if he wanted to know.

"So," Sookie wondered aloud, "how soon after Naomi did you go wild?"

Eric groaned, "As soon as I got a clean bill of health. Most of my, uh…"

"Conquests?" Sookie offered as she hunted down a pair of shoes.

"Sure," Eric agreed. "Most of that happened while we were living in England. Someone might bring that up, too. Jimmy likes to rile people up. He thinks it's funny."

"Where were you living when you had sex with Freyda?" Sookie wondered.

"Oklahoma," Eric replied as he found his socks.

"Oh," Sookie frowned. "I expected it to be, like, China or somewhere far away."

"There are Air Force bases in the states too," Eric teased.

"I know that," Sookie frowned.

"A majority of the time, we lived in the states. We spent some time in Germany, England, and Italy," Eric told her. "We were only in Asia once."

Sookie nodded as she grabbed her purse, but she was beginning to wonder if Eric would find their marriage boring. With her inability to fly, it would make traveling all the more difficult.

 _Maybe I just need to try some shorter plane rides to start off,_ Sookie wanted to reassure herself as they left the hotel room.

"Do I look alright?" Sookie asked as they made it to the lobby. She knew if she asked in the hotel room, she'd feel compelled to change at the slightest criticism.

"You're gorgeous," Eric assured without hesitation. "I wish we were already back in for the night."

When he gave her a salacious wink, Sookie couldn't help but giggle and squeeze his hand happily. She was going to do her best to make a great first impression on Eric's old friends!

The cab ride, unfortunately, was uneventful, and Sookie could feel her nerves working up as they rode along. If it weren't for Eric occasionally kissing the back of her hand reassuringly, Sookie wasn't sure if she would have made it to the bar.

"Have you ever drank before?" Eric wondered suddenly.

"No," Sookie admitted.

"This should be interesting," Eric laughed. "I won't be drinking, so feel free to let loose."

Sookie frowned as she considered the possibilities. What would it feel like to get drunk? Eric would make sure she didn't do anything dangerous, and the idea of such freedom was liberating.

When they arrived at the pub, Sookie could see the neon of a tattoo parlor across the street, and a flash of pink hair jogging out the door.

"That's Rose," Eric gestured and slapped a new grin on his face. "Rose!" he called. "You work there now?"

"Yeah," The pink hair bobbed as she picked up her pace to hug Eric. "Who's this? You managed to scrounge up a date in a few hours?"

"Actually," Eric beamed, "I didn't have to scrounge up a thing. This is my permanent date from now til forever. This is my wife!"

Rose's jaw slung open before she howled with laughter, "Your _wife_?! Go on, pull the other one!"

"Not pulling your leg," Eric chuckled as he held up his hand and showed his friend the wedding band on his finger.

"Holy shit, Mate! When did this happen?" Rose demanded

"Just the other day," Eric told her. "We married on the seventh."

"Hi-i," Sookie waved nervously. "I'm Sookie."

"Oh my, God," Rose gawked. "She has a movie accent!" Eric snorted at his friend's astonishment.

"Yeah, you too," Sookie replied with a tight smile.

Rose smirked, "I'm liking her."

"I'm glad you approve," Eric replied dryly.

Rose answered by flipping him the bird, and Eric just shook his head with a smile as the three finally entered the pub.

As the trio came through the doors, a loud roar came from all around, and Sookie found herself taking a step back. Soon, Eric was torn from her side and pushed around the bar like a good luck charm. Men were clapping him on the shoulders, women were kissing his cheeks, and Sookie could only watch as she found herself utterly alone.

"Don't worry, they'll settle down in a minute and then I'll shoulder you back to him," Rose smiled at the smaller blonde. "What can I get you to drink?"

"I don't know," Sookie mumbled.

"How about I pick you something?" Rose offered as she tugged the girl toward the bar. "Two long islands ice teas," she told the bartender. "They're delicious."

"Okay," Sookie replied meekly. She loved iced tea and drinking right out of the gate seemed worrisome.

"You're the shy type, huh?" Rose realized.

Sookie slowly nodded. It was probably the easiest way to explain away her quiet manners without bringing up her past.

"Your lot is the most fun to get pissed with," Rose grinned. "You never know what a shy one will do when they get a few in 'em."

Sookie accepted the drink she was offered. It really _was_ good. There was a sharpness to the beverage that wasn't quite so enjoyable, but it was melted away by the blend of other flavors.

"Whoa, whoa," Rose laughed. "Slow down!"

Before Sookie realized it, two-thirds of her glass was gone. "It's good."

Rose waved for the bartender to give her another and Sookie downed the remainder of her glass.

"Slower with this one, okay?" Rose told her as she grabbed a mixing straw and put it in the glass. "Drink with that, it'll slow you down," she laughed, taking Sookie by her free hand and pulling her through the throng of people.

"I didn't realize Eric had so many friends," Sookie admitted as she was elbowed several times in the tight confines of the pub. Her body was already starting to feel warm all over from the extra heat coming off the patrons.

"Everyone likes being around Eric," Rose laughed as they grew closer to the tall blond. "ERIC! I brought your woman back to you!" She gave Sookie a shove, and the bride stumbled into her husband's chest, but she managed not to spill her drink.

"Guys, guys!" Eric shouted to his friends. "I want you all to meet my wife. This is Sookie," He placed his arm over Sookie's shoulder, pulling her tightly to his side.

"I can't believe it," A young man with reddish-brown hair snorted. "Eric Northman is a one-woman show now!"

Sookie took a deep swig of her iced tea and gave a tight, nervous smile. Her belly felt warm with nerves, but she felt remarkably steady despite her concerns.

Eric introduced Sookie to the men around them, and she realized that everyone in the pub wasn't here for the party. Only about seven of the packed establishment had come to welcome Eric back to England.

The man with the auburn hair ended up being Jimmy, and Sookie made a note to take his comments with a grain of salt. As people asked her questions or commented, Sookie took another swig of her drink and responded with nods and shakes of her head.

Not long after being thrust into the middle of the crowd, Sookie looked at her husband, "Is your fahce numb? Mah fahce feels numb." She patted the space between her nose and cheekbone experimentally, and Eric raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"What have you been drinking?" Eric asked as he reached for her glass.

"Ahced tae," Sookie replied.

Eric took a sip of what was left of her drink and laughed, "This is a long island, Sookie. How many have you had?"

Sookie frowned, "Three?" She vaguely remembered Rose handing her another one.

"Miles, get a glass of water for Sookie. She's overdone it," Eric called to his friend.

"Ah'm fihne," Sookie assured him.

The thickening of his wife's accent said differently, and Eric could only smile at the adorable way her face had glazed over. "Do you want to make an attempt to walk?" Now that he was focused on her, he could see the distinct sway as Sookie attempted to remain upright.

They hadn't even been in the bar for much more than an hour, and Sookie had unwittingly downed three long islands. Eric had the feeling he was in for a long night.

As if the world were fighting against him at that moment, a late arrival had appeared at the gathering, and of course, it had to be the last person on earth he wanted to see.

"Hey, there, Eric," Naomi played with her iron flat black hair. She had thick rings of eyeliner circling her eyes and tugged her plump lower lip between her teeth to leave a crimson lipstick stain.

"Hi," Eric replied distractedly.

Miles returned with a glass of water at that moment and handed it to Eric before wrapping Naomi in his arms. "Hey, Naomi! I didn't know if you'd make it!"

Sookie's focus returned to the name she heard, and she ignored the water her husband was trying to get her to drink.

"Naomi?" Sookie stood straighter and looked at the woman who responded to her name.

"Yeah, that's right. Who are you?" Naomi asked.

"Ah'm Sookie," the blonde replied. "Ah'm Eric's wife."

Naomi looked taken aback, "His wife?"

"Yeah," Sookie smiled sweetly, but her eyes were colder than ice. As delicately as she could, Sookie held up her left hand and showed off her wedding band. "He's told meh a lot 'bout you. Probly more'n anyone else here could know. 'Course no one knows more'n you."

Naomi's jaw tightened.

"So," Sookie leaned in closer, "cahn ya tell meh anythin' I dohn't know?"

Eric stood frozen behind his wife, unsure what he should do. Drunk as she was, Sookie was still managing to allude without being obvious. It reminded him of her gran, how Adele could say so much without other parties catching on to the real conversation.

As the husband remained paralyzed by the possibility of his darkest secret coming to light, he reacted too slow to stop Naomi's hand as it lashed out to strike his wife's cheek. Sookie seemed unfazed by the slap.

Sookie's reply was to ball up her first, slug Naomi in the face and send her to her ass on the floor. "Takes a hella lot more'n that to put me down," Sookie told the woman. "If ya get up, you better be gettin' out."

Naomi scooted back on the floor, putting space between herself and Sookie. "He might have married you, but he'll always remember the girl he lost his virginity to."

Sookie looked down at the floor with a sour look on her face. "'Lost' would've been the right word," Sookie agreed, "if he hadn't given it to a girl named Freyda a month before he ever moved to England." Crouching down slightly, Sookie assured the girl, "Now, unless you wanna wear them raccoon eyes twenty-four-seven for the next couple weeks, I'd shut mah trap'n get outta here."

Without another comeback to retaliate with, Naomi scuttled out of the bar with her tail between her legs. Sookie finally took the water her husband had been holding and chugged it down. The anger that had been boiling inside her and the jolt of adrenaline from the confrontation had burned off some of the excess alcohol, but Sookie still felt foggy and disjointed.

Placing her head down on the bar top, Sookie promised herself she was only going to shut her eyes to make the world stop tilting.

Eric laid his hand between Sookie's shoulder blades as if to tell everyone in the room not to touch her.

"I should probably get her back to the hotel," Eric smiled awkwardly at his old friends.

"Yeah," Rose agreed uncomfortably. She wasn't Naomi's biggest fan by a stretch, but Rose was considering her decision about getting Eric's wife, so drunk had been a bad one. Rose wondered if he knew what a hair trigger his wife had when she had a few drinks in her.

"C'mon, Mate, just leave her there," Jimmy pleaded. "She'll be fine!"

"I don't know, she might pop back up swinging," Miles joked. "Does she always have such a temper?"

Eric frowned as he lazily ran his fingers over Sookie's spine. "No, she actually has a very long fuse."

"Just not with other girls who have shagged her husband in the past?" Jimmy teased.

"I'm surprised you'd go for a jealous type," Miles added.

The young husband was still looking at his wife contemplatively. He'd probably never see this group again after today, and part of him felt no sorrow in that realization. They were different people now and he wasn't the man they had known. Eric realized that he no longer cared about their opinion of him.

"I never _shagged_ Naomi," Eric told them as he scooped his wife into his arms. "I was passed out upstairs. I don't know what happened."

With that, Eric walked calmly out of the pub and onto the street. A boulder that had rested on his chest had seemed to finally roll away and let him take his first full breath. He had no more secrets or burdens to carry.

Standing on the curb, Eric waited for a taxi and was only moderately surprised when Rose followed him outside.

"What do you mean you don't know what happened?" Rose demanded as she confronted her old friend.

"Exactly that," Eric told her, staring forward and not at the pink head glaring up demandingly at him. "I was passed out. Either Naomi's full of shit and made the whole thing up, or she fucked me while I was asleep. All I know is my pants weren't open when I went into that room, but they were when I woke up."

Rose shook her head in disbelief, "Then why didn't you say something!?" She couldn't believe one of her friends could do something like Eric was saying. Even if it was Naomi. Even if they weren't the best of friends, it was still unimaginable.

"Sookie was the first person I ever told," Eric admitted. "She got me to talk to my family about it. The only reason I finally let all of you know was so you could understand my wife's anger. She's not jealous, and she doesn't have a temper. She was angry for me. She was upset with Naomi showing up like she'd done nothing wrong. Sookie was fighting _for_ me because I was too weak to talk about it."

A few cars finally passed by, and Eric waved his hand to get the attention of an incoming taxi.

"I think running into you was my chance to finally say the truth, not my chance to renew an old friendship," Eric continued as the cab pulled up to him and he opened the door. "Thanks for the memories, Rose. The good and the bad; they all brought me to Sookie."

 **TBC**

 **AN: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty-Eight: New Lesson Plans**

As Sookie's eyes opened, she could only stare straight ahead and hold her breath. Memories of her actions the previous night came back in all their technicolor glory, and she feared what would happen when she turned over in bed. She knew Eric was there from the tilt in the mattress trying to force her into his side. _How angry is he?_ She wondered as she swallowed hard around the lump in her throat. She couldn't remember a single time he had been mad at her and had no idea what to expect.

 _I've only seen him mad at others, and_ that _was scary enough!_

"I-I'm so-orry," Sookie squeaked.

"S'okay," was Eric's half-conscious reply. "At least it was in the sink."

"What?" Sookie was confused.

"I already rinsed it off," Eric yawned and pulled Sookie against his body.

"What are you talking about?" Sookie asked and turned in her husband's arms to watch his eyes open and squint in the light penetrating the draperies.

Eric smiled at his wife. "After how much you drank and then guzzling that water, of course, you threw up."

Sookie grimaced as that memory came back. She'd gagged herself brushing her teeth before bed, and immediately projectile vomited all over their bathroom. Now she felt even sorrier.

"I was talking about the scene I caused last night," Sookie mumbled. "I don't remember coming back from the bar. What happened?"

"After you slugged Naomi?" Eric asked with a smirk. "You fell asleep at the bar. I told everyone why you hit her and then I hailed a taxi to take us back to the hotel."

"You _told_ them?" Sookie asked with a strange combination of dismay and admiration.

"I did," Eric smiled reassuringly. "And you gave me the courage to do it."

"I did?" Sookie asked in wonderment.

"When I thought of everyone believing you to be some short-tempered bitch, I had to set them straight," Eric grinned at her. "It felt good to get it out."

"Do you wish you knew what all happened?" Sookie asked.

"It doesn't matter," Eric assured her. "All the repercussions are gone. I didn't contract anything, Naomi didn't get pregnant, and all my relationships have been fixed. I owe that last one entirely to you. It's a thing that may or may not have happened, and it doesn't hurt me anymore… Well, I still don't think I'll ever enjoy drinking, but I was a control freak before Naomi."

Sookie snorted, "You're hardly a control freak."

"You only say that because I rarely freak out on you," Eric chuckled as he pulled Sookie closer to his chest.

"I think," Sookie gave his lips a gentle kiss, "you value and trust my opinion more than most. Maybe that's why you don't freak out with me?"

Rolling above her, Eric returned her kiss with more passion, "That's sound reasoning."

Sookie's legs wrapped around her husband's hips as he hovered above her. Reaching between their bodies, Sookie took his cock into her hand and gave it a firm stroke.

Eric gasped as Sookie's wedding band applied a slightly harder amount of pressure against his staff. It wasn't the sensation that made it heart pound, but the implication of the feeling's presence.

"Whoa," Sookie giggled as the member in her hand swelled quickly. "You're ready to go!"

In reply to her proclamation, Eric took Sookie's hands in his own and pushed them above her head where their fingers laced near the headboard. Sookie's breath caught as her hands were pinned against the mattress and Eric's chest was pressed tightly against her own. A quick contraction in her womb made Sookie's hips twist slightly before her husband's cock pressed against her opening.

"You drank too much," Eric laughed as his rod suddenly stopped at the gates of his own, personal paradise.

"Huh?" Sookie mumbled.

"You're turned on, but you're not as wet as usual," Eric told her as he released her hands and slid down her body. "I can help with that."

Sookie groaned as Eric's tongue began lapping between her folds. It was one more reason that Sookie was now less than fond of drinking. Sure, an opportunity to get Eric's mouth against her slit was always pleasurable, but the only excuse her husband needed to eat her out was if the day ended in the letter 'y.'

"Ah!" Sookie tangled her fingers in Eric's hair. "Stay in bed today?"

Eric's mouth steadied a moment. "No touristy shit?"

Pushing his mouth back against her sex, Sookie mumbled. "No. Just this. All day."

Eric laughed as he grabbed his wife's hips and let his tongue loose around her clit. Sookie moaned, and her legs bowed open. She gasped and groaned as his fingers worked their way inside her.

As her juices finally began to flow, Eric became captivated with her noisy enthusiasm. At least, Sookie was being loud for _her_. Anyone else might think she was near silent, but Eric had been learning her body and sounds for over a year. Despite their time being separated, Eric had still memorized more about his future wife than most could have learned of their own partners in a consecutive year.

"E-Eric," Sookie gasped as his mouth became more vigorous. She could tell he had something to prove, and her body was reacting to his need. "Umm, uh," she found herself holding her breath, taking small, hiccupping gasps of air until her body coiled just before the release.

Finally, her lungs broke into a pant, and she arched off the bed with a guttural moan. Eric's hand slipped back so that he could feel his wife's muscles flex around the tips of his fingers.

"I love feeling you squeeze me, Love," Eric mumbled as he kissed his way back up her body.

As she recovered her breath, Sookie moaned as she felt Eric pushing her hip so that she rolled onto her stomach. With a deep, steadying breath, Sookie clambered onto her knees and elbows before balancing her weight onto her right shoulder. With her hand freed, Sookie reached back between her legs to rub her momentarily satiated pussy.

Eric groaned as her left hand reached back to spread herself open, and there were her wedding bands reflecting the morning light from the diamond of her engagement ring.

Without much remaining control, Eric thrust into his wife's invitation, reveling in the grunt it tore from her lips. Her fingers remained busy, rubbing her swollen clit and occasionally grazing his balls with her nails. Eric's hand came down upon her right cheek with the force of a firm high-five, and Sookie's channel tightened in surprise which was followed by a moan.

Repeating the gentle spanking, Eric found that he was greatly enjoying the way her body reacted to it. The way her legs jumped and walls clenched was part of the reason. Mostly, though, Eric found that Sookie would lean into the contact and briefly increase the force of their coupling.

As Sookie sucked in a short breath and held it, Eric grinned to himself as he felt her walls tightening on their own. Grabbing her hips, Eric managed to create quick, shallow thrusts that drove his wife over the edge before burying himself deeply and filling her with his own passion.

Remaining frozen and still deep inside of Sookie, Eric held his wife tightly as he continued pulsing. Finally, with the last twitch of his hips, Eric felt his orgasm end.

"Are you _done_?" Sookie teased with a groggy laugh. "You're gonna make me slosh when I walk."

Eric snorted at her joke and pulled away, at last, marveling at the fluid that dribbled out of his lover as he did so.

"Hmm," Eric tempered his growing arousal. They still hadn't eaten anything since early yesterday evening, and he knew Sookie was probably famished.

Falling onto his side upon the bed, Eric's arms around Sookie's waist brought her along for the tumble.

"Room Service?" he asked.

"Room Service," she agreed.

{†}

Sookie carefully followed behind Eric on the narrow staircase up to their flat. Although they had been staying in Sussex for a few days now, the steep climb to their third-floor apartment was still tedious as other tenants came flying down the steps like they were being chased by the devil.

"Alright, Love?" Sookie still swooned when he called her that, and when Eric admitted he didn't realize he was doing it, she assured him the pet name was more than acceptable to her. Apparently being in England again had brought the mannerism back, and Sookie was content with it as long as he didn't use the endearment on anyone else!

Eric sighed as they finally arrived in their own lodging, "We have train and bus schedules, we found a church for the next two months, we've found the local shopping, _and_ we officially have all our missing necessities." He carefully placed the heavy bags on the small kitchen counter. Their temporary housing had included essential kitchen appliances, but no pots, pans, dishes, cooking utensils or flatware.

"Classes start tomorrow," Eric reminded his wife, "are you sure you won't be lonely here by yourself all day?"

It was true that Sookie had grown accustomed to the constant company of Pam and Tara over the past year, but she was confident it would be easy to fall into her old habits of solitude.

Her biggest goal during this part of their stay in England was to show Eric that she could have a social life while being a housewife. She knew Eric's biggest concern was that she would never have friends of her own if she didn't attend school or get a job.

"I'll be fine," Sookie assured him. "By the time you get home from class tomorrow, you'll see!"

Eric smiled at Sookie's enthusiasm. This semester abroad, although a trying journey, was a perfect trial run before they returned home. They would be able to find a routine and with any luck, discover a balance in how they worked together as a married couple.

For the three days they had spent in their apartment, Sookie and Eric had mostly eaten takeaway or bought prepared food that they ate out of the containers from the nearby grocery store. Now, with their kitchen stocked with food and cookware, Sookie was ready to show off her culinary expertise.

As Eric went over his schedule at the kitchen table, Sookie began preparing a nice big lunch for the two of them. They ate together, talking about their plans for the following day, and Sookie was pleasantly surprised when her husband helped her clear their dishes and wash them.

"You're going to spoil me if you make a habit of this," Sookie teased as she washed and he dried the dishes.

"It's already ingrained in me," Eric assured her. "Mom always made me clear the dishes and wash them. I figure I'll be off the hook when our first kid is tall enough to reach the sink.

Sookie laughed at his plan. "Is that why you're open to starting a family so soon?"

"Maybe," Eric teased as he dried the last plate and put it in the cabinet.

{†}

The first day of classes, Eric found himself distracted, wondering what Sookie had managed to fill her day with. When there was a break in his classes, he came home to eat lunch with Sookie and was excited to see that she'd been to the library since he'd left and made copies of new recipes to try out. They ate, they washed dishes and Eric happily made love to his wife over the kitchen sink afterward before rushing back to campus to finish his day.

Every day of the summer semester seemed to pass like that. Eric would return home from classes and study as Sookie hummed in the kitchen. They ate their evening meal together, cleaned up, and then Eric would continue studying while Sookie read a book and rested her feet on her husband's lap.

On Fridays, Eric would bring home takeout from a nearby restaurant, and the pair would find a movie to watch on the crummy little TV screen that had come with the apartment.

Saturdays involved a train ride to London and explorations of the beautiful city where they'd spend the night and then attend church before taking the train back to Sussex. It was on one of their long train rides back to Sussex that Sookie finally asked, "Why do you go to church with me?"

Eric glanced down at his wife, "What do you mean?"

"You don't believe in any of it," Sookie explained. "Why do you come?"

"Because it's important to you," Eric shrugged. "And I figure you'll want to raise our kids in the church. I wouldn't dream of sending my family off without me every Sunday."

Sookie smiled and snuggled against her husband's arm, "You seem to make a lot of concessions for me."

"An hour out of my Sunday isn't a sacrifice," Eric laughed. "As long as it's important to you, that's what matters."

"It is important to me," Sookie nodded. "Thank you." She wondered what she could possibly give to him in return. "If I went to culinary school, would that be important to you?"

Eric glanced at his wife in surprise. He thought this conversation had been closed months ago. "It would only be important to me if it was something you wanted."

A smile tugged at Sookie's lips, "I don't know that I'd ever want to work in a restaurant or anything, but the more cookbooks I read, the more recipes I try, I still feel like a home cook. It feels like there's a lot more out there for me to learn and _that_ excites me."

"There are still four weeks left of my semester," Eric pointed out. "I'm sure you could find a couple cooking classes to try out before enrolling in a culinary school."

Sookie nodded in agreement. "I wonder if they have classes start more often in cooking academies than they do for traditional universities since it's only an eighteen-month program instead of four years?"

"I don't know. It's something we could look into. Let's see how you like cooking classes before we start filling out enrollment forms for some culinary institute." Eric was smiling the remainder of the ride back to Sussex. Even if Sookie decided not to go to a formal school, she might enjoy the occasional class.

Later that week, the couple found a culinary school that did single classes, but Sookie was disappointed when she saw the available courses were things she already knew how to make. Still, she signed up for a bread baking class, wondering if it would bring her some new depth to her knowledge.

"Are you sure you'll be okay going by yourself?" Eric asked nervously as he walked with his wife to the train station. The school was in London, and Eric had his own classes to attend.

"I'll be fine, " Sookie reassured him. "I will call the apartment when I head for the train home."

"I'll meet you here, " Eric told her, and Sookie laughed at his worrying. As she boarded the train, Sookie waved goodbye to her husband and then settled in for the long train ride to London. Alone.

All in all, the trip by herself was no big deal. The young woman read most of the time and ignored the other commuters. No one bothered her, and Sookie felt relieved that she could just attend a class like anyone else.

In some respects, Sookie dreaded taking the cooking class because her experience with school was less than encouraging. Her entire academic career thus far was riddled with physical and psychological attacks. Part of her feared that she was like a wounded animal and predators could sniff her out from a mile away. This concerned her because she wasn't sure how long that stench would linger on her. However, she had decided that she would always be a victim if she didn't try to overcome what others perceived as her weakness.

As the train pulled into her stop, Sookie gathered her things and stood as the car lurched forward with the brakes. Once she was on the city streets by herself, some of her courage began to drip away.

By the time Sookie arrived at the London Culinary Academy, she was clutching her purse to her chest. Her legs felt like Jell-O as she walked up the obnoxiously tall steps in front of the building, but she continued to push forward.

When Sookie found the classroom for her course, a sense of relief washed over her. There were grandmothers _everywhere_. She was the youngest person in the entire class by several decades.

"Hello, there," a hunched woman with a cane greeted her.

"Hi," Sookie returned the acknowledgment.

"I've never seen a youngster at one of these. I'm Martha," the woman introduced herself.

"Sookie," she replied as her concerns eased.

Martha looked at the younger girl's nervously clasped hands and smiled. "Newly married?"

"Five weeks and two days," Sookie whispered.

The old woman's smile split wider into a grin. "Did you come to learn to cook for him?"

"I already know how to cook," Sookie explained. "I just want to learn more."

Martha nodded in understanding, "These are great classes for those of us that want to learn new tricks, but know how to boil an egg."

"That's what I'm hoping for," Sookie agreed. "I've never been able to reach the level of a professional it seems like."

"Is that what you want o to be? A chef?" Martha asked delightedly.

Sookie shook her head, "I don't think so. I don't know."

"Well, you have all the time in the world," Martha assured her. "It's good you're trying things and not just settling in."

"Ladies, ladies!" A young man entered the classroom, clapping his hands to get the students' attention. "Is everyone ready to begin? Choose a workstation!"

"That's Victor, or Chef Madden as he makes all the new students call him," Martha whispered as Sookie stuck to her side and chose the station next to the old woman.

"Is he strict?" Sookie wondered.

"He's an obnoxious little bugger," Martha chuckled. "Quite the ego for a kid that seems stuck teaching old biddies like me."

Sookie smiled amusedly as they began listening to Chef Madden's introduction to the class. The ingredients and methods seemed pretty straightforward, but Sookie was used to plain white bread or sourdough bread. She'd never made authentic baguettes, Italian, or Rye. Currently, they were simultaneously making all three!

As Sookie began to wonder if she'd gotten in over her head, she remembered the confections and treats she'd made non-stop last year to pay for Eric's guitar. When she reminded herself that she'd baked in bulk plenty of times, Sookie's nerves settled, and she refocused.

"Take that jewelry off before you begin kneading the dough," Chef Madden demanded. "No one wants to chip a tooth on cheap zirconia."

There was no time to feel outraged that Madden had implied her engagement ring was costume jewelry. Sookie was too distracted by the idea of removing her wedding band and engagement ring. She hadn't taken either of them off before. The thought of removing them made her nervous.

"It's alright, Dear," Martha encouraged, "we all take them off when we cook." She pointed to her own rings at the top of the table, away from harm.

Taking a deep breath, Sookie removed her rings and flexed her hand experimentally. A callous had already begun to form near her engagement ring the past year, and her thumb ran over the rough spot, mesmerized.

After the initial paranoia abated, Sookie concentrated on her work once again. She slammed the dough expertly against the table, sending small puffs of flour into the air. Slowly, she grew engrossed in the environment, chatting animatedly with Martha and making bread.

 _This is what I'd like,_ Sookie realized. If she were to bake for others, she'd want it to feel like a community. Kneading dough side by side with someone, out in the open, talking to customers as they ate the goodies she made. She didn't want to be trapped in a hot kitchen alone or with people screaming all around at each other.

 _I want to be a baker,_ Sookie discovered when she pulled out her first loaf of French bread and placed it out to cool.

"That looks better than anyone's," Martha whispered proudly as she nodded at the three loaves of bread Sookie had set out. The color, the smell, the warmth radiating from each mound called to all of them to pull them apart and enjoy.

Chef Madden sampled each loaf, telling the women what they did wrong and how to do it right the next time. When it was Sookie's turn to be judged, she was disappointed to hear that even though hers were the best in class, she still had a long way to go.

"Being best in class for your first lesson is a huge accomplishment, Sookie," Martha assured. "I'll be taking the pasta class next week. Will you be there?"

"That sounds nice," Sookie smiled as they all began packing up.

While the women headed for the door, Sookie subconsciously swiped her finger over her callous and felt her heart thump loudly like a screaming reminder.

Twirling around on her heel, Sookie dashed back to her workstation to grab her wedding bands. As she approached and realized they weren't there, Sookie felt her throat tighten, and her heart drop into her stomach.

Falling to her hands and knees, the young wife searched beneath the table and felt hot tears building in her eyes. _OH my GOD!_

"Lose something?" Chef Madden's voice called above her, and Sookie sprung up from the floor.

"Ma, m-y we-wedding ri-ing," Sookie choked around her tight throat. It was the first time she'd had difficulty speaking during their entire trip abroad.

"Well, it couldn't have gone far," Madden gestured to the classroom as he stooped down to look underneath another workstation.

"Tha-ank you," Sookie garbled as she felt her hands shaking in the frantic search for her rings. _What if someone took them while I wasn't looking? When's the last time I checked to be sure they were on the table?_

"Found them!" Madden called from beneath the station two down from Sookie. "They must have rolled down here."

 _Both of them?_ Sookie wondered. Her wedding band made enough sense since it was just a simple, smooth gold. Her engagement ring, however, had a marquise cut diamond mounted on it and couldn't roll for anything.

Chef Madden approached, holding Sookie's rings up triumphantly. "Here you go," he tried to take her hand and place the rings back where they belonged, but Sookie snatched her hand away and took the bands to put on herself.

"Thank you," Sookie whispered as she reached for her purse.

"No, thank you for attending my class," Madden smiled at her sudden switch to caution. "You really have a gift, you know? You've been baking a third of the time as the rest of the class, and you outshone every one of them."

"Thank you," Sookie repeated nervously as Madden smoothly placed himself between her and the door.

"Are you staying in London long? You should take more classes," Madden encouraged.

 _He's just trying to get more money out of you,_ Sookie told herself calmly, but something in his actions felt false. She was reminded how Bill Compton would be really nice to her right before he was utterly horrible to her. This felt a bit different, though. She felt like she was being lulled into something, but she wasn't sure what it was.

"My husband's summer semester is another three and a half weeks, and then we go home to Louisiana," Sookie explained, hoping that mentioning her husband would remind Madden about the rings he found and what they signified.

"How long have you been married?" Madden asked, and Sookie felt relief at the interest he was taking.

"Five weeks and two days," Sookie told him more boldly.

"And he's already letting you run around town without him?" Madden laughed.

"He had classes. He doesn't want me to get bored," Sookie defended.

"And are you bored?" Madden asked, and Sookie took a step back. The insincere aura had returned in full volume.

"No," Sookie assured. "I'm more than happy."

"That's why you came all the way to London from Sussex to take a _cooking_ class that you don't need? Because you're so _not_ bored?" Madden laughed again, but it was much more condescending. "There are classes in Sussex. Much closer courses you could take to fill your time."

"Maybe I'll take one of those next time," Sookie tried to put a group of tables between herself and Madden.

"Are you sure you came out to London to fill time and not something else?" Madden leered at her, and Sookie realized exactly what was happening. Madden wasn't trying to _hurt_ her. He was trying to _seduce_ her.

"I'm plenty fulfilled. Thank you. I'm leaving now," Sookie hoped that would end the discussion, and she felt relieved when Madden didn't try to approach her again. He seemed put off as she practically ran out of the classroom, and Sookie dashed all the way through the front doors of the academy.

As the young woman jogged toward the train station, she barely remembered to stop in a phone booth to call Eric at the apartment. She knew by her short, brusque call that he would be waiting, suspiciously, at the Sussex station.

The entire trip back home, Sookie tried to think of the least alarming way to tell Eric why she had no intention of going back to the academy. She figured the best way to start the conversation would be with the surprise that she planned on enrolling in culinary school and wanting to open her own bakery once their children were old enough to start school. That would give them plenty of time to find a location for the bakery and decide how to juggle a business and family.

For the first time, the trip from London to Sussex didn't seem like an eternity. Instead, it passed by in the blink of an eye, and soon Sookie was departing the train and falling under the concerned gaze of her husband on the platform.

"What happened?" Eric demanded.

"I, uh," Sookie fumbled, unprepared for his anxiety despite having anticipated it. She was used to being the nervous one. "I want to enroll in culinary school."

Eric froze in his distress momentarily as he was overcome with surprise. "Really?"

"Yes," Sookie nodded. "I want to open a pastry shop with an open kitchen, and get to watch people light up when they eat the cookies and cupcakes and all the other sweets."

"I wasn't expecting this," Eric shook his head, still absorbing that he might have overreacted at her quick call. Still, he knew Sookie, and her tone over the phone hadn't been one of excited distraction. She'd been agitated and distressed. "What else happened?"

Sookie took a deep breath, "The instructor was untoward after class. I think he believed I was a bored housewife looking for… uh… Extramarital activities."

Eric's lip curled. "I'll-"

"Do nothing," Sookie stopped him. "I told him I wasn't interested, and he let me leave without any problems. It was a misunderstanding, and I don't plan on taking any more classes there. I'll wait until we're back home and see if I can't get some enrollment applications to fill out for school while we're here. For now, I'm happy as is."

Letting out a long sigh, Eric couldn't help but accept Sookie's decision. Although he was angry at this mystery teacher, it wouldn't do any good to cause a scene. Sookie didn't appear shook up, nor did she seem altered in any other way. He reminded himself that Sookie had her own strengths, and took comfort in that.


	29. Chapter 29

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Well, we're on the final chapters! Only two more and an epilogue left! Fortunately, I already have the next story brewing in my brain. Hopefully, it won't be too long of a wait for the next adventure. Our next story will be returning us to the land of vampires, telepaths, and all that other supernatural goodness that you guys know I like to play around with!_

 _Enjoy, guys!_

 _-Andi_

 **Chapter Twenty-Nine: Officially a Brigant**

 **December 1998**

Eric Northman had been told many times that he didn't deserve his wife even before they had been married. Once the newlyweds had returned from England, though, Eric began to hear the accusation less and less.

At first, Eric was concerned that returning to Louisiana would hinder Sookie's strides in recovering and maintaining her voice. Instead, it appeared that the return to familiarity, but continued avoidance of Bon Temps had spurred her into even more impressive progression. She quickly made her first appointment with Dr. Octavia Fant upon their return to the States and proceeded to impress her husband with all her other efforts.

Sookie did volunteer work at the local library, reading to children on Wednesdays, attended church every Sunday, and been accepted to the local culinary school. Thanks to Fintan, Sookie had several enrollment applications mailed to her while she and Eric spent their time abroad.

After her enrollment, Sookie continued to keep their home neat and brought food home from school to test on her husband.

It was only Sookie's second month in school, but Eric watched as his wife became more self-assured. He admired her at the parties they were invited to, and couldn't fathom how this was the same girl he had met two years ago. What he _could_ understand was how he still loved her so much.

That was why Eric did everything he could to make sure she knew he appreciated all her efforts. He cleaned the dishes every night, volunteered what time he could to church events alongside Sookie, and brought her a single flower home after classes every day. When her eyes would light up at the new flash of color and wafting aroma, Eric would feel his heart speed up.

The truth was, by bettering herself, Sookie made her husband be the best that he could be. He knew she often felt that people saw them as a mismatched couple, but he knew she thought he had married down instead of the other way around.

Whatever toxicity in Bon Temps that had tried to poison Sookie had no power in New Orleans. She was free, confident and strong away from her childhood home.

"Good afternoon, Love, " Eric greeted Sookie as she exited her school building. "How was class today?" His arms opened to wrap around his wife's shoulder.

Sookie pouted as she held up her hand, "I got another burn."

Taking her hand in his, Eric planted a healing kiss on her bandage. "You will get used to the industrial size equipment soon, and then you won't get so many burns."

Opening the passenger door of their car for her, Eric jogged around to his side before continuing the conversation. "Did you eat a lot in class?"

"No, Chef Chow says I have a terrific pallet and is impressed by how little I have to sample to experience all the flavors."

"Does he now?" Eric kissed his wife's hand playfully. Eric had met all of Sookie's instructors already while picking his wife up at school. It had been a happy side effect of their commuting arrangement but had simultaneously put Eric's heart at ease. The last thing he wanted was for Sookie to put up with unwanted attention. He knew if a teacher tried to abuse their position and proposition her, Sookie would refuse and continue with her classes. She had a high tolerance for bullshit.

"Are you jealous?" Sookie teased as she took her handy nail clippers from her pocket and began picking debris from beneath her nails with the file.

"Of Chow?" Eric laughed at the idea. True, the chef was young, tattooed and definitely had an appeal for the right woman, but Eric didn't feel threatened. "Only if you said you had a thing for Asians. If it were the tattoos I'd walk right into that parlor there," he gestured up the street, "and get 'Property of Sookie Northman,' tattooed all over my body."

Sookie laughed, "Are you trying to make _me_ sound like the possessive one in our marriage?"

"Possessive?" Eric feigned being wounded. "Is worrying about my wife's health, happiness, and attraction to her husband being possessive?"

"When you give your wife monthly breast exams? It's a little creepy," Sookie teased.

"You check my balls," Eric pointed out.

"Only because I'm already down there," Sookie stuck her tongue out playfully.

"And I'm usually holding these," Eric reached over with one hand and squeezed his wife's breast. "Two birds. One stone."

Sookie laughed harder as she placed her hand over his and held it there for a moment. Finally, she glanced behind her and frowned. "Are we going straight to the airport?"

"Unless you want to eat first?" Eric glanced at Sookie curiously.

"I can make it back to Bon Temps and eat at Rosenfont," Sookie assured.

"Not your Gran's?" Eric was surprised. Sookie shook her head. "I thought everything was okay between you two?" Eric's voice became sympathetic.

"It is," Sookie frowned.

"Then what's the problem?" Eric asked as they grew closer to the airport.

"I still don't want to go back into the house," Sookie admitted. Ever since she'd returned from England, being inside the old farmhouse had felt wrong. She wished she could blame it on the recovery of her memories involving Bartlett, but Sookie knew better, and so did Eric.

"I suppose it's still glaringly obvious that Bon Temps is your kryptonite and the farmhouse isn't your safe haven anymore," Eric considered.

"I wish Gran and Fintan would just get married. Maybe she'd move in with him, and I'd never have to go back?" Sookie wondered.

Eric smiled at his wife's wish, "You're actually starting to like Fintan quite a bit, aren't you?"

Sookie smiled, "It was really sweet of him to write while we were in England, and to get all those applications together for me so I could enroll in time for the semester."

"That was pretty amazing of him," Eric agreed. He had a feeling Fintan had also made generous donations to all the New Orleans cooking academies so that they would accept her late application. He never brought this up, however, because he didn't want Sookie to think she'd only been taken thanks to her grandfather's money.

When they finally arrived at the airport, Sookie was happy to see Alcide and Claudine in the same security line as them. When they were nearing the waiting area for boarding, Sookie approached the couple and smiled.

"Hey, guys," Sookie waved at the pair happily, belying the earlier conversation.

"Hey, Sookie," Alcide grinned down at the short blond. As Eric approached, Sookie was soon encircled by tall, striking figures.

"I hate when you guys all stand around me," Sookie groaned. "I feel like a valley among mountains."

Claudine snorted as she stooped down to hug her cousin. "How's school going?"

"Really well, thank you. How was your first semester with no math classes?" Sookie teased.

"Divine," Claudine sighed happily. "Guess what I heard from my brother?"

"Claude?" Sookie frowned. "What did he have to say?"

"Well," Claudine's grin widened, "it seems my dad went ring shopping with your grandpa."

"Not my grandpa," Sookie sighed. She hated that everyone was trying to give that title to him. She _liked_ Fintan, but Earl Stackhouse had been Sookie's grandpa. "Wait. Ring shopping?"

"I think he's going to pop the question for Christmas!" Claudine clapped excitedly.

"Whoa," Sookie blinked, having been impatient for the occasion. After all, she and Eric hadn't dated much longer than them, and they hadn't already conceived two children together!

"Aren't you happy?" Claudine frowned.

"Yes!" Sookie replied quickly. "Just surprised."

"Well, you shouldn't be. They're old. They deserve every minute together they can get," Claudine said pointedly.

"Yes, they do," Sookie agreed. "I was just surprised because I was telling Eric on the drive here how I wished he would hurry up and propose already!"

As the women talked about their family finally joining through marriage, Alcide was off to the side talking to Eric about something that had been bothering him for months.

"I take it you finally talked to Quinn about the Frat party attendees?" Eric laughed at the look on Alcide's face.

"Yeah," the brunette laughed. "I know it sounds stupid."

"No it doesn't," Eric assured. After Alcide had attended one of Quinn's parties and seen his ex there with her new 'friends,' Eric knew it was only a matter of time before the man snapped and went digging. "What did Quinn have to say?"

"He only knew one of the guys from the three of them that were there with her. His name is Malcolm, and I guess he graduated from UNO a couple years ago. He's actually from Quinn's fraternity."

"That makes sense why he and his friends could just show up, but no one knew the other three," Eric nodded.

"Yeah," Alcide agreed. "Every party Malcolm went to, he was there with that bald, tattooed guy, a black girl with an afro, but the second girl always changed. Now Debbie looks to be the permanent second girl. He talked to a few people and told me that they're a bunch of swingers and that quite a few STDs had been flying around since they started showing up at parties. Quinn says he hasn't seen them at a party since the one I saw them at."

"Do you know where Debbie went over the summer?" Eric asked in surprise.

Alcide rubbed his head in embarrassment, "I talked to her ma when I was up for Thanksgiving. We were together a long time. I guess I wanted to make sure she was okay."

"Alcide?"

"She ran off to Jackson, Mississippi," Alcide frowned. "Last her ma heard, Debbie was shacked up with some friends sharing an apartment. I guess that means I've seen her more recently than Mrs. Pelt. She's worried about her."

Eric crossed his arms over his chest, "And so are you?"

"Yeah," Alcide confessed. "How stupid am I? Look at the woman I'm dating!" He loosely gestured toward Claudine. "She's smart, funny, gorgeous-"

"STD free," Eric added.

"Yeah," Alcide hung his head. "I don't know what I'm doing."

"You're homesick," Eric offered. "Debbie was your home for a long time. It's okay to be nostalgic, but the things we missed are rarely as good as we remember. Every time you think of her, start chanting syphilis. It will stop hurting soon."

"It's been over half a year," Alcide groaned.

"And you were together since you were kids," Eric reminded. "Stop beating yourself up over it, but don't ruin your current relationship over it either."

"You're right, you're right," Alcide grumbled.

Before the conversation could continue, the four friends were called to board, and any further discussion about Debbie was halted.

The flight to Shreveport was brief, and Eric was happy to see Sookie handling the journey comfortably. Thankfully her lousy experience flying to England had just been the stress of the day and length of the trip. The return flight had been far less eventful, although she had definitely gripped his hand anxiously through take-off, turbulence, and landing. Now she handled short plane rides like a seasoned pro.

When they arrived in Shreveport, family was there to greet them. As it turned out, Claude was instructed to bring the couples to a Shreveport hotel, and Sookie was excitedly preparing herself for a proposal.

As they arrived in a conference room off the lobby of Shreveport's most elegant hotel, Sookie became far more excited. The room was decorated with flowers, and Fintan was waiting there nervously.

"Good evening, everyone," Fintan greeted warmly, and Sookie could see that his hands were shaking. A brief tug called to her heart, and she found herself taking Fintan's hand. Hadley was standing off to the side talking to her mother and Sophie-Anne. André was speaking with a woman Sookie had never seen before.

Fintan squeezed Sookie's hand, accepting her comfort, "I suppose you can all guess why I wanted you to meet me here?"

"You're gonna propose to Gran," Sookie whispered with a giant grin.

"That's right. With your blessing of course?" Fintan added hurriedly.

Sookie gave him an energetic nod. "Of course you have it!"

"Thank you," Fintan sighed with relief. "Your brother already told me she was all mine as long as you said it was okay." Fintan laughed nervously, "Now all I have to do is see if she says yes."

Sookie knew her gran would say yes, and judging by the scenery and guests; the granddaughter wouldn't be surprised if the wedding would quickly follow. Fidgeting slightly, Sookie couldn't help but wish she had dressed up.

Soon her grandmother arrived with Jason and froze in surprise as she came through the doorway. "What is all of this?" Adele wondered. She was wearing her Sunday best, and Jason had at least bothered to wear a shirt with a collar. Sookie was really regretting her black slacks and white undershirt, but it's what everyone wore to class! At least she had taken off her chef's coat and left it in the car!

"This," Fintan smiled as he approached Adele, "is an old man _finally_ asking the love of his life something he should have asked fifty years ago."

Adele gasped as Fintan grabbed a chair and used it to help himself take a knee slowly to the ground. "Adele," Fintan reached in his pocket. "I've waited longer than any man should have to wait but would do so a hundred times for the chance. Will you marry an old idiot?"

"Yes!" Adele cried happily as she held out her hand in acceptance.

"I don't want us to waste another minute," Fintan told her as he slipped the impressive stone onto her finger. "So, if our families would kindly help me _back_ to my feet. What do you say we get married right now?"

Claude and Jason quickly jumped to action, and each placed a hand under either of Fintan's arms to raise him from the floor.

" _That's_ why you wouldn't let me out of the house without putting on a dress?" Adele asked of her grandson.

"You got it," Jason grinned. "And for once, I look more put together than Sookie!"

Sookie groaned as she imagined her appearance. However, there was little time to fret over the situation. The strange woman who had been talking to André when they'd arrived had turned out to be the Justice of the Peace, as Sookie had predicted. The ceremony was short, the marriage certificate was signed, and soon everyone was eating cake and congratulating the newlyweds.

"I'd wanted to ask her sooner," Fintan began, "but I didn't want to steal your thunder, Sookie."

The young woman was grateful, not because she would have minded sharing her wedding anniversary with her Gran, but since back in June, Sookie was still getting used to Fintan being around. Now, the old man seemed to fit among her family just as well as any of them. Seeing how he interacted with her and Jason only made more family traits glaringly obvious. Sookie had always wondered where Jason and her daddy had gotten their smartass smirks. Now she knew they came from Fintan and his side of the family.

"How is school going, Sookie?" Fintan asked kindly as he and Adele stood side by side. Sookie melted a bit at how her gran's head rested against Fintan's shoulder.

"Really well!" Sookie assured them. "I can't thank you enough for getting me those applications so I could enroll for the fall semester!"

"It was nothing," Fintan waved off the thanks. "I was happy to hear you were interested in continuing your education. You like your instructors?"

"They're all wonderful," Sookie told him. "I've been learning a ton already, and Eric's told me he can't believe my cooking could get even better than it already was. It's a good thing I'm learning to balance dishes, though or we'd both be getting fat!"

Adele and Fintan both chuckled, but Sookie could see they were glowing too much to really care what she had to say. She couldn't blame them though, she'd felt very much the same on her wedding day.

An hour later, the party was wrapping up, and everyone went their separate ways as Fintan and Adele headed up to their suite. Fintan had told Eric before they left that he was taking his wife to Jamaica for their honeymoon later that week. Eric had to applaud Fintan on his having a shorter flight than Eric's own honeymoon. The young man was still kicking himself for putting Sookie through that.

Catching a ride to Rosenfont Hall with Jason, Eric and Sookie were relieved to arrive at the house and ready to go to sleep as soon as they slouched into Eric's old bedroom.

Climbing the stairs, Eric saw his sister's light still on and went to tell her goodnight. "Meet you in bed," Eric kissed Sookie's cheek as he handed her the duffle bag and went further down the hall. "Pam, you awa-" Eric pushed his sister's door open and immediately slapped his hand over his eyes. "Sorry, stupid move. Sorry," Eric repeated as he turned out of the doorway and back down the hall.

As comfortable as Eric was with his sister's sexual orientation, he had never prepared himself for… That.

More than anything, Eric had not expected his sister to enter a romantic relationship with Tara Thornton! Pam had never given the slightest indication that she had feelings for Tara, but after seeing the pair… _Uh, entangled?_ Eric mentally censored himself. It was apparent he had been wrong.

"Sookie," Eric whispered as he arrived in his old room, "did you know that Pam and Tara-"

"Are dating?" Sookie finished.

"More like fucking," Eric grumbled.

Sookie's eyes widened as she stared at her husband, "Did you just walk in on your sister having sex?"

"Yes, and it was _horrible_ ," Eric moaned.

His wife snorted on a laugh, "They've been dating since August."

"Are you serious? Why didn't I know this?" Eric demanded sullenly. He was happy for his sister but disappointed that she hadn't told him.

Sookie shrugged, "It's her first relationship, and Tara's not out yet because she doesn't want the town to know she's a lesbian. She saw how everyone treated her cousin, and she doesn't want the same to happen to her."

Eric felt a pang for the couple, "That sucks."

"It does," Sookie agreed. "How did Pam react when she saw you?"

"I have no idea," Eric confessed. "I slapped my hand over my eyes and ran away."

Sookie used all her willpower not to full out laugh at her husband.

"It's not funny," He could see the restraint on his wife's face.

"You're right. It's hilarious," Sookie erupted into a fit of giggles.

Eric let out a sigh and shook his head, "I'm happy for her. I wish them the best. I just wish I didn't have to see what I saw."

Sookie smiled, "They've been talking about getting a place together when Pam goes off to college."

"Tara's not planning on going to college?" Eric frowned, feeling a bit disapproving, but quickly stamping it out. He'd never disapproved of Sookie's former reluctance to continue her education. Although, he _had_ been concerned by it at first.

"She doesn't know what she wants to do yet, and Tara isn't really… Academically motivated," Sookie tried to phrase delicately. "Pam mentioned that Tara was considering going to a community college to at least work on pre-requisites, though."

"Not academically motivated?" Eric raised his eyebrows.

Sookie shrugged, "She doesn't see the point in paying someone to tell her to read books when she can just bypass the teacher and buy the books herself."

Eric snorted, "Unfortunately, reading the books doesn't get you the degree."

"That's what Pam told her, which is what got Tara to agree to go to a community college," Sookie nodded. "I think Pam is good for Tara. She's the only person I know stubborn enough to call Tara out for her crap."

Eric smiled, "And is Tara good for Pam?"

Sookie's smile softened, "Tara's got a lot to overcome, but I think with the right person, she will _definitely_ become someone Pam will want by her side. Tara's instinctively more cautious than anyone else I know."

"That's what I'm worried about," Eric whispered. "She protects herself so fiercely, she doesn't care what happens to anyone else."

"I don't think that's true," Sookie patted his hand reassuringly as she began to finally strip out of her clothes and prepare for bed.

"She abandoned you when you were at your weakest to protect herself," Eric reminded his wife.

Sookie cocked her head over her shoulder to raise her eyebrows at Eric, "We were eight, Eric. Give a girl a break."

"And she's still hiding her orientation," Eric added.

"Which is no one's business but her own," Sookie planted her hands on her hips defensively.

"I'm not going to win this, am I?" Eric yanked his shirt off in frustration.

"No, but you'll get a mulligan because you're a worried older brother dealing with his sister's first relationship," Sookie told him. "Now get naked, so I can stop being annoyed with you."

Eric couldn't contain his laughter at Sookie's command and quickly stripped out of the rest of his clothes. "Am I forgiven?"

Pulling her bottom lip between her teeth, Sookie nodded.

{†}

"Well," Alcide laughed as he walked through the airport with his girlfriend, "that was an eventful Christmas vacation!"

Claudine also chuckled as she squeezed Alcide's hand, but the sound was strained. Several times over break, Claudine had felt that her boyfriend was distracted. He'd stop suddenly and stare off at a passerby, or squint at people on the street. One time she'd noticed him looking out the window at the neighbor across the street's old, blue Chevy like it was about to come to life.

When Claudine spotted Sookie behind them, she let out a relieved sigh. Hopefully, she would get Sookie alone in the girl's bathroom before take-off, and she'd be able to unload her frustrations.

"Hey, guys," Eric greeted his friends. "How do you always get here before us?"

"I live in Shreveport?" Alcide hinted, making Eric roll his eyes.

"How was your first Christmas without Adele?" Claudine asked her cousin with a snicker.

"We had a little Christmas celebration before they left," Sookie shrugged. "It was alright, but I hope we can have some real fun next year!"

"Maybe we can have a big Christmas party next year with the _whole_ family," Claudine suggestion. "Come with me to the bathroom!"

Sookie didn't have a chance to protest as Claudine yanked her arm toward the restroom.

"Claudine looked like she wanted an excuse to get away," Eric commented as he watched the two women leave.

Alcide flinched at Eric's observation. "I'm losing it, Man."

"What do you mean?"

"All through vacation I thought I saw Debbie _everywhere_ ," Alcide explained. "At one point, I thought she was camped out in front of my house overnight."

Eric's brow furrowed, "What are you talking about?"

"Either I'm going crazy, or I think Debbie's stalking me," Alcide whispered. "And I'm worried that she might do something to Claudine."

Eric crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned in to talk to Alcide more privately, "You should talk to Claudine's dad and see if he can hire a private security measure."

Alcide blinked in surprise, "Wait, what?"

"Have someone tail Claudine and keep an eye out for Debbie," Eric whispered. "Debbie dropped out of school after developing a bad drug habit, and then starts stalking you after you begin dating a girl worth a pretty hefty ransom? If she _is_ stalking you, who knows what a junkie and her new friends will do?"

Alcide could feel the blood draining from his face. "Oh my, God. Should I tell Claudine?"

"Of course you should tell Claudine," Eric snapped.

Alcide nodded at Eric's reasoning. "Yeah, you're right," Alcide laughed nervously. "I was just scared that I might be overreacting."

"Better to overreact than put Claudine in harm's way," Eric pointed out.

The two men stood silently, waiting for the women to return. A sense of relief came to Eric as he considered the fact that no one had any clue that he _or_ Sookie had their own inheritances.

 **TBC**

 **A/N: PLEASE REMEMBER TO REVIEW!**

 **-ANDI**


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Thirty: Fooled**

 **June 21, 1999**

Sookie Northman couldn't stop humming to herself as she brushed her hair smooth and then began twisting it into a bun. She was off to school, her first day back since her anniversary trip with Eric. They'd spent all Thursday through Sunday in a small mountain cabin in the Ozarks. It had been isolated, _hot_ and even better than her romance books said it would be.

Ahead of schedule, Sookie threw out her birth control a few weeks before their anniversary, and she could still feel a little spring in her step at the prospect of officially attempting to start a family. Her prescription hadn't quite made it to the date they had chosen, and Eric agreed it was silly to buy more that she wouldn't finish.

Sookie wasn't going to kid herself and believe she'd get pregnant right away, but just the act of throwing out her pills had brought her spirits up.

Pulling a white undershirt over her head, Sookie tucked the tail into her slacks and tugged the button of her pants toward the hole to fasten them. Two inches shy of catching, Sookie sucked her gut in and tried again.

"Jesus," Sookie's fingers broke into a sweat before she could get the button.

"What's wrong?" her husband called from the bathroom, emerging with a toothbrush in his mouth and scrubbing away.

"I can't fasten my pants," Sookie grunted before flopping onto her back on the bed and using the tried and true technique of conquering stubborn waistbands.

"Sookie," Eric pulled the toothbrush from his mouth and pointed, "those are my pants." He noted the hem of the legs extended far past Sookie's foot.

"Oh, _God_ , strike me dead!" Sookie moaned.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Love," Eric chuckled, "but you will _never_ fit in my pants with those sexy hips of yours." He stuck his toothbrush back in his mouth and went into their closet to retrieve Sookie's pants. He found them among his own. Sookie must have mixed the two up when putting them away. "Here."

Sookie took her slacks and slid them on. They were a bit snug, but her pants always felt tight after a trip through the dryer.

 _Okay, maybe I am getting my hopes up already,_ Sookie admitted to herself.

"I'll be ready to take you to school in a second," Eric told his wife as he walked back into the bathroom to finish brushing his teeth. "I promise we'll get you a car before my next semester starts!"

"It's okay," Sookie beamed. "I like having my husband drive me around. It makes me feel special."

Eric returned and hugged Sookie tightly. "That's because you _are_ special." Leaning in, he kissed her deeply, and when he pulled away, he watched Sookie's brow furrow contemplatively as she licked her lips several times. "What?"

"We need to switch toothpaste. This one has way too much baking soda in it. It's not real kiss appealing," Sookie told him with a laugh.

Eric rolled his eyes, "That pallet training you've been doing is going to ruin us. Soon you'll be restricting my diet because my cum doesn't taste good enough."

Sookie snorted on a laugh, "Well, I hope not to be tasting it too much for a while. I want it all in here," she patted her lower belly.

Exasperation immediately evaporated at his wife's comment, and Eric found himself humming low in his throat. "I think I can load you up before class."

"Ew! Eric, no! I am not gonna have you dripping out of me all through class," Sookie made a face, and it brought a smile to Eric as he kissed his wife again.

"No?" He placed his hands on her hips and swayed them back and forth.

"No," she repeated as she bit her lip.

"Okay," Eric shrugged playfully and turned away.

"Wait!" Sookie grabbed his hand. "Real quick, okay?"

"I'll do my best," Eric quickly unbuttoned Sookie's pants and turned her around. "Bend over the bed, and I bet I can set a land speed record."

Sookie giggled as she turned around and wiggled her bottom at her husband before leaning over the mattress. Her laughter quickly turned into a squeal as Eric knelt behind her and gave her center brief attention with his mouth. Her toes curled as he kneaded her cheeks with his hands and lapped his tongue between her folds. His tongue was worth being late to class over, but Sookie had already missed a day for her anniversary trip.

"Oh, hurry," Sookie whispered as she shimmied against her husband's face.

"You're such a romantic," Eric taunted as he rose from his knees and quickly took what she offered. Wrapping his arm around Sookie's chest, Eric thrust deep and hard to earn a few shocked whimpers. When he felt her body begin to squirm, Eric let his hips piston at full speed until he had slammed himself as deep as he could and let his cock pulse with orgasm. "Ah," he groaned before sucking in a quick breath, "you killed him. He's been sucked dry. I have nothing left to give you."

Sookie huffed on a breathless laugh, "I doubt that."

"You can try and push it out if you want," Eric patted her buttock. "He hardly had a drop left in him."

Sookie rolled onto her back to stare at her husband. "We didn't do it _that_ much over the weekend."

"Sookie," Eric looked down at her disbelievingly as she straightened her clothes, "we did it eight times a day for four days. That's _four times_ our daily routine."

"Mmm," Sookie tugged her lip between her teeth. "Do you think we'll still have a lot of sex after we have a baby?"

"I don't know," Eric replied as he went to finish getting ready to drive her to school. "We might not be able to fit it in twice a day with a baby."

Sookie pouted at the idea but figured it was a bridge they would cross when they came to it. Of course, she had heard the stories of sex ending after having a baby, but Gran had assured her it was malarky.

Once the couple was finally on the road, Sookie felt her lips tugging into a broad grin.

Eric glanced at his wife out of the corner of his eye and smiled as well. "I don't know the last time I've seen you smile so much," Eric pointed out.

"My face hurts, and I still can't stop," Sookie agreed. "I feel like I've been waiting forever for this, and now that we're here…" she let out a long breath as if she couldn't find a word to describe her happiness.

"If you're this happy about _trying_ to have a baby, I'm terrified to know how you'll react when you get pregnant," Eric teased as he took Sookie's hand and brought it to his mouth for a kiss.

Their first year of marriage had its rocky moments like anyone would expect, but Eric had to confess that the bits of turbulence they had hit were nothing compared to the bliss they had experienced. Hogging sheets, no eating in the bedroom, wet towels on the floor, and sleeping with lights on had all been issues of giving and taking. However, keeping his own spare blanket under the bed had solved one problem, and Sookie moving his printing calculator and budgeting sheets into the living room had resolved his habit of eating in the bedroom. Eric had conceded to a nightlight in the hallway instead of leaving the living room light on. The wet towels were still a constant battle between them. Eric argued the floors were tile and it didn't matter, Sookie fought tooth and nail that it made the towels musty faster.

Eric's reverie broke momentarily as a loud honk rented the air, and he glanced in his rearview mirror to see a white panel van had been cut off by a little coupe. Assured there was no other danger, the young man went back to his quiet reflections.

All in all, Eric decided they were lucky to fight as little as they did. He had expected Sookie to be upset about not having her own car, but Eric had pointed out that if they were going to be starting a family in the next year, she might have a different idea of what she'd like to drive. Sookie had agreed with her only response being that as long as driving her around wasn't a drag, she didn't mind sharing a car.

Eric was only slightly surprised by how unaltered by money Sookie remained. She and Eric had sat down with their bank statements, a pencil, and a calculator. After deducting taxes from Fintan's wedding gift, Eric showed Sookie how much they could spend each month and discussed investments and savings accounts. Between the present and Eric's stipend, the couple wasn't hurting for cash. Perhaps that was what kept arguments between them minimal. After all, budgets and income were one of the most significant problems for couples young and old.

As they arrived in front of Sookie's school, Eric leaned over and kissed his wife goodbye for the day. "Call me at home if you decide you don't want to cook dinner tonight."

"We've eaten out a lot this week," Sookie pointed out.

"Vacations do that," Eric replied amusedly.

"I'll cook tonight," Sookie assured him before giving her husband one last peck on the lips and hopping out of the car. Eric watched from the curb until his wife was safely in the school before heading home.

As he pulled away from the curb, however, he noticed the white panel van that had been cut off earlier was parked in front of the school. He didn't think much of it. A culinary school had to bring in ingredients, after all.

{†}

"Are you doing alright, Sookie?"

The young woman looked up in surprise at her classmate, Nate, and gave a distracted smile. "I'm fine," she answered, but the truth was, the second she walked into the school, her stomach had been doing flip-flops. All the smells were assaulting her nostrils, and her heart was fluttering all the way down to her gut.

"You look," the young man placed his hands on his hips contemplatively, "distressed."

Sookie shook her head, "No, I'm okay. I think whatever they were cooking earlier left an odor that I'm not liking." The smell was sour, and Sookie found herself subconsciously sniffing the air, trying to locate the origin. When she arrived at a sink, Sookie decided that some dairy product probably hadn't been appropriately flushed and was lingering in the trap.

"Alright, Class," Chef Cho arrived and grinned. "Today we're going to be doing recipe reconstructions. I've prepared a dish, and I want everyone to do their best to replicate it using taste and sight alone." He opened the lid, and Sookie felt the smell hit her in a consuming wave. "Everyone come and get a sample."

Sookie joined the line to retrieve her clue and felt like she could probably replicate the dish by smell alone. She knew it was a beef dish without even looking at it, and could taste the distinct herbs in the air.

Once she had her sample, Sookie got to work duplicating what was in front of her. She moved with assured swiftness, and Chef Cho found himself drawn to her workstation as she put her dish together. Watching as Sookie seasoned her tenderloin cut, Cho crossed his arms over his chest in admiration. She had every spice she needed and had even selected a Port instead of Merlot like the rest of the class.

When the class's time was up, the chef sampled a bite of every replication. After he was through critiquing, he announced that Sookie was the only student to recognize the use of Port wine in the reduction and that the flavor had been offset by the onions. Most students had chosen the Merlot, expecting the yellow onions to add the necessary level of sweetness to the dish. Only Sookie had managed to identify that the level of sugar had been supplied by the Port and not the onions.

Unfortunately for Sookie, she couldn't enjoy her moment because the overwhelming odor of all the garlic was starting to give her a headache. With ten students mashing their garlic into a pulp, the stench was thick and pungent.

Mercifully, they were about to get a break in class, and Sookie decided that a quick jog across the street for a Sprite and some ibuprofen was probably called for. Even though her tummy was perhaps upset by the headache brewing in her skull, a cold, sugary drink sounded like exactly what she needed.

"Hey, Nate," Sookie tapped her classmate on the shoulder, "I'm going to run across the street for a Sprite and some ibuprofen. Can you ask if anyone else needs anything?" Although she could talk to any one person in her class at a time, Sookie still fumbled at speaking to everyone as a group. All their eyes on her and their rapt attention made her body shake.

"Sure," Nate smiled before addressing the class. Most of the students had what they needed, and only Nate requested a Coke.

With a slightly strained smile, Sookie gave a brief, departing wave before grabbing her small purse and heading out of the school. She passed a few students on her way out and gave them a cheerful smile before heading out.

When she arrived on the street, Sookie was confused about the white van parked on the road in front of the school. After attending classes for nearly a year, Sookie had come to recognize the vendor trucks and trailers, and several were what they called 'Chester Vans' in Bon Temps. Only, Sookie stared a bit longer, there were no logos on the sides.

A shiver ran down Sookie's spine as she quickly jogged across the street toward the Walgreens. She remembered Claudine complaining for months now about the security team her father had put on her around the clock thanks to Alcide's paranoia about Debbie. She wondered if Alcide had the same prickle up his spine when he saw Debbie as Sookie did when she saw the mysterious van.

 _You're just being stupid,_ Sookie told herself. After everything she'd experienced in her life, she tried to say to herself that being suspicious just came with the territory. Yet, the last time she'd felt this rush of self-preservation, she'd been brutally beaten by Bill Compton.

Arriving in the store, Sookie grabbed a Sprite and a Coke before heading down the pain reliever aisle. As she scanned for ibuprofen, Sookie saw a box of Midol and frowned. With all the excitement of stopping her birth control, Sookie hadn't even thought about her period. She figured it would be along soon since her nipples were already a bit too sensitive for Eric to play with, and she had a bit of bloating that had made her pants harder to zip that morning.

 _When_ was _my last period?_ Sookie wondered to herself as she set the drinks on the shelf to sift through her small purse. Finding her day planner, Sookie looked for the little red ink dot she used to mark her cycle.

 _Oh!_ Sookie faltered when she had to flip back all the way to April to find her last period. _But you just went off the pill,_ Sookie reasoned. _You probably threw your cycle off._

Still, Sookie couldn't help but nibble her bottom lips contemplatively. Would it be bad luck to just go ahead and buy a pregnancy test? She promised herself she wouldn't go baby crazy and jump at every little thing. _Maybe it's okay to just get over excited at the first flashing sign,_ Sookie reasoned.

Sookie was sure that she must look rather comical to anyone peering down the aisle and seeing her fiddle with her day planner and blushingly squirm. _Should I take the test with Eric? Will he think I'm overreacting?_

The young woman knew the answer to that was 'No,' and that Eric would want to share in the excitement of their first pregnancy test together. Sookie just had to remind herself over and over not to be disappointed if it came back negative.

Grabbing the sodas back up, Sookie went to the lane with the feminine products and began perusing the pregnancy tests. She had no idea which to buy but decided not to go crazy over it. Instead, she grabbed a brand she had seen on TV before and went up to the checkout with a big grin on her face. In a way, she was excited for the opportunity to even use a test!

Taking her bag in hand, Sookie smiled all the way out the door and through the parking lot. The grin lasted until she got to the perimeter of the blacktop when suddenly a woman came stumbling from between a row of cars.

"Miss!" the young woman called as she frantically waved her arms, "Please, I need your help, please!"

Sookie stared at the woman with the poorly kept afro.

"I locked my baby in my car, please!" the woman begged shrilly, and Sookie felt her heart lurch as she began to jog over to the stranger.

As Sookie came closer, the woman disappeared among the cars again, and Sookie weaved between them, pursuing the bouncing, brown head of hair. When Sookie broke free of the cars, she looked for the woman but didn't see her anywhere. Just as she was about to call out for the frantic mother, the back door of the van she was standing next to flung open.

Sookie felt a hand over her mouth and an arm around her waist as she was hauled into the back of the van. Altogether, Sookie's arms and legs began to flail wildly, and she felt them strike several bodies as well as the tire well. She hardly felt the pain as her limbs hit anything and everything they could reach.

"We've got a live one!" a man laughed. "OW!" Suddenly Sookie felt her head smash back into the metal of the floor, and a bright spark flashed behind her eyes. In her momentarily stunned state, her wrists were captured by one hand, and someone had laid across her legs. Before she could focus on looking around at her captors or start screaming, tape was slapped over her mouth, and a hood was pulled over Sookie's head. Next, her wrists and ankles were taped together, and Sookie was left to lie on her side on the floor of the van.

"That went smoother than I thought it would," Sookie recognized the voice of the frantic mother and groaned to herself. The woman had been so far away when she'd called for help, that Sookie didn't even know what she looked like! All she knew was that she had a dark brown afro and was black.

"I told you she'd fall for the baby in a hot car routine!" another woman's voice laughed, and Sookie thought it sounded vaguely familiar. She couldn't place it, though.

"Shut up, idiot," the fake mother snapped. "You were told that you aren't supposed to talk!"

Laying on the hard floor, Sookie tried to take deep, centering breaths, but her mind was going a mile a minute. She felt her hands shaking in front of her. Idiot Girl, the one who was told to be quiet, seemed to be driving by the distance of her voice. That would mean Fake Mom was riding shotgun. Since two different people had bound her, Sookie had to guess there were _four_ abductors in the car.

A rustling sound came as the van began to bump its way out of the parking lot.

"Sweet, free Coke," the man who'd held her wrists exclaimed happily as Sookie heard the hiss of the soda bottle opening. "Oh, shit," he laughed. "We might be getting double the ransom."

Sookie's jaw tightened.

"What are you talking about?" Fake Mom demanded.

"Pregnancy test," Coke Thief laughed.

"Seriously?" Fake Mom laughed as well.

"How do you plan to get her to pee on it?" Idiot Girl asked.

"Chick's gotta piss some time," Coke Thief pointed out, and Sookie felt dread and an inkling of embarrassment.

 _This is_ not _how I want to find out if I'm pregnant!_ Sookie thought angrily as she pulled at her bonds. The effort made her head pound as blood rushed every direction it could throughout her body. The adrenaline was still zipping strongly in her veins, but even that couldn't dull the persistent throb. _God, how many concussions does that give me now?_ She wondered distractedly, trying to twist her wrists against the tape.

"I really expected her to scream more into the tape," Coke Thief admitted.

"I told you, she's practically a mute," Idiot Girl sighed.

"I told you to shut up!" Fake Mom snarled.

Sookie frowned as she suddenly understood why Idiot Girl sounded familiar. _Debbie!_ Sookie realized. Her voice wasn't an overly familiar one, but Sookie _had_ met Debbie a few times here and there the previous year that she'd come to New Orleans to visit Eric. Everything began to line up and make sense. Debbie Pelt hadn't been stalking Claudine. She'd been following _Alcide_ to find out where Eric had moved to!

 _How did she know Eric has money?_ Sookie wondered. It wasn't something that the Northmans flaunted, especially since they were still on a stipend. Alcide only knew because he'd been to the house, but that had been _after_ he and Debbie broke up.

 _Oh no! Eric!_ Sookie thought worriedly, wondering how much he would panic when he came to pick her up, and she was gone. What would he think had happened to her?

{†}

Eric looked up from his book when the buzzer for his apartment alerted him that someone was at the door. Frowning to himself, Eric went to the intercom.

"Hello?" Eric spoke.

" _Eric Northman?"_ a stern, no-nonsense voice called through the speaker.

"Yes?" Eric answered.

" _This is Detective Stewart from the New Orleans Police Department,"_ Eric felt the blood drain from his face. **"** _I need to talk to you about your wife."_

Eric buzzed the cop inside and waited with his door open as he watched the detective walk as slow as he possibly could up the stairs. Detective Stewart was probably in his mid-thirties with the occasional fleck of gray running through his light brown hair. His eyes were cynical and gray, but his posture stated alertness.

"Badge, please," Eric whispered as his throat tightened and his heart pounded. Detective Stewart opened his credentials, and Eric broke into a light sweat. "Where's my wife?" Eric choked.

"We're trying to figure that out," Detective Stewart told him gently, already believing that the missing girl's husband had nothing to do with her abduction. "May I come inside?"

"Yes, please," Eric stepped back into the apartment and gestured to the living room. "Tea? Can I get you some tea?" Tea solved everything, he remembered his mother's words.

"No, Mr. Northman," Detective Stewart declined. "Why don't you have a seat?"

"I don't know if I can," Eric replied as he leaned heavily against the wall nearest the living room. "What happened?"

Detective Stewart remained standing as well, cautious about letting the distraught husband stay out of arm's reach. He looked like he could collapse to the ground at any minute.

"Around a quarter after eleven, a witness saw your wife dragged into the back of a white, panel van across the street from her school," Detective Stewart began to explain.

Eric briefly remembered the van that he had so easily dismissed that morning. A storm of stomach acid sloshed at the memory, but all he did was swallow hard and clench his jaw as he nodded.

"The witness reported the abduction immediately to the employees of the drugstore, and the police were called," Stewart continued. "Judging by the security footage the store was able to give us, we know there are at least three abductors. The only one we got a view of was a young black girl with an afro."

Eric looked up in surprise and then scowled.

"Do you know her?" Detective Stewart asked in surprise.

"Not her," Eric replied as he rubbed his eyes and then pounded his fist back against the wall angrily. "I know someone who hung out with a girl fitting that description though, and she was stalking my friend late last year."

"Go on," Stewart encouraged.

"My old college roommate, Alcide Herveaux," Eric began to explain.

{†}

"Wow," Fake Mom let out a long sigh, "we actually made it the whole way without a problem."

"Yeah, L- _they_ really know what they're doing," Coke Thief sounded impressed.

Sookie fidgeted on the floor of the van. They'd been driving for nearly a half an hour, but traffic had implied that there had been some lengthy stops here and there. She had a good feeling they were still somewhere in or near New Orleans.

The sound of the back door of the panel van opening came next, and Sookie felt someone grab the tape between her ankles and drag her toward the mouth of the van. An involuntary squeal muffled against the gag over her mouth, and Sookie grunted as she was hoisted over a broad, muscular shoulder.

"How much did she say we'll get for this?" Coke Thief demanded, and Sookie realized it was his shoulder she was balanced on.

"One mil a _piece_ ," Sookie could hear Fake Mom's pleased grin in her tone.

"We'd be able to live like Royalty together once we get down South," Debbie giggled.

" _Shut up!"_ a new voice snarled, and Sookie flinched. The man's voice was near her left ear, and she could only guess this had been the person who had laid across her legs in the van but hadn't spoken a peep the entire journey.

Sookie heard a garage door closing, and realized it must have already been open when they arrived. Another door opened, and Sookie felt herself tremble.

"The little thing's shaking like a leaf," Coke Thief laughed.

Suddenly, Sookie felt the stable body she was balanced on fall away, and let out a momentary shriek as she fell toward the ground. Her heart raced even as she felt her body land on a soft, bouncy couch. A hard poke in her hip made Sookie yelp briefly. The point of Sookie's nail clippers had jabbed the woman on her impact with the sofa.

"Congratulations," a new voice joined her four abductors. It was a woman's voice. "You didn't fuck up."

"Hey, El," Coke Thief greeted. "That's right! We got her and managed to get all the way here without a problem. And guess what! She might be pregnant!"

Sookie heard the room go silent, "Is that right?" El finally asked as her voice came closer to Sookie. "I suppose it's inconsequential," the cold woman said disinterestedly.

Sookie shivered at the tone of El's voice. She sounded calculating and sinister. Whoever El was, she struck Sookie as the brains of this operation. The four who had snatched her seemed to be the muscle.

"What do you mean inconsequential!?" Debbie's voice chimed in.

"Didn't I tell you _not_ to open your trap?" El demanded of Debbie.

"She definitely couldn't keep it shut for the car ride," Fake Mom sold out her co-conspirator.

"Is that right?" Sookie could hear the frown in El's voice. "Why am I not surprised that you would risk compromising yourselves? That makes this even easier."

"No!" Fake Mom yelled.

Sookie jumped as she heard an unmistakable sound of a gun firing. Curling up into as tight of a ball as she could, Sookie squeezed her eyes shut behind her hood and waited for the slaughter to end. A sudden sting in her shoulder made Sookie's eyes widen in the darkness. _Oh my God! I'm shot! I'm shot, aren't I!?_ The increased pounding in her heart only made Sookie's head more painful, and that coupled with the burning in her arm had the young woman straining to suck in a breath around the tape covering her mouth.

"Even if you managed to figure out who they were, you'll never link them to me," El sighed. "You be good now, and maybe you'll get out of this in better shape than them."

Sookie heard the door open and shut, but no footsteps. _She's still in here with me,_ Sookie guessed, wondering how she should act. _How would someone without a plan, without hope react if they weren't being watched?_

Rubbing her face against her shoulder, Sookie sucked a hard, quick breath through her nose, trying to sound like a sniffle. She _was_ terrified, and she had just sat and listened to four people murdered in cold blood, and she'd been shot herself with no idea how severe the damage was. There was even the allusion that El might just up and kill her when she felt like it.

Hiccupping against the tape, Sookie began to shake for real. Even if Sookie managed to make a break for it, there was no guarantee El wouldn't shoot her in the back as she fled.

 _And I really_ do _have to pee!_ Sookie thought in distress.

Sookie heard the door open again and shuddered in a breath to quiet her crying.

"Get in here and clean this mess up," El called out. "I have a ransom to call in."

Sookie sniffled again as she heard heavy footsteps.

When the footsteps entered the room, Sookie could hear the hesitation. Then, as if the last of the conspirators had accepted their responsibility, Sookie listened to the sound of the bodies of Debbie and her friends being dragged out of the room.

As Sookie sat in darkness, listening to the sounds of the corpses being disposed of, she felt a weakness in her body. She felt tired and a bit hopeless. The tiny nail file and clippers were clutched in her fist, but part of her hesitated to use them. Where could she run to? What if they were in the middle of nowhere and she couldn't escape? What if she accidentally caught a glimpse of El or the mystery co-conspirator and they knew it? They would have no choice but to kill her.

 _Then again, El didn't seem to hesitate to kill her friends,_ Sookie reminded herself. It was far more likely that El would just kill her once she had everything she wanted. _You need to try making a break for it, Sookie,_ she told herself as she squeezed the clippers in her palm.

Now, all she had to do was wait and see if she was left alone.

{†}

"That's quite the story," Detective Stewart was frowning by the time Eric finished retelling the circumstances of Alcide Herveaux, Claudine Crane and the Northmans. "Considering how sloppy they were abducting your wife, I would believe it was the work of some junkies, but the _patience_ is what I find confusing. It sounds like they've been stalking you and your friends for nearly a year."

Eric nodded in agreement. He had finally taken a seat on the couch and steepled his hands in front of his mouth as he'd told his story.

Detective Stewart sighed, "I should warn you because the abductors might use it against you."

"What's that?" Eric whispered.

"Your wife bought a pregnancy test while she was in the drugstore," Stewart explained and was surprised when Eric barked on a laugh.

"Of course she did," the young husband felt hot tears trickle from his eyes and unlaced his fingers to brush them aside. "We've been trying for a whole month now. Of course, she'd want to do a test!" Stewart could read the brimming hysteria in the man's voice as his team continued setting up to record a ransom call.

"Are you going to be able to play it cool, Eric? If a ransom is called in, you can't tip your hand that the police have already arrived," Stewart warned gently.

"I'll be fine," Eric rumbled even as his heart let out a distressed throb. _What if Sookie's pregnant? What will they do to her? What_ are _they doing to her?_ To distract himself as they waited, Eric asked, "How did you find me so quickly?"

Detective Stewart found himself smiling, "The cashier at the store identified her immediately and told us she went to school across the street. The school gave me your names and address. I told the school not to contact you."

"In case I had something to do with it?" Eric guessed.

"A good observation," Stewart nodded.

"Sookie watches crime shows like crazy," Eric replied distractedly. "The cops always check out the spouse first."

Stewart gave a brief chuckle, "Would you consider your wife as the fighting type?"

Eric felt a smile tug at his lips, "Sookie is… strong, but only fights when she's pushed far enough. I'm probably the only person she'll fight with over small things, but that's because she knows I can handle her temper tantrums."

"Detective?" an officer interrupted, "We're all set here with the warrant."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty-One: Hostage**

Well manicured fingers dialed the number written out on a sheet of paper beside the telephone. As the receiver was pressed against the voluminous waves of mahogany hair, the phone began to ring, and a distorter was brought up to pouty red lips.

" _Hello?"_ came shortly after the second ring of the phone.

"Eric Northman," the distorter mangled the normally melodic tones of the woman's voice, "we have your wife-"

" _Who is this?_ _My wife is in class!"_ Eric Northman's voice snarled into the phone.

"New Orleans Culinary Academy?" the abductor let the husband know that she was well aware of Sookie Northman's movements. "She would have been safe if she had stayed in school instead of running across the street for Coke and pregnancy tests."

" _Pregnancy tests?"_ Eric gasped in the phone.

"Yes, congratulations, Daddy," the abductor chuckled, "now you can pay to get your wife _and_ your child back. I'd say eight million should do the trick. Have it ready for transport in six hours, and I will call you with further instructions. If you call the police, I'll kill your wife. If you try to contact anyone other than the bank, I kill your wife-"

" _How the_ fuck _do you expect me to put together eight million dollars in six hours without calling anyone?"_ Eric demanded coldly into the phone. " _Do you think I have eight million dollars stashed in my apartment closet? Most of my money is in assets, not cash! I have to call my lawyer. The assets aren't even in my name yet,"_ Eric was whispering harshly. " _My siblings and I don't gain control for at least another three years."_

"You have six hours. Get it done. Don't call the police or your wife will have worse than a busted elbow," the abductor hung up the phone.

{†}

"Stewart," One of the technicians waved his hand, and the detective turned around expectantly, "the phone company says the last incoming call was located in Willow Brook. Here's the full address." The technician handed over a scrap of paper.

"Thanks, Daniels," Detective Stewart picked up the secure line and called in the situation. After he was finished, Stewart looked down at Eric Northman who was seated quietly on the sofa where he had been frozen since the call. "As long as they don't change locations, we'll have her back within the hour." He gave Eric a comforting pat on the back.

"It never goes like this in Sookie's crime shows," Eric found himself mumbling in a state of shock.

Stewart smiled, "It doesn't normally go like this in real life either, but you said yourself that the people who took her were a bunch of junkies, right? They probably know as much about real phone tracing as your wife does."

Eric nodded numbly. The truth was, Eric was trying to figure out _how_ Debbie found out he had millions to lean into for a ransom. It wouldn't be impossible for him to make a plea to his siblings and the three of them to speak with Bobby about the situation. The biggest snare would be that Bobby didn't like Sookie, and he continued to manage the family finances until the three of them finished school. There was no getting around that. Their mother had been quite clear on the matter in her will. Of course, there was always Fintan. Either way, Eric could get the money if need be.

 _But how did she know about the money?_ Eric ran his hand through his hair in frustration. His first thought had been his Aunt Mary Ann. She had made an attempt at the Northman's inheritance once, _but_ she was also well aware that they didn't take control of the estate for at least another three years. If Mary Ann had any intention of making another attempt for the Northman inheritance, Eric couldn't fathom her trying to do so _now_.

The other thing that was bothering him was caller's comment about the busted elbow. Not many people knew the particulars about Sookie's injury during her last year of high school. As a matter of fact, the only ones who knew that it had been specifically Sookie's elbow were his family members and Sookie's.

 _That's not true. Someone else knew,_ Eric remembered as the blood drained from his face. _Someone who also knows about the Beauchéne fortune, but not the particulars surrounding our inheritance._

"Detective Stewart?" Eric looked up suddenly worried.

"What is it, Mr. Northman?" the detective placed his hand over the receiver.

"I think there might be at least one other person that's part of this plan," Eric whispered as he felt his hands go cold.

{†}

Putting down the distorter, the young woman heard music turn on in the room that Sookie Northman was bound within. Concerned, she walked swiftly toward the door as it opened.

"What are you doing?" she hissed.

"Lorena-"

"Don't say my name!" she commanded.

"Why do you think I turned the music on so loud? I'm not calling you 'El.'"

"Bill," Lorena stomped her foot, "what are you doing leaving her alone like that?" Lorena gestured angrily at the door, whispering under her breath.

"You just scared the shit out of her firing that gun all over the place. You even grazed her when you killed Diane," Bill snarled under his breath. "You said no one was going to get killed doing this. The only reason I agreed when you concocted this plan was that you said no one would get hurt. We'd just scare the hell out of Stackhouse and become overnight millionaires."

Lorena scowled, "Debbie fucked up. She wouldn't shut up in front of Stackhouse, and the risks were too high that her voice could have been recognized. I had to cut the risk out."

Bill sighed as he ran his hand through his hair. Since meeting Lorena Edgington, his life had turned around so many times, it might as well have gone through a rinse cycle. He had made a beeline for Mississippi, trying to avoid the warrant for his arrest, and upon arriving in Jackson, he had almost instantly fallen into the arms of Lorena.

Lorena Edgington had come from money and had grown up expecting all the finest things in life, much like her father, Russell. Unfortunately, the money she should have inherited was squandered by her overindulgent father, who had promptly committed suicide after the debt collectors came calling.

For the past year and a half, Lorena had managed to use those around her to get by, but 'getting by,' was no longer enough for the former heiress. That was why, when she had met Bill Compton and listened to his pitiful story about being run out of his hometown by some girl and her wealthy fiancé, Lorena had seen the opportunity she had needed. It took a few months of coaxing more and more information out of Bill. When she discovered the rich fiancé attended school at her old alma mater, Lorena began hatching her plan.

An old college acquaintance by the name of Malcolm Beaumarchais was exactly the connection she needed. Cocky, stupid, and expendable. He also came with his own collection of loyal cronies. Lorena had spent time with Malcolm and his continually rotating associates and knew that he was willing to do almost anything for a quick buck to feed his increasingly expensive lifestyle.

Eventually, Malcolm managed to seduce an acquaintance of Eric Northman to his little band of swingers, teaching dim, little Debbie Pelt about the liberation of drugs and open relationships. After that, it was a few more months before Debbie gave in entirely to Malcolm's _family_ and was finally brought in on the plan to make them all rich. At least, as far as they knew.

Killing Malcolm and his cohorts had always been part of Lorena's plan, despite what she had told Bill. She wanted all of the money for herself and her lover. They would be able to skip the country and live like royalty in South America. Just the two of them forever. As a parting gift, Lorena would offer Bill the opportunity to kill the Stackhouse girl. She would leave the girl's fate in his hands. Personally, she didn't really care whether the hostage lived or died. No matter what pieces they managed to puzzle together, by the time they discovered who the real kidnappers were, she and Bill would be long gone.

"Did you keep the ransom call under ninety seconds?" Bill sighed.

"I doubt the police even know she's gone yet. Besides, New Orleans P.D. isn't the quickest on the uptake, to begin with," Lorena laughed. "It'll probably be an hour before someone even goes to check out the abduction site."

"We should still change locations," Bill insisted. "We should make the second call from somewhere else."

"I kept the call under a minute and a half," Lorena insisted. "How are they going to find us? Even if they tracked the van to this town, it would take them _days_ to search all the possible houses."

Bill scowled, "I don't want to stay here. If Northman even suspected Debbie had anything to do with this, they might think to look for Malcolm's rental."

Lorena rolled her eyes. "Fine. Grab the girl, put her in the trunk of my car. We'll leave the van with the bodies in the garage."

Nodding in relief, Bill turned back to the living room and turned off the music. He watched amusedly as Sookie's body immediately went rigid before scooping her small frame over his shoulder. Bill could feel her abdomen tense against her balancing point, and her legs bent awkwardly as if she were trying to make her body as small as possible.

Without another consideration, Bill carried Sookie to the rusty, red Buick and quickly dropped her in the trunk. When the lid was slammed shut, Sookie let out a small yelp against the tape covering her mouth before letting out a relieved sigh.

Her legs extended, feeling the curve of a tire well and confirming she was in a trunk. Assured that no-one was looking, Sookie continued her slow work of cutting her bindings.

Testing her legs, Sookie tried to tear them free since she could no longer reach them with her nail clippers. As the longer limbs wiggled and bent, Sookie began cutting the bindings at her wrists.

Before the car engine had even turned over, Sookie felt her arms snap free of the duct tape and had to stifle an elated shout. Yanking the hood from her face, Sookie ripped the tape from her mouth and took a deep, cleansing breath.

Finally able to breathe freely, Sookie found it in her to calm the shaking in her hands. Even as the car engine roared and they began to move toward the unknown, Sookie felt like she had, at last, gained a foothold in the situation.

As she bounced along in the trunk, Sookie began looking for further hope. First, she hunched forward and with difficulty brought her legs high enough to rip away the last of her bindings. She would be able to run now.

Next, Sookie peeled back the floor liner, but there was no tire iron. She _did_ , however, find the lever for the jack. Now she had a weapon. The only thing she still needed was to get out of the trunk.

{†}

Detective Stewart arrived at the location of the ransom call to be given bad news. Not only had the kidnappers moved, but four bodies had been found in a van parked in the garage. Of the two dead women found, Stewart found slight comfort in the fact that neither was Sookie Northman.

"Make sure every inch of the house gets processed," Stewart sighed as he rubbed his furrowed brow. He was not looking forward to the following conversation with Mr. Northman.

"Sir," one of the patrol officers that had arrived before him came jogging over, "I spoke to the nearest neighbor. They didn't say they heard any gunshots, but considering how far away the house is, I'm not surprised. She _did_ , however, say that aside from the white panel van, the people staying here also had an old, burgundy Buick. She wasn't too helpful on the model or year, but it's still more than we had before."

"Thanks, Gibbs," Stewart smiled, "Get a BOLO out on a burgundy Buick, and let's see what crops up."

"I already called it in." Stewart frowned at Gibbs' tone. "You won't believe it."

{†}

"What the hell is that noise?" Lorena snapped at the rhythmic thumping. The last thing she needed was the car to break down while they had a hostage in the trunk.

Bill frowned, "She must be thrashing. I hope she's not trying to kick out a tail light."

Lorena glanced around quickly to see if there were any cars before pulling over to the shoulder of the road when she found they were clear of any witnesses.

Grabbing the roll of duct tape, Lorena assured herself that Sookie Northman wouldn't be able to move a millimeter when she was through binding her!

Taking her gun out to assure she maintained control over the hostage, Lorena pointed it at the trunk before popping it open. What the woman didn't expect was the pain of a metal bar to smash into her hand, knocking the gun free, or the excruciating fire that burst into her eye as that pole jabbed suddenly at Lorena's left socket.

A shriek tore from Lorena's mouth as the bar thrust out again, smashed her across the jaw and sent the woman sprawling to the ground.

With her abductor momentarily subdued, Sookie popped out of the trunk and immediately scooped up the gun just as the second abductor came flying out of the passenger's seat.

"Bill?" Sookie whispered in surprise as she pointed the gun at the young man. Lorena lay whimpering on the ground, clutching her ruined eye. Sookie backed away, putting room between herself and her two captors. She wouldn't be foolish and let them near enough to disarm her.

"Hey, Sookie," Bill replied.

Taking a deep breath, Sookie kept the gun trained on Bill. "Pick up the tape and bind up your girlfriend."

"I don't think she's going anywhere," Bill pointed out as he gestured to the blood leaking from between Lorena's fingers.

"And I'm going to be damned sure it stays that way," Sookie replied harshly but was relieved when Bill began following her instructions.

"So," Bill began conversationally as he began taping Lorena up, "when did you start speaking so easily?"

"Not long after you broke my arm," Sookie replied.

"I guess I finally beat some sense into you, huh?" Bill smirked.

Sookie scowled but said nothing. She didn't believe he had anything to do with the recovery of her voice. Even if the concussion he gave her _had_ brought her words back a bit sooner than therapy or medicine could, the fact was, Sookie knew she had already been on the precipice of recovery. She would never let him take that from her.

Bill was only trying to distract her, and Sookie wasn't about to let his cockiness inhibit her escape. The woman, Lorena, was whimpering on the ground as Bill finished binding her.

"Now what?" Bill asked impatiently, his cold glare bringing back many memories for the young woman. "I can't very well tape myself up, now can I?"

"Why don't you give it a try?" Sookie suggested as she finally glanced at the safety on the gun and saw that it wasn't even live. As she flicked the lever that revealed the warning, red dot, she noticed Bill's demeanor quickly change. "Or I can make sure you don't go anywhere with a bullet in your leg."

Bill immediately sat on the ground and began taping his legs together. When he finished with his legs, Sookie instructed her former bully to wrap the duct tape around his right wrist three times and roll onto his stomach. When Bill had done so, Sookie took a deep breath before lunging forward and digging her knee between his shoulder blades. With as much speed as she could manage, Sookie finished binding Bill's left hand to his right and let out a relieved sigh once he was no longer a threat.

Using the remaining duct tape, Sookie made sure neither of her captors would be able to move before re-engaging the safety on the gun and rolling both of them to the side of the road. Now, her new problem became what to do next? She feared if she left them here that a passing motorist would accidentally help them escape. She also worried that someone passing would assume _she_ was the villain in the situation!

"Alright," Sookie let out a long breath before hunching over Bill, "time to get up and get in the trunk." She could see Bill raise his eyebrows at her. "Oh, I'm dead serious, and if you think I won't put a bullet in you out of spite, you're dead wrong."

With her help, Bill was on his feet and hopped toward the car. It was obvious both of them wouldn't fit in the trunk, and Sookie didn't want them together anyway. One of them might be able to free the other.

Before shutting the trunk, Sookie checked it for anything that could be used as a weapon, and finally found the tire iron, which she threw in the passenger seat. Assured Bill couldn't get his hands on anything dangerous, Sookie finally shut the lid.

Next came Lorena. Getting the woman into the back seat was a trial in itself. She was in a great deal of pain, and very uncooperative. Finally, Sookie gave up and scooped Lorena up beneath the armpits to haul into the back of the Buick.

A twinge made Sookie look down at her shoulder, and for the first time since it happened, the young woman remembered that she'd been shot. Thankfully, it didn't seem to be bleeding all that much, and Sookie figured it had been nothing but a graze. It stung like an open wound repeatedly splashed with lemon juice, but Sookie was merely grateful to have gotten off lightly.

With her captives now subdued and placed in the car, Sookie got behind the wheel and turned the vehicle around, returning back the way she had come. They had been in a house, and the young woman was pretty sure she had escaped the trunk shortly after being thrown in it.

As she drove, Sookie gasped in relief as a patrol car flew past her, and Sookie slammed on the brakes before throwing it into park and jumping from the car with her arms waving frantically.

The patrol car slowed to a stop and turned around, its lights flashing as the cop approached.

It was then that Sookie remembered the gun still tucked neatly in the back of her pants and panicked. Raising her arms into the air, Sookie waited for the cop to approach her.

"Sir!" Sookie shouted as she kept her arms raised, ignoring the painful ache it brought in her injured shoulder. _He won't think I'm a threat with my arms up, right?_

"M'am?" the cop tentatively got out of his car, and Sookie couldn't blame him for keeping a hand near his belt.

"My name is Sookie Northman. I was abducted late this morning. My kidnappers are taped in this car. I have a gun tucked in the back of my pants," Sookie rattled off. "Please, help me. I've been shot."

"Alright, keep your hands up then," the officer approached cautiously and quickly took the gun out of the back of her pants before pulling her arms down and cuffing her.

"What are you doing?" Sookie cried in surprise.

"I'm just making sure everyone stays safe," the officer explained.

Bound once again, Sookie felt some of her unease return. "Uh, where should I stand? One's in the backseat, I put the other guy in the trunk."

The officer looked at Sookie in surprise before glancing into the back window of the car. At the sight of the injured woman, the cop grabbed Sookie by the arm and lead her to his patrol vehicle and sat her in the back. As he did, the radio announced a BOLO for a burgundy Buick and an alert of an abducted woman fitting Sookie's description.

"My name's Jim Falkner," the officer told her. "I'm just going to make sure neither of those fools dies. Okay?"

"Okay," Sookie whispered. "Do I have to stay in cuffs? It's hurting my arm."

"Just until I can confirm you're Sookie," Jim smiled. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Sookie sighed. "I'm the one who had the gun."

"Did you use it?"

"No, but the woman did," Sookie told him. "I think she shot at least four people… Can you ask someone to get my husband? I really want to see my husband."

"If there's a BOLO out on you already, I'm sure they'll bring him straight to the hospital when I radio in that I got you," Jim assured as he picked up his radio. "Dispatch, this is Patrol Officer Falkner. I got that Buick and Sookie Northman is doing alright, but I need a couple of ambulances here on Michoud Boulevard." He proceeded to give the rest of the information, and Sookie felt herself relaxing. After that, he returned to the back of the car and undid Sookie's handcuffs. "Sorry about that."

"Woman with a gun and two people duct taped in the back of the car she's driving," Sookie smiled reassuringly at him. "I understand your hesitations."

"Are you cold at all?" Officer Falkner asked before he returned to the Buick.

"No, I'm fine. Thank you," Sookie replied. "I hit my head pretty hard. I don't want to accidentally fall asleep."

"Okay," Falkner mirrored her smile before turning toward the Buick. Sookie followed a short distance, enough to get out of the patrol car, but she kept the vehicle between herself and her abductors.

Sookie watched as the officer released Bill from the trunk, handcuffed him and proceeded to undo the victim's tape job. "What did you do?" Falkner teased, "use the whole roll on him?"

"Yeah," Sookie responded, making the officer laugh. She could hear sirens approaching, and she began to feel her heart pound with anticipation. _I wish Eric would be with them!_

However, her hopes were not met, and all that arrived was two more squad cars, a plain car, and two ambulances.

 **"** Sookie Northman?" I man with brown hair hopped out of the unmarked car.

"Yeah?" Sookie turned herself to him entirely.

"I'm Detective Stewart-"

"Is my husband with you?" Sookie asked hopefully.

"No, M'am. I radioed one of the officers sitting with him to take him to the hospital to meet you," the detective reassured her. "Do you mind if I sit with you in the ambulance?"

"No," Sookie replied, trying to refrain from pouting. She had run out of adrenaline forever ago, and now she felt tired, hungry, and agitated.

"How are you feeling?" Stewart asked as he escorted Sookie to the nearest ambulance. One of the paramedics offered her a hand as she placed her foot on the back of the large truck.

"My head hurts. My arm hurts, and I want to go home and sleep for a week," Sookie replied easily as the emergency medical workers began checking her over. _I really must have a concussion if I'm talking this easily in front of so many strangers._ "I probably have another concussion," she found herself mumbling.

"Another?" Stewart asked in surprise.

"I was in a car accident when I was a kid, and then that guy over there beat the crap out of me my senior year of high school," Sookie remarked.

"Is that Bill Compton?" Stewart asked.

Sookie blinked in surprise, "Yeah… Did Eric tell you that?"

Stewart nodded, "Yes, somehow he figured out Bill had something to do with your abduction. Something about your kidnapper mentioning a broken elbow?"

"Oh," Sookie frowned, "yeah. Bill's the only one other than our family that knew it was my elbow he broke and not just say my arm."

As they spoke, the ambulance began to move, and Sookie felt her heart give an impatient thump against her ribs.

"Do you think you can tell me what happened today? Help me fill in the gaps?" Stewart requested.

"Sure," Sookie nodded. "I went to the Walgreens across the street from my school for some aspirin and a Sprite. Oh! I never brought my classmate his Coke. One of the guys that took me drank it!" Sookie scowled before realizing that Nate would definitely forgive her. "I was heading back to the school when a black girl with a fro started calling for help because she locked her baby in the car. I ran over to see if I could help her, and then I got pulled into the van."

Stewart nodded, the information following the security footage they had recovered perfectly.

"They taped me up and put a hood over my head," Sookie continued. "I was taken somewhere, and I could hear a girl's voice I recognized. Her name was Debbie Pelt. After we got to the house or whatever we were in, that's when the woman who tried to drive off with me shot Debbie and her friends."

"Is that how you got this?" Stewart asked, gesturing to Sookie's arm and the bruise that was welting around the tapered flesh wound.

"Yeah," Sookie glanced at the injury and shrugged. "I guess I got off pretty light."

"How did you get free?" Stewart asked next, managing to keep the awe from his tone at how well Sookie was taking the situation.

"I carry nail clippers with me so I can keep my nails clean and short for school," Sookie replied, and regaled the detective with her escape.

"You did good," Stewart smiled at her.

"I got lucky," Sookie shook her head. "But, better lucky than good."

Stewart's smile widened, "So, are you pregnant?"

Sookie's eyes widened and then she laughed, "Probably not. I just got a little impatient. Eric and I just stopped preventing it last month."

"Risking a pregnancy while you're still in school?" Stewart laughed. "You really are ballsy."

" _Culinary_ school," Sookie pointed out. "A pregnant woman's fantasy."

Stewart laughed again. "I could believe that, but not in the first trimester!"

"Do you have any kids?" Sookie asked conversationally.

"One and a half," Stewart smiled. "My daughter is almost three, and I have a son due in three weeks."

Sookie grinned, "Congratulations."

"Thanks."

"How long have you been married?" Sookie wondered.

Stewart's smile turned bemused, "We've been engaged for four years."

"Oh, I'm sorry I assumed-"

"It's okay," Stewart waved off her apologies. "We were planning our wedding when she got pregnant. Then she didn't want to be big on her wedding day, so we postponed. When she didn't drop the baby weight, she kept holding off and then we got pregnant again." The detective was laughing to himself. "She said after our son gets here, we're going to the Justice of the Peace and getting it over with."

Sookie giggled to herself before she looked up in surprise at the paramedic leaning toward the door.

"We're at the hospital already?" Sookie asked.

"Yup," the paramedic replied. "All ashore who's going ashore."

Sookie accepted his hand as they exited the back of the vehicle, and felt herself become dizzy as she was suddenly tugged from the side and squeezed nearly to death.

"E-Eric," Sookie choked, recognizing her husband's frantic embrace. "I'm okay. Let go. Can't breathe!"

Eric's hold on his wife loosened enough that he could look at her face and capture her lips in a relieved kiss. "You're alright? Are you hurt? I shouldn't have grabbed you like that-"

Sookie laughed, reached up and pinched Eric's chin to give him a gentler kiss. "I'm fine. You didn't hurt me. Now give me a kiss like you haven't seen me in days."

"It would be more than a kiss, and we both know it," Eric cupped her face carefully, but still brought his lips to hers with all the passion and relief he could muster after the emotional rollercoaster he'd been on all morning.

Their kiss was ended abruptly by Detective Stewart who cleared his throat amusedly. "I still need to speak some more with you and your wife. If you'd be so kind as to let her see a doctor so I can get out of your hair?"

"Right!" Eric remembered that they weren't entirely out of the woods yet and finally started looking for a doctor to see to his wife.

"Are you ever going to let me out of the house again?" Sookie wondered, concerned by the edgy concentration in Eric's eyes.

Eric paused in front of the check-in and frowned. "Of course I am."

"Really?" Sookie was skeptical.

"Just… Don't go anywhere by yourself, okay?" Eric pleaded.

Sookie squeezed his hand, "It's not that simple." Eric brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it as he took the chart and handed it to Sookie. She grew more concerned when he didn't reply. "Eric?"

"I could have lost you today," Eric whispered.

Sookie nodded, "You come from money, Eric. Heck, even I do now. I hate to say it, but this might be a thing we have to worry about."

"I _have_ been worried about it," Eric confessed.

Sookie smirked, "Why am I not surprised?" At her husband's responding gaze, Sookie gave his hand a comforting kiss. "Today was a fluke. Bill's really the only person I can think of that knows we have money and hates me enough to try and do something with that information."

Eric's jaw tightened, "So, Compton _was_ involved?"

Sookie nodded slowly, "Your suspicions were correct."

"The person who called in the ransom mentioned your broken elbow," Eric explained. "Other than our families, Bill was the only person who knew which part of your arm was broken." Finishing her file, Sookie went back to the desk to hand it in and wait. "You'd think they'd prioritize someone who could be in shock."

"I'm not in shock," Sookie sighed as they sat back down and she leaned her head against Eric's shoulder.

"I was talking about me," Eric teased.

"Oh, you're fine," Sookie kissed his arm.

They were quiet for a long moment before Eric whispered, "Are you really pregnant?"

Sookie smiled, "Do you think I would have taken the test without you?"

"I thought they made you take it or something," Eric mumbled.

"Eric, I can't even pee with you in the room. How would they _make_ me?" Sookie laughed.

Chuckling at her remark, Eric nodded, "Maybe we should get a test done here?"

Sookie laughed and squeezed Eric's arm harder as she hugged it, "I'm sure I was just impatient."

"I have no doubt that you're impatient," Eric agreed, "but we're here, and you want to know, don't you?"

Sookie sighed, " _Fine_."

"Like pulling teeth," Eric joked.

They sat cozily in the waiting room until Sookie's name was finally called. Eric followed her to the examination room, and the doctor raised his eyebrows. "Your husband?" he asked.

"Yes," Sookie assured, "and I want him here."

"Alright, what is the problem?" the doctor asked.

"She was abducted this morning and had to beat her attackers away with a crowbar," Eric snapped in frustration.

Sookie swatted Eric in the chest, "I _was_ abducted this morning. I have a bullet graze on my right arm-"

"What!?" Eric shouted in surprise as he peeled her sleeve up and moaned. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you'd respond like this. Besides, it's already sealed. Relax," Sookie patted his hand away from her arm. "I also got hit on the head pretty hard."

"And she might be pregnant," Eric added. "Sookie, you need to stop getting hit on the head!"

"It's not like I can control where people hit me!" Sookie groaned. "Now shut up, or you're not staying in here." Eric's mouth immediately shut, and Sookie gave him a quick, reassuring kiss.

After the exchange, the ER doctor began his examination, concluding that Sookie had sustained yet another concussion. A tetanus booster and a pregnancy test were ordered after that. Sookie took the little cup she was offered, grateful to finally be able to relieve her bladder.

When she returned, she felt annoyed to discover that their pregnancy test was no different than the one she would have bought at the store.

After pointing this out to the doctor, he had smiled and explained that their tests took a few hours to process, and this was the best way to decide if it was worth the effort, money and time. At that explanation, Sookie couldn't help but agree.

In a way, Sookie appreciated the less technical method because she and Eric got to experience the anticipation of waiting on their first pregnancy test to signal positive or negative. When the timer went off, Sookie felt Eric take her hand as they tilted the plastic wand to read the small screen.

 **TBC**

 **NEXT UP- THE EPILOGUE!**


	32. Epilogue

**Unspoken Feelings**

 _A/N: Thanks, everyone, for your support through my first AH story! It was fun, but I'm ready to get back to the world of supernatural with the next adventure! I hope you all enjoy the conclusion to 'Unspoken Feelings'!_

 _-Andi_

 **Epilogue: An Unspoken Feeling**

 **March 10, 2000**

"I made it! It's over, it's done!" Eric announced as he arrived home to the apartment he shared with his wife. Sookie smiled at him as she waved from her spot on the couch, which he hoped she hadn't moved from too much while he'd been taking his midterms that day.

"Good job," she grimaced as she tried to rise, but the beach ball she was hiding under her shirt protested her efforts to stand. "Help?"

Eric smiled as he went to assist his wife off the couch. They were officially at the week of their due date, and the young father-to-be had his fingers crossed that Sookie would go into labor during his Spring Break so he would have time to help her with the baby while she recovered.

"How are you feeling?" Eric asked as he pulled Sookie to her feet before giving her belly a greeting caress.

"Crampy, tired, and I've nearly peed myself twice today because your son is practicing his River Dancing on my bladder," Sookie told him. "Other than that, I'm peachy."

"My son," Eric grinned. Truth be told, that short list of discomforts was the most he'd heard his wife complain about the entire pregnancy. He wasn't sure if Sookie was keeping a straight face through the pains of carrying their child or if the whole thing just agreed with her body. Considering she had become pregnant almost immediately after discontinuing her birth control, Eric had to muse that his wife was made to bring new life.

"Yes, yes," Sookie rolled her eyes. Eric had been beside himself since they had discovered they were having a boy. " _Your_ son."

"Are you sure you're okay not having a proper nursery? I've got the whole week to-"

"Eric, there's no point going crazy decorating when we'll be moving up to Shreveport in less than three months," Sookie reminded him. It was true that she _really_ wanted her cute, elephant themed nursery to bring their son home to, but Sookie was nothing if not practical.

Eric sighed, "I know, I just want you to feel that you're bringing Alexander to a safe place."

"He'll be here with us. I know he'll be safe," Sookie assured him. "Are you _ever_ going to call him Alex?"

"I'm sure I will," he laughed. "For now, I like the way the full name feels."

"Are you getting nervous at all?" Sookie asked.

"Are you?" he countered.

"Dreading it," Sookie laughed.

"You could have fooled me," Eric admitted.

With a comforting smile, Sookie confessed, "I'm really nervous about how much it's going to hurt. I mean, I know it'll be worth it because I get Alex in the end, but not knowing how it's going to feel is scary."

Eric nodded, stamping down his concerns. _So what if I still don't feel connected to our son yet?_ _I can't let Sookie know that with her due date coming in just a couple days!_ Despite his terror that he was about to become his father, Eric hadn't been able to concern his wife about it. With any luck, he'd have Alexander in his hands, and something would just click like a light switch. If it didn't, he prayed that he could fake a connection better than his own father had. _God, I know I don't talk to you very often, but_ please _let me love him?_

"Are you okay?" Sookie tilted her head curiously as she saw her husband's gaze grow distant.

"Just hoping he decides to show up on time so I can help you get settled in before Spring Break ends," Eric replied hastily.

Bringing Eric's hand to her lips, she kissed his knuckles soothingly. She wanted to tell him it was okay if he couldn't see past her to connect with Alex just yet. It was going to be alright that his focus was on his wife and not their child just yet. At the moment, Alex needed _her_ and Sookie needed Eric. Once their son was in the world, Eric would finally know what it felt like to hold him and want to protect _him_ ; not just his wife.

"What's wrong, Love?" Eric reached forward to wipe away a tear Sookie hadn't realized was running down her cheek.

"I just want him here _now_ ," Sookie whispered and then sniffled on a laugh. "As scared as I am about labor, I just want him here." She held her arms in the shape of a cradle.

"I know. Me too," Eric assured as he leaned in a kissed his wife's lips. "Now, come on. You should be resting," he said as he tugged his wife toward their bedroom. As he began to kiss her, Sookie let out a sharp gasp and pushed at his chest.

"What's wrong?" Eric asked worriedly. "Did he get you in the lung again?"

"No," Sookie squinted her eyes briefly. "No, just a cramp."

"A contraction?" Eric felt his panic rising.

"Relax," Sookie laughed. "Cramps happen. Especially when he's active, and Alex has been dancing like crazy all day."

"You said you've been crampy all day," Eric reminded her. "So was this one sharper, or feel different?"

"Eric, I'm fine," Sookie smiled reassuringly.

"I'm calling the doctor."

"Eric," Sookie moaned in annoyance. That had been his solution through the entire pregnancy, and Sookie wouldn't blame tiny Dr. Ludwig one _bit_ if she up and started charging enormous fees for all of her husband's phone calls.

"Hello, Dr. Ludwig," Eric had already dialed the well-memorized number, "this is Eric Northman… Again."

" _What is it now, Northman?"_ Ludwig had a certain impatience with husbands but was slightly kinder to the mothers-to-be.

"Sookie's been cramped up all day," Eric began, used to the doctor's shortness with him. "She's been weepy, and now she's having sharper cramps than the rest of the day."

After some back and forth between Eric and Dr. Ludwig, with the occasional clarification from Sookie, the husband smiled to himself as he covered the receiver. "The doctor says it sounds like you're in early labor."

" _What_!?" Sookie cried in surprise.

Her husband grinned, "Told you so."

"But… But… It doesn't hurt all that much!" Sookie protested.

" _Tell her to enjoy it while it lasts,"_ Ludwig replied, having heard the expectant mother. " _Keep an eye on the frequency of the contractions. Call me and then get to the hospital when they're about five minutes apart for about an hour. When she can't talk through them, that's normal, just keep waiting it out until she's in the time frame. She'll be spending enough time in the hospital without prolonging it."_

"Thank you, Doctor. I'll call you when we're on our way," Eric replied.

After hanging up, Eric looked at his pouting wife triumphantly.

"How'd you know?" Sookie's lip jutted out.

"Because you downplay everything," Eric smiled as he returned to bed and curled up with his wife. "So, _did_ you know you were in labor already?"

"I suspected," Sookie mumbled.

"And that's why you got all insecure and scared?" Eric guessed as he wrapped his arms around her belly.

"Yes," she admitted, "but I didn't want you to worry."

"How long have you been having contractions?" Eric whispered curiously.

"I had the first one a little bit before you got home," Sookie told him. "They're really mild, though. The one before you called Ludwig was the strongest so far. I don't think they're very consistent yet."

"Alright," he smiled as he kissed the spot behind her ear that his lips could reach.

"Alright? You're okay?" Sookie asked worriedly.

"I'm fine," he replied serenely.

If her belly weren't in the way, Sookie would have turned around to stare at him speculatively. "Really?"

Smiling, Eric answered, "Really. You're having our baby, and I will keep myself together for you."

"Dr. Ludwig told me she bets you faint during delivery," Sookie remarked.

"Does she?" Eric frowned. "Why?"

"She said you seemed like the type that would tense up trying to keep a straight face and end up keeling over," Sookie giggled.

"I won't faint," Eric assured her. "I couldn't leave you for a second through this."

Sookie laughed, "Do you remember the first time we saw Alex?"

"Oh, you mean the sonogram you held in front of my face with your finger literally pointing at him going, _this is our baby_!" Eric smiled at the memory.

"I was excited," Sookie smirked.

"I also remember watching you like a hawk every morning, ready to hold your hair back in case you finally got struck with morning sickness," Eric recollected. "This pregnancy really agreed with you, didn't it?"

"I loved being pregnant," Sookie admitted. "If I could be four months pregnant forever, I'd be happy. I didn't even have nausea anymore by the fourth month. I had the cutest little baby bump… Now I look like I'm trying to steal a prize turkey at all times."

"I don't know about that," Eric grimaced, "you've had a pretty bad case of pregnancy brain."

"Jeez, _one_ time I put the car keys in the freezer, and you'll never let me live it down," Sookie accused.

The couple reminisced as they lay in bed together, recalling the excitement and hardships of their first pregnancy. In Sookie's opinion, the hardest part, so far, had been overcoming her discomfort with peeing in front of her husband, but having a small human using her bladder as a pillow eventually forced her to deal with it. Eric had laughed the entire time he had been in the shower, and Sookie got her revenge by flushing the toilet. Her husband's yelp had brought a smile to her lips, grateful to be in an older building that gave her such opportunities.

As they lay in bed, Eric could hear the phone start to ring in the living room and sighed. It was probably Adele calling to check in on Sookie, so he crawled out of bed to answer it.

"Hello?" Eric rubbed his eyes tiredly. Midterms and coming home to his wife in labor was exhausting, but he reminded himself that Sookie was having a worse day.

" _Mr. Northman?"_ a vaguely familiar voice greeted. " _This is Desmond Cataliades."_

 _The prosecutor from Bill Compton's case?_ Eric frowned. "What can I do for you?"

Mr. Cataliades replied. " _I_ _was hoping to speak to your wife."_

"She's in labor right now. Can it wait a bit?" Eric replied. Talking about the case that would not begin was the last thing Sookie needed.

" _Oh, congratulations!"_ Cataliades' voice turned more pleasant. **"** _Can you tell her that Bill Compton finally flipped on Lorena Edgington? He's agreed to testify against her, and the trial will begin May 31st."_

"I will tell her," Eric assured. "Thank you." As he hung up the phone, the man decided to wait until they were back home with their son before bringing up the topic. There was no point ruining Sookie's special day with news that wouldn't affect her for nearly three months.

Returning to their bedroom, Eric curled up once more with Sookie, arriving in time for another wave of pain. They continued trying to stay relaxed through the remainder of the evening.

Later, as Sookie's contractions progressed, strengthening and becoming more frequent; she knew this would be a far greater discomfort than bathroom privacy.

"Is that another one?" Eric asked in surprise.

"Yesss," Sookie hissed slowly through her teeth.

"They're getting a lot closer," Eric commented.

"No, really?" Sookie snapped.

Eric would have laughed if he wasn't so upset about Sookie's obvious pain.

"Sorry," Sookie let out a long sigh as the remainder of the contraction finished.

"Are you sure you won't want an epidural?" Eric tested again. He'd much rather she reduce the pain as much as possible.

"It's not fair asking me this _now_ ," Sookie frowned. "Of course I don't _want_ to be in pain. That doesn't mean I'm going to change my mind, though!"

Eric soothed her hair to try and calm himself down. It was easy enough to keep his voice even, but his heart hadn't stopped pounding for the last hour. _That can't be healthy,_ he thought distractedly.

As the afternoon melted away into early evening, Eric continued tending to Sookie, trying to get her to eat here and there and keep her strength up. When she admitted the contractions had her sick to her stomach, he opted to at least get her drinking a sports drink. That was easier for his wife to handle, and she guzzled a Gatorade between contractions. He would help her pace around the apartment as the movement eased some of the pain in her back, but Eric began feeling more and more helpless as the evening wore on.

It was nearly noon when the frequency of the waves were hitting Sookie too quickly to recover, and Eric decided it was time that they head for the hospital.

"Alright," Eric grabbed her bag and slung it over his shoulder, "hang out right there, Sookie. I'm going to call Ludwig and then I'll get your shoes on you."

"I'll just get my flip flops," Sookie groaned.

"It's barely in the 50's out there, Sookie," Eric argued as he picked up the phone.

"I don't care," Sookie shuffled toward the door and slid her feet into the squishy sandals.

Eric decided he was better off not arguing and finished dialing the hospital, "Dr. Ludwig, it's Eric Northman. We're heading your way."

" _Already? You're not panicking and heading here early, are you?"_ Ludwig demanded.

"No," he sighed. "We were about ten minutes into five-minute intervals, and then Sookie was only four minutes apart."

" _Get here,"_ Ludwig hung up.

Eric swallowed hard at the doctor's command. A light sheen of sweat broke out across his forehead as he distractedly checked his pockets for his keys and wallet.

"Ready," he rasped as he took his wife's hand and lead her toward the stairs.

"I forgot about the _stairs_ _,_ "Sookie wailed.

"Can you do it?" Eric asked worriedly.

"Yeeeesss," she sniffled.

"Do you want me to carry you down?" Eric opened his arms.

"You'll kill all three of us!" Sookie sobbed even harder.

"Oh my God," Eric groaned as he scooped Sookie into his arms. Her arms instinctively wrapped around his neck.

After safely arriving at the car, the actual trip took a while with the traffic surrounding the beginning of the school break. People would be going on vacations, going home to family, but Eric would be _starting_ a family.

"How are you holding up?" Sookie patted her husband's hand.

With a gentle smile, he replied, "Hey, that's my line."

"I'm-" she sucked in a sharp breath.

"Another contraction?" Eric took her hand as she nodded tightly. His heart accelerated just as it had through every contraction beginning with mild all the way to whatever Sookie was experiencing now.

Once they arrived at the hospital, everything seemed to move too quickly for the young father-to-be. Eric felt wrapped in a whirlwind and wondered if Sookie was doing any better of a job taking it all in than he was. Sookie's legs were in stirrups, everyone was peeking in at her vagina, and Eric felt like he should be frustrated by strangers taking a look at his wife's goods.

Instead, Eric stared dumbly at his wife, and Sookie gave him a pitying smile. "It's okay, Eric."

"I don't know what to do," Eric confessed as Dr. Ludwig strutted into the room.

"I've been telling you that since the beginning," Ludwig sneered at the husband. "That's why your wife listens to _me_ and not you." Taking a seat between her patient's thighs, Ludwig felt around and smiled, "Well, it looks like you're ready."

"Already!?" Eric yelped.

"Get him _out_ ," Sookie moaned.

"The baby or the husband?" Ludwig teased.

"The baby!" Sookie snapped.

"Alright, alright. Daddy, hold Mommy's hand, and I don't want to hear another word out of you," Ludwig instructed.

That command was simple enough for Eric to follow. He didn't know what to say anyway.

Again the world turned uninformative, but instead of a whirlwind, Eric felt like he was now in slow motion. As he glanced down to see how things were moving along, the man felt his vision narrow into a tunnel at what appeared to be the biggest baby head in the history of the world breaking through his wife's vagina like a wrecking ball. Sookie was screaming, his hand felt like it might break, and all Eric could think was, _Shit, I might actually pass out-_

"You made it!" Ludwig crowed happily as she held up a shrieking bundle. "Do you want to cut the cord, Daddy?"

Suddenly, a sharp pair of scissors were in Eric's hand, and a nurse ambivalently held his hand steady, practically cutting the cord herself. Then, the scissors were taken from him, and a baby was put in his awkwardly poised hands.

"Hi," Eric said dumbly as he stared at the squinted eyes and misshapen head. "You look like you've been through a worse day than me," he laughed in near hysterics. "I think you should see the real hero of the day, though." Sitting in the chair near Sookie's head, Eric turned their son to lay across his wife's breast.

"Alex!" Sookie's arms wrapped around her son happily. "Oh, I've wanted you here for so long!" She planted kisses all along his uneven scalp.

"Okay, okay, we need to get the baby cleaned up and checked up," Ludwig patted Sookie's thigh. "And I need to get _you_ cleaned up and fixed up."

"Eric, stay with Alex," Sookie kissed her husband's hand.

"I will," he assured. "Take care of my wife, Ludwig."

Sookie was surprised how readily Eric agreed to leave her side, but her heart warmed that he finally saw Alex as more than part of her.

Barely able to crane her head to keep her husband and son in view, Sookie felt tears drip down her cheeks as she saw Eric play with Alex's little foot as he was weighed and washed.

"You're so brave, Alex," she heard Eric whisper. "Daddy's so proud! I love you so much!"

{†}

 **September 13, 2004**

"Hey, Northman!" Eric looked up from his desk at the person calling his name to find Sookie's Great Uncle Dermot approaching. "I thought you were taking the week off because the old Sperm Bank is due this week!"

"How about if you ever call my wife that again, I call HR?" Eric replied.

Ever since starting work as an accountant at Elfyria nearly four years ago, Eric had quickly decided that the company was not one he wished to remain a part of for very long. _Sixty-hour work weeks for an accountant year round!_ He thought sourly, remembering how the hours became even more grueling around tax season. The time he had with his wife and sons was already limited, and working for a prestigious firm did nothing to make the time away from his family acceptable.

Dermot scowled, "I was merely making a joke that your wife is practically a professional at having children. This is your _fourth_ , isn't it?"

"Yes, but our last birth was twins," Eric reminded that Lukas and Leif were twins.

Sookie had chosen the names because she had been reading about Leif Ericson and thought it would be funny because Leif _would_ _be_ Eric's son. After that, Lukas had been an easy pick because she wanted the twins' names to start with the same letter.

"Eric!" A new voice chimed happily, and Eric turned his head to see Fintan approaching.

"Hi, Fintan," Eric greeted with a nod.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were staying home this week with Sookie and the kids?" Fintan smiled.

"I forgot to print out some paperwork," Eric shrugged.

"Paperwork?" Fintan tilted his head curiously.

 _A letter of resignation,_ Eric thought smugly. It had taken a bit of time after Pam's graduation, but they all had their inheritance now. Elfyria had no pull on him any longer.

"Yes," Eric nodded, "and now I have it, so I'm going home."

"Well, take care, and if you need Addy and me to watch the boys; don't hesitate to call," Fintan hugged Eric excitedly. "Another great-grandson!"

"Yes," Eric smiled tightly. He didn't like Dermot's continued presence in the room.

"Have you decided on a name for this one?" Fintan asked.

"Beck," Eric's smile softened.

"Beck?" Fintan asked curiously.

Eric shrugged, "Sookie finally let me pick a name."

Fintan laughed and patted Eric's back, "Have a good week off. Take plenty of pictures of the new arrival."

"You got it," Eric waved goodbye, tempted to signal with his middle finger to Dermot, but resisting admirably.

The other reason Eric felt comfortable abandoning his job at Elfyria was because a corner commercial lot had finally gone up for sale, which would give Eric and Sookie the last piece of the puzzle they needed for their dream. Once the property was purchased, bulldozed and built back up, the couple would erect the bakery Sookie had envisioned. Above the quaint shop would be their home, not two blocks away from their children's future school.

As Eric drove home, he couldn't help but to cruise past the site of their future business and home. Parking momentarily across the street from the location, Eric smiled as he visualized the French revival inspired building. The main floor would be for the bakery, which his new cousin-in-law, Alcide, had insisted they call 'Sookie's Cookies,' and there would be little bistro chairs and tables outside as well as inside. A pretty, white building with a blue roof, as Sookie had often described.

Finally, Eric pulled back onto the road and finished his drive home. As he came to their apartment door, he could hear Alex crying and Sookie tiredly soothing him.

"Mommy's not dying, Alex," Sookie tried to explain. "Your brother's coming, that's all."

 _Shit,_ Eric sighed. _I leave her alone for one hour, and she goes into labor!_

Opening the door, Eric promptly scooped up his oldest son. "Hey, Big Man," Eric noisily kissed Alex's cheek. "Go check on your brothers," he gave his son a tight hug, plopped him back on his feet and patted his bottom to get him going down the hallway. "Hey, Mamma," Eric came up behind his wife where she stood leaning tiredly over the sink, shifting her weight, "how far apart?"

"You'll kill me," Sookie grumbled.

Eric sighed, "You're already five minutes apart, aren't you?"

"I'm crowning," Sookie replied.

Eric's eyes widened as he realized Sookie was standing on a towel that was sopping up the blood streaming down her legs. _No wonder Alex thought she was dying_ , he sighed.

"Did you call Claudine?" Eric asked.

"Yes, when the contractions got consistent," Sookie replied.

"When was that?"

"Thirty minutes a-a-go," Sookie gritted her teeth.

"You can't just go through early labor without telling anyone, Sookie," Eric told her. "This is our fourth child. Your body is like a waterslide now!"

Reaching out, Sookie grabbed her husband's ear and gave it a yank, "You _will_ take that back!"

"Ah, ah!" Eric snarled, "I meant… OW! I mean, your body is- JESUS! I can't apologize while you're ripping my ear off!"

"You don't get to name him now!" Sookie howled.

"Sookie, let go, I have to catch him," Eric put his hands up his wife's dress and cradled them to receive his son. With another shouting heave from his wife, Eric was holding Beck in his hands.

"Mommy," Alex's voice chimed. "Mommy, did you die?"

"Alex," Eric patted his newborn on the back until a tiny wail filled the air, "push that kitchen chair over here. Mommy needs to sit down."

Dutifully, Alex grabbed a chair by the seat and dragged it across the linoleum so that Sookie could sit down heavily upon it.

"Is dat Beck?" Alex grinned happily at the baby in Eric's bloodied arms.

"Yes, it is," Eric introduced his sons. "How are your brothers?"

"Sleepin'," Alex shrugged disappointedly.

"That's good," Eric was wiping Beck's face with his sleeve, trying to clear the birthing fluids from his mouth, nose, and eyes. "Aunt Claudine will be here soon, and then I have to take Mommy and Beck to the doctor. Can you go play in your room until Aunt Claudine gets here?"

"Yes, Daddy," Alex nodded his head but sulked all the way back to his room.

When they were alone, Eric turned to his wife, "I'm sorry I called your vagina a waterslide."

"I'm sorry I nearly ripped your ear off," Sookie grimaced as she felt the void in her womb and the encore of the afterbirth. "Can I have Beck?"

"You're letting me keep the name?" Eric smiled.

"That's the name Alex knows him by," Sookie reached out her arms for her youngest son. "Besides… My vagina _is_ a water slide," She sniffled.

"Oh, Sookie," Eric had to restrain a laugh, "it's the _best_ water slide."

"Even for my husband?" Sookie looked at him with a pout.

"Especially for your husband," Eric assured as he leaned in and kissed her lips.

The snap of the front door made Eric look over at Claudine and her husband who were standing in the doorway, staring into the kitchen.

"Well," Alcide's eyes were wide, " _we_ missed a fucking party."

{†}

 **January 11, 2007**

"Wake up, Love," Eric whispered to his wife. "Today's the day."

Sookie groaned, "What's the point?"

"What do you mean?" Eric frowned as he spooned behind his wife.

"This is my fifth pregnancy, Eric. This is my _second_ pregnancy with twins," Sookie sighed as she kept her eyes shut.

"What does that have to do with your ultrasound today?" Eric asked as he played with the ends of her hair.

"Everything feels like every other pregnancy," Sookie shrugged.

"We get to find out the babies' sexes," Eric pointed out.

"They'll be boys. They're _always_ boys," Sookie pouted. "You're so darn masculine all you got are baby boy darts."

"I don't know," Eric frowned, "I got a good feeling about this one."

"Eric, you get a good feeling for _all_ the pregnancies. That's how I end up pregnant," Sookie smiled as she gingerly rolled over.

"Come on," Eric tugged her fully onto her other side, "Godric and Thalia will be here in a few minutes. You don't want her thinking pregnancy is dull, do you? She'll be blind-sided when Alice is born."

Sookie pouted. She'd wanted to use Eric's mother's name for their first daughter, but pregnancy after pregnancy, she'd pushed out boys. Now, Godric was married to a beautiful woman he met in his abnormal psychology class, and on their first try were having a baby girl. If their next child was a boy, Sookie was going to be a little frustrated.

"We can always stop after this pregnancy, Sookie," Eric reminded her. "We don't _have_ to have a girl."

"But I want a girl," Sookie pouted.

"I know you do," Eric smiled. "Come on, you need to feed Andy before my brother gets here."

Sookie groaned, but let herself be heaved out of bed. _Maybe this should be our last pregnancy,_ she considered as she dressed. Their bakery was under construction and would be opening later that Fall, and it couldn't come soon enough because Shreveport just didn't have apartments for families of _nine_! Poor Alex looked about ready to murder something, sharing a room with all of his younger brothers ranging from a year to six years old. When they finally moved onto the corner lot the bakery was being built on, they would _all_ be able to spread their arms out.

"I think this should be our last pregnancy," Sookie whispered as she found her shoes and finished dressing.

Eric turned to look at his wife in surprise. "Are you serious, or just tired?" He remembered that when she was carrying Leif and Luke, that Sookie had said something similar, but had changed her mind shortly after they were born.

"I don't know," she confessed, but in her heart, she was certain that she was done. _Seven_ kids all under the age of ten and a business opening in a few short months… Sookie just couldn't fathom handling all of it.

A soft smile tugged at his lips. _Sookie's tired,_ he decided as he leaned in and gave his wife a soft kiss. "How about, this time, after the babies come, we start using birth control again. Maybe you need a break."

Sookie leaned her forehead against her husband's shoulder. "I thought you said I'm having a girl this time?"

"I still think that," Eric chuckled, "but after Alex was born, I never gave another thought to the having more until we have one of each. It became more of a 'keep going until Sookie says she's had enough,' thing."

"I know," Sookie smiled. "The way you followed him around the hospital room after he was born, and the doctor was finishing up with me… I knew that 'Daddy,' was officially stamped on your heart. Even while I was still recovering from labor, you just couldn't stand with me and leave him."

"I'm sorry," Eric grimaced.

"No, don't be sorry," Sookie laughed as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "It's how it should be. Our babies should always come first."

Without realizing it, Eric felt their bodies begin to rock and sway in a silent dance. He remembered returning to Elfyria after the twins were born and discovering that his body had forgotten how to be still. He stepped from side to side while standing, and he churned in his seat while sitting. After continuous rocking of his children to sleep, Eric had stopped realizing that he was doing it without a baby in his arms.

After the comforting sway of their bodies ceased, Sookie went to check on her youngest to make sure he was fed before they left.

As Andrew clamped onto her breast, Sookie shut her eyes and remembered the day he was born. She'd told Eric she was in labor as soon as she felt it, and they had made their way to the hospital. Unfortunately, there had been a car accident en route, and Sookie had delivered Andy in the car in front of God and everybody on Highland Avenue.

When Andrew finished his meal, Sookie brought him out to the living room to romp around with his brothers. Alex was playing with his action figures, Leif and Luke were about to decapitate one of their identical stuffed dogs because (well, Sookie wasn't quite sure _why_ ), and Beck was coloring with a pout on his little face.

"What's wrong, Munchkin?" Sookie asked as she sat on the floor with Andy over his shoulder and a hand patting firmly over his back to ease the milk burps.

"I wanna puppy," Beck sniffled, looking longingly at the poor stuffed animal that the twins were fighting over.

"Why don't you play with Leif's puppy?" Sookie suggested, pointing to the toy that had been spared the draw and quartering.

"I wanna _real_ puppy," Beck whined. "Alex says we don't get real puppies, just brudders."

Sookie smiled, amused at her oldest son's point. "Maybe when you guys are older and show you can take care of one. After all, I have to take care of you and your little brothers. I don't have time to take care of a puppy too."

"So, if you stop having babies, we can have a puppy instead?"

 _Oh, no,_ Sookie frowned. Her boys were definitely over expanding their family. _Maybe it really is time to stop trying,_ she considered. _After all, I've already got the best five boys a mom could want._ Without meaning it to, a tear escaped Sookie's eye, and she wiped at it in annoyance. The tears had been her first clue that she was carrying twins before the doctor even confirmed she was pregnant. After her experience carrying Luke and Leif, Sookie _knew_ all the variations between a single and double pregnancy, and the increased waterworks were a trademark of twins for her.

A knock at the door had Sookie crawling back to her feet, and she smiled happily at the big belly greeting her at the door.

"Hey, Thalia," Sookie leaned around the globe between them and hugged her sister-in-law.

"Hi, Sookie," Thalia returned the hug begrudgingly, her face sour.

"It looks like you could be having a better day," Sookie commented apologetically.

"Alice is hyper today," Godric explained as he leaned in the door and hugged Sookie. "Thalia didn't sleep too well because of it."

"She's learning to play the drums on my kidneys," Thalia grumbled.

"Are you sure you're up for babysitting?" Sookie asked, prepared to bypass the ultrasound for now.

"Are you kidding?" Godric laughed, "We need to find out if you finally got a girl in there!"

Sookie resisted the urge to pout. It was worth going for an ultrasound to shut everyone up! _And who knows, maybe everyone's persistent optimism will pay off,_ she forced herself to consider.

Once the boys were settled in with their Uncle and Aunt, Sookie and Eric made their way to the car. It was always strange not to have a backseat of boys, but the silence was welcome. The pair basked in the quiet the entire ride to the doctor's office, and Sookie found her eyes gently shutting shortly before Eric parked in front of the building.

"We're here," he announced in a smiling voice that made Sookie's eyes open and her teeth shine with their own smile. Five pregnancies, two of which he'd delivered himself, and her husband still treated each one with excitement.

As they walked into the waiting room, the receptionist smiled and waved, "Hi, again, Mrs. Northman! You gonna let Dr. Kemper deliver this set?"

"We'll see," Sookie smiled as she signed in for her appointment and went to sit and wait for her turn.

They sat quietly, waiting for their turn with the doctor, and it was in that time that Sookie began to truly make up her mind. After this set of twins, she and Eric would have _seven_ kids. That was even more than Sookie had initially planned on having. Each little boy had brought more and more happiness to their lives, and she wouldn't trade any one of the men in her life for a little girl. Still, her body was saying she was done. She felt that she spent more time pregnant and asleep than she did with her family.

"No matter what," Sookie mumbled, "this is the last pregnancy."

Eric glanced down at his shoulder and the blonde head that rested on it. She sounded more determined than he'd ever heard. A small weight on his heart pulled the beating organ toward his stomach, but Eric knew it was the disappointment of this being the last pregnancy. Despite all the fears and insecurities he'd had through the first experience, Eric had discovered that fatherhood agreed with him much like motherhood agreed with Sookie.

"Okay," Eric took Sookie's hand and kissed her knuckles. "You're getting your girl this time. I _know_ you are."

"It doesn't matter," Sookie smiled, her eyes still gently shut. "I love all my men." Her eyes opened to gaze up at Eric adoringly. "We gave it everything we had, and if this set of twins are boys, too, then that was God's plan."

Smiling, Eric held his wife's hand as they waited to be called to the examination room. When their name was announced, Eric found himself doing something he rarely ever did. In fact, it was only during pregnancy that the man felt the compulsion. He prayed.

As much as having a daughter terrified him, he wanted it. Being an older brother to Pam had come with annoyances and heartaches, but he wouldn't have traded his sister for a younger brother.

"Good morning, Mrs. Northman," Dr. Kemper greeted as she arrived in the examination room. "How are we feeling?"

"Pretty on par with every other time," Sookie assured.

After the routine exam was completed, it was finally time for the ultrasound.

"Well, there's baby boy number six," Dr. Kemper laughed after a moment of swiveling the wand around and finally finding an angle that gave her answers.

Letting out a long sigh, Sookie felt annoyance with herself when a pang of disappointment thrummed at her heart. She didn't mean to feel it, and guilt quickly followed with the annoying tears that always accompanied negative emotions during her pregnancies. Even Eric's firm hand squeezing her own couldn't bring any comfort.

"And baby number seven," Dr. Kempter smiled, "is going to cause a lot of broken hearts in sixteen years when her brothers start scaring off the boyfriends."

"Her?" Sookie gasped.

"You finally got your girl!" Dr. Kemper grinned.

In a brief moment that neither her doctor nor her husband could fathom, Sookie felt a spectrum of emotions that ranged from guilt to elation. Her guilt over the excitement of finally having a girl was quickly swept aside.

"I'll give you two a minute," the doctor smiled as she left the couple alone with the image of their children frozen on the monitor.

"I can't believe this is the first and last time someone's going to tell me we are having a daughter," Eric whispered as he took Sookie's hand in his and squeezed it.

"It feels like we've come a long way, doesn't it?" Sookie laughed.

"When I remember the girl you were when we first met, and see the woman you are now," Eric took a deep breath and then laughed, "it feels like I've lived a thousand years. I love you so much."

"I love you, too," Sookie whispered.

As Eric leaned in to kiss his wife and the mother of his children, he felt his heart expanding for her. His love for Sookie had changed so much over the last eleven years that they had known each other. She had gone from a silent, unobtrusive girl to a wise, firmly spoken woman. True, Sookie still held her tongue quite often when she wasn't among close family or friends, but when she chose to talk, it was with accuracy and conviction. Most of all, he loved the way she spoke to him and their children. Every syllable was filled with love when she wasn't in labor, and she made the men in her life know that they were cherished.

"Eric!" Sookie laughed as she wiped away the tears that spilled unbidden from her husband's eyes. She kissed the wet trails and then his lips again.

When the soft plumpness of her lips pressed against his mouth, Eric tried to pour all of his love and affection into this kiss. There were no words for what Sookie meant to him. There was no explaining how she had changed him into a man he never thought he could become. It had all been effortless on her part. Everything had come so naturally. Being a husband and father with Sookie by his side had Eric searching to comprehend how he had been so scared before.

He wished again and again that there was a word for how Sookie and their family made him feel, but he knew there was no point grasping for one. She knew, and so did their boys. So would the little boy and girl that would soon join their family. There was no need to create a word. It could always remain an unspoken feeling.

 **The End**

 **A/N: Check out my wordpress page for release date on my next story! There's a link in my bio. Or just go to dream7me7to7sleep at wordpress dot com.**


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